I don't understand this one bit. I don't like making plans, and honestly, guys don't give a f*** what kind of thing we do. So, for example, if a platonic female friend of mine and I are about to hang out. She might ask me what do you wanna do, or I might ask her that. And generally what happens is I say I don't care what we do, I just wanna hang out. Whether it be bowling, going to the movies etc etc. And the girl generally will say, after I ask.. what do you wanna do?.. I don't know...
I don't have a problem with letting girls make the plans, and it won't make me feel emasculated. I, and other guys as well, honestly don't care what we do as long as we do something. When its with another guy we generally have things in common when it comes to activities, and we don't care if the other guy likes the idea that we come up with. We will say, hey you wanna play basketball? no. okay, wanna play tennis. no. wanna play pool. no... play call of duty or madden nfl... Nah man I'm good... man what the f*** do you wanna do, go f***ing shoe shopping damn... we don't care if we hurt their feelings one single bit
whereas if it's a girl regardless if it's a girlfriend or a platonic friend. We care about doing something that you want to do. We don't want to bring up something that you don't like, and we don't want to come up with many different options. Girls generally say they don't care, and whether or not that is true is irrelevant to us guys. Because we want them to have a good time doing something they want to do, not to do something just because we asked. So, instead of having guys make the plans. Come up with something on your own.
This is how I see it. If the guy ask to hang out, he should come up with something to do. But if you ask a guy, hey wanna hang out, then you better come up with something to do.
For me the scenario is usually flip. I'm usually always on time, or a bit early. I hate being late. I will refuse to cancel last minute unless I got a call to go to work. Any other reason is no good reason. (well unless someone just died).. I don't do the whole, oh my friend came into town and I haven't seen them in forever... What I say to that is, you and I made plans, we are hanging out. After we hang out, you can go see your friend. It's not likely they are gonna be in town for just a few hours and then leave. You got time. I do make exceptions. But generally speaking.
For example, tomorrow. well actually today now that it's 2 in the morning. I made plans with a friend to hang out with her. Then another girl asked last week to hang out, but we made plans for a couple days ago. She had a job interview so all is forgotten, she isn't available till today. So I will hang out with her, early, and then hang out with the other girl later in the day. And the first girl I mentioned when I asked what time I should show up? She said, I completely forgot about tomorrow. Uhm.. After nap time [idk when that is yet (she has a son, hence nap time)]
cause we try to make it as perfect as we can so you females are happy, it hard.
but I think its only when you ladies are involved that he take along time, cause when Men get together, sh*t gets done. that's why back in the day a group of men would leave camp and in a few hours comeback with a mammoth dinner.
hope this helps lol
Hey there,
I totally understand how you feel. The significant fights I have with my boyfriend is usually about planning. I don't understand how men work, but it seems like they can only do one thing at a time. If their head is filled with work, then they can only think about work. So that means, you will become the last thing on his mind. Not to be negative, it is just their nature. They cannot multi task or multi think.
When it comes to planning, they hate it. My solution to you is let the relationship take its course. Don't ever force anything. Make plans for yourself if you want. He comes or not, it's all his choice and you should hold no expectation. After all, he is an individual that got into your life. It doesn't mean he is going to follow your way or change to become a planner just because you want it that way.
Men can't change. If you love him, you have to love yourself more. And see the magic happen in your life. :)
Story of my life, haha. So I hear ya, girl!
I think we should take their actions as signs; the guys that we have long lasting relationships with won't do this to us. They'll follow through with plans and not make us play the waiting game for them to figure out their schedules -- and then cancel once they do. These aren't the kinds of guys we need in our lives and we shouldn't put up with this bullsh*t.
I wish more guys would answer this, because I'm dying to know their reasoning, haha!
i know. I hate that about the guy I was seeing. but eventually the late cancellations just got to be too much and I stopped seeing him. it's ridiculous
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Because if you weren't around he wouldn't have to make plans he never ever does. It doesn't really just come out of frickin nowhere when girls are needy and have higher expectations than anything in the world. Like, if he doesn't make a "good plan", you'll be pissed and leave him because you love stuff being given to you on a silver plate. (obviously, who wouldn't?)
So yeah, about the lateness and cancelling it just greatly shows how you love to pick guys who don't care nearly as much. xD
So the question could be, Girls, why do you expect guys to make the plans for everything?
We don't like plans. Women typically do all the planning. Unless its like a bbq with some friends or something really important like buying a new t-shirt.
AND WHY DO US GUYS ALWAYS HAVE TO DO ALL THE F***IN' WORK!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
I make plans with a lot of things. But it's just most guys nature to be spontaneous, and geez, most girls like spontaneity! But you also need to be able to make plans.
haha what kinda guys are you around X)
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