Search Results: he wants to take it really slow

I think she said it beautifully.

It’s that anyone MUST initiate. But rather, to wait just for the sake of waiting. For permission. To live. Is detrimental.

“Q : How do I ask a guy out on a date?

A : Did you know, that when it comes to psychology, when you say to someone you’re attracted to them, this increases their curiosity to you and even gets them thinking you’re attractive. It can, if the person sees you attractive already at an unconscious level, get him to start thinking of dating you.

Did you also know, that most men, the confident ones, whether it’s a bad boy or someone who is just confident guy, will be very impressed by you asking him out.

Did you also know, that you can tell if the persons values, the world is positive or stinks, shallow, by asking them out on a date. If that person who is a friend or someone you just met starts acting weird, ignores you, this tells you a lot about how deep down, they are not really good person. They judge people a lot, they are shallow.

A person who takes it as a compliment, even if they say they are not interested will be nice to you, and when you see them again, they’ll be looking forward to saying hello to you. That shows they have goodness inside them and they feel a lot of empathy.

Did you also know…the experienenced, confident guys or guys who have never dated, like open communication. They don’t like the games, the hints. Many guys are like that anyways.

When you say it, it is a relief for them because they know you’re not into the mind games, you’re not insecure and you are sincere.

Did you also know, you’re not the only one attracted to the guy.

There are women who are and so, if you don’t make the move then you make it possible and increase the chance to 95% that the other, whoever she is, who asks him out, gets the guy.

Did you also know, whenever you don’t take action on something or someone you want, your growth is slowed down. You’re not learning, growing in confidence. “

CONTINUED* 👇🏽

So I was kicked out of a group for exposing a man and people felt that I was “bitter” and called me “crazy” for speaking my truth on this man. It was a very invalidating experience.

Let me be clear on why I’m exposing him…

1. He did not respect my boundaries when it came to having sex and ended trying to use manipulation. I made it clear to him before we exchanged numbers that I wasn’t in a space to have sex or be in a relationship. He kind of wanted to know why etc and he wasn’t pushy.. but he said things he felt I NEEDED to hear… and at first I’m thinking wow maybe he is genuine and understanding. Looking back it was hard to see his “coercive behavior…” to get what he wanted and wanted to gain my trust. Even saying how can I make you feel safe

2. Subtle changes in behavior after telling him that I wanted to take things slow with him and gaslighting.. I did end up liking him and when I said that… that’s when it started taking hours for him to respond and then it went to days… only to get a “sorry really busy”…. But it kept happening and I confronted him and he tried to say that I needed to “heal”….. but it was strange behavior coming from a man who was trying to make me feel “safe” initially…

3. Disrespect… (devalue/discard) everything was cool on the date at first but then he became disrespectful and rude… he started asking when I last had sex, dildos, negging behavior and some insults.

4. Not being honest about his real name even on the date.. I asked him if “Craig” was his real name and he said yes… I get you want to protect yourself but he really did not want to tell me his name and seemed annoyed when I asked. It was very fishy

5. After the “date” i tried finding a “gf”…. Bc i felt like he was talking to someone.. he has no social media presence and keeps things private

6. He is possibly bisexual or closeted based on some things I found

I had a fling with someone two years ago. He was quiet afterwards and it felt so uncomfortable I had to ask him why.. he said the sex we had was the best he’s ever had. I just took it as he was just saying things to say it. He soon after started professing how he feels..”I want a relationship, I could really see us settling down” etc. I pretty much sabotaged it on purpose because I wasn’t looking for anything serious. He was mad that I was seeing other men. (Back then) -/ fast forward to now, I messaged him to ask if he wanted to have sex? He said yes, so we exchanged numbers and set up a time and day. The day comes and he’s slow to respond to me, he’s not a responsive as he’s been over the course of us reconnecting.. I made plans with someone else. The next day he asks what I did the day before and I told him “I went to go see someone” and it pissed him off to the point where all we did was argue. by the way -/ he’s in a relationship with his baby’s mother (new born) and they live together, I am single. so we’ve argued for like 3 weeks until he finally agreed to see me last Tuesday and we had sex at his job. He’s extremely dry with me after so it started to irritate me to the point I told him “you’re only making me not like you and I can’t wait until I do” so I sent him our Se’x tapes and told him if that’s how I have to remember him, it’s how he gotta remember me (called him names) and he said “you’re way too much for me💯 it’s not attractive” — what I’m confused on is why is trying to impose how he feel and what he wants on me, when all I ever wanted was to have sex? Like the first time we’ve met. That’s all, I didn’t have no attraction to him outside of intercourse. Why is he behaving the way he is when I just started caring more (I didn’t care at first) and now we said some things to eachother that’s hurtful and we both blocked eachother. Like what is the reason for all of this? Am I wrong?