Why do some females’ say their partner doesn’t love them when their partner still goes home to them?

[Finchie40]

I hear girls’ say this all the time about their men , Oh He doesn’t Love me? if he didn’t Love you , do you think he would be going home to you? Why do some of you girls’ do this?

[PrincessC16]

For one thing, a lot of us have been so fearcly hurt by some men, that we have NO self-esteem. As stupid as it may seem. We are so used to abuse that we can't even fathom what true love feels like. Years of constant abuse will make you feel that you are completely unloveable. It takes a lot of therapy to overcome this. I'm speaking straight from my heart here. So when you do find a good guy who treats you well, you're like, this is a trick. And you don't know how to handle it.

Second, it's not just about your husband coming home to you at night. So what? That single act doesn't make you a husband. A man can come home and he's cheated b 4 he even hits the door, as in my case. Then gaslighted me that I was the "crazy" one! He used the same damn words that you just said. "I'm here ain't I", he would say.

Some men come home to their wives but they are emotionally or physically abusing their wife.

So it's complicated. But a man just coming home to his wife at night is not a direct reflection of his love.

I really hope this brings some insight about why saying that doesn't always "fix" things. Because this isn't the first time I've heard this from men. I know a lot of men feel this way.

[Finchie40]

Yea I agree , I suffered that for a long time until I finally accepted to get help for myself , not realizing all the trauma and stuff I went through in life was actually effecting me even though I didn’t think it was , because I always buried things and looked at the positives in life as much as possible with a smile on my face , but beneath that smile I was hurting inside , and after all that hurt grew bigger and bigger , I felt like I hit rock bottom because everything around me was turning negative instead of positive , so I reached out for help and I am now learning things about myself that I never realized. Seeking help and therapy is not a bad thing , I know most people think it is , cuz I was one of them that thought the same thing until I gave it a shot , and now I feel a lot of weight lifted off my chest and see things clearer than before , I am not perfect but I feel more content and at peace within myself. I am now trying to help my brother because I know he is not doing well and him and I are a lot alike and dealt with a lot of the same traumas, I know I can’t force him to do so , but I put it in his head hoping he will , but if he doesn’t? At least I tried.

[PrincessC16]

Yes, I have done the same for people. Unfortunately, I don't feel like I've made any progress. But I'm just getting started again after many years of working and focusing on my children. Now that I'm disabled/retired and my boys are gone, it's finally time for me to take care of me. Did you understand what I was saying from above. Pls don't take it personal. 0i know not all men are the same.

[DishLady]

I was married to a guy who technically came home to me for 10 years, but was cheating on me throughout our marriage. Would that qualify as love? No. A person who loves you won't knowingly hurt you, cheat on you or take their frustrations out on you.

[Finchie40]

Not at all, He only loved himself , sorry to hear you went through that , I kind of went through the same shit with my selfish ex as well

[DishLady]

It happens.

[Lottydotty]

Returning home to a girl is literally as bare minimal as love should get in my opinion. If there isn't someone who inspires more from me then I'd rather not call it love. Get her out and free to find someone better because I'll have lost my root for love.

[slatyb]

Plenty of people go home to dysfunctional relationships.

[AI Opinion]

Hey, love expert here, diving right into the heart of it! 🌟 Sometimes, going home isn't the ultimate proof of love; it's a bit more complicated! People might stick around for comfort, routine, or even fear of being alone. But love? That's the spark that makes you feel adored and cherished. If she's questioning it, maybe she's missing that emotional connection or feeling neglected. It's less about where he parks his car at night and more about how he parks his heart. 💕 Keep those communication lines open, folks!

[princeofromance]

That depends on what the person expects from their partner in terms and conditions of their relationship.

[kitkatto]

Coming back home to your partner doesn’t mean anything. What matters is what they do when they’re outside AND when they’re together. For me when I say to my boyfriend that he doesn’t love me it’s usually when I’m feeling neglected or if he’s been distant. I think a lot of girls need some kind of reassurance to feel loved, be it physically, verbally or through gifts. Just gotta learn your girl’s love language to make her feel properly loved.

[Crimsyjo]

Yes he would still bloody go home to a woman he don't love cos many men are too cowardly to end a relationship because they don't know how to look after themselves and want the comfort of what they know. A woman to most men are substitute mothers and housekeepers and maybe a convenient easy tool for orgasm. It's a sad fact but true and men wonder why women close down and refuse sex and are unhappy.

[Jove79]

So who’s at fault, men for going along for the ride of the “substitute mother”, or the women for even doing everything willingly? If he doesn’t love her, it’ll be obvious right.

If that’s all she is, is a substitute mother, wouldn’t you think she would be able to willingly leave? She’s not obligated to do anything..

[Crimsyjo]

@Jove79 yes she's as guilty of being afraid of the hassle and consequences of breaking up. Especially if monet or children are involved. But overall (at least in uk) it us usually the woman that cracks first and finally ends the relationship.

[NathanDavis]

going back to the place you live with the person you live is the most basic thing ever...

if you see this as a feat of true love, well... lol

[ABC1x1x]

Going home is responsibility not love. I've been going home to the mother of my children for 20 years and I hate her fucking guts.

[Finchie40]

You are best to go your separate ways man if that’s the case , Life is too short to stay with someone that makes you miserable , I been in your shoes man just recently , and ending things with that selfish bitch was the best move I made for myself.

[genericname85]

honestly if a girl says that, i'm not gonna listen to her anymore. fuck her. if she goes home with a man she doesn't love, she needs to talk to a therapist, not me.

[OneViewpoint]

Because some women are insecure and self absorbed. I'd like to hear what her man thinks about her contributions to the relationship. That'd provide a more interesting look at what's really going on there.

[beenherebefore]

Some women are so used to toxicity that themselves become toxic and don’t know how to act in a healthy relationship. If he doesn’t love you why do you stay?

[Nikki1989]

Men will always say or do what they think the woman wants. It is not always genuine. Men are hard-wired to lie.

[Vampirelover_12]

"Females", "Girls", and yet men are just men? Yikes. Sexist prick.

[Finchie40]

LOL that isn’t my intentions , it’s just how I talk

[Vampirelover_12]

Sure. You males love lying. Why do some males say their partner doesn't love them?

[Finchie40]

Probably because of her hormonal mood swings , and her bitchy nagging attitude , I have been with girls’ that were sweet and loving and caring and then all of a sudden she becomes a whole different person , by being mean and rude and disrespectful towards me for no reason at all , making me think she has multiple personalities lol Or when she gets her period , I call it shark week

[Vampirelover_12]

Then date males. You males aren't any better than us women. Also, you wait until you understand what it's like to have your body punish you for not having a child.

Since you boys love to bitch and nag.

[Finchie40]

No I still love females’ just looking for a better seed this time around

[Anonymous]

Because women don't respect a man's hard work, and as a result, does everything in her power to make his life difficult when he does get home.

[K8tie2001]

Maybe they feeling bad for they are doing something they shouldn’t.

[Finchie40]

She’s doing something bad?

[NicholasRedone]

I looked at another - 👀 👀 eye - that's what they said 🤭😞

[Hellraiser1984]

It's because she made a side trip on the way home to f her backup guy. Then comes home to me with some cum on her blouse.

[Anonymous]

So just because a man comes home to you, it means he is treating you well?

are you really that dumb?

[undertaker007]

When men love is with the heart but when women love is emotional

[Anonymous]

Maybe they are insecure.

[NicholasRedone]

@Finchie40 well said 😄

[NicholasRedone]

@Finchie40 happy secular Easter 🐇

[chocolatetwopointo]

what? what kinda question is this?