"Manliness" has been well described throughout the ages. A man is supposed to be strong (physically and mentally), brave, capable, courageous, etc. Examples include: Going back to the beginning, the epidemy of Greek mythology being Heracles (better known as Hercules), Beowulf, William Wallace, and nearly every action hero in Hollywood.
Femininity, at least to me, is a little bit harder to describe. While the list of adjectives for masculinity is rather short, there is a quite long list of characters (both real and fictitious) describing people's ideal of masculinity. One of the great things that feminism did was help describe various attributes for women to strive towards; and by describe I mean partially completely redefine. Things like confidence and independence, while being positive traits in women today, are not really tied in with femininity. The only traits that I really tie into femininity are loving and caring, and perhaps grace. The best example I can think of being Florence Nightingale.
I'm basically trying to redefine it for a modern period, but I keep running back into gender roles. Things like "lady-like" (which is more behavior than anything), supportive of your husband, knowing what doesn't concern you (yes I went there, I'm sorry), and even fragility. While they might not be associated with it today, all were historically. So I ask now, trying to steer away from these, what do you consider to be distinctly feminine traits. As listed before I got loving, caring, and grace.
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I think that today women need to have the ability to take care of themselves, but that doesn't mean that if we want a man that we can't choose to have one and even choose to and naturally depend on him for some things (or in some cases even all things, I still value the idea of a woman not working in order to take care of small children if it is financially possible for the couple). That is the changes from the old ideas of frailty (which most women are whether they want to admit it or not) and being loving and caring and having grace.
While I agree with you for the most part, I think you've kinda missed the point of my question. What do you think femininity consists of? Or what attributes do you think are thought of as being feminine?
I explained what I think femininity is.