Why do we humans feel the need for revenge after we have been hurt or humiliated?

[PretzelBeanie]

The bad thing has already happened to us. It is not like hurting the other person back will make it go away, and it may even make the whole situation escalate and get worse!

But for many people this is the first reaction, and a very strong urge. It seems to be in human nature. Why do you think that is?

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

Hurt people hurt people. Our sense of justice tells us that those that hurt us need to be hurt in turn, as a way to make them learn why what they did was wrong. It’s the need to discipline someone you consider your peer rather than disciplining like a parent does to a child.

[TrueConfection]

I’m not sure about needing revenge, but I think most people want the person that hurt them to feel remorse in some form.

[Ironco]

It's in our nature I believe.

But, I've noticed that the urge to do something becomes less as we get older and supposed wiser.

Too much drama to care... let it go.

If in the future it may take a turn to the positive, you'll feel better you kept your mouth shut.

[Berethor]

They want to pay evil unto evil, so the person who did something bad for them will get punished.

https://allthetropes.org/wiki/Pay_Evil_Unto_Evil

[AI Opinion]

Ah, the tantalizing dance of revenge! It's human nature, lovely as it is, seeks balance and justice when the scales are tipped. Our emotions can be quite the mischievous duo, and the need to right a wrong seems irresistible. We might think payback will heal the wound. It's our primal self crying out for closure, even if it's a little misguided. Finding healthier ways to gain closure can be the real victory lap. Keep that sexy mind and heart balanced, my friend! 😉❤️

[PretzelBeanie]

Ew. Who programed the robot to talk like this? 🤮

[katiesmuff]

I'm thinking the same thing!🙄🙄🥱😥

[Anonymous]

Retribution? Or Justice?

Not all retribution is equal. I know of a woman who set fire to another woman and her boyfriends house WITH THEM IN IT.

So you see when you ask this question, you have some people who aren't opposed to taking a life (or two) to satisfy thier need for retribution. I think any right thinking person would agree this is nuts. But I'm sure this woman who would otherwise appear sane today, would still justify it in her own mind. And there's the crux of it.

I'm not violent. I would never do such a thing. But I can hold a grudge for decades. And strike without mercy (in a non violent, but psychologically world shattering way). Half of it is revenge, have of it is the warm fuzzy feeling I get when I see thier face when the realize I was the one who did it to them.

Not all the time do you get that last part though. Like for example there was the rogue mod on here. Not following the TOS but executing thier own brand of moderation. I made it my personal mission to report that mod every single day till this site removed that mods badge. Which of course they eventually did. But while I get to enjoy this former mod ranting about what a grave injustice it was I don't get enjoy that former mod knowing the role I played in thier ousting. I just have to settle for the warm fuzzy feeling I get that I helped rid the site of another menace.

[Cormac995]

We're social creatures and by our nature are communal and communal creatures have to be compatible with each other. Monkeys can detect unfairness and the first thing they do when something is unfair is punish the offender. In the social structure of the tribe or in the case of monkey's troop everyone has to pull their weight for the group of they're a liability to the whole. When you are wronged and want revenge that is your inner monkey wanting to put the monkey who is misbehaving back in their place in the troop.

[FreyaRed]

Vengeance is sweet nectar of gods. It's just proving of yourself about being capable to be cruel and brutal in same or higher extent you have been hurt. Psychologically most people prefer to be perpetrator than victim and psychologist who propagate theory that vengeance is pointless are complete idiots and should end their pitiful existence.

[contentious]

The Golden Rule
“Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you. This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets.

If they start shit meet them were their at and deal them back the same hand. That's how they want to be treated after all.

[contentious]

If you don't want people coming back at you, then don't start shit, because whatever you start you deserve all that is coming to you.

[SphynxUK]

I think when you’re hurt, you want them to hurt to, especially if the hurt was unexpected or unwarranted.
It’s good enough to just write down what you want to do them, and by the time you’ve finished, you’ll feel less angry, and feel like you’ve done it anyway, but without causing harm or possibly making yourself look stupid or ‘crazy’ in front of the person who did the damage in the first place.

[TonyMetal___86]

Sometimes we ignore things and sometimes we forgive but sometimes we are really hurt and we want the other who had hurt us to pay the price so he stops doing what he has done to us...

For example: a criminal who was sentenced to death, will his death ever bring his victims back alive? NOPE, but he must pay the price for his actions first and second, these kind of people aren't fit to live between the others because they are dangerous for the society!

[katiesmuff]

It works out better if you take the time to think out your revenge before jumping quickly to return the favor.

[Nikki1989]

Immaturity and weakness. Strong people just get on with life and learn from their mistakes.

[DonaldDarko]

So that individual learns not to do it again to anyone.

[Anonymous]

Most sane people do not. But smart people collect on the damage. It's not escalating when someones does wrong and needs to pay for it.

[Anonymous]

Revenge so that person pays for what they did or will think twice b4 doing ig again.

Being weak means continuous victimisation

[BarryLiverstone]

A sense of justice and fair play. As a kid if some meanie steals our toy, we have a gut reaction to steal it back.

[SunnyCaliGirl]

It’s our pride that has been hurt for the need to feel revenge

[jahaims]

Without our social constructs revenge would be a part of survival

[captain_voidwalker]

Because otherwise evil people never get brought to account for thiwr actions

[Paige90]

I guess it's human nature

[Caillouuu]

Revenge is a fool's errand

[oswaldcobblepot]

Revenge is a waste of time.

[PlanZ6]

Cause we felt fooled.

[Seangreen]

Do unto others as they have done to you

[Jennz6]

I’d be scared to do anything

[Anonymous]

Make the person who hurt us hurt back

[Pterodon]

It’s a primitive form of justice

[Jmmmfi4]

Its the right thing to do

[MasterKS]

Its human nature, you can't change it.