If my ex boyfriend REALLY wanted to be back with me, wouldn't he do what it takes? Call me and tell me? All he has said so far is that he "was stupid." I know he's not over me yet and he is regretting. I dumped him but I want him back.
How do ex boyfriends who have been dumped try to get their ex girlfriends back? Would you do whatever it took or not because your more cautious? Help please!
Update: All of your comments are very insightful... thank you! =]
5 months ago
I've been dumped over 10 times by the same girl... why do I keep getting myself into the situation over and over again, it's simple, I love her, and I will endure the emotional ups and downs so long as in the end I am still with her. But having said that guys will not intrude on a girl that has rejected them, we feel like "If I'm not good enough for you, then why should I harass you and belittle myself begging for you back?" Even if he loves you and wants you back, he will do everything he can to "man up" and honor your wishes, you know the ones you demonstrated when you dumped him...yea those wishes. If you want him back then you will have to make amends with him, if you do and are sincere about it, and he loves you, then he will welcome you back with open arms. Good luck.
Well if you dumped him I'm assuming it was for a good reason. Why would you want him back?
If he is really serious he could be acting calm about it as to prevent himself from getting hurt further, or even hurting you anymore. If he thinks you're over him then he could be hoping that by telling you these things you will admit some similar feelings to him before he asks for you back.
But the real questions remain. Why did you dump him? Does he deserve another chance? Why do you want him back?
We act like we don't care because if we fight for you, you take that as a ego boost and play hard to get, its better if we ignore you and you figure out what the h*ll you did and beg for us back lol.
Why would you want him back if you dumped him? haha
I miss him. How do I know that he's over me? I initiate the talking almost all the time but he does give long answers like he's still interested. - 4 months ago
Answerer
If you want him back I would suggest you take a chance and ask him that "we should hang out sometime" and if he agrees to it you should plan something, maybe go to a park or somewhere were you two can talk.There's always a chance he may still interested but you never know until you guys hang out together, but if he says he's too busy then you got your answer. - 4 months ago
You dumped him, but you want him to fight for you? How does that make ANY sense at all? YOU dumped HIM! You rejected him-- in his mind, there's nothing to fight for, because you don't want him.
If you want him back, you have to TELL him. As of now, all he knows is that you DON'T want him!
I agree. When girls do that stuff it confuses me. Maybe just because I'm not like that. But I agree. I'm not gunna waste time fighting for a guy that has made it abundantly clear that he doesn't want me. So why should he fight for you when you made it clear to him that you don't want him. You want him back? Ask him out to dinner and tell him you'd like to sit down and talk. Then tell him that YOU made a stupid mistake and would like another chance. Be humble. - 3 months ago
The last break up I went through, I was the one who got dumped. Of course I wanted to be with my ex at the time and wanted to call her begging her to come back to me, but I of course didn't because I didn't want to seem like I was being a freaky stalker ex boyfriend. So I just acted like I was giving up on the whole thing. Though I did attempt to stay on somewhat of a friendly basis so if she decided she wanted to work things out I would be there willing to talk about it. We actually talked a month later and she said basically the same thing that you did. She said she wanted me to call her and talk things out with her a lot sooner instead of waiting so long. Of course guys are not mind readers so the best course of action would to not play dumb little games and just be straight forward with your ex about the problems you thought were the reason for your break up.
Well, it depends upon the guy and the circumstances leading to teh breakup. What caused you two to part ways in the first place? He might not know what to say, or perhaps he's still trying to decide if he wants a second try or if calling it quits was the right choice. How long has it been since you broke up, and for what reason? You left out several crucial details.
Don't assume a guy is going to do whatever it takes because most guys believe that when a girl says she's through, that he has no chance. I'd bet there are a ton of guys who still want to be with their ex-girlfriend but don't try to because they don't want to be labeled a stalker or something like that.
Stop thinking that life is some kind of Hallmark moment when the guy FIGHTS for the girl back. If you want it to work then you need to talk to him maturely about it.
Well, in my opinion, if YOU were the dumper, then I think it has to be you who has to turn things up side down and ask him back. Yes you would love for him to ask you back, but really, it was your decision to break things off. You have to be the one to set things right now. But if you really want him back, you should rethink why you want him (you miss him, etc. but there has to be more reasons) and see if he had changed those qualities that you disliked/had problems with that set you to dump him.
I am in the situation of your boyfriend as I was dumped. At first--- I would constantly call him but he would not budge. Well, guess what? I realized well, if I tried, I can't change his mind. He's the one who didn't want me so why should I try anymore. So it's actually going to be his (the dumper's) turn to get back his ex. You're the one regretting it (my ex was regretting it). So now HE had to be the one to ask me back, to make plans, to somehow change and show me he wants me back. You already know he loves you. My ex already knew I loved him so much. I even made it obvious by being all mopey at a point that I just gave up trying to get him to talk to me.
So lesson learned; if you dump the person, you have to reclaim what's yours. If the person was dumped, they have to be fought for. So if you don't want to do the dirty work, I suggest you should have been dumped by your boyfriend. lol
Gosh I have always told my ex "if you REALLY loved me and REALLY wanted to be with me and not lose me you would be here FIGHTING for me". He said that he is too hard headed and stubborn to do that and that yes if I was with another dude then that's what I should mean by fighting for me. But to me that's a crock of crap any man who really loves you will do anything you ask to be with you.
...any man who really loves you will do anything you ask to be with you.
This is one of the most horrible things I've ever read. That's not love, it's exploitation. I don't expect any man or woman to do "anything I ask." - 2 months ago
i know a situation..my guy now had a girl this was before we know each other..this girl broke up with him because she can't deal with him always jealous.this girl has drug issues and he just want her t be better.but the girl can't change so she dumped him.
he was so angry and didn't talk to her for long.he started looking somewhere and that's how we met.but the girl kept trying to get him back,this girl is sexy.but still he was hurt and didn't wanna talk to her.when we started to get serious that's when he talks to her again.this girl wants him back more,but he is into to me now.
my point is if you hurt this guy he do not feel the urge to do something to get you back.guys have huge ego issues.what to do is really start over as friends like how you met before and do it the different way,maybe the old way didn't work so try new.do not wait for him to find someone else of corz.guys that are hurt wanted love fast.so they are vulnerable to girls.meaning they tend to date another girl again that fast.and eventually forgets the girl who hurt them.
well, it might be a dumb thing called pride. it depends on the situation. does he know you well and how long was the relaitonship?
well, it never hurted to talk it over if both of you want to get together again. I think he might be afraid of getting hurt or he's scared of you or he's listening to his friends who are telling him to move on and forget this situation. so maybe text him to see if you two can talk and be emotionally calm about it, work things out, present the issues you gotto work over and do that. see how that goes. good luck
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