What's your opinion on child support?

I see it as a way to extort dads for money and make it harder for them to see their children. like @Uannoyme said, It should be for absent mothers or fathers.. NOT for fathers or mothers who are active in their child's life. But, The state because of Title IV-D, makes 50 cents for every dollar of child support collected, so there is a huge incentive for states, and more specifically family court judges, to put men on child support. Its evil. Yes support your children, but keep the fucking courts out of it.
Additionally, Here is another fun stat, 60% of mothers who are ordered to pay child support do not pay, and see no consequences for it. Additionally they are more often than not assessed less support than their male counterparts. Where as when a man fails to pay child support, his license is revoked, and is jailed. How the hell is he supposed to pay support from jail? How the hell is he supposed to go to work if he can't drive him self? Its a paradox. Its an unfair system, and unfortunately its a system that makes states billions of federal dollars.
Plus, should a male fail to pay child support on time, that mother then is likely to withhold the child. This happens all the time with my best friend. He was a day late paying her, She told him that because of that it would be months before he would be allowed to see his child. the courts do nothing about that. The police do nothing about that. Child support should NEVER be used as a reason to stop an able and willing father from being a father. And the women that perpetrate that do not deserve to be mothers. Period. because they do not see the child as a child that belongs to both parents. She sees the child as property to be used as leverage over the father. Parental alienation is evil. Its mostly women that do it, and its because they are too stupid to drop an fucking grudge. Men do it too but the percentages are WAY smaller. even if the percentages of parents were 50% male custodial, and 50% female custodial, Men are less likely to alienate the mother.
Oh and ladies, if your only reason for stopping your ex from seeing your child is it will result in a reduction of your child support, You are not worthy of being a mother and should not have that child at all.
I am an attorney and I have handled many divorce cases involving child support requirements. I culd tell you how this works in my great home state of Florida but the facts I would relate would contradict many of the baseless assertions made by others in response to this question. And others have cited examples like, "I had a friend who. . ." and they tell you spme horror story but it's only one side of the story and those horror stories also don't include comments about whether the friend ever brought the msiconduct to the attention of their judge.
I know many family court judges and they are intelligent and fair minded people. They do not always favor women or men. They DO get angry at parents who try to use the children as weapons in the never-ending war between the exes and it is a frustrating position for a judge.
If anyone wants to actually discuss facts, I'm open to a discussion, but I won't tolerate people telling me I'm wrong because "they heard a story about a guy who went through a divorce and the judge ordered. . ."
This guy is the only one here that makes sense. Everyone in the comments acts like they know everything because... reasons, kind of, but just some crap that happened that got them mad once, or some shit they heard or read somewhere.
The guy who does this stuff as a job, he talks like, well, he doesn't ever get mad, and all the screaming and hollering people in the comments are just the stuff he deals with that gives him a headache at his job
It’s definitely for the benefit of the child more than anything. I can understand why people get angry about it because it basically seems like the adult equivalent of being told to share your food when your friend already has their own plate but the reality is it’s more akin to having to share a toy. A toy that comes with lots of parts and accessories and things to take care of so you have to share all of those parts every time someone plays with it. The reality is child support does ultimately go into the care of the child, it pays for their food, school, books, entertainment, clothes, and the reason they need that money is because there might be a different standard of living between the two households but the kid still needs to stay alive so the richer parent that used to support them and maybe the other spouse has that responsibility to ensure that just as much as the other parent they’re divorcing. And it’s a lot easier to do that if both parents have access to similar resources when it comes to financing that kid’s care and education. Is it messy sometimes? Abso-fuckingl-utely. Does it work? Yeah, it does. Don’t fix what isn’t broken, you’re taking care of a child and in a majority of cases that’s exactly what the money goes towards.
In what world does Kim Kardashians child cost $200k a month
A world where she makes 200k more a month than Kanye, child support is meant to keep up the lifestyle the child is used to
You chose to have the kid, you chose to put your name on the birth certificate, you knew what the risks were if you ever broke up with your partner, so I’m all for it. I don’t know about other countries but here, let’s say that a woman gets accidentally pregnant and the man doesn’t want the child, he can simply sign something that says he wants nothing to do with the child and then not put his name on the birth certificate, and then he never has to pay child support. Obviously he doesn’t get to see the kid either unless the kid wants to meet him once they’ve turned 18.
But seriously, child support helps the child a lot. Being a single parent is hard, or even co-parenting is hard if one parent has the child 5 days a week and the other parent only has the child for 2 days a week. There needs to be financial help for the parent who’s got main custody of the child.
Opinion
45Opinion
I think it is something necessary to support the children to pay for the extra rent, electricity, water, food, clothes, and school supplies that the child needs. I was in this situation where my ex wife left and left the children with me. It was only $150 a week and I know men that pay a lot more for just one kid. It was a constant struggle to get her to pay or have the child support agency to do anything. She would do things like take a year off to not work. The state would drag it's heels to even bring her to court to explain herself. Meanwhile, my new wife would be working at the country jail and tell me about guys that would be arrested for missing a child support payment and they could not bail out and they could not get out until they paid their back child support. So I felt there was a double standard there. I did receive some luck when she was rear ended by a semi truck (car was damaged but she was fine) and received $10k on top of repairing her car. The state did intercept that money. But overall it was a constant struggle to collect it. And on the participation side it was a constant struggle to get her to visit her own kids. Just a bad situation.
I am made to pay an excessive amount of money for child support. Excessive in that my ex does not spend anything near that amount to care for our child, and she even admits that.
The amount is unreasonably based on my income, not on any clear need. Further, she can (and does ) spend that money on anything she wants, including herself. There is absolutely NO accountability, and she feels she is entitled to all this although cannot she cannot quite state why.
I have effectively NO custody or visitation with my child, as my ex conveniently decided to move to another state right in the middle of our divorce, and took our child with her with the blessing of the court. I was awarded 2 hours of visitation once a month in that distant state, and my ex refuses to even make our child available for that. I would return to court to try to object to that, except that my attorneys have advised that I not bother as they believe it would be a waste of time and money.
I spent about $ 150,000 attempting to get some time with my child and some justice in this divorce, and got neither. So yes, I think I was treated just a little poorly.
@KrakenAttackin Thanks.
Short of a child dying, I can't imagine anything worse. I am no longer amazed when I hear stories about how savage and mercenary women are.
Women are absolutely savage and mercenary, but I've kind of grown to expect that. What what I didn't expect and was very surprised to be. The recipient of was the blatant discrimination by the trial court. I was never accused of any mist doing and in fact I've never done anything wrong in this context and yet the judge acted like I was a criminal. She also treated me like I was a criminal and if she could have found a reason to put me in prison I have no doubt she would have done so. You might ask yourself why didn't he appeal? The easy answer is I just ran out of money. Were I live? It costs about $50,000 to appeal a judges decisions and that was about 49,000 more than I had having spent all my money on this ridiculous divorce. The bottom line is if a judge in a family law court mistreats you and you can't afford to appeal you wind up just eating the injustice.
@KrakenAttackin I hope we both are.
There are valid reasons why many men refuse to marry now or have children. Women are complaining more and more about this. GOOD.
@WanderingLoveWizard Poor trolling.
The system is antiquated and broken, and manipulated by many to get revenge, it also fails children cause they'd rather send a child from child protective services back to a horribly unfit mother cause apparently that's the only way for a father to eventually get custody of his child.
Women get a choice of weither or not to be a mom, they get a choice of if she dosent want it she can give to her parents, give up for adoption or just to aborted.
Men get no choice, just held at gun point and told to obey the woman that may have been a broken condom one night stand for all we know, but either way their live is over.
It makes perfect sense for one of the individuals, after divorce, to pay child support. What doesn't make sense is that in almost all cases, the mother gets custody of the children so that the man has to pay child support. That's based on an old premise that mothers take better care of their children than fathers do, and women stay at home while men work. In today's world, that may not be the case, and I would like to see family courts give custody to the better parent, which is sometimes the father, in which case the mother pays child support.
It shouldn't exist. The law should be that parents have equal responsibility to take care of their children as in equal supervision time. When the kids are with the mom, she raises them how she believes is appropriate and pays to house and care for them in the way she sees fit. When the kids are with the Dad, he raises them how he believes is appropriate and pays to house and care for them in the way he sees fit. If a parent is jailed for whatever reason then during their sentence they lose their parental supervision ability temporarily. Other than that, both parents should be involved and bearing the burden of time and money for their own genetic children. No parent should be allowed to rob the other parent via the state to make a living. A criminal government, that conspires with a criminal parent to steal from another person is in the wrong...
The current systems throughout the West have been designed by misandrists who want to destroy men.
Child support is awarded without regard to the actual cost of raising the child, capacity to pay, or whether or not a child is the biological child of a man.
The systems have been designed to enable and reward paternity fraud.
A fair system would have:
1. A DNA test to establish paternity.
2. A cap on payments, as per a scale published by the government, which was based on actual costs.
3. The money paid into a Visa/ Mastercard debit card that could be spent only on clothing, food, education, medical, dental expenses for the child.
4. Women who attempted paternity fraud sent to prison for years for financial fraud.
I see it as a way for women to get more money without working that they should not be entitled to. If you are referring to support for the government then it should be means tested and in the forms of vouchers so as to stop the mother or father using it for themselves.
Where i live in the UK so many parents spend it on booze and drugs. Also women having the kid and then dumping the father to get even more money is a problem.
Fathers should not have to pay out unless they have equal access and full say in the childs upbringing, plus if the mother tricks them into getting her pregnant, then they should get nothing.
I see your point about a girl tricking the guy, as that does happen, but the dad does have the option to not pay child support and help raise the kid.
So it being a way for women to scam men out of money isn't exactly a fair argument if the guy refuses to be help support the child in other ways
And he also has the option to wear a condom and not blow his load inside her
@WanderingLoveWizard That is not always an option here in the UK. A father still has to pay support even if he can't access his kid.
I don't support it unless the parent that is charged with paying it has been abusive and has been proven to have been doing so under a court of law. Especially if the parent that has filed the divorce doesn't have the other parent as the reason for leaving. If you leave your spouse for reasons other than violence or cheating, you should be leaving everything about that spouse behind and take nothing with.
If the parent really cared about the child, they doesn't need the government to fund the current guardian of that child, they can do it themselves. If the parent of custody is making it obvious that they are abusing this generosity for their own personal gain, the provider should have the right to stop funding that parent.
My Dad had court ordered child support to pay and we never received a penny from him.
My ex-husband was ordered by the court to pay child support after he cheated on me and abandoned us and never paid his child support either.
So, you want to ask me about child support do you? It is just two empty words with no real life meaning.
No one ever went after either of them either. I called the department of child support and still never saw a penny.
I think it makes sense, but it's definitely not something I ever want to be wrapped up in.
If I ever accidentally get a girl pregnant (God forbid), and the girl refuses to abort it, then I guess I'm a daddy now and I'm gonna help raise the little fucker.
At least then I could kind of control how much money I spend on it, instead of $1,200 - $2,000 a month (or whatever ridiculous amount it is) that I don't have for child support
I say it is great if they want the child, but if someone does not want the child, they should not have to pay it. It should not be forced on someone who never wanted a child, nor if caught a cheating spouse who because he is married to her now has to pay child support when he gets divorced.
Unless we talk from the state it shouldn't be needed, both parents should share costudy of the children and pay their share when they have care of the kids. Removing costudy from a parent should require criminal level of neglect or other improper handling of the kid.
Child support should be paid by absent parents. It shouldn't be paid by parents that are already taking care of their children simply because they have the child one or two days a week less than the other parent.
agreed. And mothers shouldn't be able to use child support as a means to alienate the father.. You would not believe how often i hear my best friends ex tell him "You didn't pay on time so you dont get to see your son for a few months." and the courts do NOTHING about this. And the police see this as a civil matter.
yup. Title IV-D...
I believe joint custody should be the base standard and should only differ from that if there is a legit reason.
I think there should be some reasonable base level. It isn't super expensive. None of this stuff where someone makes a lot of money so child support goes way up.
When child support is used correctly it’s a great thing but I keep seeing more and more of women just using it as a free pay check.
Child support is for the child. Think clothes, school supplies, toys, holiday gifts, college savings and a steady supply of food for their growth. It’s not for purses, jewelry, makeup, alcohol and fancy perfumes.
In other words child support is to support the child
There are a lot of men who consider themselves victims of an unjust system because they are ordered to support the children they chose to have. They view child support as “extortion” instead of taking care of their responsibilities to their children. Some men hate paying child support!
Sometimes it’s more than it should be, it’s also not right that they base it on our gross income not our net, we never get our gross income so they are actually getting more than they should when they take a certain percentage and base it off of that so what 29% of the gross is like 50% of the paycheck coming out. This happened to me for years living off of half a paycheck
Her body, her choice, her responsibility.
I think if the father has no say in anything they should at least be given the ability to walk away without being forced child support.
I also think that a paternity test should be mandatory for all births and in that same regard I say FUCK France for making paternity tests illegal.
Seems ridiculously high. What normal child costs more than like $200 a month? Should be capped amount.
Idgaf if your dad is bill gates or Elon musk, children need basic food and clothing. That's essentially their only costs. Anything else is just not necessary. I grew up being told to play with sticks outside. No child needs fancy ass video games and such. Child support should not be taking that crap into account.
@Apple1996 I mean so a baby eats and wears more clothes than an adult 200lb male. Even if diapers specifically were the issue... what about the 95% of the child's time as a minor when they are not wearing diapers. Back to sentence one. No normal child costs more than $200
@Apple1996 ok so for a year or two. No 7 year old eats more than a 200lb adult man unless you're abusing the child by allowing them to be obese or feeding them caviar.
@Apple1996 I mean that's not scientifically possible. That a 6 year old eats more than a 200lb athlete. Unless it's fancy or convenience food. I eat very healthy so in some ways it's more expensive and some ways less than convenience food. But if the choice is spend $400 a month on a child to eat unhealthy or $100 for a child to eat healthy... seems like a no Brainer for what's best for the child. And that is supposed to be the whole point of court intervention in the first place.
Unhealthy food is cheaper and healthy food is more expensive so those prices would be flipped. Adults maintain a weight and eat the same everyday while kids are rapidly growing by the day and they are very active so they need more as they grow. Child support is a failed system since it's barely covering anything for the child
@Apple1996 general searching says kids need about 1700 to 2000 calories while myself weighing at 195lbs and working out 6 days a week calorie calculator says I need 2857 calories.
I spend like $50 a week at most on groceries. Big bag of rice big thing of noodles big pack of chicken big pack of ground beef. Rest goes to fruits and veggies.
Tbh I think convenience foods mostly cost more and that's why. Because my girlfriend is like 115lbs and she mostly likes more normal diet stuff and her shit is expensive as he'll in my opinion but I don't know specifics enough to discuss her grocery budget and diet.
@Apple1996 ok but it's also support. Not pay for everything. The only necessities are food and clothes basically if they don't have any medical issues. So even if food and clothes was $600 it should be less than that since it's just additional support. The problem is women are getting awarded $1000 or more. Wtf. No child comes close to that it's ridiculous.
@Apple1996 literally the woman gets paid to take care of her own child. Ought she get paid to wipe her own ass too?
Depends, if a woman has a low income and needs help and the father isn’t doing anything then he should be on child support but if a woman is making 6 figures and is fully capable of supporting the child then it doesn’t make sense to put the father on child support
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