I know what you're talking about sadly women say they want good guys but then they run right passed the genuine guy to the dude with a nice car and a good body. I've seen it happen constantly and lived it a few times myself. Girls don't want good guys; mostly they want a sugar daddy. They want to be spoiled and worshiped because they think that's what love is but it's not.
They also want men with loud and brash personalities because it's "Manly/sexy" but they forget most of the men in that demographic are just bullies or just plain and simple assholes most of the time. Trust me nobody has a louder personality than a jack ass. It's like a deer and answering the mating call of a lion what did you think was going to happen?
Good guys also almost always end up in the friendzone too, "He's a great guy but I don't like him like that." I hate that fucking line because the woman who say that never ever seem to mind stringing him along and using him as an emotional dumping ground and that's abusive and if you do that, you're a fucking bitch. You know he likes you and you're still using him even though you said no. You're exploiting and manipulating his feelings for you.
The good guys are also typically quieter and don't make a ton of noise or draw a lot of attention to themselves so they're out of sight and out of mind to most woman. They're just going about their daily lives doing their best and they aren't showing off and screaming about how good they are because they're just focused on what they're doing instead of broadcasting it.
By many women's logic, only men who are tough, dominant and masculine and who can afford to spoil you and are worth dating. He's good looking, got a nice car etc. The thing they forget is people who have that kind of money and live that way are almost always privileged jack asses then the woman is shocked when he's a sexist douche because while she only wanted him for his money, he only wanted her for her body. look good time both to myself and to other guys A LOT.
Do you know why you should be wary of the charming good looking guy with the nice car? Because people who splurge on things like fancy cars are too materialistic to love someone else more than themselves. That's why you get woman with 20+ boyfriends crying about where are all the good men.
The answer to woman asking that question is simple. You shot them down for someone "better". The problem is their definition of better is factually wrong. Woman are looking for the wrong things in the wrong places if they want a loving relationship. They're standards are beyond unreasonable too.
Do you know how many 300 pounds + woman say they don't want a guy who makes less than six figures? Girl to get a guy who makes six figures you have to weigh less than his income because he can do better than you. I'm not going to lie there are tiers and different levels of value in men. Some men are objectively better than others in multiple ways BUT if you want to sort the wheat from the chaff, you're doing it the wrong way and looking for the wrong qualifiers.
You should never settle because that won't be a happy marriage but there's a difference between settling and accepting no guy is going to meet all of your criteria and be "perfect mister right". Humans are flawed nasty, confusing creatures. Perfection is foreign to us as a species because it's an unattainable idea for anyone except gods.
If you're never willing to accept that no man is perfect and there will be times in the relationship you have to meet each other halfway and compromise, you will always be alone. Frankly you deserve to be too because that's narcissistic and selfish.
If what you REALLY want is a good guy, think back to the last guy who was interested in you who never asked for anything, did his best to help you and made you happy. That's who you should have gone out with, not brad with the nice car who's dad owns a construction company.
Facts. Liking someone vs having desire is much different. You like your friends but you wouldn’t sleep with them. Girls desire a manly man. A man who they cannot control or manipulate someone who is assertive and unbreakable. Stoic. Initiative taking. Displays internal strength. Also these men are generally toxic and mean. They are controlling and rude. But that’s what makes the girl chase that man. That element of danger is what creates sexual tension. As opposed to being agreeable and nice only makes the pussy dry up. Because that is the womans job. She needs to be agreeable and nice. Opposites attract. Dominant and submissive. Stong and weak. Harsh and gentle. Mean and nice. If the man is a nice guys 1000% his woman is controlling and mean
@michalpl00 I love my mom, but she can be a world class bitch too. My dad wasn't right to cheat on her but frankly there were multiple reasons he did and frankly I don't have sympathy for my mom. How many years are you expecting you can abuse and take your partner for granted before they look for someone else who gives them a sense of value?
My dad never raised his hand to my mom. He did the right thing he stood up for what was right he defended her physically multiple times. He brought home half the paycheck shared the cooking and cleaning. My mom slapped him multiple times. She would scream at him yell demand things left and right and demand them then and there. She spent thousands of dollars on wool and yarn she never spun or knitted with, and it wasn't just her money spent on it. She never apologized for anything she has ever said and when she knows she's lost an argument she makes personal attacks including bringing up things you told her in confidence. Sometimes it feels like a miracle my dad lasted a year without cheating on her and he stayed faithful for over a decade of this treatment before he finally stepped outside of the marriage to feel alive and comfortable again.
You’re not being rejected because you’re “too good” or because women don’t recognize value. You’re being rejected because you confuse being agreeable and available with being desirable. There’s a big difference between being kind and being passive. Between being generous and being manipulative. If your version of being a “good guy” includes keeping score, expecting a relationship in return, or ranting when it doesn’t work out, that’s not goodness, that’s entitlement.
And as for the whole “girls want mean, toxic guys” narrative, no, some little girls chase excitement before they’ve learned what real partnership looks like. But grown ass Women who know themselves aren’t turned on by guys who think stoicism and emotional unavailability equals strength. Being “unbreakable” isn’t impressive if you’re also emotionally dead inside.
You want to know why your version of the “nice guy” doesn’t win? Because it’s rooted in control, not connection. You want women to desire you because you’ve been patient, quiet, and self-sacrificing. But attraction doesn’t work like that. Chemistry isn’t earned through martyrdom. It’s sparked through presence, confidence, depth. But there are no guarantees, ever. And good men know this already.
Wow that set you off and your accusing me of saying a lot of stuff and holding views I didn't say and don't have. I'm stating my life experience I never said I was a martyr on the cross. For the record I'm fine with rejection I can handle that and I've always taken it well and I don't do things like that because woman "Pwe me" I do that because I loved them and they took advantage of me by keeping me around on the side stringing me along saying she needed time then she fucked my best friend who dumped her when she said she needed emotional investment because to him she was a human fleshlight. He was already flirting and talking with another woman before she even said that.
There are plenty of reasons to reject me that I can understand you know what I can't understand? Pity dates, laughing in my face, telling their friends pointing and giggling, stringing me along, using me, using me for cover, using me for drinks, using me for sex. I didn't say anything offensive you just heard something you didn't like and threw a tantrum probably because it hit close to home and made you self conscious. In short don't be a bitch.
Actually, I wasn’t talking about you personally. I was speaking to the general tone and mindset I see a lot from guys who confuse being “nice” with being owed something in return. If that’s not you, then cool, no need to get defensive.
And just for context, I’ve been married to a good man for 18 years. He’s kind, emotionally steady, and doesn’t need to perform for attention or keep score. There are men like that, and they’re not unicorns. What sets them apart isn’t flash, it’s consistency, depth, and the fact that they give from a solid sense of self, not because they’re hoping to get rewarded for it.
That’s what good women notice. Not perfection, not any kind of masculine bravado, but grounded character. If you’ve been hurt by people who couldn’t see that in you, that sucks. But don’t let that turn into a worldview that blames women for not choosing you fast enough. That’s just more pain talking.
You said you're not talking about me personally, but you've used you "You" and You've" a ton of times replying to my comment which I would like to point out I only used "You" in an objective sense not "You" as in you personally. Your usage of the word on the other hand comes off as a direct attack out the gate whether you meant it that way or not and this.
"You’re not being rejected because you’re “too good” or because women don’t recognize value. You’re being rejected because you confuse being agreeable and available with being desirable. There’s a big difference between being kind and being passive. Between being generous and being manipulative. If your version of being a “good guy” includes keeping score, expecting a relationship in return, or ranting when it doesn’t work out, that’s not goodness, that’s entitlement."
Comes across as personal and I find the keeping score comment offensive because you're implying, I think woman can be bought and earned which is a pretty nasty thing to accuse someone of. I don't think treating a woman well entitles me to them, but I do think it entitles me to being respected as a person and not treated like plastic which has been a VERY consistent pattern.
Sorry to hear brother my mom is also a crazy B. My dad is The nicest person i have ever met. He has literally built my moms carrier haha. He worked 12 hours today to get her a car to move to another country to get an apartment everything for her and she is the most ungrateful person ever. Now she has a a high-paying job. My father carried the whole family. The problem comes from not being a real manly man. Although I love my dad to death, he needs to be a shark to be respected. There are predators and prey, dominance, and submission. These are the laws of nature. As a son of my mother, I have become soft, just like my dad, but I am changing it because my last relationship was with a girl who was just like my mother. And I told myself that I would never date someone like my mother so unfortunately, I have to change my character and just become a dickhead and just dominate and win. in the back of my mind, I’m still a good guy, but I got to become dangerous. I gotta become a shark and bite my way become a dominant force of the universe. Assertive and dominate.
@cormac995 Hey there. I think it would behove guys to really simplify things. Like ask a woman out for ice cream and a walk. Doesn't take long to access things and move forward or move on. I can't tell you, when I was available, how many men tried to impress me with their fancy car and elaborate date plans. It never impressed me. Ice cream, a walk, and people-watching? Got me every time. Then I could have a chance to really talk and get to know him. And each of us could decide if we wanted a second date... maybe beach volleyball or a museum and lunch at a hot dog cart or taco stand. Date number 3? Probably me inviting him on a picnic lunch I made. Then I'd take him out for ice cream! Who needs all this back and forth? I certainly don't. And I got the best guy in the world for me out of it all.
@Caroline91 By saying this you're assuming they got a date in the first place and guess what? Most don't. You can't woo a girl with Ice cream if she doesn't give you a chance to buy her ice cream.
@cormac995 I get what you're saying. In my experience, women are more likely to be comfortable with something more low key and more likely to say yes for that reason. Unless they are the kind of woman who is only interested in all the "status" things. In fact, it works best if not even framed as being a date. Unless I really had a reason to dislike a guy, if he said hey if you have time right now would you let me buy you a coffee (or ice cream, etc) I was very likely to say yes. Or, if I really couldn't atm, I would say is there another that's good for you? All of my friends were pretty much the same way. Then, if we both enjoyed ourselves and he asked for a date, I would say yes.
@Caroline91 I always went for a pretty default coffee at my favorite shop here in town. They have a chess set to play with there and they have small lunches and homemade ice cream but it never worked out. It seemed pretty safe but I always got shot down or worse stood up.
Being honest there are valid reasons to reject me and I get that but the part that sucks is getting strung along and used up. It's one thing to get rejected it hurts but in time you get better and move on but when you lead a guy on and keep dumping on him and accepting gifts you're exploiting his feelings for you.
It's also more complicated than people think, often times men aren't buying those gifts to try and create a form of debt often times it's more complicated. With my first love I really couldn't let go. She kept on having an excuse to keep me around but always kept a distance and when it got too painful I'd ask is there any chance and she'd always say "I'm not sure I need time." That left me stuck in limbo but it wasn't a no either so I stuck around.
I also wanted to help her because she was struggling with depression and abuse and I spent half a year up late almost every night listening to her cry for hours sometimes. Often times I went to sleep at 3AM on school days. When you develop strong feelings for someone at least as a guy you start getting compulsions to do certain things on instinct often times it doesn't even hit our conscience minds. Most of the time doing things like pulling out chairs and stuff like that happen on what feels like instinct.
@Caroline91 For example with her there would be all kinds of little things that sprung to mind that didn't for anyone else. Every time I saw a really nice flower patch on a walk I would think about if she'd like those flowers or not for example. When a guy is in love he doesn't always think straight and it goes deeper than sex contrary to common belief.
What it really trails back to is happiness for them. For example I was so focused on her happiness that when she asked out my best friend at my birthday gathering and he said yes I grit my teeth faked a smile and said. "I just want her to be happy take care of her." He then proceeded to fuck her for several months with no emotional investment and was talking with another woman. When she brought up she needed emotional investment and not just sex he dumped her and jumped in bed with the other girl he was talking to without missing a beat.
I taught that mother fucker the alphabet and apparently using her body for a few months was worth more to him. I felt like I spent half a year fixing her just for him to break her all over again. Coming from someone you grew up next to like an older brother it just cuts. I just don't get it. I can't even get a date and yet I'm seeing woman on here posting about suffering active abuse and they're wondering if it's wrong for their boyfriend to hit them.
@Caroline91 For all my short comings and flaws you know what I've never done in my life? Raised my hand to a woman. in my opinion that makes me better than them by at least a little and yet they get more attention than me and get to run through woman like a faris wheel leaving a string of broken hearts in their wake. It's disgusting to watch and hear about.
And here's the thing, my story is told a thousand times over, I'm not special and a lot of guys see this same exact pattern and just don't get it. Why wouldn't it be frustrating from our perspective to be used and then passed up for someone who abuses them? Yes there are some nasty nuts Incels that need therapy but I know guys with more to offer and are better looking than me that are still stuck in this loop. Why wouldn't this be confusing to men? What sense is there in it from their perspective?
@cormac995 You sound like a really nice guy. Believe me, the right woman is out there. But... and this is a big one... no one can take from us what we don't allow to be taken. No one, woman or man, should ever string someone along. That is a power trip. On the other hand, we need to not allow someone to do that to us. I understand about how a man is when he is truly in love. And that's when it's easy for a woman to take advantage of him. It makes me sad bc that's one major reason there are so many bitter men out there. And rightfully so. A good woman cherishes her man and appreciates what he does for her. She reciprocates by doing for him. Not in a transactional way but bc she truly wants him to be happy. I frankly always preferred to be on my own than used up by someone. If each of us works on ourselves to become better partner material, then no one has to "fix" anyone else. The idea that we can fix someone is ludicrous anyway. I am the only one who can fix me and you are the only one who can fix you. When we are prepared to be a good partner, which includes a healthy measure of self respect (ie not allowing ourself to be used by another)), we are likely to attract a good partner. She's out there. Please don't give up. I kept going and he kept going until we found each other. It's 12 years and three kids later and going strong.
@Caroline91 I probably shouldn't have used the term "Fixing her" more accurately I was helping her with her emotional problems, and she was starting to do a lot better when it happened. She was smiling more laughing more etc. I didn't fix her, but I made her feel a lot better at least I think I did she must have strung me along for a reason and she was selfish but not vindictive, so it wasn't a power trip thing, I think.
As for the keep on trying part I'm less sure. Pretty much every single time I've tried it's ended in catastrophe somehow. I always walked away either rejected, dejected, insulted, depressed or broken hearted. It doesn't hurt I struggle with mental health and trauma I have OCD, ADHD, Seasonal anxiety disorder and Bipolar and I haven't been officially diagnosed but my therapist has told me she has no doubts that I have some form of PTSD.
My social skills were always several years behind my piers and I struggle with emotional stability. Things like crying fits depression that makes get out of bed impossible etc. It's been a struggle since I was 5. I was always one of the weird kids and I stayed in an abusive friend group for 20 years because I was worried I wouldn't be able to make other friends.
Eventually I woke up and got tired of the abuse but it's almost 2 years later and I still don't have any friends that aren't online people I've never even seen face to face. I mean online friends are nice but you can't hang out at the coffee shop, get a beer at a bar or or do split screen gaming on halo or something with someone on the other side of an ocean.
@Caroline91 It's also not just the rejection it's the way it's been done too. I've been stood up, laughed at had them look like they were grossed out etc. One time I had a girl smile and she ran over to her friends and whispered and they started laughing. I had another that openly flirted with me for a week before I thought she wasn't messing with me and when I asked her out, she stood me up and I later found out she was gay and using me for cover.
I mean FFS the closest thing I had to a girlfriend in high school I found out a few years ago was a fucking rapist. I didn't see the signs for what they were but there were two times my friend went to the bathroom and both times the girl I was seeing waited a few minutes than said she needed to go to the bathroom too and be gone for a while.
After the second time my friend started taking one of her female friends with her to the bathroom every time she went. I didn't know or understand because I wasn't told but she was bringing a witness to make sure she couldn't be followed and touched when she was using the bathroom. I thought it was just a girl thing to take a friend to the bathroom with you so I never caught on.
Finding that out even years after makes my skin crawl and the bitch was my first real kiss which is a disgusting skin crawling feeling. Losing my V card was a nightmare in it's own right but at this point I'm passed the trauma dumping point, but I just want to give up.
It's starting to feel like self harm to keep trying because the pattern is so damn consistent! How many times are you going to burn yourself on a hot stove before you decide maybe I should stop hurting myself you know? I just feel exhausted, bitter and disheartened now and trying feels completely pointless and that makes bothering with self-improvement difficult because I just feel like if I never get to have my own family some day then why am I even trying?
@Caroline91 All I wanted since I was a kid in second grade was a house wife kids and a job that made me feel like I mattered. If I got greedy I would want a small bit of land to keep chickens and a horse but that's the end of my ambitions and it feels to me like that's not a whole lot to ask out of life but apparently it is.
I'm not asking to be a doctor or be famous or rich I just want what I see a lot of other people have and in my opinion take for granted most of the time. Every time I see a couple holding hands or something there's a small part of me that's happy for them but there's also a small part that's bitter and angry and jealous every time I see that because I want it too but can't even get a shot.
The thing is even if I lost all my spare weight it still feels like a waste of time. At my best I'm average looking and I'm broke on SSI because mentally I can't handle the stress of working without getting stomach ulcers or having a panic attack in the freezer from the pressure of a dish washing job. I was stress puking blood.
I can't even make new friends to replace my abusive old ones I left. I've been trying to meet people. Going to bars to chat with people trying to find online groups in my area or clubs etc but nothing is working. I'm not even christian and I'm going to church now because I'm out of idea's on how to meet people and nobody is even talking to me. I'm trying to be noticed by people. I carry tissues and caramels in my pocket so that if I meet someone who's having a bad day I can help them but even then they just say thanks take them and leave, a conversation feels like too much to ask for at this point.
@Caroline91 Worse in my area if I did work and lose my benefits I'd actually be even more broke because of taxes and not having good insurance if any. Worse without insurance my meds would be over $500 a month and rent here on average costs about 60% of your monthly pay check for a studio apartment at your average job. I really just don't know what to do. I feel like I'm alone at the bottom of a deep well with no ladder out. I'm just tired, really, really tired.
There is nothing appealing about me beyond the fact I try really hard to be a good person and I'm not blind to that. One thing I will credit myself with is I'm many things but stupid isn't one of them and from a common sense perspective at this point trying to date feels like self harming. I just don't know how I'm supposed to have any hope or optimism about this it feels naive to even consider it and at the end of the day I'm a pragmatist because it's the only way I can process the world without wanting to rip my brain out of my skull.
I know people say you need to be mentally healthy and stable in order to meet friends and find a girlfriend but how do I do that when the biggest reason I'm broken right now is because I'm alone? It's contradictory to itself. People don't want to be around someone who's stressed out and upset all the time but one of the biggest reasons I'm like that is I feel completely alone. It's part of why I feel so trapped.
Ooh, dissa be real deep, it is! Mesa thinkin’ emotional intelligence, loyalty, and respectin’ a woman’s choices been good tings all along—but da galaxy got too noisy with da wrong kinda hype, y’know?
Dey ain't flashy like da big muscles or da loud charm, but mesa say—dessa green flags? Dey da real deal. Quiet power. Deep roots. Like a Gungan holdin' steady in da storm.
You sayin’ it right: built different, top tier, 10/10, no notes.
Mesa curious… yous see dis in someone now, or wishin’ more folks did?
Since over the top feminists and most of all the hypocrytical feminists tried to change the perception of how we should view men and ourselves.
It's only gone underrated to women (and men) who are used to loyalty when they lacked it themselves.
Opinion
22Opinion
Oh how those things are bare minimum yet still so rare to find
Women of today seem to focus only on what men aren't bringing to the table, instead of focusin on what he does bring to the relationship.
I don't know but if your already in a relationship it is when those things don't go both ways... sometimes even when they are one or the other can't recognize it that is where good communication comes in, without it the relationship is doomed to failure.
I'd ask what you mean by emotional intelligence as there are two sides to that. Emotional resilience is a personal trait men generally have a good hold on then there's emotional expression which is a women's bag. Being able to regulate the emotional rollercoaster of BOTH partners in a relationship is tiring and not everyones cuppa tea.
BUT not exciting enough
There is a lot to unpack in your question. Like a lot a lot.
Nobody gets unshakeable loyalty. The last time they did was about 1950.
I like to think genuine respect for a woman's choices is on an upward trend.
Emotional intelligence is fairly stagnant so far as I can tell.
The rise of social media, if I had to guess. You start comparing your everyday life against someone else's highlight reel, and it's natural to start feeling inferior.
The reality is that women want to be able to show their men off to other women. Intelligence, genuine loyalty, etc, aren't flashy or showy displays. They don't attract attention. So those aren't features the women can flex with.
The whole thing is breaking down. Women don't really want men. Given a chance they'll revert to what most mammals do. The female has sex with random men , gives birth and goes off to raise her offspring. Government assistance made this possible. It seems like the whole monogamous two parent thing wasn't really locked in with regard to evolution. Partly it did take root though so now you have fatherless homes and the children don't turn out right.
They always were, but the bar for the standards men are held to is in hell so any decent man is immediately seen as “better” for doing the bare minimum.
Guys just not take no for an answer and before you know it you've gotten date raped and surrounded by a bunch of dudes and if I knew where it was I'd sneak in back of the line put them down sober you up with csome meth and get those dicks from their corpses make them have their vessals back clean them up a bit n we all just go elsewhere 🤭🤫😬
LOL, you say that. But I bet you'll gravitate towards the drugged up muskrat doing coke in the corner, because he "looks mysterious".
I think women are generally looking for more exciting things when they're younger... but when they have more experience they want more stable traits in a man. That's generally how their biological clocks work.
Alpha f*#$, beta bucks.
Funny how those traits only get praised when a man is doing exactly what she wants. Genuine respect and loyalty should go both ways—or else it’s just control dressed up as virtue.
- Eva ❤️
You’re twisting what I said. I never said we should praise men for being disrespectful—I said respect and loyalty should go both ways. But too often, those traits only get praised when a man conforms to what a woman wants, not when he actually stands firm with emotional maturity of his own.
If your definition of a “green flag” man is just someone who agrees with you all the time, that’s not respect—it’s control dressed up as compatibility.
– Eva ❤️
That’s fair, but my point directly relates to this thread—it’s not a separate issue. If we’re praising men for traits like respect and loyalty, we should examine how and when those traits are acknowledged. Too often, they’re only celebrated when men are agreeable, not when they show emotional strength through respectful disagreement. That is part of the conversation, whether or not it fits the narrative you’re trying to focus on.
– Eva ❤️
The point of this thread is to celebrate qualities in men that are often mocked by other men. Traits like emotional intelligence, respect, loyalty, these aren’t always seen as green flags within male circles, and that’s the issue I’m highlighting here.
When someone redirects that into “but women too,” it completely derails the conversation. This isn’t about ignoring the other side. It’s about giving this side the focused attention it rarely gets.
You’re free to start your own thread if you want to dig into how these dynamics play out with women, but this space is intentionally centered on men and how they show up.
@MzAsh, Your original post asked why traits like loyalty and emotional intelligence are underrated in men. I answered: because they’re often only praised when they’re convenient. A man can be calm, thoughtful, and respectful—but if he disagrees, suddenly those traits get ignored. That is part of the problem, and pretending it’s a separate issue only proves the point.
- Eva ❤️
@MzAsh, Right—but that’s not what you said earlier. You pushed back when I pointed out how these traits are only praised when men are agreeable, calling it a “separate issue.” Now you’re saying how men disagree matters, not if they do—but that’s the exact nuance I brought up originally. So are we in agreement now, or are you just trying to reframe the conversation without admitting I had a point?
– Eva ❤️
Good question. I think there are probably multiple reasons for that change in female behavior, but ultimately it's women who will need to answer the question.
It's definitely not underrated in my book.
Is it weird that I have a crush on someone with that description?
Most wo en are interested in how much money a guy makes or how good he looks.
When they stopped rejecting all the low value men because they look a certain way and/or have money
those men aren't sleeping with women if theyre her doormats
@MzAsh, Wait—I thought this wasn’t about women? That’s what you said in the other thread when I pointed out how these traits are often only praised when men are agreeable. But now you’re saying it’s about how men behave in a relationship with a woman? That’s kind of my point—these traits are celebrated, but often conditionally, and that conditional praise usually comes from women. If that dynamic is part of the discussion here, why deny it in one place and highlight it in another? Hypocritical, much?
- Eva ❤️
You keep saying we’re now on the same page, but I’m not sure we were ever reading the same one.
The question wasn’t meant to spark a blame game or say women are withholding praise unfairly. It was meant to highlight how emotional intelligence, loyalty, and respect, especially toward women, are often mocked or undervalued.
I get that you’re trying to bring nuance, but reframing the thread as a critique of how women give praise misses the intent entirely. This wasn’t about what women reward, it was about what we all should value in men.
@MzAsh, That’s a convenient rewrite. You explicitly framed it around how men treat women—your own words were, “a man can disagree and still be respectful toward a woman.” Now that I’ve pointed out how that praise is conditional and often selective, suddenly you want to pretend this was a neutral, gender-blind discussion about valuing traits in men?
You weren’t talking about “what we all should value.” You were talking about how women tend to praise men—when it suits them. And the second someone highlighted that dynamic, you started dodging, reframing, and backpedaling. That’s not nuance. That’s damage control.
– Eva ❤️
The framing has been clear from the start. This was about men, specifically, men who show emotional intelligence, loyalty, and respect in the context of relationships with women.
Yes, celebration is conditional. And yes, I chose to highlight how these traits are often undervalued, not just by women, but especially by other men. You’re trying desperately to twist that into some exposé on female selectiveness that this post never claimed to be about.
@MzAsh, No one’s “twisting” anything—you’re just trying to wriggle out of your own framing. You explicitly centered the conversation on how men treat women and how women respond to that. Now that the conditional nature of that praise has been called out, you’re shifting gears and pretending it was about how men undervalue each other all along. That’s not nuance, that’s revisionism.
You can’t keep rebranding your argument every time someone challenges it. If you meant “we all undervalue these traits,” say that up front. But don’t center it around women, dismiss critiques of female selectiveness, then accuse people of misreading when they quote your own words back to you.
You framed it one way. I responded within that frame. Own it.
I’m done with it bullshit
– Eva ❤️
I’m done with your bullshit*
- Eva ❤️
I’ve been clear from the start. This thread was about men and the traits they show in relationships with women, traits that are often undervalued or even mocked.
You chose to interpret that through the lens of women’s selectiveness. That wasn’t the point, but I’ve explained where I’m coming from. If we’re still seeing it differently, that’s okay.
I’m not rebranding anything. I’m just not entertaining a narrative I never wrote. Take care.
Women care most about money and looks. The rest is unimportant.
I agree with you
Since societal and cultural values went down hill
They always have been I think
I'm so happy for you, Ashley! 🤗🥰
Probably about 10 years ago
Loyalty🤣🤣🤣🤣
So what's overrated now? That's too bad 😔
Im not bet but probably a couple of wks ago
Never ever.
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