Is there any hope for ugly guys?

Honestly, if you are unhappy with any one aspect of yourself, change it. In this day and age, you have far more options than anyone else. But in truth, just because you think you are ugly doesn't mean the whole world sees you that way. There isn't a single person on this earth everyone finds unattractive. I bet there's a girl out there secretly pining over you without the guts to tell you. Don't change who you are for other people, if you feel you need to make a change in any direction, do it for yourself. The socially awkward part is going to count against you far more than anything physical. If you can learn to be confident and assertive, that will be far more noticeable. No one wants to be with someone who feels sorry for themselves or doesn't like themself, no matter what they look like. There's nothing wrong with you being 19 and waiting to find someone special. Regardless of physicality, people do that. 19 isn't even that old, why get a hooker when you could wait for someone that really cares about you? Patience, man. Nothing you described is unworkable. Fat? Gym. Acne? Proactive. Greasy? Proactive. Long-haired? Haircut. I know a guy (one of my best friends, actually) who was everything you've described. After he got tired of feeling bad for himself, he dropped 180 pounds through gym and exercise in a two-year period, got braces, dyed his hair and cut it short, used skin cream, developed new hobbies and interests he could feel good about, and he's a total chick magnet now. True story. If you want it, it's yours. If you devoted this much time to feeling bad, why can't you spare the time to feel good and start building confidence by being the person you want to be? Nothing's set in stone, my friend. It takes work, but so does anything of value, and what's better than realizing your true potential? You have NOTHING to lose by this and everything to gain.

Many of us suffer from lack of confidence and I can totally empathize with you.

First, please know that most smart and caring women will look past your appearance and into your heart. That is really, really true. I have been surprised by the very short, bald, mexican, you name it almost - that I have been seriously attracted to.

As a woman I can only suggest to you 2 things:

1) Clean up your act. You say you have acne, greasy, long hair? Get a hair cut, wash your hair everyday and go to a dermatologist. Even the worst acne cases can be cured. Get a good hairdresser. Make sure your clothes are clean, pressed, shoes clean and nice. Take pride in your appearance and spend some money taking care of your appearance. If you don't know what to do or need help - research looks on line etc.

2) For weight - I suffer from being overweight myself and it has been a constant struggle. It is something we can control though - so you can change it. You don't have to have a six pack abs - you just need to look like you take care of yourself (just as women do). A lot of women like a man who looks like he eats! (if only it was the same for men to women!)

3) Don't change your personality for anyone you are attracted to. Stay yourself. Someday there will be a girl who sees past everything and can only see your big heart. And I'm not just saying that! (cause I'm more of a realist than an optimist - but I know that someone will see you for who you are one day and love you).

Good luck!

Hi. I just want to say that I am a 21 year old girl and I used to be a lot like you. I too spent all my life being socially awkward, painfully shy, and believing that I was ugly. I als have never kissed anyone before. In the past few months I have had a complete life breakthrough without therapy or medication.

I took a risk. I took a huge, scary risk and moved to the college dorms. I almost had a mental breakdown in the first week. I called my mom at midnight crying, I cried in front of my roomate during our first conversation, and I almost went home. But instead I decided to stick it out and my entire life has changed.

The first piece of advice I can give you is to start thinking positive things about yourself, strangers, and life in general. Just start thinking positive even if it feels corny and even if it feels like you are lying to yourself. Eventually it will start to feel true. The first step to happiness is realizing that there is nothing wrong with you and that the world is not out to get you. Just start thinking positive and literally tell yourself to shut up when those negative thoughts come in your head.

Next, take a step. Any step. You need to start putting yourself in situations that are not actually dangerous, and yet you are afraid of. I joined a club at school. I almost didn't because I was scared of the other people not liking me. I paced back and forth in front of the door to the club meeting before I finally convinced myself that I was strong enough to go in there. I took a step, and the club meeting turned out to be really nice. You can take big steps like moving into the dorms or small steps like attending a meeting, but you have to do the things that scare you. Its the only way.

I promise you that you are nowhere near as far gone or bad as you think you are. You just need to start putting some faith in yourself and the good in the world. Of course there are jerks ou there and of course life can suck sometimes, but we can't spend our lives being scared of every worst case scenario. Its all about attitude and perception. I really feel for you because you remind me of myself and how I was just a few months ago. Just start surrounding your life with positivity and things will get better.

I used to be suicidal back in the day. Now the thing that makes m saddest is thinkg about how mean I used to be to myself and how much I repressed myself. . I promise that there is nothing wrong with you. :)

zombieland should cheer you up :)

I'm sorry. How come some people are born beautiful without trying and others like you have this extra battle to fight? And why are preople so shallow? I've read post after post about how what's really important is what's on the inside. But what people really mean is that they'd love to date someone beautiful first, and then check to see if they're beautiful on the inside too.

This is my advise: forget about yourself. Pour yourself into those who are to be pittied much much more than you. There are orphans, sick, abused, homeless people filling the world. There are gradeschool children without a chance becasue no one will help them learn to read. There are war vets comming home with PTSD and no job waiting for them here. There are drug addicts who know they're ruing their life and can't stop. You complain about your acne, but at least you have legs to walk! at least you don't have cystic fibrosis and can breath!

I do not believe we are tempted and challenged beyond what we can endure. You are stong enough to overcome this. And when you are older, and the acne goes away, you'll be able to look back on all the work you've done for others with your lonely years, and know you didn't waste in pity parties. You can beat this! Pour your hurt out into compassion for others who hurt, and not only will you forget about your own hurt for a while, you will make yourself a better person. And I promise you, 6 years from now your acne will be gone (or you'll have the money for acutane - damn expensive but very effective), you'll be a stong selfless person who will be very, very, attractive to women, and respected by men who can see your strength of will.

A story: my freshman roomate had no friends from gradeschool up. She wasn't fat, but she had BAD acne, and was very awkward, and has ADHD. She had such low self-estime she couldn't make eye contact (even with me and I'm not that intimidating!)...she is the most compassionate person I know. She volunteers at a hopital in the city playing with the child patients. Last Thursday she spent 3 hours just bathing, dressing, and ammusing a 4 year old child whose throat was so bad it couldn't swollow or talk, and needed a feeding tube strait though her side into her stomach =( Liz wouldn't be the compassionate person she is now unless she had to endure her high school years. She got a boyfriend last summer...you won't be alone for forever you know. So while you're waiting for you woman, who IS out there (you're a bit young to dispair) spend these lonely days moulding yourself into the best person you know how to be. (and you don't have to go play with 4 year olds. do something more manly if you want)

well that attitude twards yourself wil never help I hate to say ... and no just because you have a skin problem and are heavier than most doesn't mean you won't ever find "the one" or even date ... for instance my current boyfirend and I have been together for 4 years and we have a beautiful baby girl together ... when I first met him we were in high school and I was one of the popular girls and he was a nerd someone I would of got made fun of for talking to ... the tipical glasses zit face guy he was ... and iw as the pretty close to perfect girl ... he would always follow me to my classes basically stalk me and he annoyed me ... I would tell him off and everything preppy girls do in school to the not so popular kids I did to him ... well after a year or two ... we actually started hanging out where none of my firends would see us ... and I became really attracted to him ... he may have had big dorky glasses and a face full of zits and greasy hair ... but the way he talked to me made me feel terrific about myself ...then he started dating another girl that's when I knew how I really felt about him I was unbelievably jelouse ... I made him break up with this girl for me ... and here we are ... he still has his zit face and glasses and I love him more than ever ... so don't act like a charity case because your not ... there's nothing wrong with you ... nothing at all ... act alittle more confident even if you don't feel it just act it ... girls like a confident guy ... not cocky! I promise you will find somone ... my boyfirend found me ...

Love, to some girls, looks really don't matter.
I mean if I get to know a guy that's really sweet to me and treats me well and is what I need him to be in my life, how could I turn that down?
I've often thought about this scenario, if a cyclops with bad acne and a gut walked up to me, called me beautiful and acted like I was the only girl on earth, love me for who I was and Wanted to be with me no matter my past and my mistakes, my flaws, I'd love him for who he was too and over look the flaws, because in all reality, looks don't matter, what's on this inside is the only thing that do. Looks leave with age anyway, I don't want a good looking old Ass, I rather have my Cyclops with a gut and a good personality.
Really, don't put yourself down. Someone will love you for who you are, flaws included. (:
Don't worry, you'll find each other(:

There is hope, you just have to make the effort. Picture this for me, kay? A 50pound overweight girl at 5"6 with acne on her face and back with blackheads everywhere. Dingy blonde hair about waist-length, glasses, and bitten-off nail buds. Not to mention sarcastic as they come.

That was me two years ago. I fixed all of that by doing this and now I am in top physical condition, have too many friends that I know what to do with, in a relationship, and am happy.
1) join a sports team of some sort. For me it was cross country. Running with a team who is depending on you is much more motivating than a treadmill or running by yourself. The exercise will give you endorphants and make you feel happier. Yes there were jokes -- but after I was running circles around them it didn't matter so much.
2) AcneFree - it is the best stuff in the world. Also, put the toner in a spray bottle and put it on that way. And use a washcloth to spread the lotion - so the oils on your fingers don't get back on your face and back and where-ever
3) Use biologue products. The soap and shampoos get rid of grease
4) stay on sites like this :) people are nicer

Yes, I'm still sarcastic as hell (but that's how I like it ^_^) I cut my hair and dyed it (yay!), got contacts, and put nail polish hardener on my nails so I wouldn't chew them.

Best of luck. Wish I could be there to help, I remember how absolutley sh*tty it is. But after its all over, you'll be glad. I wanted to quit alot, oh good god. I wanted to quit everyday. But it was worth it.

All the best buddy, don't loose hope. ((Also, remember Karma. Those people are gonna get it and you'll be free!))

Of course there's hope for ugly, fat, greasy guys. That's why god made fat, ugly, greasy girls. =)

Well I'll tell you it's true. Unless you find a girl with equal looks as you it'll be hard to find anyone. Studies show that people date those that are equally as attractive as them. If you want to find a girl, first, go to the gym lose weight, go to a dermatologist to take care of your acne, start taking care of yourself, shower your "greasy" hair. People don't just start liking someone for their personality their looks have to attract them first. It's important to want to look good for the person you are with. Looks are surprisingly important to a relationship. A lot of people might disagree with me but it's true. Even to girls. Of course girls are usually more compassionate and less shallow but it's still important to them otherwise why do they even bother putting on make up? You know? Honestly dude, just start taking care of yourself and you'll find a gf, but it's not going to happen for a while if you just stay the way you are. My bestfriend since I was 2 has always been really heavy. She has now weighed over 300 pounds for years. She is stuck with this fantasy that someday some hot guy (bcuz she only fantasizes about being with super hot unattainable guys) will fall in love with her despite what she looks like. And that is just not true. I'm sorry it's just the way of the world, and humans, and all animals, the more attractive you are the better chances at mating you know lol? Not to say it's all about looks but that's what initially attracts people then they stay for personality which you have :)

just want to say you sound very self-aware, intelligent and funny and likeable.

ever heard of 'sexy ugly'? it's the term used for guys who are kind of ugly but that girls find sexy/appealing inspite of that, usually due to confidence, which you will get one day.

a lot of times, it requires a new situation and new people who accept and like you, that will give you more confidence and help you develop into your potential.

i think the most common way that people grow and develop is through their hobbies, esp if it includes the opposite sex.

do you have guy friends out of curiousity?
why makes you happy or excited in life as far as spare time activities?

I honestly doubt that you are that ugly, but once you have this idea in your mind then you are stuck with it. So, you believe that you are ugly, but thankfully for you, that more females in this world feel the same way about themselves. They want the same thing that you do and think the same thing about themselves. There is someone out their for you and is feeling the same way about themselves currently. You will find her and be head-over-heels (sorry for the girl term) when you do. Your not a helpless romantic, your a hopeful romantic.

Okay I know you don't want the "im so sorry's" so I'm not going to tell you that at all, but I can tell you that there are so many people that can relate to you whether their ugly or not whether their fat or not etc. because everyone in life struggles at least once, or for a period of time we know what your going through no ones perfect lonliness rejection feeling ugly we know.

im kinda like you too I bottle up my emotions as well and I've been where you are I was at a point where I felt so bad about myself and I felt so lonely and so worthless because I thought no one cared about me that I never even did anything but you know what I started helping myself instead of sulk in my misery and that's what you should do too. Don't hold anything in even if you have to cry for a week straight DO IT you will feel better after it lets out all of the negative emotions you feel.

CHANGE, not just for other people but for yourself I'm still in the process of doing that and I can tell you that am am happier than before. You say your fat, ugly, greasy, and you have acne yadda yadda yadda so I suppose you don't like the way you look right? Well change it. Go to the gym exercise get acne products get a hair cut get some new clothes hook yourself up don't just sit there and stare at yourself feeling bad for yourself like you can't change, YOU CAN. Think of this though, not everyone is blessed with being hot that's just the way of life. And beauty IS in the eye of the beholder so man think of it as there is someone out there in the world that thinks your the sexiest man alive and don't doubt it believe that there is someone out there for you willing to give you a chance. We are all just programed to think being hot is the best thing anyway and it isn't so don't 'want' to be the hottest guy alive just want to be you and just want to be happy. Looks aren't everything and looks don't last either think of that too, who YOU are remains when you get older and the way you look won't matter. So believe in yourself make goals for yourself and people will follow your lead sooner or later.

You need to get motivated and commited to helping yourself because no one can help you or make you feel better but youself. And I understand the fact that you can't change over night no one can but push YOURSELF try because walking around with an attitude like that does not help you. Smile even if you aren't happy I did it so you can do it don't give up on yourself get active join a sport go to church. DO something.

By the way you seem to have a great personality. Most guys in the world aren't romantic aren't nice and are just assholes. You seem like a rare type of guy so let women know who you are WE as women look deeper than just looks trust me.

Lastly I wish you the best of luck things will change for you, you will find someone to love you you will be okay I promise keep your head up keep your goals infront of you and work hard towards them best wishes to you :)

link
^ there's for emotional help...

If your looking for changing the way you look-

**loose weight. What I do to keep in shape is instead of walking from room to room is do lunges.
Even if you are as ugly as you think (which I'm doubting!) skinnier guys automaticly have more of a chance with girls.

**Wash your hair once a day if it's still greasy don't use conditioner. Cut your hair shorter.

**As for acne try accutane, I'm on it right now, it supposedly cures acne, everywhere. Just talk to your derm.

**Smile more often and, if you've noticed some of your jokes don't make people laugh (or if only guys are laughing at them) try thinking before you say things.

** when meeting new people, don't open up completly and act like you would if they were your best friend (even if you've gotten to the 'i don't give a f*** about what people say' stage) try being more reserved and working up to your full personality.

I was stunned as I read this honest question.
Based on what I read you sound like you have a dynamic personality. However, your self esteem does not sound like it's doing as it is being crushed under the weight of your concerns.

First of all, I want to let you know that anyone that ever called you ugly has issues with themself. Nobody would utter such a disgusting thing to another human being unless they themselves had a low self esteem. It's really true. It is infuriating that people say such hurtful things. Those comments can leave you second guessing yourself for a very long time. You can also cite them at a later time when things aren't going so well to justify why you've been broken up with or rejected in some way.

Now, I want to say, it is really important to women that men appear to be taking care of themselves. We do not want a man that seems to have no regard for his health. Nobody (male or female) wants to be with someone who has no regard for personal hygiene. It's not right. Women also (as a general rule) do not want fat men because they don't feel manly. They feel soft. I, for example, am a curvacious woman. My body is soft and womanly. I don't want my man to feel the same way.

You're going to have to start taking better care of yourself for your own sake. You're going to have to do so for your peace of mind and in order to attract a woman. Lose the weight, go to a dermatologist for the acne, get a new wardrobe, cut your hair, buy a soap that is specifically designed to be tough on grease (I have one! It works like a charm!).

At the risk of disclore, I was a young teenager with not a lot of promise. I was very fat, I had acne, I had a greasy face and a huge poof of red hair. It was a sight to be seen.
One day I had enough. I was sick and tired of being fat. So guess what? I began to work out. And I began to eat very healthfully. And you know what happened? I got very slim, my acne went away (no more greasiness either) and I realized that I had curves too! My hair grew out that summer and it was beautiful. I was glowing. That was about 9 or 10 years ago. I'm 22 now and not only do most men consider me very beautiful with a great figure, but I've ran 4 marathons and I'm a black belt in Tae Kwon Do. I'm not telling you all this to brag or to shove it in your face. I'm telling you this because I'm trying to relay to you what hard work can accomplish. It's absolutely incredible and mind blowing.

I hope that that helped.

your class mates are really mean! as for bad skin, are you eating healthily? bad skin is something you can solve-eat omega 3s, zinc and vitamin c or try a health food store product called 'perfect skin'-it works super good and I've tried it. also drink more water and work out (I also do that) and if your fat, then exercise and be more pro active instead of just complaining about it and last of all be strong and dont' be harsh on yourself. I was not hot in highschool either so I know how it feels-but I'm a totally different story now ;) you got to work on your goals and work on your personality. I jog at least 3 times a day and I eat super healthy so...yeah.

yes, just the fact that you want to change it shows change for your acne buy skin cream like benzoid peroxide or oxy pads and wipe your face with them every day oxy is cheaper it's at any drug store second screw those people not literally but they don't know you to talk about you and if they do it's because they are miserable it has nothing to do with you people hurt people because they hurt they are messed up not you just ignore them as far as for the viginity issue it's not bad being a vigin sex isn't what it's sounds like it's not all exciting it creates a lot of problems so if you can wait it would be better distract yourself with things like reading and activties at school it will make dealing with those feelings easier wait until you get married so you can save yourself for some one special it makes it more special and don't run and get married wait until after you go to college to get married so you can be financially and emotionally and physically ready to handle sex because it comes with a lot of consequences like stds and some of them you cannot get rid of like aids and herpes you can also die from aids and stop putting your self down and start saying positive things about yourself every day you'll see a change and every one else will too then they'll respect you

you have your personality that is the most unique thing! everybody is different.. there is no such thing as ugly everything is cute in some wayss ;) if you think you can't get girls cause of your looks then your looking for a wrong type of girls.. looks are gonna fade as you grow older.. find someone that will love you for who you are inside not by how you look because who you are inside will never changee!

Hey,
I don't want to sound harsh but this will help. If you don't like the way you look then change it. If you are not happy with your weight, go exercise. If your not happy with your acne..Buy cream or if you have enough money go to a doctor and get it fixed. Go get a haircut and wash your hair sweety(please do that) it will take the greasiness away. Let me tell you this you need to feel good about yourself. This will make you feel a little bit better.,Changing the way you look will not completely help your situation. In this world there is always gonna be something wrong with you. That's how the world is. It happens to everybody. So I hope this helps.

All you have to do is be yourself the will always be that on star searching for you and you really sound like a nice guy. If you don't like how you look then try to change and I know it's hard but try! =] I believe you are capable of doing it.

1. Get a haircut
2. Change your diet
3. Always remind yourself that there is always someone out there looking for you
4. Stand up to those d*** sons of b*******
5. Prove those people wrong

I also agree with you on the fact that people judge on appearance. Its so stupid. What matters is your heart and you personality and your attitude towards things. Just remember that there is always a star searching for ya! =]

i really agree with the fact that people today just judge you on what you look like and it's bullsh*t. I spent my life being judged beacuse I was fat, and when I lost weight people started to treat me better and it made me mad as hell.

the thing is, you are a special guy, just because your ugly doesn't mean you won't find love, it might just make it harder. it sucks but you just have to have faith, faith that it will all wokr out. I guess that's all any of us can have really just fatith

nope... sorry
just go for an ugly girl

AWWWWWW! I'm sure you are an amazing guy and you'll find that girl. Wow beauty is in the yes of the beholder, I think I'm hot, but some might disagree. My point is under all the hurt and anger I see a smart, caring person, you'll find her. Hang in there sweetheart. Those bastards don't deserve you anyways, so keep it moving and you'll be suprised by what you'll find once you stop looking.

U don't need hope...u will find someone some day...just well when you put ur self out there don't seem despite..being despite will get you no where...just try talking to some people as in girls around u, not all girls are the same...myself and many other girls I no don't judge a person before they get to no them, and if I no girls like that ur bound to find some=]

A guy friend of mine was in a terrible fire when he was an infant...he nearly died but he survived, he is now 19 and he has serious burn marks on his face arms and some other parts of his body that will never go away...he has also gotten teased and laughed at throughout his life in and out of school..but he just ignored it and tryed to make other friends, there are a lot of rude girls out there but it is just the kind ones that matter...he never really lost hope though, now he owns a house and has a beautiful girl friend he met in his first year of collage...he met her just by trying to talk 2 her, and she came to fall in love with him...

so you see there is always someone out there for everyone...it is just that some people have to give it time for gods work 2 come in play=]

i hope this helps you =] just remember you don't need hope because she will come..u may just have to help find her=]

Hi there,
I know that this is going to be a long process for you but unless you learn to love yourself, nobdy can love you. That's the way it is. It is not attractive to see a person that can't even love themselves and insecurity is a really hard trait to deal with. It's not as easy as it sounds though. Like you said you can't just go "No more issues. Oh Joy!" You really need to focus on celebrating the things about yourself that you find attractive and really try and make the most of them. Looks aren't everything, honestly a person can seem very attractive with the help of a shining personality. I have fallen for a few guys that weren't traditionally attractive and that was all because of who they were on the inside.

Hey first of all, a girl won't like you if your that pessimistic and hate yourself. For someone to like you, you have to like yourself first. Trust me, I know this, I've been through it. Even though in my case it's quite the opposite. Also, this may only be your 'ugly-duclking fase' and you may soon change (I have seen it happens so so many times). Regarding acne, there's always medicine you can take (look up roactuan) or even just special creams and stuff. Weight may be an issue now, but you can always loose it. There, that's basically me giving you a solution, just trying to help out. I know its hard, trust me, but you just have to believe in yourself and know deep inside that you can do it. Before trying to get a girl, try to be happy with yourself, so that someone may eventually be happy with you.

Do you think beautiful people have it easy too? Trust me, I have had issues throughout my life. Do you know what its like to have guys after you, but not be sure if they are just into your looks, your boobs, your body, but if they really like you as a person. I'd rather take a long time to meet a guy who I know will seriously like me, then have many guys chasing after me but being unsure of what they really want. If they are just using me to show off, for sex or whatever.
I finally learnt to differenciate between good guys and assholes. But trust me, it took me a long time. I'm 19 and my boyfriend is 24, and we have been together for 2 years now and I couldn't be happier (but I only managed that when I learnt to work with myself and the people around me).

Plus, you don't know how hard it is to have many friends who are girl if you are good looking. Girls from their teenage years onwards are jealous of good looking or even more of gorgeous girls. I now have few close friends, but they tell me that sometimes it's hard being my friend, because I don't know what it feels like to go somewhere and always having the guys check out the person next to you. But I'm greatful I have them, and greatful I finally earned there trust, because as they said, its hard to trust someone with good looks, just because in their opinion our life is easier (but really its not that much easier at all).

Moreover, you have no ideas how many times I have been discriminated for my looks. You know what its like to actually want to do something important but people just don't give you the opportunity because you look like some dumb blond with implants? Its not my fault if I'm naturally blond or have boobs, I or anyone else including you, shouldn't be discriminated for our looks.

Just wanted for you to see what it is like at the other side of the spectrum.
Ok maybe some people will disagree with me, but I know what it is like cause I lived through it, so don't judge.

If you love yourself, it will only be easier for others to love you back. I mean why would someone love you, if you don't even love yourself?

Alright. First things first.

Improve your image; get a hair cut, try a new style (but still be you), etc.
Next, get your life in order, and what you are looking for. It was hard for me start this, but I started figuring out things in my life; what I believed in, what I liked in men, what I wanted to do in the future. Trust me, I love a guy who knows who he is. :)
You need something to boost your confidence around women. And if you think you are ugly, they are going to see that you are not confident on how you look, and its a turn off.
So once again, improve your image. :)
And as the anonymous user down there said, doctors can help with the ance spots. Than again, I pretty much agree with everything she said.

And on another note, if you are looking for a great group, and they won't reject you? A youth group is always nice. Its not to meet people, but to gain faith in what matters, Christ. I hear people talking about how they haven't had sex yet (at 17), and I just think its a little werid and disturbing. And you aren't alone when it comes to this, everyone is longing for love and to be loved. And I feel that if you start hanging out with a better group of people and growing in faith; life won't seen as bad (or people) and insults have no affect.
Matthaw, Mark, Luke and John. I don't care who you are, those are the pages of life.

no such thing as ugly, just doesn't put in effort in his appearance

just be yourself :) but also try to make an effort to be a better person than what you are right now. if you feel good about yourself, people will see it, how you shine from other good looking guys.

Ok here's what to do:

1. Go to your doctor. Get acne treatment for your spots.They can give you something that WILL clear it up.
2. Eat well. Don't eat greasy food which will make you more spotty. Drink lots of water to help your skin. Go to weight watchers mens classes to get support to lose the weight. Esp if you have a lot to lose.
3. Exercise to get a buff body to get a girl. You can hire a personal trainer if you have the money to get yourself a personalised fitness plan to get you a 6pack/toned.
4. Set yourself goals. Start small and then work up to medium and big goals. What do you want to do with your life? Aside from complaining! You have to work to get what you want, no-one will hand it to you. Brainstorm what you want and then make your goals "SMART". Google "SMART" for more info.
5. Socialise more. Join clubs in your area so you have a social network which will allow you to meet girls. Just stop caring so much about what other people think of you! Everyone will go to college anyway and you'll be able to start afresh there so chill out man. Join clubs and socs if you are in college already. If you're nerdy, then just find some other nerds to hang out with at first and then build up to cooler people.
6. Don't go to a hooker. That is honestly the saddest thing I've ever heard a 19 year old say.
7. You NEED to work on your confidence. Through therapy, reading self-help books, by getting out there and doing goals which will give you sense of achievement. Nobody "has to" accept you. You sound like a pushover. You need to be assertive or else the world will crush you. Learn how to say no if you don't want to do something.
8. Stop being such a sap about girls. You can do better than cuddle a girl! If you stay so innocent, then no 19 year old girl will want that. You'll have to make an effort to be more friendly and outgoing. And fun. You sound like you're focused inward whereas you need to focus outward. Maybe do some charity work so you appreciate what you have more. It works. And writing a gratitude list-list of all the good things you have in your life every day (5) so you'll be more grateful for what you have.
9. Use positive affirmations every morning. Tell yourself "I am great" every morning. It sounds corny but it works too. If you don't do it, nobody else will! It has to come from you.
10. Finally you're an adult now so you need to take responsibility. If you have a problem, you need to come up with a solution. Most of your problems are just teen angst/lack of confidence and can be fixed. There is no cure there will always be some problem but that's life. CBT Therapy (cognitive behaviour therapy) could really help your negative thinking. It replaces it with more realistic thinking patterns. You have to make the most of your lifeor else just stay stuck. You have choices. You are not powerless. You have control over everything you do so take that control and use it!

Ugly guys can get dates, too, and not just with ugly girls. I think I am an average looking person, but my boyfriend is pretty goofy looking. But that's the thing about women: for some of us, it really is the personality that is the key. A guy that is confident and attentive, but not overly so, is always a plus.

Having said that, no one wants a boyfriend that wallows in self pity, so whatever you do, don't dump all your insecurities on the first girl that comes along. It'll freak her out. But before you can worry about that, there has to be a girl present, huh?

You need to increase your confidence slowly. Do little things that help you reconnect with humanity. I know that sounds cheesy, but really, just holding the door for someone and getting a thank you, or smiling and getting a smile in return, these seemingly insignificant things are like mini-interactions that I know I always enjoy.

I know one of the things that always brings me out of my depressions is volunteering. Not because I'm out doing good deeds, necessarily, but because I've found that some of the kindest and most outgoing people are volunteers. Who know, you could even meet a friend. And, I'm always impressed when I find out someone volunteers, so this could be one of the little things about yourself you can be proud of.

I didn't read the hole thing, people consider me beautiful though I rather a guy with a bit of ugliness :-p
DON'T KNOW WHY ! it's charming when he has the right attitude and personality.
Of course he need to dress up correctly and everything it's just I don't need a cute face!

well.. the way to get all your worries away is to go to therapy explain all your problems to a doctor. every teen gets pimples, all you have to do is every morning clean your face every day to get the oil and dirt off your skin. or you can use proactive the most safest and eisiest way to help your skin against acne. also go up to people say hi make friends that way.

Hey I used to be considered ugly and I think I still am to some people. I'm sorry you feel that way and I know how you feel. It's no wonder if you have issues when people dog you out like that for how you look all you can.

If you're fat lose weight
If you have acne, do stuff to improve your skin
You have the power to change your appearance for the better and improve yourself.

You can't sit around feeling sorry for yourself when you have all the power in the world to change. Would you want to date a fat, acne infested, gross looking, greasy girl? When you imagine snuggling with a girl do you picture snuggling up with that? Probably not right? Well change. I changed out of my ugliness but while you can change the outside all you want you still have to deal with the inner you.

So, can't you change how you look? It's not shallow or wrong to look your best. If you are eating unhealthy foods, you are contributing to your weight gain and skin conditions. Yes, it's easy to remember all the hurts of the past and let that rule your life, but you can start fresh right here and now. Go for walks if you don't want to join a gym. Eat more fruits and veggies than junk food. Make small changes and over time, these small changes will add up to big ones. You ask if t here is hope for the ugly? Of course! My husband is a bigger guy with not so great skin, but he's also is super sweet, nice, and has interesting hobbies. Start by being more positive and then work on the physical things that are bothering you. Best of luck and don't give up.

You want to get the girl of your dreams? Well unless she is also a "fat, acne infested, gross looking, greasy, long haired" girl, you're going to have some problems.
Think about how much you want a romantic relationship. If you want it BADLY ENOUGH, make some MAJOR changes to your life in order to get it.
1 - start walking. Walk for hours every day until you lose the excess weight. No girl will be turned on by a fat dude.
2 - CHANGE YOUR DIET. Go to the health food store, search "acne diet" on google, do whatever it takes. Try the "raw food diet". It could totally change your mood, your energy, your weight, and your complexion.
3 - think positively. You CAN get what you want from life, it will just take a lot of time, effort, and maybe a lot of pain.

Is there any hope for ugly guys? Some. But only if they have the drive and ambition to chase their dreams and change themselves for the better.
And don't just do it for "her", do it for your self.

Whenever I get down about something I always make plans, and it seems to help. So, if I were you this would be my plan.

You described yourself as "a fat, acne infested, gross looking, greasy, long haired guy"

The easiest thing to fix there is to be not be greasy. Take a shower every day (if you don't already), and that should help. If you just accumulate oil throughout the day on your face and scalp, then you could wipe the oil off your face with a napkin or something, and buy a shampoo that is good for oily hair.

I'm not really sure why you add the long hair into the list of things you don't like about yourself...But if you don't like it then get a haircut. If you don't know what kind of haircut to get, then ask the hair cutting person's opinion of what would look good on you.

Acne is not so easy to fix. I'm not sure if you're considering the severe acne as your skin condition, or if you mean something else entirely. If you have severe acne that won't go away, you could look into accutane. One of my friends had horrible skin, and then he went on that stuff, and now has nicer skin than me. I've also heard of people using the supplement DIM to help with acne. Make sure to wash your face in the morning and night, and exfoliate a few times a week so that the dead skin can't clog your pores.

Alright, and now the weight. Exercising and eating healthy isn't that hard to do once you get used to it. The easiest diet I can think of is to just cut out all simple carbs like sugars and white breads. Replace them with complex carbs like whole grain breads. If you drink soda and sugary drinks it would be a good idea to cut those out too. And for the exercise...I like to run, walk, and ride my bike. My dad also has a lot of weights so I usually use those too. If you look up some exercises you could easily make a workout plan for yourself.

Anyways, planning like that usually makes me feel a lot better, so I hope it at least helps you feel slightly better. I'm really sorry that people are treating you so poorly, it's really not right. I hope you start feeling better about yourself soon :)

I have felt (and sometimes still do, because I am single) exactly like you my friend, and here are the facts: You might very well be alone for the short-term future. What I have learned, however, is that being ugly is, in fact, a blessing. During these years that no girl is paying attention to you, develop yourself. Get into something you like, and get good at it. Find a passion. Play an instrument. Get into philosophy. Do what I am doing and go to college with no intention on getting a degree - just to learn. Do whatever you feel like and become a well-rounded person. It hurts right now because you are sick of being alone, believe me, I know. I paid for sex in the army in order to lose my virginity. I have only been with about 6-7 women and have only had 1 girlfriend.So I know how you feel.

But look at it this way, most those hot girls I envied in high school who were out of my league, by the time I got out of the army in 2004 were single moms whose boyfriends had taken off, maybe because they were douches but possibly also because they had realized that these chicks had nothing to them. Take a look:

link

Sure, we envy good looking guys because they get attention, sex, friends, everything that we long for because we desperately need to validate ourselves because all we have heard about ourselves is negative. But these people who care only about outward things because they are young and beautiful will be the ones to end up trying to validate themselves later in life.

MissConfused93 seems like a perfect example of what I'm talking about. She's either going to be crying at 40 and end up spending thousands of dollars on plastic surgery or worse - end up dying wondering if her life meant nothing.

Do not let that happen to you.

In regards to confidence, I have had a real hard time with it myself, and I just figured out yesterday that the secret is to have confidence in your other skills. If you're good at art or playing the piano for example, then think about that when you walk and talk and exude confidence from that. Or if you've got a killer personality and can make a girl laugh, then think about how funny you are when you walk up to them. I like to sing, and when I do (even though I've come to realize that my voice sucks, I feel like another person, completely confident and in control. So what I'm trying is to think about how I feel when I sing and picture that in my head while I go throughout the day. Another thing I am trying in my philosophy class is to basically really get into the dicussions and speak my mind and I think I have definitely gotten some female attention, and from some DAMN good looking ones at that. It'll be all right dude.

Dude, I feel for you. I really do. I was once like you - I had nothing going for me but sheer force of will to survive and succeed.

Firstly, address the issue of your skin condition. Go private if you must. Trust me, this is the first step to improving your own mental image. Girls don't care that much about looks if everything else about you is awesome, but if you look nasty-ass then it's game over. Any improvement will help. Really, make an effort. It's worth it.

Secondly, improve yourself as a person and how you present yourself. Go to the gym and get buff. Get fit. This will take time, effort and you'll feel like a moron initially, but slog it out. Once you've gained some muscle, get some fashionable/sharp clothes that rest on you well. Get a shop assistant to help you.

Read up on human psychology. This is THE most important part to your improvement. Learn everything you can about alpha male mannerisms, thought patterns, speech patterns, posture etc. I've been aware of the PUA and MRA community for 2 years now, and I'm still learning. (message me for the best sites and books - I don't want every Tom, Dick and Harry knowing about this stuff, as it's dangerous sh*t in the wrong hands)

There's nothing much more I can say. It's going ot take you years to sort out your life from how you've described it, but it'll be worth every drop of blood, sweat and tears.

Regarding the negative attitude, when I was in high school, I was made fun of for my appearance. In reaction, I often told myself that I didn't care about my appearance; however, this created a vicious cycle between poor maintenance and negativity, and it would continue to spiral downwards. I would suggest getting a makeover; I had three salient moles removed, a new hairstyle and got rid of my glasses.

For the acne, creams and lotions don't work on their own. Healthy eating is a very important complement. Also, your face may simply be still producing a lot of oil because of your age.

For the hair, try experimenting with different styles to see what suits your face and body type.

Good luck!

I'm sure it's not easy, but calling people "shallow" for not wanting to be with you is not going to help. Just because someone prefers not to have a physically unattractive person doesn't make them shallow. If that made them shallow, then that would mean that every person in the world is shallow. The reason you're calling them shallow is just because of the hurt you feel. But that's doesn't mean they are shallow.

Think of it the other way around for a second. If you didn't didn't want someone becuase of the way they look, would that make you shallow?

I'm sure it's not easy, but there are millions of people in your position. All you can do is try to have a better attitude about it and stop pouting, and make an attempt to take care of yourself instead of letting yourself go. There's nothing stopping you from eating healthy and excercising, and perhaps consulting a dermatologist, because that's what they are there for.

There are numerous examples of unattractive guys who made a success of themselves despite their situation, and now they can get all the hot girls they want. Look at Bill Mahr, Kid Rock, Toby Maguire, and other unattractive guys. They didn't let their physical inadequacies hold them back; they found a way to fill their bank account with millions of dollars, and now they can have all the beautiful women they want. ... They didn't pout about their situation, they decided to succeed despite their difficulty.

Also, take Tiger Woods for example. He's not ugly, but you can tell that he was the geek in high school that pretty girls wouldn't have given the time of day to. But he didn't let that stop him. Despite being the nerd, he developed his golf game, which eventually allowed him to make millions of dollars, and now he is enjoying that smoking hot model trophy wife.

Not to sound mean, but, how do you think those nasty, disgusting, fat NASCAR drivers get the beautiful women that they get? With their personalities? No.

Have you ever seen those, 4'8", 70 lbs. horse jockeys that ride in the Kentucky Derby? How do you think they get the beautiful women that they get? With their personalities? No.

All you can do is make an attempt to eat right and excercise, try to find something that can make you a good income, and show the world a better attitute. A postive attitude makes people like you much more than a negative attitude does. ... And there are treaments for skin problems, no matter how bad it is. Although, it can be expensive, which is another reason to make good money.

Regarding the latest update about gym - Try to get a trainer. This will make things easer and he will also help (he should at least) reinforcing You to continue to exercise.

You need to do a several exercises, each for a different muscle group. Then relax a minute or two. Then do the next.

You need short but heavy exercises. It will cause a small damages in Your muscles and that's what You need. They will hurt in the beginning, but then, after You have a good meal and long sleep, they will heal up and this is how muscles are growing - by breaking a little up and healing.

This will take approx a half of the year of regular exercises (once or twice a week) to start notice changes.

Have fun and If You need any more help, feel free to send me a note ;)

Yes excercise more and it really does make you feel good. And if you do it regulary you will see results and it will boost your confidence and it will make your bod look good for the ladies. Cut your hair cause long greasy hair can cause acne on your face and back. As for the acne go to the dermatologist for it and see what they say. I don't think anyone can be undateable unless you have a serious mental issue such as retardation. Being 19 and having not experienced those things is really not that bad.There's a lot of people that don't go doing that stuff till there 40 or 50. I think you'll be just fine. Some people out there have it a lot worse than you do.

Well my friend... theory of darwinism states survival of the fittest and that creatures choose mates based on what will succeed in the next generation... you however... albeit as you put it not the most attractive person physically are obviously quite smart and although brains isn't a persons first choice... because nature of the beast is brawn... still have quite the opportunity to overcome... I know I don't look it now... but I was in a similar situation with the acne thing... and yes working out is a great stress reliever and self esteem booster... so hang in there push through... and even at it's toughest do your best... and don't do it for someone else do it for you... then you'll be happy... and when you're happy you're confident and when you're confident you're attractive... who cares what other people think of you... I know it's hard right now... but as I stated before you just have to push through... good luck... hit me up if you need anything

Hmmm...

There's another alternative. Stay on the internets and be as depressed as you are.

Just follow the best advice, and you'll be fine. Sorry I couldn't help you, because I'm in the same situation as you.

If you have a skin condition, do something about it. Visit a dermatologist and find that magic ointment to reduce its affects. And start playing a sport or hit the gym. When you have muscles, you are not as ugly as you used to be.

Simply brushing your teeth and having perfect oral hygiene can also have a big affect on your attractiveness.

I am in a similar situation, not near as bad anymore, but it was.And your update is spot on, you can't just magically get confidence. So as I see it you have two options, look for a girl with an "unattractiveness" equal to yours. Or Improve yourself, seeing as all of your listed problems are physical. And the kicker is that your bad, depressed mood can be a great motivator. Picture your dream girl and tell yourself you don't deserve that YET when exercising. Also, try washing your face before you shower, you might gross yourself out by the greasy feeling of only a little bit of water mixing with all the oils on the skin of your face. Don't cut corners on your appearance.
And lastly, don't confuse confidence with assertiveness, there's nothing wrong with being a submissive guy, if you are not a doormat.

i know how you feel. you want to just walk to agilr and be ll confident but you can't you should try with girls that already know you.

I am answering this question because I am procrastinating.

There are a lot of answers to this question, some good and some bad. It surprises me the amount of women who could be so rude to someone in your situation.

What a lot of people are missing in this situation is that if you lost all that excess weight and got perfect skin, you would still be considered unattractive. Attraction and looks are separate entities. Women are attracted to confidence, which affects how you hold and present yourself physically, rather than your actual looks. The "sexy ugly" thing that another answerer referred to has an element of truth to it. The girls may be a little overweight, but they have internal confidence and guys find that very attractive.

So the key is confidence, not weight. Obviously this is not an easy thing to obtain, especially in your situation where you have had so many horrible people around you.

I can only give the following advice in relation to confidence.

Ensure that you have an element of progression in your life.

This means that you should identify things that you REALLY want to do. I am not suggesting that you should loose weight, but if you did, you pick up the phone right now and book a personal trainer. If loosing weight isn't your thing, how about learning a musical instrument? Art? Learning a language? Dancing?

It doesn't matter what it is, but identify something and take actual active steps to achieve it. Many people set personal goals and they forever remain in theory. Many people do not chase their goals and they are left in a perpetual state of doing nothing, they have no progression.

But as you progress, you become satisfied. You say I now have this skill that I didn't have before, and I like it. This will increase your confidence.


So in short, the weight isn't the reason you're not getting women. It's the confidence. Get some through setting goals and taking steps to achieve them.

hey man my friends mom always told me that there's someone out there for everybody just depends on when you meet them lol but listen if you don't want to be "ugly" anymore and want to gain confidence do something about it...i used to be a little overweight and I had acne problems to man and its not the end of the world...i joined a gym lost 20 lbs packed on some lean muscle and I got treatment for my acne like proactive and now girls are coming up to me and talking to me first in some cases and my self esteem is through the roof...bottom line is if you want to be something you got to do something about it I did and I'm loving life now I still have some problem asking some girls out that I think that are out my "league" because I still look at myself like the old me but in reality I am not...if you really want to change start now man good luck ur only 19 I started at 20 and I'm 21 in one year I changed a lot so get to it maN! good luck

GO FOR A MAKEOVER DUDE. Have you watch the show? The swan, beauty and the geek. Amazing how a hair cut and wardrobe makeover changes things

Wallowing is self pity will do nothing for your cause, what you need to do is get over it and be a man about it. If your fat join a gym, eat healthy, ache problem dermatologist or products, there's a whole damn section on acne solutions at the store. Don't like your long greasy hair, cut it. You can solve all of these problems on your own your problem is you don't want to and if you never want to then why even bother asking this question?

Girls are shallow//

I had the same problem with self esteem and loving myself. You have to love yourself before someone else can love you. You have a nice personality so I bet that if you change your diet a little and take a little better care of yourself your start to get mad girls

Really - you know the answer. Just make a lot of money -- and you can get the woman of your dreams. Yes, sadly, it is that simple.

first of all, I think it's great that you posted this and hopefully you'll find someone you can talk with in person. but this is a great start. I'm just saying this because you mention bottling up your feelings and not having friends. I have family members who have gone through some pretty devastating mental health breakdowns as a result of completely internalizing all their problems and worries, so it's really really really great that you can articulate your feelings in this way.

a lot of people on here have made suggestions on improving your physical appearance, and that's all well and good. but I think the first step for you will be to find a community, find what you're passionate about and what's valuable to you and the people that share your values. yer actually quite lucky in a very special way, even though I know this all seems super painful. but you've had to deal with a lot, you've been treated badly, your struggling . . . and because of all these things you have particular insights and a certain depth that is uniquely you. I can tell by your writing that you are also thoughtful, intelligent and creative. you need to find an outlet for all these things and this will lead you to find the type of people that won't call you ugly and treat you poorly.

look: middle school . . . high school . . . they are AWEFUL times for almost everyone, but particularly those who are "different". I know from personal experience that people are cruel to people that that, but that just comes from a place of insecurity and a certain social structure that is silly and based on very shallow ideals. if you are able to reach out to other people in the "real world" with similar interests, or away to a more progressive college and find a writing group or something that connects to something you a passionate about you'll find people who can challenge you in a GOOD way, open you up to new ideas, nurture your unique skills and enjoy and appreciate the incredible things you have to offer. THEN, sure . . . get excited about doing little things to improve your health (most importantly) and appearance. exercise honestly DOES help with depression, and help you feel better, so that would be a great step to take. but first, just think about the things you love, the things you are passionate about, and the things that you want to do in your life and then find the people connected to that community.

hey every girl I have ever dated has said that personality is way more important than looks. So you having a negative attitude hurts you just as much as your looks, if not more. You have to be more possitive about your approach or you WILL end up never being with a girl so cheer up buddy. Always remember, there's someone out their that will see you and think you are perfect so don't give up yet on yourself

hey every girl I have ever dated has said that personality is way more important than looks. So you having a negative attitude hurts you just as much as your looks, if not more. You have to be more possitive about your approach or you WILL end up never being with a girl so cheer up buddy. Always remember, there's someone out their that will see you and think you are perfect so don't give up yet on yourself

No you cannot.

But I can tell you that one of the best men I ever knew was a guy that set his place and stuck to it. He was not a handsome guy. He was gangly and looked somewhat akward...he too had bad skin... not his fault either. These are the obstacles that were placed into his life. Other men had different obstacles.

So, with everything my judgemental mind could pick out that this poor fellow had to deal with the more I got to know him the more I realized I could ALWAYS depend on him. I mean if he said he would, he damned sure did! It was his way. And he took great comfort in that. I know for a fact that he actually felt blessed that he could find the intestinal fortitude (Guts) to never waiver from his commitments.

I lost track of him over the years so I cannot tell you his life turned out great or bad. The only think I know it did was turn out to be HIS life. Like mine turned out to be mine.

I know this much though. He was one of the best MEN I ever knew.

Dude it takes time to gain confidence. First of all what are your interests. Do you play guitar? do you like video games, are you involved in clubs and organizations, do you have friends?, if you find people who have similar interests, and go from there. Also, ask your friends to set you up with someone, and give it a try. Basically though the important part is finding people who are interested in the same stuff as you, like if your are in a service club, you find someone in their and strike up a conversation. Also speak up, be bold, trust me I still struggle with this crap too, but I find ways to express myself . I play guitar at churhc, I'm involved with some organizations, also go out and meet girls at places, trust me, you'll get the guts to talk to one.

Wow that was really well written! Probebly one of the best self-pity rants I've ever read. You sounds exactly like me. I'm also 19 and have never experianced being with a woman. I loved "I yearn to feel the warmth of a girl's figure against mine". That's exactly what I'm looking for.

Hey maybe we should hook up. We can get naked, hug each other under the duvets, and possibly watch 2001: Space Oddysey? :P

You need to improve your image. Just because you are ugly doesn't mean you shouldnt take care of yourself. Get your sh*t together, learn some fasion, haircuts that fit your face, some acne medication, make yourself appear like you are self confident and don't treat yoruself like sh*t. People make those connections.

You don't grow up with confidence, unless you have some egotistic genetic rage in your head, but that is besides the point. Once you build your self up, you will have self respect, then confidence comes. Doing minuscule things like making small talk to girls, do it to girls that don't appear intimidating, then work your way up from small talk, to actually chilling with them for a while, then perhaps getting their number. I would suggest you get some friends that are knowledgable in doing this.

You could go up to any guy that appears successful and pick his brain if you give him something, ex: coffee shop, buy the dude coffee, respect him, ask him questions. Usually it is answers like, I just remain calm and relaxed, and all I am there for is to make a friend and schedule something with them after I am done talking to them, which results in a # or w.e.

Little stuff like that helps, I cannot stress your personal appearance is a reflection of your self respect. Get in shape and get your sh*t together.

Ask your friends how could you improve your physical apparance, you should have at least one good friend, and if it's a girl much better. And also when they tell you all those names, just laugh and take it easy. Make jokes about you being ugly. That would improve your self esteem. Never let anybody hurt your feelings though. ( One little tip about acne: I know PROACTIV doesn't work but try using the Refining Mask only, it's like $20, but I swear it took all my acne away, I use it every night before I got to bed it worked. and you don't have to buy the whole kit).

there's no hope for us guys to get a g.f welcome to the my world :)

Read "How Successful People Win" by Ben Stein

There are tons of women out there who love a face only a mother could love. You'll just have to keep searching.

dude, you sound like me about a year ago...you wanna know the secret to being happy? honestly it might p*ss you off until you realize that it is the truth!

shower once or twice a day (I got some greasy hair...i wash my hair with regular shampoo, conditioner, and then baby shampoo and it works)

use toothpaste on your pimples and acne

force yourself to be assertive, it becomes more normal the more you do it

force yourself to talk to girls that you like about being more than friends, and you really do gotta be confident and comfortable

you ain't gotta get rid of your issues but you gotta deal with them, it will make you feel better and it will make people realize that you are trying, but don't tell them about it because it shows them that you are trying to put on a show and it don't work

FAKE IT UNTIL YOU MAKE IT!

NOTHING COMES RIGHT AWAY, BUT AFTER FAKING IT FOR AWHILE IT COMES TRUE AND BECOMES NATURAL! AND STOP PUTING YOURSELF DOWN! LOOK IN THE MIRROR EVERYDAY AND TELL YOURSELF THAT YOU ARE HANDSOME AND LIST AT LEAST 2 POSITIVE QUALITIES ABOUT YOURSELF...AND I DO MEAN EVERYDAY! I AM WORKING WITH 2 OTHER GUYS THAT ARE IN THE SAME POSITION AS YOU, AND MYSELF, SO I KNOW WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT! PLEASE LISTEN AND ADD ME IF YOU WANT

dude I'm guessing all the sh*t you ever took from people was in high school. people aren't that bad once you get out of that hell hole. it's like some strange microchasm where people can get away with that sh*t. I'm sure you'll meet nicer people in the REAL world.

Duder, the other guys here have really said it all already, but I'm just going to add my 2 cents anyway.

You sound so much like me before college that it's not even funny (well, except for the fact that I was always insanely skinny). I'm not going to pretend that I'm perfect now - hell, I still have a lot of problems with girls - but I'm a lot better off than I was when I was in your shoes:

I've had 5 serious girlfriends, lived together with 2 of them (not at the same time ;)), I've had a respectable amount of shorter-term female company and have a lot of friends. How did I do it? Here's a very simple 2-step guide:

1. Accept the things you can't change.
2. Change the things you can.

Easier said than done, I know. But here's how you do it. First of all, accept that life's not fair. The hot guys will have an easier time picking up girls for most, if not all, of your life. Accept that you won't become Casanova overnight and that no matter how unfair it is, that's not going to change.

Now, once you've done that, picture how you'd like yourself to be - how YOU'd find yourself more attractive - and then strive to achieve that. You'd be amazed at how much difference good hygiene, a good wardrobe and some exercise will do. Oh, and do get on the exercise - if I could go back in time and give my pre-college self one piece of advice (and not a Sports Almanac) that would probably be it. Here's a few steps I'd advise you to take, in that order:

*Invest time and money (that you'll save by not going to hookers) in getting quality care for your skin - it seems to really be bothering you. It might not make your skin as smooth as a baby's bottom, but every bit helps.

*On a free day, after you step out of the shower, go to a perfume-store and pick yourself up some great aftershave. Smelling good goes a long way.

*Experiment with your hair. You don't NEED to cut it short (though I personally did), but make sure it fits both your face and your style. These days, whenever I feel unattractive, I have a haircut - it never ceases to make me feel better.

*Prepare to splurge on clothes. Go shopping with someone else, preferably a girl of your age, or else get the person in the store to help you. They'll get you to try out stuff you'd never dream of getting to yourself and you'll be amazed at the compliments you'll get.

*Get yourself a gym-membership and a training-schedule. Stick to it. Make sure you work both on losing weight and building muscle.

*Kick anyone who is bringing you down out of your life and remember that high school is hell and that in college and in "the real world" you'll find far more kindred spirits.

*Find a creative outlet for your helpless romantic ways. Not only will it make you feel a lot better, it'll make you a lot more attractive too.

Dude, I have so much left to say and almost no characters left. Poke me if you like, but believe me - things will be okay, they'll just need some work. If you're up for it, I'm not worried :).

Learn to play guitar. If you have the right personality type, it will work well for you. The Hooker thing is a waste of money, so don't do that unless your LOOOOAAADED.

I got a job as a dishwasher, and that's really toned my arms out, so if you need a job, do that it will be a more economically-friendly way to lose weight/ get the muscles.

I think it's pretty simple. You gotta believe in your self. First question I got for you is are you working or going to school. Girls love ambition. Secondly, I think that if you get out more. Take the time to do more healthy activities and sincerely come up with a do-able diet. You could be on your way to bringing sexy back in no time. I think it's most important to try to forget about girls first before you can start thinking about getting one. It's really depressing to remind yourself on a daily basis that your single and lonely. Depression could be the cause for the weight and acne (Hence the lack of female attention). Try finding something to get your mind off of girls. If you can trick yourself into thinking that improving yourself is fun you'll be unstoppable. This ain't gonna be easy. You gotta kick old habits you may have been doing your whole life but once you do you won't regret it. I hope this helps buddy. Were here for you!

Go to the gym.

Find a good company to play sports.

Be picky about who You accept as Your friends.

Reject anyone who dares to speak anything wrong about You.

Go to the clinic and ask what You should do about Your skin.

That's Your homework to do.

I know it feels like wrong and unfair that someone can have everything without doing anything while You have to do a lot of heavy work, but You have no choice.

Also You might try to find a people who are in heavy metal or punks. They actually don't care much about looks and usually are very friendly and social.

There are a lot of hot girls in HM also and usually that they actually LIKE a long haired men :D

And besides that - heavy metal sounds good :)

dude f*** all of that
you ain't ugly
get some self esteem
if you think ur sh*t girls will think ur sh*t
girls like self esteem and confidence and you obviously lack it
anyone can get anyone
u just got to know how to
sure there some people that are ugly f*** that
ok ur classmates are just poking fun at you don't let them get to you
u like someone ask them out
an "ugly" dude can get with a hot ass girl
and well you can do stuff to make yourself look presentable greasy hair? really dude take a shower ur fat work out go ride a bike and well that should get rid of the gross looking cut your hair short girls like it short
key is confidence and if you think ur all of this do something about it
key is confidence and self esteem I know its hard but work at it
so
cut ur hair
SHOWER
smell good
get some good clothes
work out
and when that's done
go pick any girl
ask her out
i know its going to be hard and ur going to sh*t ur pants
but do it
is a win win
why
1-even if she turns you down you get the experience and confidence of asking a girl out
meaning next girl will be easier
2-if she says yes its a date
i mean what's the wrost that can happen she saying no?
if she insults you WHICH I HIGHLY DOUBT you call her a bitch and walk off
but always be yourself dude
btw relationships are not that awesome
girls are full of drama and they are f***ing annoying just hook up lol but that's just me
either way good luck bro if anything I be here

"I WANT to have confidence" seems to be the root cause of why you're not happy or satisfied. To sum up, you've analyzed the situation, and feel that based on the feedback you've received from your peers, that you have little or zero sexual value to offer a heterosexual female.

This lack of positive validation, couples with a surplus of negative validation of your appearance and sexual desirability has caused your "confidence" to wither down to nothing. You've convinced yourself that; since others have rated your sexual value as low or none, that you have little or no value to offer others, and therefore, lack the confidence needed to be assertive with getting what you want and not tolerating what you don't want. You feel that since your value is low relative to others, that they are the chooses, and you are the beggar. This causes you to assume a submissive role where you are satisfied to get whatever you can get, and will tolerate any negative traits of the person who gives you some of what you want, because you believe that otherwise, you wouldn't have an other chance of getting it.

I'll throw some food for thought your way:

Does Donald Trump have any shortage of female attention, affection, or sexual options with the most sexually desirable women alive? Now, is Donald Trump the most sexually attractive man alive? Better yet, does he really have much sexual value to give to a woman? Is he someone she would think about when playing with herself? Not really.

Hmm. This seems to appear like a paradox. How can this be? Wouldn't this invalidate your entire belief system on the value of a person? Yes actually, it would.

The paradox of how a butt ugly man can have his pick of supermodels can be resolved when we consider ALL aspects of what value a person has to offer:

- sexual (yes, this is one of them; not all of them, nor the only one. this captures the ability to give sexual pleasure, and aesthetic appeal required to increase the sexual desire of the other)
- emotional (being charming can do more for you than being hot can, as a man. ever wonder why women waste so much time and energy into trying to stroke a guy's ego? sure, it does little or nothing for you, but it does for them; and they think that it will for you too! if you can make someone feel great about themselves, that's value you have to offer them, and not many can master a firm control over the gift of gab)
- financial (self-explanitory)

So now, I would reconsider the value YOU have to offer to others, and the value OTHERS have to offer to you. It will have a direct and more realistic effect on your confidence and assertiveness.

Notice how even if you're ugly, but can make s/o feel amazing (charming) and are financially secure, you actually have more value to offer to s/o who is only good-looking. Which makes their confidence seem artificial at best, insulting at worst.

OK, First Off. lose the negative aptitude. You will never get a girl that way. I have one suggestion tell the girls "I have a HUGE penis" OK just kidding, don't do that. but... do you know what goes a long way? Laughter. if you can make a girl laugh. you have it in the bag. I don't care what you look like. girls like the funny guy. As long as your not gross. get cleaned up and be funny!

Give yourself some credit, because looks aren't everything, despite what disgusting remarks your classmates directed at you. Some people could REALLY care less about how someone looks, and will take a closer look at hand at who a person is. Nobody is 'helpless' unless they chose to be. Nobody has a right to put anyone down because they're different. It's a crying shame and inexcusable. Our differences from one another is what makes us unique. There is always hope, so don't give up so easily. I know it's easier said than done, but don't give up : )