Why Doing Housework Shouldn't Be A Debate About Gender Roles

[Anonymous]

Doing housework shouldn't be a debate about gender roles.

It is not about you. It is about how you can run the household more efficiently.

It focuses on the family, with you playing a role in it.

If you are on maternity leave and your hubby is at work, then what do you do? Housework. It is the perfect time to do housework. If you want to take more time off and just become a stay-at-home parent, then doing housework may help pass the time away.

You shouldn't expect to be paid. You do housework because you care about your family and are willing to sacrifice your time and energy on maintaining a clean house and delicious meals. My own mom and dad never give me an allowance for doing chores, because I am a family member, and as family, I have the responsibility to take care of my house. My parents' house, they say, is also my house, even though they are the true owners on paper. And so, I should take care of it as if it's my own home. That said, I believe other families should follow the same philosophy. Families have the obligation to support each other; that includes housework.

If you are rich enough, then you may hire a servant to do the housework. Well, at least you don't have to do the work yourself. You have hired help.

In the past, women primarily did housework, because they married early, got pregnant, entered motherhood, and with a child to breastfeed and watch over, they just had to stay at home. If they were rich, then they could have hired help. But the norm was to take care of one's own children. Also, girls learned how to become mothers by taking care of their younger siblings. It wasn't like, "You're a woman, so you have to do housework." It was more like, "You have to marry because life is short and precarious, and childbirth is risky, but it must done if we want to continue our family line and society."

It's a tough job, but someone's got to do it.

All stay-at-home parents deserve appreciation.

[Z-Spark]

Women of the older generation hate how women these days can't cook, clean or do anything , they oversleep and dont even care about waking up their own children for school, and in some houses the guy does the housework... to some thats normal, both work, both live together so the guy has to do the house work as well... except

Men are still expected to be the breadwinners (yes heard it from many girls around my age), expected to take care of his family, to work hard, to be manly and masculine and not a pussy , and guess what men who do house work are pussies, if you get home everyone and start doing the dishes, cleaning the bathrooms and preparing dinner you're a giant pussy, but not according to me but rather according to women themselves... women themselves admit that men who do house work are weak charactred and not true men, true men dont do that.

the new generation of women are very lazy and very irresponssible they think they can have their cake and eat it as well, what they need is a man, a true man to put them in their place , sadly not many men like that around.

and it works for both, women are better housewives and men usually work harder to make more money , unless the guy is a professional chef he is not going to be as skilled as a woman at cooking thats just the way it is.

[Anonymous]

I agree with you on the children don't need to be paid for doing house work, we do the same thing in my house but I think you've missed the point on the whole gender roles argument. When people discuss this it typically ion a scenario where the people involved have an equal amount of responsibility. Eg if both husband and wide are working 9 to 5 jobs the wide shouldn't have to be the only one that does housework since they both work. Another example would be with the children. If you had a daughter and a son and their both capable of doing chores, you shouldn't only give them to the girl or be biased about which chores to give to which child, you don't always have to give kitchen work to the daughter and yard work to the son (break out of the stereotypes). I also feel like its unfair for you to use situations of the last to back up your statements because, please correct me if I'm wrong, but those times weren't exactly politically correct. The role of women then wasn't the same as it it now. We work now side to side And on the same level with the men. But that being said, I honestly don't mind if you want to work all day and come back home and be the only one doing house work, it's your life.

[MrOracle]

Absolutely!

Cleaning your home is NOT anti-feminist male oppression - it's just a part of life. And especially if you don't work outside the home and/or aren't the primary earner, you should contribute to the household with some "sweat equity" instead. And that's no less true if the woman is working full-time and paying most of the bills, and the man is staying at home or working part-time - then HE should be doing most of the housework.

I'm not the most tidy person in the world, but I've cleaned plenty of toilets, washed tons of dishes, mopped lots of floors, and taken out the trash thousands of times. It's not that hard and not asking that much.

Hell, I'd love to trade 5 hours of stop-and-go traffic - just getting to and from the jobs where I have to actually work - to stay at home and clean the house for a while - but I actually have to do both.

[Sluthater]

Myself, my wife, my daughter, and my mother in law run our house like a NASCAR pit crew. Everyone has their jobs. Mother in law does most of the housework and often delegates to my daughter. If its nasty shit , if something needs repairs I do it. My wife and I share chauffeur duty for my daughter. My wife makes slightly more than me and trusts me to budget, invest, save, pay bills anticipate annual maintenance on the houses/ cars and give us both an allowance. We are a well oiled machine with 2 paid for homes working on a 3rd and we save $500 a week. Whole family is involved in everything..

[Anonymous]

I don't think the complaint from women who do stay at home is that their husbands should do his job and hers, it more stems from being treated as if all she does is stay at home and just lounge around while her husband is at work or that it's not a job. Any father who's stayed home with the kids for the day or weekend and had to do it all, learns to appreciate that sh--t real quick. Also keep in mind, that just because you took on the job of stay at home mother, doesn't mean you can't complain. Every single person with a job that I know, has complaints, because it's work, and it's not often full of fun sunshine and rainbows.

P. S. servant? Really? It's 2017.

[Anonymous]

I'm really fucking tired of the feminist-led discussion about who should do this or that in a relationship. Just fucking figure it out. But keep in mind men are still expected to be the primary breadwinners. I don't care what anyone says... women still expect that and they always will. They say they don't but their actions show otherwise.

I'm tired of feminists complaining about women doing more this or that... until women stop expecting men to be the primary providers, pay on dates and for pretty much everything else, they can get the fuck over it.

Society needs to put an end to this rampant female hypocrisy. Enough is enough.

[Nekocat]

Same here, everyone did chores in my family, with no allowance. My mom worked days and dad worked nights, so when either one was home they helped do the housework and look after people. Older siblings helped with the younger ones ( although mine were pretty flakey about it. Anyways, I agree with your take, in that chores are everyone's responsibility, and stay at home parents deserve respect.

[CubsterShura]

Darn it, do whatever you feel most comfortable with, good lordy. Your wife is a full-time housewife who cooks and looks after kids and you are one who supports the family financially and you two are nailing it together? Cool. Your wife and you both do jobs and both do household chores together and you're nailing it? Cool.

As long as you're both fine with it and nailing it, no one has the right to judge.

[hellionthesagereborn]

Women did house work because the man worked long hours to provide for her in all ways and in order to do her part she maintained the home. Currently men still do most of the bill paying, take on jobs that are hard or dangerous in order to continue doing this so if you are a woman and you find yourself doing the majority of the house work, that's why, because he is the one paying the bills, he is the one working his ass off for your benefit, pitch fucking in and stop complaining.

[Phoenix98]

There's a reason why women have done most of the housework for so long, men were generally the ones working 10 hours a day, paying the bills and providing for you in every possible way. And that is still majorly the case today.

That being said if you have a traditional household and your wife is doing the housework and cleaning, cooking whatever. You should show appreciation.

But that's a two way street, you are not the only one working their ass off.

[DonkeyRick69]

I agree. This is a goodtake. It's up to couples to pull together. My mother always did most of the housework even when she was working and my Dad took care of the outside work and DIY but still wasn't afraid to role up his sleeves and get stuck into the housework when he had free time.

[FatherJack]

I'm a FT working single dad , before I got rid of my wife , she NEVER lifted a finger around the house , I did ALL the chores , she cooked occasionally , if she could be arsed !! So this myth men NEVER do housework is BS , former British Army , so chores are done to standard !!

[Silver158]

Seen that in a relationship before. Can guarantee if a girl moved in with me and she was lazy like that it wouldn't get as far as marriage.

[sedrftvgyhujik]

Id use the term maid/chef rather than servant and thats the position i'd like to be in with the work I do being lucrative enough to hand off the work of cleaning to a maid and be a job creator though not necessarily the one I will be in.
That mixed in with bits of home automation like automatic curtains, robotic chef and single flaw hovers.

[vishna]

If someone stays at home, they should do the housework. However, every adult should adequately clean up after themselves ex) cleaning up spills immediately, clothes in hamper, those sorts of things that are about common sense.

[Draachen]

Traditional gender roles are wholesome as fuck and the only women who disagree are hairy cat ladies that probably peg their weird non-binary gender queer "boy"friend late into the evenings.

Best post on here I've seen tonight.

[Goodwifie]

I work less hours than my husband so I do most of the house work.
All I want is respect and appreciation for what I do.
You know like pick up after yourself.

[Anonymous]

Good take. I find the majority of the time the people complaining most about who does what are the people doing less and expecting more.
Males generally work longer hours and harder jobs, they are expected to also do the majority of the shit jobs around the house. But you will find the majority of the time the males are the ones getting shit on because they also don't do half of the work she has to do.

[TacosRAwesome]

Doing housework is a sign of independence and competence. So I dont think people should flight over who should do housework since for me everyone should know how to do basic stuff.

[IsenhowerJ]

My mom and step dad had me do outside work like lawn work and house hold stuff like vacuum, laundry, and the dishes.

[Anonymous]

Housework is someone else's ob. I don't do it.

What I have learned is the person who wants the housework done is going to have to be the one to do it.

[naraku]

I do whatever when it needs to be done. Dishes, Vacuum, fix the PC , fix my car. I couldn't give a fuck "who's suppose" to do it. sometimes my partner might do it too, so whatever whenever.

[John_Doesnt]

Every woman makes a much bigger mess in the bathroom, so it should be their job to clean the bathroom.

[chrismarie5589]

Yeah... that's NOT true

[John_Doesnt]

@chrismarie5589 you must hate science-facts because it's a science-fact that women make a huge mess in the bathroom.

[Zee15]

I'd like to see proof of this science fact (insert eye roll). You can't exactly stereotypes a while gender like that. I can probably meet plenty of guys that leave bigger messes in the bathroom because I can guarantee you that I don't leave a mess in the bathroom (with the exception of steam)