Ok so if you've read any of my Takes, then you know that most of them are of the feel good, inspirational variety. I usually try to stray away from the controversial topics. Today I am not. Today I am going to speak my mind in a way that people may not be used to. Simply because I'm tired of the hate.
I'll be the first to admit that I'm quick to say that society sucks. I saw this picture and thought about how low we've sank as a society. I lose a bit of faith in humanity everyday to be honest. Some of the things I read, just the way people speak to each other, it's disgusting. People have taken the idea of having preferences and completely twisted it. And I don't want to hear about being "politically correct" because quite frankly, I hate that statement. People hide behind not wanting to be politically correct. They use it as an excuse to be excessively rude and hateful. Hear me loud and clear when I say this: JUST BECAUSE YOU DON'T LIKE SOMETHING, DOES NOT GIVE YOU THE RIGHT TO BE HATEFUL! You're an adult and if you're not capable of expressing yourself and your preferences without bashing someone else's, then be quiet. Know and understand that it is very possible to get a point across without being harsh and offensive. And no, you don't need to sugarcoat it either. Find the balance.
I'll never understand why people are so mean spirited. So many of us (myself included) don't think before speaking. Never underestimate the power of words. Once they're out there, they can't be taken back. I want to touch on a few of the issues that seem to be surrounded in hate.
Racism
It does still exist. And it isn't specific to one race. I used to say that I couldn't imagine living in a time where everything was segrated and racial tensions were so high. Sometimes, it seems like it's 1960 instead of almost 2016. I feel like we're moving backwards instead of forward. What I can't seem to understand (and probably will never understand) is why people place so much value in something that none of us has any control over. We don't get to choose what color our skin will be at birth. Or what ethnic background we'll be. So why then, do people hate one another because of it? I've been the victim of racism many times. I've been made to feel like complete trash at the hands of white people. And guess what? I still don't hate them. I don't let what individuals do define an entire group. Hating them would make me a hypocrite. Do the things they say hurt? Of course. They're meant to. Being called things like a n*****, and a monkey are unexcusable. Period. But they don't define me. And guess what? I've gotten it from black people too. I guess I'm not angry enough at white people. I guess because I don't hate them, that translates into me not loving myself or my culture. I'm not black enough because I don't want to see all white people burned at the stake. This black girl listens to rock music and finds white guys attractive. Well guess what, #sorrynotsorry. In no way, shape, or form does that equate to me hating black people. I AM a black person. Let me ask a question. If we hate them because they hate us, aren't we just going in circles?
Sexual Preferences
Hello, my name is Char. I'm a Christian, and I don't hate gays. If you could only see the looks that I get when I say this. It's insane. The main principle with Christianity is love, so I don't get how some of the most devout Christians that I know can be so hateful. It goes against everything God stands for. Do you think Jesus would've shunned a gay person? I don't. Do you think His dying for us excludes gay people? I don't. And that doesn't make me any less of a Christian than the next person. God loves us all. He may not love the things we do, but He loves us. And in his commandments, He tells us to love one another. I'm not going to bash someone because their sexual preference is different from mine. I will pray for them, just as I pray for myself. Their lifestyle is between them and God and not for me or anyone else to bash or judge.
Religion
As I stated above, I'm a Christian. I believe wholeheartedly in God and accept Jesus as my Lord and Savior. My best friend of over 15 years is Muslim. In the 15+ years of our friendship, not once have we ever disrespected each others beliefs. She's been to church with me, and I've been to Islamic events with her. We have religious conversations all the time. I'm well aware of the fact that my religion isn't the only one out there. I'm well aware of the fact that not everyone believes in what I believe in. It's one thing to not believe, or have different beliefs, but to be outright disrespectful is unnecessary. And this includes everyone. If someone doesn't believe in God, I'm not going to call them names and look down my nose at them. That's their prerogative. I'm not going to shove my beliefs down their throat. All I'll do is ask that they respect me. I've had conversations with Atheist. Not all of them were negative. I respect the hell out of people who can allow themselves to see things from someone else's perspective. To put it simply, you respect me and I'll respect you. It's a two-way street.
Body Shaming
This one really drives me up a wall! I'm SICK of this debate. I've been sick of it. Bodies come in different sizes. They always have, and they always will. This whole body shaming thing has gone way too far. People have taken a body positive movement and completely shit all over it. This movement wasn't started to bash anyone. This movement wasn't started to promote obesity. This movement was to promote accepting yourself. Loving yourself. What was once something so beautiful is now filled with so much hatred and negativity. It's sad. God help you if you happen to love yourself at a size 16. You're a horrible person if you love your size 2 figure. Why can't both sizes be ok? Why do people feel the need to tear each other down to uplift themselves? And just so we're clear, I don't support body shaming of ANY variety. I'm a bigger girl and I don't find the need to bash thinner girls to make myself feel good. I know how hard it is as a female (and I say that not to take anything away from males) and struggling to accept ourselves. I don't agree with those bigger women that hide behind the body positive movement to bash thinner girls. It's not ok. At all. It's also not ok for a thin girl to hide behind "fighting back" to bash bigger women. MEN, it's not ok to bash a body size because your preference is different. Please understand that. And know that I'm well aware of the seriousness of being obese as well as being underweight. I also know when people are hiding behind false concern, which tends to be a lot. Stop using health as an excuse to bash. Stop thinking that every big person you see is someone that sits around eating constantly and complaining about their weight. Stop thinking that every thin girl you see is starving herself. TALK TO THEM. Have a conversation before you judge them based off appearance. Stop making people feel bad about loving themselves. I could wake up tomorrow and be at my goal weight. Flat tummy, nice butt and tone arms and thighs. And guess what? I still wouldn't look down on another because of their weight and decision to love themselves at that weight.
I don't have it in me to hate someone because they're different. At the end of the day, the world is full of different. Different races. Different religions. Different body types. Different people, with different views. I'm not saying that you have to accept everyone or their views. I'm saying that you should be respectful of others. Try to understand, instead of going out of your way to be rude. And if you can't understand or you understand yet still don't agree, then agree to disagree. Stop spewing hate. Be a light in this dark world. Be inspirational. Be motivational. Spread love, not hate.
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