My girlfriend doesn't call me by my pet name anymore?

[Anonymous]

The girlfriend and I are going through some problems - so I am moving out. Now she doesn't call me baby, honey or sweetie anymore. Just by my first name. Like I got her a gift and she just says Thank you [my name]. Which is weird. She still kisses me.

Updates

+1 y

The question is, since our relationship is having some issues, is this a bad thing or nothing to worry about? If your one and only started referring to you only by you first name when they previously called you a pet name, should that be because for alarm?

[Seafew]

If you still love her and want to be with her just act calm and as if it does not phase you. She is seeing how it feels to be a little more distant from you. If you act confident she will regain her natural ways of calling you your pet names. Call her by her first name now and then... play the game but don't let her get too distant. Call her; her favorite pet names to pull her back in. It's a push/pull kind of game.

Alarm level = Risk
She is seeing how it feels to slightly push away from you
Stay confident and she should be back to her normal ways soon. (Be the man she thought you were)

At worst, if you let things go out of control you will break up and likely find another lady to love.
How it all ends up is down to the decisions you make and how much you know your honeybunny.

- Sean E (Seafew)

[Anonymous]

If she doesn't respect you, move the f*** out bro and find someone who does. I can't stand negative bitches who treat their men like sh*t. Lot of those these days thinking they are way better than they really are.

[Asker]

Yeah, I'm moving out. She tried to pitch her girlfriend's room to me to take (expensive). I almost took a room from a yoga instructor and dancer. At the same time its tough too, you know?

[Opinion Owner]

Oh hell yeah I know. But it's a chance for you to be happier, because she fails you and most likely will keep failing you. And it sucks you have to throw the good part of her together with the bad. But, there is a line, and she obviously crossed it times and again. That means she put herself way before you and doesn't work on building a happiness for you both. You deserve better, and someone respecting you and eager to work with you. But It's hard, and it hurts.

[MWalsh89]

Means she's frustrated/moved out of the honeymoon phase. Sounds like a need for a sit down, discuss your problems calmly, find that little spark. Let her vent her issues to you, because sometimes that's all it takes. Let her know you still love her, but don't be pushy, she needs a little space to get over possibly some hurt, not soley your fault, but any type of argument, even when it's mostly the hurting person's fault, causes hurt. She needs time to think, to breath. Don't run away, be there, but do give her some sort of space.

[Asker]

We've discuss this a number of times and been together for years. She knows how I feel and I know how she feels. Basically she wants me to move out to give her space and allowing me to be more independent. I want to move out because of her chronic nagging and anger issues. In the end, she's sad we might drift away, gets jealous about who I am staying with, etc. Yet she is secretive about texts she sends, doesn't call me pet names but wants me to still rub her neck and stuff?

[MWalsh89]

In that case, it sounds like she's confused and with being together so long, has a hard time comprehending you two being apart. You might have to consider taking a break from each other, more so than just moving out and the fact that it was her suggesting you to move out, is something to worry about. Perhaps you should take a break.

[Asker]

Is it a break a good thing? I personally feel a break will separate us even more. I mean me moving out I anticipated being a temp. Like she wanted me to find a furnished place for a few months. I thought I'd take everything with in case it became permanent - now she's wondering about me taking my bed because her friend moving in at May.

[SkinnyG]

If you're moving out, I would say THAT"S something to worry about. By not calling you the usual pet names, she sounds like she's trying to stay a little distant, not knowing what the future will bring .

[Asker]

She still kisses me and asks if we can hang out and stuff. She was concerned I was moving too far away and her friend has a room open she wanted me to consider (which I didn't).

[f0xxy]

Well first things first, what exactly are the issues your going through? And how long has this been going for?

[Asker]

It's an on-going thing. We live together and decided I am going to move out because she doesn't respect me or needs me to find my independence or something like that. I am moving out because of her anger issues - she gets angry fast and about worthless stuff. We've discuss all this and she's basically resentful of me. She says she loves me and doesn't want to break up but... I don't know, we're not as affection to each other.

[Asker]

The thought is by me moving out (her thought not mine) she can gain appreciation for me. My thought is that I am tired of her nagging and putting me down - so I can do my own thing now. She says she'll miss me and stuff but the moving part isn't a good sign to me. She tells me she thinks it will be good for us - which I don't think is a positive. However, sometimes you have to take steps backwards to move forward. Yet, she forward me her friend's open room wanting me to rent it?

[f0xxy]

Ahh.. What are the examples of what she gets mad about? Have you asked her why she is resentful of you? Because once your partner says they feel resentment to you - you'll have to get to the bottom of the problem before it festers into bigger problems.

[Asker]

Like making break dough. Or the way I drive (too slow). Or if I am fixing something that I am doing it wrong or why isn't it done - even though I fix it and comes out great. She's resentful towards me for a number of reasons but she says mostly because she feels I'm not independent. She owns the house and makes 6 figures (which I make a decent salary but not as much as her).

[f0xxy]

I'm sorry. But seriously? There are bigger problems in relationships than driving too slow! Dude - you have a job - how can she not appreciate that you at least work? Actually, she doesn't seem to appreciate you at all to be honest - she seems blinded.

How long have you guys been together? And has it always been like this?

[Asker]

About 3 years. No, she was sweet and awesome. My previous job ended and I was going to my home state but we talked about it and then moving in together and I agreed to stay. We got a place, I did some freelance work for a few months (which went okay), we went house looking together and she wanted to get a place and then got a pretty good job.

I clean up the place well, helped her negotiate a good price on the house

[Asker]

I'm the one that tells her things we can't do (like have a dog) because it will ruin the custom flooring or doing x to the walls because it will damage it. But she kinda does what she wants.

[f0xxy]

As long as you are doing your part, she should understand. I have no idea why she is getting mad at you - because she seems to be making issues out of thin air.

Have you ever brought up this issue to her before?

[Asker]

Yes - her anger/impatience is a reason I want to move out. We've discussed it. It's the only thing I ever asked her to work on. She says she tries, she really tries she says but doesn't know if she can do it. I think she's a little spoiled, she was able to buy the place with her the trust fund her daddy gave her. Don't get me wrong, if you meet her she's the sweetest, wholesome, down to earth person you'd ever meet. But lately she's been mean. She thinks some time apart - my indepedence

[Asker]

her missing me might solve it. That she needs to respectful me to not get angry at me. I guess I am kinda a p**** when we fight - like I don't fight back when sh*t breaks or in the car. It doesn't seem worth it and then I started pushing back hard - I don't think she liked that.

[-Darling]

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww... its OK I guess just give her a little space, still be sweet to her but don't be naggy :p

[-Darling]

NO I wouldn't worry about it. Every relationship have its ups and downs, sounds like youve been togheter for a while, I don't think she would let you go that easly. Talk to her about it if you want and ask what it is that is bothering her that you don't know about

[Asker]

We've talked about it. Been together for years but I'm moving out now. It just seems weird and something to be concerned for...

[-Darling]

Not knowing what the arguments about I can't help ya Mr

[Asker]

It's an on-going thing. We live together and decided I am going to move out because she doesn't respect me or needs me to find my independence or something like that. I am moving out because of her anger issues - she gets angry fast and about worthless stuff. We've discuss all this and she's basically resentful of me. She says she loves me and doesn't want to break up but... I don't know, we're not as affection to each other.

[Asker]

She thinks me moving out will give her space to be happy and all that and let me be independent and in the end can love each other more ('if you love them set them free if they come back then its meant to be'). I've been distant to her and it bothers her. Yet she isn't affectionate toward me (calling me pet names or rubbing my legs, etc). So is this a sign on where the relationship is going or just temp?

[Klaatu51]

that means nothing... she doesn't have to cll you baby and honey always LOL

[ShootingStar5]

And your question is...?

[ShootingStar5]

I agree with SkinnyG. If you guys are having big enough problems to because you to move out, that should be your biggest clue that something is wrong. How is your communication? What problems caused you to move out? Do you both want to try to work on those problems? Yes you should definitely be concerned, but that doesn't mean you might not be able to fix things. You really need to talk to each other and get down to the bottom of your problems if you want to work things out.

[Asker]

Yes, we've discussed this quite often. It comes down to she is resentful towards me and stems from her not having respect for me and wants to see me be independent. My problem toward her is that she is impulsive and has intense anger problems (no patience whosoever). Things have to be done NOW! She thought if things weren't getting better (I made the adjustments, worked on what needed to be done and she didn't) maybe some time apart would be good. I want to go because of her nagging.

[Asker]

The thought is by me moving out (her thought not mine) she can gain appreciation for me. My thought is that I am tired of her nagging and putting me down - so I can do my own thing now. She says she'll miss me and stuff but the moving part isn't a good sign to me. She tells me she thinks it will be good for us - which I don't think is a positive. However, sometimes you have to take steps backwards to move forward. Yet, she forward me her friend's open room wanting me to rent it?