Why is my ex ignoring me when we agreed to stay friends?

My ex boyfriend and I broke up early last month. He said he was more than willing to go back to being friends like we were before we dated, and that I could text him anytime and he'd respond whenever he could. So for a couple of weeks after the breakup, I gave him some space (no begging and pleading at all), and then I decided to try a simple text asking him how he was doing. No reply. Oh, well.

I then waited another three weeks or so, and I actually saw him on campus earlier this week. I smiled and waved at him, and he waved back. So yesterday evening, I was talking with my best guy friend, and he said I should try to reach out to him again. So I sent my ex another simple text last night telling him what I was up to and asking how his summer was going. Still no reply. I don't get it. Why did he say we could be friends if he won't even respond to my texts? Keep in mind I haven't spammed him at all. I've only tried texting him twice with 2-3 week intervals in between. Before he and I dated, he still casually talked to/was friends with his last girlfriend, so he should have no problem talking to me as well, right? On the other hand, he did say that I was a way better girlfriend than she was, but I don't know. It's been a little over a month since we broke up. Shouldn't that be more than enough time?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • From what I learned, it will take time before exes can truly become friends. As messed up as this sounds, there is a possibility that he is ignoring you because he still needs to recover from the break-up and he might need more space before he can start a friendship. Sometimes it takes longer than a month if his feelings were strong for you.

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    • Even if breaking up was his idea? He was overwhelmed with school and everything going on in his life, and he didn't think he could be a good boyfriend to me.

    • My ex broke up with me for that same exact reason. He was moving to a different city and felt that he wouldn't be able to properly maintain his part of the potential long distance relationship. Later before he moved, he expressed how much he loves me and that we could possibly get back together once he's finished with school.

    • Guess we're both in the same boat! It sucks, but it had to happen :/ Good luck with you, and thanks for commenting!

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 4

  • Because stupid "let's be friends" is always a lie. If you think you can remain friends after a breakup then you're way out of touch with reality. It will never happen. Get over it and move on

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    • If you're going to be rude, don't even bother answering. Jesus!

    • You asked and you got the right between the eyes truth. If you can't handle the truth then don't ask

  • Well It depends on who broke up with who. If u dumped him,, he is probably still hurt or maybe trying to move on. Friendship only works if the two parties are no longer in love,, it has to be a mutual feeling. if he wants u back, he can't be friends with u no matter what agreement u had

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    • He broke up with me because he felt overwhelmed with everything going on in his life, and he didn't think it was fair to me.

  • Most guys cannot be friends with ex's. Fact of life.

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  • probably because he said that to keep you happy, but just wants you out of his life so he can move on. Guys aren't sentimental about exes.. we just move on.

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What Girls Said 3

  • no depending on how good yalls relationship was it could be very painful so he may need a little bit longer

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    • We had a pretty good relationship. We never fought or insulted each other at all. Nothing but respect from both sides.

    • that's why bc yalls relationship was healthy it was painful to let go

  • Hi :) My ex Boyfriend dumped me 7 months ago and similar to your experience, he agreed to stay friends. However, after the break up, he ignores me when he sees me, even avoids eye contact and never replied to my texts. After 7 months, he still ignores me but I'm completely over him now. Maybe some guys find it hard to stay friends after a break up? Also, some people can be easier to communicate with as friends than as a Girlfriend so maybe that's the case for his last Girlfriend. I hope this helps ^^

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  • He broke up with you? If that is so, he was just maybe saying those things about responding texts you couldnt feel sad. Maybe he was expecting of you to beg and when you didn't contacted him for 2 weeks he felt that you didn't care for him at all and now he is acting he doesn't care about you either.

    It is just my thoughts, it can be other stuff

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    • Begging is unattractive, and I knew not to do that. Why would he be upset that I didn't beg?

    • Some guys like to feel they are necessary for other peolple. Dont know why, maybe to feed his ego.

    • Yeah to feed his ego. Bottom line is, u can't be his friend cos u still have feelings for him, continue no contact until he genuinely wants u back. Dont give in to his little 'breadcrumbs'

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