Words Can Be A Dangerous "Weapon". Are You Careful About How You Use Them?

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Be careful how you word things!!

It's not always the words used that are bad words or hurtful words, it's how they're used. People always say words can't hurt, but that is so untrue.

I'm sure everyone young or old has heard this saying:

Words can and do hurt!

However that saying came to be, I don't know because it is so far off base. This rings more true to me:

Bones heal faster than emotional scars!

Sometimes we may use words that unintentionally hurt people. But more times than not, people purposely use words to hurt someone. And think because they're just words, it's ok.

But when you intentionally hurt someone repeatedly with words to make someone feel less secure about themselves, or constantly berate and insult that is verbal abuse. And can be just as damaging as other forms of abuse.

Think before you speak

Before you say something, think if it is something you'd be okay with someone saying to you. If not, then maybe you shouldn't say it then.

And why are you saying what you're saying? Just to be hurtful? If you're trying to be honest with someone, that is a good thing. Even if it's a delicate subject, or you're bringing up something that person does that you don't like or approve of. But there's a right way and a wrong way to do that.

Example:

A. You look trashy in that outfit.

B. I don't want people to label you as trashy because of your outfit.

Example A comes off more as insult to the person while B is more about the outfit itself.

Be the positive, not the negative

Some words just sound like bad words or negative, but really it's the way we use them that make them so.

Words like hate, disgusting, and ugly.

But when used in a more positive than negative way, aren't so bad.

Examples:

A. I hate you. (negative)

B. I hate doing chores (positive)

A.You're a disgusting person (negative)

B. That was a disgusting movie (positive)

A. You're so ugly (negative)

B. Do you think these shoes are ugly? (positive)

Words kill credibility

Words don't just negatively affect the person they're directed at. Words can also have a negative effect on the way people view you.

Words can reflect who you are

The words you use, the way you speak to people can have a positive or negative reflection on the way people see you/view you as a person.

If you are always using words to insult or anger someone or that's the only way you feel you can get your point across, it will work negatively for you. People are only going to see/ hear the negative, and the anger and the point you were trying to make gets lost . You risk losing friends and relationships when that's the only way you know how to interact with people.

So again, think before you speak. Words spoken out of anger or out of hate, once spoken are never forgotten.

Forgiven, maybe but forget? Not always

Please always remember to use your words wisely, for your own sake, and for the sake of others.

As always, thank you for reading ♥️

"brainsbeforebeauty"😘

[Sensmind]

Very good take - Now I don't know if your take was talking about the likes of me but most definitely as I got older , I found myself becoming very aware of my words. 20 plus years ago I would have just lashed this answer out but now I will reread it and think how does it affect the person reading it, could it be misinterpreted in any way.
Just as a bit of a flip side to the impact of negativity, I have become more aware of the power of positivity , a well placed "Good Job" or "Great Work", "You look beautiful " can do a whole lot more than just be a simple phrase

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Very well said. Thank you ❣️🙂

[Sensmind]

Thanks for MHO

[shadowlhyn]

Yeah always... I really hate to say offensive words so to less offensive words i talked less... though sometimes i cannot control to say bad words specially if im angry...

[roland77]

True but try not to offend anyone. You end up saying nothing at all. There are people who have thinner skin and feel quicker offended. And I may say bad words, when I'm angry, too.

[shadowlhyn]

Yeah right.. saying bad words really suck if it just because of anger you offended someone..

[DictumVeritas]

The world doesn't give a though about your fragile fee-fees and the fee-fees of all the offended. Laws and rules to the contrary are simply cultural Marxist control mechanisms to censor opinions, straight out of the Bolshevik playbook. Grow up while you still have some freedoms left.

[DictumVeritas]

Edit "The world doesn't give a though" should have read: The world doesn't give a thought.

[shadowlhyn]

Thought should give the world meaningful and useful to others and not to make others think of imperfections.

[kymberz]

good thoughts, good words, good deeds. one of the nuns that taught catechism taught me that. and your post just evokes the magic that she had. and aren't all words magic? like say out loud "candelabra" or "abracadabra" or "celestial" ... wow those words just roll of your tongue like magic! and then if you imagine every word to be a breath that comes from inside you that you are now sharing with the world - yikes - words really are powerful. so we should be very careful with the words we say because they can affect and uplift the people in our lives and we should always want our words to be positive and helpful. criticism and the like is beneath us. understanding, empathy and compassion is where love lies. and it doesn't all have to be flowery and sickeningly sweet - sometimes the truth is icky-blecky-butt-ugly. but truth is always beautiful especially if delivered with care and kindness. and Bbb - there's a reason i follow you all over this site, eh? thank you for the constant reminders. they really help me. oh and yes words being important and all and then there's me - blathering all over the place singing baby shark - it never gets old! "and we're all safe - doo-de-doo-de-doo" - bahahhaha! love your Gurl!

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Thanks for your kind words 🙂

[kymberz]

you are always welcome!

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

🙂🤗♥️

[RickPen]

The power of words also depends on what the receiver gives them.

For instance, I was called an incel on this site today, by someone who clearly doesn't understand me, but wants to throw their weight around. It's a blind insult on their part, and carries no weight with me, as they're ignorant of my person. But oh how they tried.

We should be aware of what we say, and not just how we say something. I've known too many people to say horrible things "as a joke." That's unacceptable, as the content itself often matters more than the delivery. This is especially true in text form.

Respect... it's something we should give each other, but so often don't.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

I agree with you. Too many people have forgotten, internet or not, there should be some respect.

[Unit1]

I found the power of words when my parents were too reactive of my mouth. I could literally trigger them without even trying.

So I decided to seal it years ago. Then I found, that silence is golden. Now they're unhappy still. Now what shall it be? At least when silent there's much fewer conflicts than the other way around.

As for me, I follow these "moments"

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Very nice 👍🙂

[Meropatrick]

Its so true. We are social animals and speech is our way to connect. Children get their identity from the words their parents tell them things like (good boy, you did well, you are beautiful) these things build the child. That is why in some countries like Germany calling someone a name on the street is a crime and you can be fined for it. Words are very effective. Each of us has a word that rub them the wrong way. For example some people being called fat can affect them a lot. Even lead them to develop eating disorders)
Not for me. But being called a f@g can really affect me a lot. The opposite is for my brother call him a f@g he would laugh it off and not care. But Call him chubby or a slob and you will get smacked.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Exactly. You get it. It's uncalled for to be rude for no reason. And kids pick up on what people do, not always what people tell them to do.

[lightbulb27]

I suspec the person who said "sticks and stones" was a sociopath or narcissist... they don't feel like most of us do.

I am more careful about what I say, but do slip up. I think the heart of what is said is important as well as what is said. The way something is said makes a difference.

saying things in writing is more dangerous than ever with online, text, etc.. It's so easy to mis communicate/mis translate.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

I agree with you. Why I've always preferred real conversation to text. Thanks 🙂

[lightbulb27]

You are a beautiful light in the world. May your day be filled with graceful moments and your heart be filled with joy. May you find abundance of love around you. I will love you to the end of the age.
happy valentines day!

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Aww thank you. Same to you ♥️🤗

[jgokgotit]

I'm not deliberately mean with my words, but I am blunt and honest. I believe a kind lie is worse than a brutal truth. I say what I feel needs to be said, no more no less. So, no, I am not necessarily careful how I use my words in terms of how much they will hurt. However, I am careful to make sure what I say is the absolute truth and I am careful to make sure there is no misinterpretation of my words in most cases.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Yeah, never said lie. I'm brutally honest myself. But there's ways to do it and still be respectful.

[jgokgotit]

Exactly. People today think just because you do not say what they like you are mean. I hate that.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Yeah that's not what I meant. But people are throwing unnecessary words and hate around, that's more what I was trying to address.

[Guest25]

The 2 biggest regrets anyone will ever have in their life are, 1: Time spent with your loved ones. 2: Words out of your mouth. You will never be able to have or take those back. When I give friends advice, I tell them to pick their words carefully. Once it's said, it can't be taken back.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

♥️Very very well said. Thank you. That is so true on both levels!

[roland77]

Still you ask them for forgiveness.

[Guest25]

I had a teacher who was very close to her grandmother, the last words she ever said to her were hurtful things because she was mad. Before she could say she was sorry and that she loved her, her grandmother died. She told me to never leave someone I care about angry because I'll never no if it will be the last time I see them.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

That is so true

[Lliam]

Words can cause severe damage. They can cause life-long harm. I try to build people up, give them confidence, make them feel appreciated. Tearing people down is violent, toxic behavior. The idea of being "brutally honest" is bullshit. If you need to criticize someone, you should do it gently, kindly and constructively.

[JackSmy]

Not always the words, themselves, but how the other 'hears' what isn't said, the way they think, and how they 'hear' those words.
I am so often chastised on here, because I say something meaning it in a sarcastic, or ironic way, and someone comes back, very offended, about something I never SAID, but they INTERPRETED! If we were talking, they could see my expression, or vocal intonation, and just KNOW, the intent was in jest, but through plain text, it is often misunderstood!
I cannot control how people read what I post, but I can choose words, maybe other words, in some cases, but ultimately, if I post something with a sarcastic, or ironic intent, and someone chooses to be offended, I can't control that, I can't interpret, for them, through their eyes and life experience, and they might be offended, when I NEVER intended any offense!

[Xoirwinkan]

Yes. 99% of the time I really consider what I say, because I dont say much, except around my closest friends and family and acquaintances. I have been called diplomatic in the past, although I have a few years back gotten a lot more blunt, all of a sudden, as a conscious decision. I am too polite, except around my brothers, for example.
However, my unspoken inner dialogue is a swirling soup of foulness, obscenities, and a longing for beauty.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Very good answer ♥️🙂

[Xoirwinkan]

Thanks!

[1stranger]

Thank you.. I agree with what you say but my thoughts about the examples; words like trashy, hate, disgusting, ugly are negative meaning words.
Therefore these words add negative meaning to every sentence to me.
Eventually you use this word, even if it is a clothes or a shoe.

[Dargil]

I worked for a British Engineer in the past. He made this simple statement.
The German language is efficient and descriptive.
The French language is poetic and interpretive.
The English language is a weapon.

[Dargil]

An example he used is the difference between:
"That really won't work!" A predictive statement.
and
"That simply won't do." A value judgement.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Good examples

[HindsightJon]

Some might scorn or scoff and say you live in a bubble and not in reality. Yet an eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.

I like your words and applaud your strength to share them in the face of adversity. Thank you for sharing such good advice.

[itsallaroundtheworld]

I totally agree with everything you said. Words are tremendously powerful and I have just recently felt that power and what it can do to people.
If words were glass (instead of air puffs), people would be careful before speaking.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Very well said ❣️🙂

[arabgoddess]

I say that if you don't have anything good or nice to say then don't say anything at all.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Exactly!! Couldn't agree more!!

[arabgoddess]

♥ ♥ ♥

[Anonymous]

Very well put together. I love your myTake. ❤Thank you for posting this. It's so very true. Words can destroy a person's self-esteem , which can have a negative influence over their entire life

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Thank you. And yes, they can. Just wish more people would understand that. How can adults teach children right from wrong, when they don't practice that themselves?

[Opinion Owner]

I wish that too. Too many people don't care or don't realize how much hold their words can have over someone.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Don't care is more what it is in my opinion.

[Opinion Owner]

what do you mean?

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

You said people don't care or don't realize. I think they realize, they just don't care. That's what I meant

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah, I think most people do realize as well. They have a total disregard for other people's feelings.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Exactly. Think freedom of speech means free to say just anything. But just name-calling and other rudeness just unnecessary and uncalled for

[englisc]

This is weak shit.

"People who say sticks and stones have probably never been criticised, words can leave scars"

I've been criticised plenty, I still use that phrase. The purpose of teaching that, especially to children, is to teach them to have a thick skin. Not to crumble just because someone called them a mean word.

I have an even better phrase:

"Some people pray for calmer seas, while others build stronger boats".

You can pray for calmer seas all you like, it won't work. You'd better build yourself a stronger boat.

You can ask people not to say mean things all you like, it won't work. You can ask people not to bully all you like, it won't work. You'd better toughen up.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Oh I'm tough. But thanks for your "advice' anyways

[englisc]

You're welcome.

[KrakenAttackin]

Are you afraid of being called a c***?

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@KrakenAttackin
From a keyboard warrior lmao no boo your little insults don't hurt shows your character, not mine 🙂

[KrakenAttackin]

This is my point. Words should not dominate your little snowflake world.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@KrakenAttackin
Have a good day.

[DictumVeritas]

Wait, wait, you can not equate words with violence and the truth is a directive force for change. Being brutally honest is the kindest thing a person can do for you even if the truth hurts you, you should take the words as an opportunity to evaluate both sides of the coin.

That being said, I am careful not to be petty and very few things in life drives me to provide a negative non-solicited comment.

[Dchrls78104]

"Encouraging words warm the heart, but cruel words break the spirit."(Proverbs 15:4). So, deliberately hurting people with cruel words violates the truth and is not Christian. It figured in at least one suicide by a teenager in my country.

[roland77]

Christianity has nothing to being human to others. You can be totally a human with being an atheist but also be an a-hole while being religious. I don't see a connection there. Still the bible is true at this point.

[NerdInDenial]

While I like your sentiment, the world is cruel. Your perspective relies on others' behaviors; however, you cannot change how people act. If you want to truly be free from the scars of hateful words, you have to learn to be self-reliant and not define who you are by external validation.