Are men's standards too low or are women's standards too high?

[TedStar]

It is known that most women have a longer "laundry list" of criteria for a good man than men have for a good woman. In terms of the everyday person are the mens standards low and therefore include more women or are women's standards too high and are excluding too many guys.

POLL: Who is closer to the realistic mark in terms of available people

Men standards are closer to realistic/womens standards are too high

Women are closer to realistic/ mens standards are too low

Updates

+1 y

Ooh one star! Extra points for me :D

[Theguyoverthere]

I think the main problem is what the standards are based on. I'm going with women's standards being too high and I'll elaborate.

Too many men let looks control them. I'm not referring to guys being too uptight about looks. I'm referring to how many girls look good and have a shitty self-entitled attitude and get away with using sexual appeal for personal gain.

Now honestly, most men's standards in looks are not that high. Most women who have good bodies don't work out and just barely eat. The problem is, at least in the US. Obesity is so fricken big! Once a guy's standards in physical attraction is met, the rest can be focused on. Most men are very laid back about a girl's personality and very accepting. Personally, most of the flaws in a girl are forgivable and easily worked out.

Now... after reading endless dating profiles I will tell you most women's standards in men are based on what he has to offer to her, not who he is! This is the major problem. Girls want to know what a guy has. Does he have a house? Does he have a high end degree? Does he have a career? How much money does he have? Can she have a child with him? I never see guys looking at girls in this manner! I literally see "laundry lists" at the ends of their profiles and they even dismiss guys who don't have the exact haircut she wants.

The more the guy has, the more appealing he is. Having a good body definitely helps for a guy but look I see far too many girls chasing guys just because he has money, or a house, and so on. A girl will find out a guy has a house and she'll get all excited... he asks "Why?" suddenly she's quiet.

[TedStar]

With regards to being accepting, are we accepting quality or mediocrity? Women's standards have to be high for a reason.

Are they trying to push men to be better than we currently are by having high standards? <----what do think about that

[Theguyoverthere]

I feel men accept women's flaws very well. It doesn't mean the "standards" get lower. It means we like them for who they are. Improvement can always come in time if needed on a severe issue.

Women are not trying to push men to be better. Those type that do are looking to feel valuable by being able to go back to their friends and claim they turned their boyfriend into this new person. A common reason we have so many "girls date jerks" topics going around.

[TedStar]

I also feel that even if we were to reach the higher standard, the bar would be raised again. Almost as though the exclusivity of finding a rare good man trumps finding a common good man

[Koldhearted]

Mens standards are to low. We gotta start to care about more than just looks.

I mean she's still gotta be a 10 but needs to work and do other things I'd Be expected to do/bring into a relationship.

[523206720]

A lot of men have high standards for woman - not everybody lowers their standard for the woman. I knew a guy who only had a job - and his girlfriend was working full time, studying full time, working out in the gym all the top, eating like a bird, wore a size 0 - and he tried to cheat on her with another woman but got rejected by the girl he wanted to cheat with. Also he weighed 300 pounds but he made around $500 000+ a year. I'm not sure how much they made but when she got married (about 3 months after she found out he tried to cheat on her) - her wedding dress cost $100 000 dollars. I think she made around $200 000 but she was going to school full time while making this money. She also went sky diving and bundy jumping and parachuting and dipping in the arctic ocean as well - all to convince her boyfriend that she was a brave person who loved life and when they first started dating she was anorexic for 2-3 years at around 85 pounds.

[Allycja]

I'd just like to say that most woman have a "fantasy guy"; someone who exists only in a perfect world. Obviously this world is far from that and many of us woman understand that; we don't stay single until the perfect guy picks us up (those of us who are decent anyways). The thing is, we put so much more effort into our appearances than guys do; some guys won't even pick up a comb much less try to dress well. These same guys won't give girls who aren't considered hot a second look. I feel that it's the opposite of what you're. I don't have a problem with my appearance now (lost all the baby fat and stuff) but a couple years ago no guy would give me the time of day (due to high standards I'm assuming), and now it's exactly the opposite.

I don't think this is a theory that can be generalized. Not all men only go for women who are perfect and not all women only go for perfect men.

[TedStar]

Thanks for your articulate response. I'm talking about overall standards. Guys will say that they want a hot chick, but after that our standards are almost non-existent. I feel that women are more stringent in what they want/need from a guy overall. I just want to know whether guys should also get stricter or women should loosen up

[Allycja]

I think it's about equal actually. Both genders need to lower their standards.

[TedStar]

But looks aside, if guys had to lower their standards they would be totally non exisitent

[Allycja]

I disagree. Just because you have specific standards does not mean that every guy shares those same standards.

[TedStar]

Okay. I'm just talking from my perspective as a guy and the many men I'm acquainted to. Generalizations are not always good, but these are patterns I've seen with the boys/men around me

[Allycja]

Well you might just be one of the good ones then!

[Anonymous]

Most people's standards are fine...

On this board, both sexes are going to say that the opposite sex has standards are too high. If we were good at dating, we wouldn't be skulking about here.

[Anonymous]

women's standards are too low. they'll date the tool that isn't going anywhere in life over the good guy that is. looks, even personality matters to a point but they shouldn't completely cloud your judgment of someone. you have to see someone for all they have to offer, both now and in the future. a lot of the good guys, nice guys, whatever you want to call them, aren't even that physically unattractive. they might not be unattractive at all. they're a lot more intelligent and sociable. they are more considerate and polite and they have what it takes to move up in today's society.

unfortunately women think that a guy being all tough means that he will take care of them, which is seldom true. those kind of guys never had a proper upbringing and if he's always got a chip on his shoulder and something to prove, he probably brings a lot of trouble on himself and he's only going to drag the girl into it. men like that are incapable of properly caring for a woman by today's standards.

I'm starting to wonder with the way women are as of late, do they have the capacity to see the world for what it is, and choose better for themselves? they're so spoiled rotten that they think everything is going to work out for them how they want it to when it won't. the world is what the world is, but they keep making the same mistakes again and again. I'm talking about good girls too, that have grown up privileged and in ideal home environments. maybe they're just out dating around because they can, but they act serious enough about it.

the most disturbing thing about it too is they genuinely seem to think they're settling for a guy that is ultimately their equivalent. their standards are low but somehow their egos have been over inflated at the same time.

tl;dr: women are crazy. lol

[Opinion Owner]

btw 5 stars for you. it's a very real problem.

[TedStar]

interesting.So you are saying that women's "high"standards are actually "low " standards? Thank for the hand. These are the questions that need answers!

[Opinion Owner]

it's all interpretive. people can think about it in different ways. that's just how I see it. I take the facts and reach a logical conclusion. a lot of girls will argue differently in their own defense but when you see things happen the same way over in over again, that's all the proof I need to be able to justify my viewpoint.

all these females really need to pull themselves together. it's not fun having to sit around and wait for them to come to their senses when they're smarter than that.

[Anonymous]

Men's standards are too low. Many men feel that having an attractive woman on their arm are a symbol of success and therefore would select the most attractive woman that's available to them as their companion, regardless of her credentials. It's not a coincidence that a beauty wjom works at a hot dog stand and barely getting by will often have more suitors than a average looking business woman making six figures.

[Anonymous]

None . Neither are true

[TedStar]

Why? I need the why's?