Everyone Deserves Love

[MCheetah]

(IF YOU DON'T FEEL LIKE READING ALL OF THIS, JUST SKIP TO THE END.)

MCheetah's MyTake #48:
You know, I had a pretty lousy Saturday. I remembered it was 9/11, gave my 30 seconds of silence in memorial, and then headed on out for the evening. I won't bore anyone with the details, but let's just say, I got treated like sh*t by a few women today. Among the litany of annoying problems I had today, I went to the hypermarket around here. In Korea, it's called Homeplus, but it's basically the equivalent of KMart or Walmart. I started a new job, here in this new city, and I needed to buy a chair for my apartment. The place was closing soon, but I was on time. I got my chair and was ready to check out, but the cashier left ten minutes early. I said I literally only had one item, but she didn't care. She shirked off doing her job, just to leave ten minutes earlier than she was supposed to. That is called, being a f*cking asshole. And people do it all the time.

And it got me thinking, as I headed up into my apartment. The people who are nasty like this... Both the young women and cashier... The people who are rude and impolite... They are not happy people, inside. No one ever thinks about it, on the surface. And it's not just young bitchy, snobby women who are like this. So many people act like total pricks. I'm even guilty of it, sometimes. And when you start tugging on the rope, to investigate why are people such utter ASSHOLES nowadays... You discover that they aren't loved. Sounds simple when you say it, but no one ever really THINKS about it. Deep-thinks about it.

I've always said that "90% of the world's problems come from sh*tty parenting." You can quote me on that (as long as you credit me as a source). But the deeper, real root cause of all of this bad behavior is... People don't feel loved. You can say they're not happy. But they don't feel loved. They give off this demeanor of "I don't have time for your sh*t." They look beaten up by life. Even if, like so many young women nowadays, they seem fine on the surface. Sh*tty behavior doesn't come out of nowhere.

There's two people I've been talking to in PM's here on this site. One is a long-time user on here, and the other is kinda new. Both display a level of empathy and caring I just don't see in the real world. These two women display warmth and kindness, even though it's just over the internet. And it's almost enough to warm my icy, Absolute Zero heart.

While I'm not a total piece of sh*t like so many random people in public nowadays, I get fed up with life, too. Seeing all the wokeness, all the indoctrination and propaganda going on in Western society. Seeing absolute clowns like Joe Biden and the Biden Administration destroy America even more so than it already has been. Seeing people try to hang onto airplanes to escape Afghanistan. Seeing Communist China go unchecked when literally every single one of those bastards should have been executed or serving life sentences in prison for war crimes and crimes against humanity...

Needless to say, there is a LOT of f*cking negativity in the world right now. Like, this has to be record highs of negativity and misery going on, right now. Ironically, in a time of economic prosperity and global unity (aside from a few places like China, North Korea, and Afghanistan). This world is FILLED with such negativity and misery. And as much as I would love to be the beacon of light and hope in the world, I had a pretty f*cked up childhood from an abusive mother, myself. Literally most of my life has been pretty negative and filled with abuse, honestly. So much so, it's not even a big deal to me. It just is what it is. I would love to be the shining beacon of hope and warmth in the world, but when 90-95% of my entire existence has been misery, I can't pretend that I'm some kind of warm loving person.

However... I value the power of love. Empathy. Warmth. Kindness. I had a late ex fiancée I told you guys about before. Six-foot-three and a half redhead that died almost nine years ago now. Besides her looks and feminine wiles, the thing that I appreciated the most about her was her warmth and kindness. And she was far from some perfect angel. She went through depression too, just like me. While her family life was fine, she hated her height and being fuller figured (at her heaviest, being around 320 lbs; she had lost weight while I was with her and got down to 285 or so). She was a living example of being a rose that grew out of the gravel and debris of some war zone fallout. And me just being with her made me a better person. A much calmer, patient person. I would no longer feel like being a prick or constantly being so low-key angry all the time. I'm not sure if any of her warmth rubbed off on me, or not. But I know how much better life can be when you feel love and warmth from someone. Empathy and kindness. Even in a really bad day, that can be all the difference in the world.

Getting back to my crummy day today. While I had some young women treat me like sh*t, as well as a lazy cashier leave her shift early, making it so I could not buy my chair, I did have one guy help me out today. A total stranger. I was looking for a place, and he stopped walking to help me. He spoke English and tried to help me find the place, even though he didn't have to. That stuck out to me. Among all the other bad stuff today, I had a young man try to assist me in finding something when he didn't have to. And looking back on what just happened two hours ago, it makes me think, "His mother must love him a whole lot."

Think about how broken society has become. Between feminist misandry and misogyny (actual misogyny, not the overused buzzword it's become nowadays), and between incel misogyny, we have entire groups of people who are hateful, bitter, miserable sacks of sh*t. And while I've never been an incel and still am not one (despite not being far-left and having equally bitter women assume I'm one), I totally understand what it's like to be seeking love, only to have people sh*t on you and abuse you for it, for any number of reasons, including a lack of height, or a lack of looks. It'd be easy for me to become an incel, but I'm not. I look inward at my problems, not blame everyone else for my personal problems. This is the reason why feminists and incels exist. Ultimately, they want love, but they blame society for not giving it to them. Both are extremely insecure groups of people, seeking love, but not getting it. Feminists usually lack love from their family or home life, and internalize that as fear and paranoia about being a woman in the most female-friendly era in human history. Incels just want a girlfriend, but lack looks, self-respect, and any strong male role models in their life. And both become miserable walking piles of insecure and extreme bitterness.

And it's not just them. Look at any modern group of people. Any modern club or cult. From Progressives (social justice warriors), to actual white nationalists who hate black people or women. Most of these people seek attention of some kind. But usually the attention they want is love and acceptance. Some get it, but not from the "approved targets." While others get nothing at all. You can do this all day long and name groups of people filled with anger, misery, and bitterness, and they'll all have the same thing in common, whether they're getting plenty of attention or not: They aren't LOVED.

So today, despite how annoying the day was for the most part, I remember that kind man who helped me. I remember the conversations I had with the two tall, lovely women on this site. And in a sea of otherwise negativity, I am able to feel grateful for those positive moments I experienced. This, coming from someone whose nearly-entire life has been negative and filled with negativity, who has had PLENTY of women treat him like sh*t, and who would have every reason to succumb to the incel mentality.

It's not right that SO MANY PEOPLE in the world don't feel loved. Literally, billions of people, at this point. So many people who walk around, doing jobs they hate, living lives they don't really for, addicted to vices that don't help them, whether that's marijuana, or tobacco, or alcohol, or fast food, or cheap empty sex, or gambling, or anything else out there. Trying to fix their numb existences with garbage and substances. I haven't been loved more than most people, and yet, when I come across good people, it has a lasting effect on me. Maybe it might be a drop of pure spring water in a sea of sludge, but it does have an effect on me.

Even the two women I've talked to on here. Why would such people take time out of their lives to give advice to a total stranger? It's something I'm really not used to. But the point I'm getting to here is, just imagine how much better the world would be with a little bit of love in it. Yes, I know this might make some of you think of a cheesy 2003 Black Eye Peas song, but it's true: Where IS the love?

Imagine if you could cure incels and feminists overnight. By just giving them the therapy and tools to love themselves that they're severely lacking. Imagine if you could do the same for everyone on the political extreme, whether that's on the right, or especially on the left. Imagine if all the political corruption, greed, and power-mongering could just go away, by allowing people to feel loved and accepted, as they are. I can assure you part of the reason I don't accept myself is because I never had a mother that loved me, never had acceptance from my high school peers since I failed to grow up, and aside from one woman who died one year into our relationship, never felt accepted by anyone before.

If you don't feel like you are loved in this world, you'll tend to be an angry, bitter asshole to others. And how many assholes do you think are out there in the world right now? On social media, or in the real world? Although it's easy to dismiss, dehumanize, and debase our political opponents, mostly because it's easy, it's far harder to love and accept someone you may not agree with. All these pointless arguments from Liberals vs Conservatives, Democrats vs Republicans, Blue Staters vs Red Staters, Vax Bullies vs Anti-Vaxxers, Men vs Women, Incels vs Feminists, MGTOW vs Married Couples, Straight people vs LGBT-etc, Freedom vs Communism, and so on... They're all meant to tear us apart. To divide us. To make us hate each other. To destroy each other. Where will that get us, in the end? Back to the Stone Age?

(THE POINT OF ALL OF THIS)
We NEED to come together and learn how to love again. EVERYONE. DESERVES. LOVE. And while I'm far from an expert on the matter and almost have never been loved my entire life, I'm at least intelligent. Intelligent enough to know this fact of life. And that if you don't want to be surrounded by angry bitter assholes 24/7 who seek to make life miserable, then love has to start from somewhere. Maybe the experts on it, like my late fiancée, and the two women I've talked on here, can lead the way. And show us how to love again. Because living a world where everyone hates each other, most of all themselves, isn't a world that seems like it's worth living in. Every single person on this planet deserves love. None of this "only if they agree with my politics" BS. If we don't do something now, I don't think we'll have much time left in the future to do something about it. So those who know how to love the most: Please lead the way. And show us how it's done. Love isn't just a four letter word naïve people use to describe brain chemicals.

[Lliam]

I see what you're saying, MC.
So, incivility comes from thinking "I don't give a fuck", which comes from misery and/or thinking "Nobody gives a fuck about me", which stems from loneliness and lack of nurturing.

You're right, people fill the emptiness in their lives with all kinds of things from drugs to food to TV to video games, etc. Some people fill the emptiness by engaging in risky or violent behavior. Some people self mutilate in an effort to be noticed. Some people fill it by accumulating more and more and more money and "things". But it's never enough.

I think you're right that everybody wants to be loved and cherished, to feel understood, appreciated and accepted for who they are. Unfortunately, some people feel unworthy and self sabotage. They have no idea what love is, so they lash out or use and abuse others in the same way that they have been used and abused.

Some people engage in toxic behavior. They tell themselves they are motivated by love when they attempt to force others to do what they think is right. That's not love. It's disrespectful, self-centered and egotistical.

Maybe the search for love is too ambitious. You can't just say "I want it" as if it's another consumer good. Love doesn't just walk up and say "Here I am!" It can be here all along, invisible yet inside us and surrounding us like air. The first thing we have to do is believe that it exists. It's like the quote from the Wizard of Oz, "You've always had the power, my dear. You just had to learn it for yourself."

Why would someone risk their life to help a total stranger? People do that. It that love?

Another kind of love is the special love between partners. It might begin as blazing infatuation or simply deep admiration. But is can grow and mature into the most comforting, satisfying form of human relationship there is. It brings two people closer and closer together. At its core is absolute trust.

I don't think friendship with others is anything like the kind of love that develops between partners. It's not the same thing. And no, I'm not talking about sexuality. It's just that friends are more like very close acquaintances. I've had a lot of friends, including BEST friends in my life. But friends eventually drift apart. They may remain friends, be nostalgic about the their times together, and even continue to chat and get together. Or not. People have their own lives.

When it comes to the big picture, having love in our hearts is an essential part of being a good person. Personally, nature - all of creation - fills me with awe, wonder and deep gratitude. And creation includes people. In some respects, I 'love' everything from celestial bodies, to rocks, to living things with all my heart. And people are the most wondrous of all. They are infinitely complex and creative. I can't come close to understanding anyone else's experiences, either past or present, so I try not to judge.

I think the best we can do is empathize. We can be nice to others and bring a bit of joy to their lives, make them feel seen and appreciated, and try, even in small ways, to help them. Merely being courteous and friendly can brighten someone's day. Is that a form of love? I think it is.

People can be so beaten down, lonely and hopeless. They suffer loss that we can't imagine. I've seen the simplest act of kindness bring someone to tears. At times like that, my heart swells to bursting and my own eyes well up.

What would the world be like if we could all simply be kind to each other?

[moviedude714]

I always hated it when people say there's someone for everyone

[karaspara]

Fucking hell even the end was long