Relationships

How to stop falling in love with people who are kind to me?

For context: my childhood was spent in a big, joint family full of judgmental elders. Growing up I was very quiet and shy and never really had much friends. I went to an all-girls school as well. I was never approached nicely by anyone from the opposite sex for romantic purposes, all the 3-4 men that did try to show interest in me acted like they did me a favour by liking me.

However, I slowly realised that I am attracted to people who are kind to me and even sometimes to others. For example, the first time I felt like I was in love was when I started college and had accidentally injured my hand. We had to carry stuff to the other room and I had tons of troubles but I couldn't say it. Then, a classmate of mine all of a sudden offered to help by referring to my injury and I felt like I was falling in love. It wasn't reciprocated of course. Later, I remember attending a workshop where a senior year student was discussing a project with us. I was extremely hungry as I hadn't eaten anything all day and I barely manged to stay calm. However, all of a sudden he looked at me and said: "let's take a break for those of you that are hungry." I started liking him so much that I couldn't ever look at his eyes again in fear that he'd read it. Recently, I met a guy who barely knew me but still consoled me on his own as I was in extreme stress about the results of an exam that could decide my entire career. Now, I'm afraid to talk to him.

While it's not a big problem, I don't want to feel this way and randomly avoid people because I keep on falling for them every time they're nice to me. How to stop this and admire people's kindness without growing romantic feelings for them?

How to stop falling in love with people who are kind to me?
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