Get her back by ignoring her?

Okay, I recently kind of messed up with a girl I really liked because I came on too strong and kind of cared too much at first, I kind of smothered her a bit so she pulled out the world famous "let's be friends" card, lol. After she told me that I'm not gunna lie I was hurt, so with my paranoia and pessimistic attitude I felt like all hope was lost with her, we still talk but there's a weirdness between us I can feel, like an awkward wall, lol. My friend told me that just because she turned me down once doesn't mean anything, he said that's all part of the game, all a part of the chase. So my friend told me that if I want her back I should ignore her, not to completely block her out but to not care as much, to dodge her a little and make her chase me. So this leads me to my question because I've heard people say ignoring the girl works, they swear by it, but why does it work? Does it create some sense of mystery or something? How do I get her back? Does ignoring her a little and not caring as much really work?

 

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Most Helpful Opinion

  • It works. No doubt.

    My way of getting more interested when first obviously liked and then suddenly not interesting at all, is that it leaves questions (I'm the philosopher, can't get enough to wonder about). Nobody can just change their feelings about someone! In my opinion it is a process and takes longer time than a day or a week when it means something.

    All my girlfriends who plays "the game" knows about this rule and still falls for it. My best friend is the queen of the game and mostly gets the guys she want, but when they use this "ignoring-rule" she misses them more than you can imagine even if she did not have any interest in them at all, that'll say they were an experiment. She lost her slaves that adores her. But that is just her way of getting a compliment: a boy adores her. Preferably at least two years older.

    As to short things up; try it! If it doesn't work than I'm sorry to say she isn't the one for you.

    Hate me... but think logically.

What Girls Said 3

  • How do you know if she REALLY is ignoring you and playing games?

    What if she's just busy?

  • do not ignore her! that will make her think you are not interested any more instead just be really nice to her like since she just wants to be friends then be friendly and give subtle hint that you still like her.

    • center of your universe

    • i agree, wrong! you don't have to ignore her but you can def. flirt with another girl in front of her, you can act like you don't see her in the hallway when you waalk past each other, ect.

      the no contact rule works because it get the gears turning ina girls head, "why is he not ready to kiss my feet?" "why is he flirting with her? I was better then her" "he should be with me, he liked me first" you have to secretly show her you don't worship her like she thought you did, show her she's not the

    • no. wrong

    • Show Older
  • Well when I use the 'lets just be friends' card it usually means that I am not attracted to the guy at all and I want to let him down easily... Or I say that because I don't want to ruin the friendship.

    If you ignore her she might think that you stopped liking her and then she would come back... You should try and see some hints if she's into you.

    • okay since you no she is interested this plan just might work, but don't be a jerk to her or anything, tell her you have been busy for a while, and she will get some interest back again!

      dont ignore her for more than a week though.. that would take it too far, and when you do see each other again just try not to seem to clingy like you said before, good luck !

    • Oh I already kno she likes me, but I wanted to bring things to the next level a little too fast so I guess it weirded her out and made me look clingy and obsessive...so I kno she likes me.

What Guys Said 1

  • dude, NC won't really work in your case cause you haven't dated her for a while. you have to remain friends. show that it doesn't effect you. No emotions. SO no awkward stuff. Just be chilled, be cool. Get another chick. Don't be clingy or needy. Involve her in your plans once in a while. DO group things or whatever. Ideally try to get another chick as well. If you want her to chase you, what's she gonna chase. You got to be a cool guy whos in demand and life of the party. Not some guy who is ignoring her.

    • then use low contact rather than no contact. be cool yeah, and you should be able to get her back easily.

    • This. I was getting close to some girl my mate also liked, he ended up asking her out, I moved on, but I never really stopped sort of flirting with her. Gotten to the point she is getting uncomfortably close with me despite still being with him actually lol.

      OP, just be cool.

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