The side effects of being too straight forward

[Shezadi]

I am a super straight forward person. I say what I think and what I feel. However, lately I realised that this world doesn't really appreciate your honesty and transparency because let's be very honest here, honesty involves criticism and humans by nature don't take criticism very well. Being too straight forward can put you in danger especially if the person in front of you is let's say short tempered and aggressive. It might even lead to a physical fight just because you were too honest about your feelings for someone. Personally, if I feel hurt by somebody's actions, I believe in letting that person know, how I feel about his actions, how his actions are affecting me, what impacts they are having on me, what it makes me feel like, but I am too naive to understand that he might not appreciate my honesty. Instead of listening, he might end up becoming defensive. He might take it the wrong way.

He might take it as a personal attack or me bossing him around when really I just wanted to let him know how his actions are affecting me, in the hope, he might reflect upon his actions and do something about them. And how naive am I to even such great expectations.

Whenever, I tried doing that, it didn't work. In fact, it went HORRIBLY wrong. It only made things WORSE because that person turned into an EGO issue instead of being compassionate. In the end, I felt like an idiot for even expecting positive results from a conversation. In the end, my conclusion is that not everybody can be reasoned with. I wish people could be reasoned with but you know what, EGO gets in the way. EGO prevents logical and rational thinking.

Therefore, EGO is an enemy of humanity because humanity comes from the death of human ego. EGO prevents COMPASSION. And to lighten up, we have to kill our EGOS, only then COMPASSION will enter our heart, it will light up our hearts, it will turn us into the best listeners, who listen with compassion, and REALLY care about others feel, and that's when people will learn to talk things out instead of turning everything into a battle like humans did since the day Adam was created. And this bloodshed was what the angels feared when god was creating Adam.

[lightbulb27]

Very well explained. Ego in a way is like a barrier that protects the person from change. In effect, a hardened shell.

sometimes it is how information is delivered. Delivering with compassion can help... but then again, Jesus did a great job of that and he wrote the parable of the sower and seeds. It's just not easy to get past that wounded ego.

And thus a conclusion I came to a while back... that "the wounds", for lack of a better word... are in control in humanity. We are emotionally fallen and keep passing those wounds onto others and cycle repeats. Reaching the heart is not easy when has defenses it must discern..."the knowledge of good and evil!"

[Shezadi]

I agree on the cycle bit because abuse is a cycle, which can be passed on from generation to another, and cycle might repeat itself for thousands of years until someone is brave enough to break this cycle but then humans would have been angels. We are overcome by emotions, which prevent rational and logical thinking. We are very emotional, and being too emotional, sometimes makes us self-centered and self-absorbed but that's just life. That's just human nature.

[lightbulb27]

very wise for your age. Exactly what's going on. We are fallen... into emotional states other than love... shame, fear, malice, greed, etc.. That's the problem...:) Jesus planted the seeds to fix, but it is one "weedy garden" of hurt humans.

[Shezadi]

Yeah

[Jjpayne]

It's sad be true sometimes... However, I feel that each person is not a cookie cutter and needs to be approached differently at times, some need space, some need fewer words and firmness, others need more words and sensitivity. It's all about how the person reacts... Overall sometimes all you can do is same your peace and that's the best you can do. I do like your ending a lot here by the way

[Shezadi]

"I do like your ending a lot here by the way"
LOL!
I mean thank you!

[Jjpayne]

The last two paragraphs were a nice finish

[Jjpayne]

Thank you! :)

[Shezadi]

welcome

[DeeDeeDeVour]

Some of my friends & relatives claimed that I've hurt their feelings because I'm too straight forward. They later express their gratitude to me for being that way to them.

[Shezadi]

Thanks for sharing the experience.

[kbharadwaj3125]

Yes. The problem is that you want change form you man. He doesn't want your harsh words. Words arranged differently can simply change the situation.. EGO is sure dangerous. But hurting words are also damaging.

[Anonymous]

Matthew 10:22
you shall be hated by all men for my names sake
but he that endures until the end shall be saved

GOD IS 100% HONEST AND SO MANY PEOPLE HATE HIM

it comes with the package

[Shezadi]

true

[PetrovaFire92]

Yeah, I shouldn't have to sugar code what I say.. or be an still be nice about it.

[Shezadi]

EXACTLY! Calling a spade a spade!

[JimboGB]

Beautifully put. Wisdom is found only in truth and truth never damages a cause that is just.

[Shezadi]

FACTS!

[Sevenpointfive]

you can't assume everyone has the capability of being dishonest. i can lie but i don't like to reinforce actions that are unhealthy

[NewZion]

Side effect: People get butt-hurt.

Me: I don't give a shit. Not about to start blowing sunshine up people's asses.

[sonoooo789]

Very little side effects , but so many right effect... human should be straight forward.

[yenofed840]

straight forward people do not live in fake world where people are not ready to listen truth

[rightone]

I don't know I'm truthful I'm outgoing I'm straight to the point no line I know you know I might hurt their feelings I'm an honest guy

[alance99]

I am also very straight forward

[Shezadi]

That's why we are friends.

[ItsTheNephilim]

Nicely put.