#LoveYourself
VALENTINE'S DAY

Being Single Doesn't Mean I Am Lonely

This is for the beautiful and amazing single people:

A letter from my 19 year old self.

I have to admit I get a little jealous when I see my friends with their s/o but then I see them going through some problems that a single person doesn't have to deal with so I feel a little better lol.

Being Single Doesn't Mean I Am Lonely

When you're single, you don't expect a good morning or goodnight text or have to send it. You have all the bed to yourself. Nobody needs to grab the covers away from you on a cold night. You can go to sleep peacefully knowing that nobody's cheating on you. You can go on a date with yourself anytime, anywhere you want. You can talk to whoever you want without anybody getting jealous or going crazy. Your phone is on 100% battery all day because it's dry af since nobody is going to blow it up with texts. You can go grab food without arguments of what to eat or where to eat.

Being Single Doesn't Mean I Am Lonely

You can eat in peace without anybody getting mad because they didn't get the food that they want. You can eat all you want without feeling guilty of not saving anyone some of it or sharing. You can play your games all day long in peace because nobody is going to complain about not giving them attention. Or you can buy all the makeup you want without anybody questioning, "don't you have enough?" You can dress sexy, quirky or be your weird self without anyone telling you to cover yourself up or ask "are you going to go out looking like that?"

You can go take your friends out or go out by yourself for a drive and discover the world one day at a time without feeling bad about it since you don't have to update someone of your whereabouts. You can go out clubbing, dance like no one's watching, and sing your heart out to karaoke without anyone getting embarrassed of your out-of-tune talent.

Being single is not a curse. It is a blessing that you are saving yourself for someone out there who is worth it to give your singleness away.

I don't know why people think being single is bad. It is not bad at all. It doesn't mean you are not worth loving or wanting, or that you're too picky or your standards are way too high. You choose to be single because you want to enjoy your life without needing anyone to complete it. You are confident your love will come your way when the time is right.

Valentine's Day or not, you have yourself to love and can spread that love to those who don't get any. Smile. You never know when someone is falling in love with your smile. :)

Happy Valentine's Day everyone. :D

Being Single Doesn't Mean I Am Lonely

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Pinay_ako is a GirlsAskGuys Editor
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Most Helpful Girl

  • A big thank you for this take! You just listed all the reasons why I want to stay single for rest of my life (I haven't ever been in relationship tho)
    The sad part is that not so many of my friends can't accept that I'm going to be single for the rest of my life. Every time when me and my friend/s talk about dating and I say I want to be single forever they all be like: You never know... You will find someone''
    And that is SO annoying! Of course I can't see in future but if I want to stay single why people can't accept that and respect my choice? It's not like it will affect in their lives. Ugh. That's why I try to avoid relationship topics they makes me feel uncomfortable :(

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What Guys Said 47

  • Good take, I feel it needed to be said. I'm single and I'm not the least bit sad or lonely. I'm single by choice, at this point in time, I've simply chosen to focus on myself and my own aspirations. And thus far, I'm satisfied and happy with that choice. Eventually, I'll make strides to start dating and whatnot again, but for now, I'm going to continue doing me. I think my choice will lead to much healthier and more fulfilling relationships in the long run.

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  • People need to realize that they can't truly be good partners if they can't stand on their own two feet. If someone feels a *need* for a boyfriend/girlfriend then must find their will first. A person should always have a mental place they can fall back on to enter near perfect calm with ironclad determination.

    Determination, people need to strengthen their resolves, but life being easy has weakened such a thing.

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  • Eventually that stuff gets old and you do get lonely. I have not been dating much in the last two years. But the dating world is very different for women then men. Men don't get a thousand messages every day if they are online, women do. So your alone by choice. Women can get free nights out almost anytime. Men are expected to initiate the meeting, pick where to go, and pay for everything. Dating is a different world for men and women.

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  • Very good points. To me the best plus you pointed out was being able to go out with friends or anyone else without having to let your partner know or clear it with their schedule.

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  • No worries.

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  • Absolutely Amazingggg!!!
    Really really loved this take
    Thanks alot😊

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  • More likely someone that can handle all your quirks. :)

    Single people always make all kinds of excuses. The truth is they secretly wish they could find mr./ms. right and get something going.

    But alas, it's great if you can make yourself happy - that's the FIRST step in a successful relationship. Each has to be able to stand on their own two feet.

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  • it's okay to be single rather than being in a relation ship with the wrong person , you just have to wait for the right one other wise i see it's fine to be single

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  • Damn i been single for so long, idgaf about no realtionships all them days are normal to me. The Only girl who gets me Right is first name Bombay last name Saphire

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  • This is very beautiful, & a very good take. I enjoyed all of it until this part "You choose to be single because you want to enjoy your life without needing anyone to complete it". I don't choose to be single & I don't enjoy my life!

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    • You can choose to be single when you decide to leave a toxic relationship or be in one when the love is only one sided. Being single is a choice yes. You can be with someone for the purpose of the fear of being alone is a no win. Being married or being with someone is a choice. Walking away from a relationship is a choice too.

  • I'm single right now and I'm not going to lie, I'm fucking lonely. Despite getting lots of flings lately I really miss what I had a few years ago.

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  • Being single doesn't mean that you can't bang it out on Valentine's Day if the opportunity presents itself... πŸ˜‰ LOL

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  • it does gets lonely, after some years, if you still stay single

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  • I think it's important to be happy regardless are you in a relationship or not.

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  • I think that this is pathetic. Sure there are some advantages in being single. But God created us to have a partner. So it's okay to be single but not a final state I would accept.

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  • I agree. I've been single for quite a long time, but In all facets of my life and daily social interaction, i am quite happy.

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  • Great Take and something that is much needed to be said.πŸ‘

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  • Depends on why you are single and for how long. I have lots of friends, I'm always with them, and yet I always feel alone.

    27, never had a relationship, not my choice.

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  • Nice take... good pionts and you really have sense humor.

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  • TL;DR = sour grapes

    Almost had me fooled though.

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What Girls Said 23

  • Yep there are some differences between single and relationship life, mine is ldr and we meet few times and it is a bit hard for me, sometimes really feeling lonely...
    But I love him and I'm happy anyway and imagining my life without him is impossible for me, it would feel really sad...
    That is me, it doesn't have to be the same for everyone, either single or in a relationship, everyone is awesome and deserve happiness <3

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  • EVERYTHING YOU SAID IS TRUE. I MEAN YOU CAN'T EXPECT ANYONE TO LOVE YOU IF YOU DO NOT LOVE YOURSELF.

    AND NO ONE IS FALLING IN LOVE WITH MY SMILE WHEN IT LOOKS LIE THIS

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    • that dog lol

    • Show All
    • love it. lol. that's my face when I get emotional when people do nice things for me unexpectedly lol

    • I want to add this
      i'm not really single, i'm dating myself. I take myself out to eat, i buy myself clothes, i love me and i am awesome

  • Great take Ms Pinay.
    I LOVE IT!
    That took a lot of time, effort and thought to put all that together.
    I am very proud of your hard work and great job!

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  • Sometimes, when I feel bad for being single, I think of exactly what you said. Sometimes it helps, sometimes it doesn't. There is one thing though that I definitely agree with; "Being single is not a curse. It is a blessing that you are saving yourself for someone out there who is worth it to give your singleness away."

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  • Thank you so much for making this post! One Valentine's Day that I remember is where I went to the mall and saw 50 Shades of Grey all by myself! I got all dolled up and tried to look really submissive. It was my first R movie by myself! I might have got something nice to eat too, I cannot remember! :p I agree though that being single isn't always bad. If you don't have someone... be glad you don't have the WRONG person :) !

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  • I'm not an expert but I think only people who can handle loneliness should be in romantic relationships because when you are caring for a sick spouse or nursing a new born child - you are going to go through periods where you have nobody to talk to because of your social obligations.

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  • I will say this: being single is about 100000% better than being with the wrong person. There are so many weirdos and losers in the dating market that it's better to fly solo until you find the right person.

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  • I use to feel lonely for being single. I started to feel that being single for so long meant no one wanted to me. I never thought before that it was a decision or choice. I thought if no one wanted to date me something was wrong with me.

    But, now I'm happy to be single so that I can be whole for the right person that come into my life that I CHOOSE that is right for me to date or be in a relationship with.

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  • I've been single by choice and had plenty of time to focus on myself and tend to my needs. I don't believe the saying that "for every pot there is a lid" - during my time as a single person, I lived life fully expecting the possibility that I might live it alone. Well, not really alone. I have great friends and a wonderful family. There are many ways not to be lonely. I know you can say, "but you found someone after that, so it doesn't count"... well, I didn't find, it was more like a mutual, suddenly there it was. And it certainly wasn't expected. Nor was I afraid of it not happening. I agree that good relationships often happen like that - instead of trying to plug a hole in your planet, you end up fully intact and in orbit with someone else.

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  • you just don't NEED to be always in a relationship. it's like avoiding to face yourself, to grow up or just exist by yourself.

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  • from a single person, this is really nice! Thank you :)

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  • Not sounding honest but more like a justification, don't stress yourself πŸ‘Œ

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  • Nice take

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  • Hahahahah good

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  • Being single not an bad idea πŸ’‘

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  • Very true!

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  • Very true! Great take

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  • Its true... nice take

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  • yep being alone does not have to = being lonely

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  • You is awesome!

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