Search Results: he has changed

I grew up with a narcissistic father and later spent five years married to a narcissistic partner. After living through that, I can recognize those patterns instantly. I’ve learned how their dynamics work — what to avoid saying, how to respond, and even how tone and body language can shift the interaction. Their tactics are sophisticated, and surviving them taught me a lot about how to protect myself.

I don’t use those skills to control people, and honestly, the idea of having that kind of influence makes me uneasy. But when I realize I’m dealing with someone who’s using manipulative behavior, I know how to hold my ground and not get pulled into their games. It’s empowering to know I’m no longer an easy target, even if the whole thing feels complicated at times.

A close friend of mine, who works in mental health and also has NPD, once gave me the best advice: “Stop oversharing and start listening.” It changed everything about how I navigate these interactions.

In a way, spending so much of my life around narcissistic personalities taught me how to mirror some of their strategies when I absolutely need to — but only as a form of self‑protection, not as a way of living.

So I have kind of like a boyfriend.. it feels like he’s going to be my life partner..

he has blue eyes. He has a daughter, she also has blue eyes..

before I met them I’ve always worn contacts purple, green, grayish green (not blue)

my natural eyes are brown.

Now I feel rather stupid or absurd putting them on because they have natural colored eyes.. I never felt bad about putting them on because it was part of my getting ready routine and it did make me look a little extra more put together like part of my makeup. I don’t really wear any makeup and the contacts makes the entire look come together..

but I can’t help but feel so “wannabe”ish now …

I never saw it that way at all.. and now somehow I feel like I’ll be judged.. in a bad way..

I have a lot of hair for example, and very long, and when girls who wear long extensions ask me about my hair and I reveal it’s all my natural hair, I can feel it in their face expression and mannerisms they feel uncomfortable now that theirs is fake.. they don’t say it but I see it and feel it, and I can’t help and feel the way they look upon finding out they’re fakes in front of that they’re trying to copy..

so my question is.. if I’m with them , should I stop wearing them?

Any guys here with colored eyes? If you found a girl and became your girlfriend an thought about life and family with her, if you notice she’s wearing contacts not for seeing but just to change her color eyes, would that make you feel like she’s a fake wanna be type of impression?

as of now he’s never seen me with contacts at all. I always show myself natural because I feel that is weird.. but if we actually stay together it means I won’t be able to war my pretty contacts again? Without looking all fake? :/

what’s you advice on This?