What do guys think of 19 year old virgin girls? Will I ever have a boyfriend?

I'm 19 and I'm a virgin. I'm the only girl in my group of friends who is still a virgin (my best friend just lost her virginty 2 years ago at age 18 untill then she was my only friend who was a virgin) Im friends with a few boys, only ones around my age and a virgin (but honestly getting to know him I'm not surprised he is) I haven't even dated anyone either nor have I kissec a guy or held hands with a guy or anything for that matter. I know it's cause I'm ugly and im 5'5 and 200 pounds and I have small and ugly boobs ( 36C, it looks small on me and one my boobs is kinda saggy cause of genetics). I'm just too ugly to date. I even joined dating sites and actively message people but they don't seem interested as they don't message back or they do and they stop talking after a short time. Now, Im not gonna wait untill marrige ( with my sex drive it's just not realistic) but I want to know I've met the right guy to enjoy my first time with. I've heard a lot of guys say they don't like virgins cause they're too emotional or too clingy afterwards or they don't want to teach the person how sex goes and that if the girls a virgin after a certain time it just mean there's a bad reason behind it. To be honest I'm ashamed to be a virgin, but if guys were interested in me I'd've had sex a lost sooner. About the weight thing. My dad bought an exercise machine for us on Christmas and I've been working out for 15 minutes a day, and I'm not eating a lot. In fact, I've been eating less. But I've tried diets and exercise before and didn't lose any weight. So, what do you guys think? Is there hope for me or am I just meant to be forever alone? I'm never complimented by guys either and on the dating site I go on the only people who seem interested in me are creepy old men around my dads age (45). I also hate when guys say women have it easier when it comes to dating and sex. They say we just ask for sex and we get it, yeah right, only if you look like Megan Fox.

Updates:
I've had crushes on many guys. And every time I reveal my feelings to them I get rejected and then made fun of. I'm never going to ask a guy out again. I'm not even going to tell any guy I have feelings for them anymore or I'll get bullied again.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Being comfortable in your own skin is probably the most important lesson here. Confidence goes a long way with people. Your weight could be a medical or genetic (possibly thyroid) issue it could also be a nutrition (eating correctly rather than just less) and/or exercise issue. You would need to talk with a doctor who would likely need to do testing to determine these things.

    As far as virginity goes I'm not sure how or when there came to be a negative stigma with girls. Guys I understand I guess. But girls is just a little odd... since basically the beginning of humankind virginity has been prized among males. First for for its symbolic value. Second for its practical value with respect to what would hopefully be a lower likelihood of STD's and discipline, the desire for sex is a difficult urge to resist especially when caused by guys who can be quite persuasive. It could also possibly be caused by girls who are jealous they are no longer virgins and want other girls to join the club.

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    • I've tried confidence and it didn't work.

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    • Well, we are animals. Just more intelligent ones.

    • Agreed. Our ability to think and choose the way we do is why we are different. We are not just instinctual. You can change your life is you choose to. If you stick to it.

What Guys Said 22

  • You only have one V card, better make sure to use it wisely. While your at it, hit the gym. If you are really interested in being healthier, nothing does it like working hard for an hour in the gym. Honestly I am not interesting in taking anyone's V card fit or not fit. But if I had to, it would be the fit one. I don't care what size your boobs are, I care more about how well you take care of yourself. You can't control your breast size, but you can control how much you eat, what you eat, and how many calories you burn. That is what matters, not giving away your V card to some guy who doesn't deserve it.

    Tell yourself that your health matters, that you matter, and no low life guy deserves or needs to take your V card away from you. Start by going once a week. Up it till you are going three times a week. Consume health foods, no more potato chips for breakfast and candy at lunch. Eat a balanced diet. Balanced doesn't mean it has to taste bad, either. The first step is to tell yourself you can do it. Second step is to actually get off of the sofa and go the the gym and sign up for a membership, perhaps a nutritionist and trainer as well. Then start meeting with them at the gym once or twice a week, up it once you get used to it. Your ideal weight is right around 120 to 140, somewhere in there (I am speculating over the internet). It will take a year of hard work to do it, but this is the best thing you could ever do for yourself. Please don't take this advice lightly. This is something you can do, you just need to do it. Like now. No excuses. Excuses mean you don't care. Go get em', Tiger!

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    • Like I've said before I've tried low carb diets and exercise for 2 months and didn't lose any weight. I've been fat since I was 4 it's probably a medical dondition.

    • Could be. Talk to your doctor about it. What sort of exercise? When I come home from the gym, I expect myself to be dead and sore. Rather than eliminate carbs, aim for tons of fruits and veggies. Calories count more than carbs. Eat about 1500 calories a day. Avoid processed foods and eat very little sugar. Go to the gym 5 times a week. I bet you will start seeing losses in a week or two.

  • Hey. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time with this.

    First off, don't worry about being a virgin. It's just an experience you have yet to try. There is nothing magical about it.

    Second, I would recommend this: Get out more. A lot more.

    I'm not talking discos etc. But meeting guys and having relationships will be much easier if you are meeting a lot of people all the time (irl, not online). So what you need to do is to figure out activities, groups and events you are interested in, where there are guys too, and get involved in them. The more, the better. Gradually, you'll get much more relaxed in social situations. A great place to start would be to start participating in a team sport regularly. More effective and more challenging than exercising at home.

    I also imagine that since you have been bullied, it would help you to take matters in your own hands and just meet a lot of new people. That way, you get to control who you hang out with, rather than the other way round.

    Hugs and good luck.

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  • You will find someone eventually dear. Go on www.iifym.com and look up you macros and start following it it's a diet where you can eat whatever you want as long as you aren't over eating for your body. Macros are protein, fats and carbs, fiber is also important. Then go on www.myfitnesspal.com and download the free calorie counting app on your phone and your good to go. Good luck I hope you find someone :)

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  • You most likely need a better diet, because your weight is a health risk. Eradicate soft drinks like Cola and fast food from your diet. Decrease sugar intake. Eat more salads. And try to get some physical activity. It helps if you have a friend who knows how these things work. You really shouldn't be over 170 lbs at max.

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    • I've tried that for 2 months before and barley lost any weight.

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    • Triple the e, triple the cheese, triple the flavor.

  • I'm a Virgin too lmao. If people judge you based on that; they're not worth your time. Someone will come for you don't worry. Just be confident.

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    • Confidence never worked for me.

  • You are still young. Be yourself, do things you enjoy, and try to be happy. Sex and love will come with time.

    As for how you look, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. But if you are not happy with how you look, that is something that you can change. It will take time and hard work, but it is something that can be changed. Just be safe in the way you go about changing how you look.

    On the subject of being a virgin, I do not think that it matters. If people are giving you a hard time about it then they are defiantly not people worth paying attention to.

    I can somewhat understand where you are coming from. I am 22 years old and also a virgin (not entirely by choice).

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    • Yeah, but nobody will find me beautiful. You see a ton of women with larger guys but never a lot of guys with larger women

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    • I've tried exercising and diets nothing worked. The most I lost was 2 pounds in 1 month

    • 2 pound in one month is not bad. Do not be fooled by things you may see on the tv or Internet that talk about loosing large amounts of weight quickly. Loosing weight in a healthy way takes time and a lot of effort.

  • Guys like that are trashy. Don't be dependant for a man to fuck or leaning on your friends and whoever comes around for social acceptance. Shit like that will get you hurt and involved with the WRONG PEOPLE! A girl with a gut is NO big deal!! ;) Every man goes down the road of a big adventure eventually!!! So do not fret about when he will come, VALUE yourself MORE sweetheart!!!

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  • needless to say 200 pounds is a huge barrier if you want to find a guy. but it´s not only about that xD i am not fat or something but have the same problem and i´m 29 -.-

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    • I know it is but I'm trying to lose it. For now I'm fat and ugly. And when I'm skinny I'll just be ugly. Life sucks.

    • most people think they are ugly. me included. mostly there are enough people that don´t think like that though. good luck losing it :) it will sure pay off.

  • I haven't really decided my reasoning yet on why I like virgins. But I think it's because

    1. I may have a deflowering fetish.
    or
    2. I'm probably insecure and I don't like girls who have experience with other guys or girls who were more satisfying than me.

    I think you'll find someone. Being healthy should be a goal for you right now though.

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    • I get bullied for being a virgin though. I hate it,

    • Then don't tell people you're a virgin until you meet someone who likes you and you really like, and when they ask, bring it up to them in private. :P

    • I can't they'll probably break up with me for waiting so long to tell them. And I get bullied by the people in school cause I told a so called "trusted friend" and they told everyone in school.

  • getting bullied for it. wow that seems pretty childish. you should be proud to have held on. lose it when you are ready not when other tell you to.

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    • Yeah but the meaning of this post is that no one will want me cause I'm a virgin

    • thats b. s! if anything even more guys would want you. taking a girls virginity makes it that much better for the guy.

  • There are plenty of crazy dudes wanting strictly virgins. You'll be fine.

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  • 19 is still very young. Don't let peer pressure dictate your actions. You'll find the right person eventually.

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    • 19 is not very young. Soon I'll be a 30 year old virgin with no dating expirence in 10 years.

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    • Speaking as an adult looking back, it is young. Virginity is only as big a deal as you make of it. Screw what those people think.

      Take a look at the image at that link I posted. Words to live by. Take it to heart.

    • A lot of what guys at that age say is geared towards pressuring women to have sex with them by making them feel insecure about themselves. Don't fall for it.

  • The sex is not a competition. so if you are a virgin is not bad. And about the body is just hard work and you will see the results. Hard work and diet

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    • With they way people talk about it, it seems sex is a competition.

  • I would date a girl like you. Don't worry, you being a virgin means you have commitment and integrity. I too am also a virgin.

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  • Hey dont worry I'm in a very similar persition I'm an 18 year old male and still a virgin I'd love to find a girl whos also a virgin for my first time :)

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  • You need to get a better diet asap.

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    • I don't think its possible. I even tried a low carb diet and it didn't work.

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    • I didn't lose any weight after 2 months. I even exercised. Even as a kid I had a big gut. I'm thinking its a medical condition. I should see somebody for it I think.

    • Well then, good luck :)

  • I love virgins even larger ones so :P

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  • I am 20 and a virgin and athletic. When did most of your friends lose their virginity?

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    • Before age 18. Most of them were 16 or just turned 18. I'm so pathetic. I know that.

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    • Like I've said before, I've plenty of diets and exercise and nothing works. I'm baffled. Because even as a kid I had a big gut. Maybe its just genetics.. that would suck though.

    • Have yourself checked for hypothyroidism

  • in my opinion, it doesn't matter what you look like on the outside- who you are matters much more. Also don't let it bother you if you are a virgin, there are plenty of guys out there who might be the same way.

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  • just because your friends are sheeple who go with the flow it doesn't mean you should feel inferior. damn you should take pride on your integrity.

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  • Hey there's 7 BILLION people in the world! You might think you're ugly, but someone i the world will love you for who you are. You're 19, you have you whole life ahead of you. Don't let this situation bring you down. When the times comes im sure you will meet a wonderful man who will love you for who you are! Dont stress about it, there more you think about it, the more its gonna come bite you in the ass!

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    • I hate when people say I'm just 19. Yeah im 19 now but 10 years from now I'll be a 30 year old virgin with no dating expirence still. There's just no hope. No one will ever love me for who I am cause there's nothing to love about me.

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    • I can't open up or else I get laughed at and made fun of. That's why I want to kill myself.

    • Dont! Im here for you! Is there anything i can do to help? Anything

  • shit what you worrying about? A lot of girl would wish to be in your position right now. Your still a clean, young, beautiful and vibrant young girl. And guess what im 19 year old guy and im still a virgin. You shouldn't feel rushed, pushed, influenced, encouraged or persuaded to do it thats just straight wrong. You should feel comfortable and take your time finding an appropriate, righteous partner. Many people say sex ain't what its hyped out to be its not all that glamorous. But it is special and what you have right now is special because its what most people look back on and desire and wish to still have.

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    • I wouldn't say I'm beautiful. There's nothing about me that's beautiful really... I don't know why anyone would want to be a virgin it sucks. People call me a loser and maybe they're right.

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    • Because of social reasons. And I feel pathetic about it. My mom lost her virginty at 18. But she was prettier then me. Plus, there's a type of love I need that no friend or family member can give me. Like I said I get bullied for being a virgin.

    • who the fuck bullies you over being a virgin? Find yourself a righteous a man all these other guys will do is use you and pretend to like you. And dont feel pathetic theirs plenty of virgins around here is one typing right now. Sex is special and should be done with someone special and a lot of people given a second chance would do it different if they could. You're still young and those who look down on you are pathetic, theyre jealous of you. You need to have a talk with those who bully you (if theyre you're friends) and tell them you won't tolerate such abuse. If they make fun of you make fun of them back. Be strong and dont let these cowards get to you girl.

What Girls Said 11

  • You're only 19. I'm in the same boat and I'm 20. Huzzah! There's hope.

    Naw but really, I get what your feeling. I feel that way too sometimes. That doesn't make it true but we all fall into a funk.
    As far as losing weight goes, it's good that you have a buddy to do it with you. Most diets and plans fail because they're not sustainable and you're not building good habits.

    Right now, just focus on the exercise for a week or two until it becomes something you just naturally do. After the first couple weeks, then make another change. It's great that you are reducing your diet. However you need to make sure that you're eating a balanced diet. You need to make sure that you're getting all the nutrients you need.

    Also, most diets are just fads and not based in any truth. However if you want something safe and some guidelines the DASH (dietary approach to stop hypertension) is a safe and effective management tool. Again, slowly change over time.

    Also, if you're up for it, counting calories is not a bad thing. You just need to make sure that your comfortable and realize that calories are not bad. LiveStrong and other websites have tools to make this easier. You need to consume 500 less calories than you need each day to lose 1 pound a week. The LiveStrong app already calculates what your base intake should be. By exercising you increase the number of calories a day you can consume.

    Be careful that you don't get into a purge mentality, because that leads to eating disorders. Just take it slow and remember. It's about good habits.

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    • I ran some fancy math stuff real quickly. Maybe aim for eating 1700 to 1800 calories a day. Because you weigh more, it take more effort for your body to carry the weight so you can eat a bit more than someone with less weight. You can also reduce your intake to lose 2 lbs a week, but that would be incredibly difficult to create good habits with.

  • Hey there girl. I really wouldn't beat yourself down about this. I'm going to be 18 in almost a month , and I still haven't kissed, Helds hands , or dated a guy either, despite being on the more fit side. I'm a virgin as well so I'm not that far off away from you. I don't think it's totally a weight problem that guys don't approach you , it could be more of a confidence problem and that needy vibe you may be presenting to want to be in a relationship. You hsve to simply act like you're not neccasarily looking for one. Be your own person and simply don't give a damn without being arrogant. Continue on to be friendly and cordial. With the weight thing , it could be hypothyroidism that's causing yoor weight struggle so I would check that out. Try to avoid sugar, wheat , and dairy. No packaged foods and carbs aren't bad. Stuff like brown rice and sprouted whole grain bread are all good. fruits are great too but don't eat too much of it. Boost your intake of every vegetable known to man and include good fats like avocado , olive oil, coconut oil, etc. because good fats like that help you lose weight. Have more plant based proteins. And drink half your body weight in water and have some raw juices as well. Don't give up! Gotta be persistent and consistent

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    • Yes but many times I've tried dieting and exercise. I've went on a low carb diet with exercise for 2 months and didn't lose any weight ever since I was 4 I had a gut and I'm starting to think its a medical condition. It's impossible to buy nice clothes at my size. Maybe I should become an anorexic since that seems like the only girl guys prefer anyway.

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    • Why arr you in such a rush to get in a relationship at a young age? Most of the relationships you see around your age or younger really don't last really long. I would know because I've witnessed quite a few. So, you're really not missing out on much. You have many people who feel the same way as you do anyways. Hang tight. Choose wisely. Be cautious. Plain and simple.

    • I'm in a Rush cause I need expirence in dating.

  • U shouldn't care if u 19 and a virgin you still yung. I lost it this year @31yrs old yes I'd date and let guys feel me up with out going all the way but yes jst take your time. lots of guys will make you believe if you sleep with em youl be together and its not always like that ey. sometimes you do it with them and they'll still run off pulling a hit and run on you. so yes ur hormones are raging but make sure you're doin it for yourself and not for some douchebag. and girl don't be so hard on yourself if you on the thicker side you can still be sexy cause its in your mind. I'm thin people think I'm pretty but I used2 have a low self esteem so I ddnt attract good guys to myself but I'm learning to not take shit. so yes jst exercise put yourself first and everything will fall in to place. maybe you'll even land yourself a date ; )

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  • Hahaha
    I'm 20 and waiting for marriage. -shrug-

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    • You are a virgin? Wow

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    • Yeah, it's your choice. I have best friends who have all ready done it. I'm just old-fashioned I guess?

    • And there's nothing wrong with that.

  • You're going to be a lonely virgin forever.

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    • You're most likely right. When did you lose yours?

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    • Yes but many times I've tried dieting and exercise. I've went on a low carb diet with exercise for 2 months and didn't lose any weight ever since I was 4 I had a gut and I'm starting to think its a medical condition. It's impossible to buy nice clothes at my size. Maybe I should become an anorexic since that seems like the only girl guys prefer anyway.

    • And please don't tell me to not complain it's people like you is the reason I want to commit suicide. Maybe I should anyway.

  • there is hope for everyone, with billions of people in the world, there is one especially for you, all you have to do is be patient, give yourself a break you deserve it. Learn to love who you are and if you I mean you not everyone else, don't love something about you then change it but don't cause harm to yourself. It took me a while , I'm 26 I'm a bigger girl and a virgin , and I use to cover up , now Im proud of who I am, I'm 260 lbs of awesomeness and I'm not afraid to show it. I'm also proud of being a virgin, there is nothing wrong with It. Just be patient and get to know who you are. One thing guys love is confidence and once you take time for yourself you will gain it. Even though I'm a big girl, I'm confident and the guys love it. So don't worry so much about losing your virginity, you are not broken.

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  • I'm 22, in the same boat and I used to model. It's not all about looks, trust me

    You should lose weigh to be healthier, it's not magically gonna get you boyfriend. Other than though I don't really have any advice, as I said, I'm in the same situation. And I know how feel, I'm also embarrassed by it and I lie when people ask

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    • Yes but many times I've tried dieting and exercise. I've went on a low carb diet with exercise for 2 months and didn't lose any weight ever since I was 4 I had a gut and I'm starting to think its a medical condition. It's impossible to buy nice clothes at my size. Maybe I should become an anorexic since that seems like the only girl guys prefer anyway.

  • you're 19 and a virgin and that's what you're worrying about. Hun I'm 19 too and also a virgin. And I have never kissed a guy either. It doesn't matter. When the right guy comes, then it will be fine. Don't worry. I guess if you're freaking out then I should too. I haven't so you shouldn't either

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    • Yeah, but you're probably very beautiful and will find someone soon. There's no hope for me though.

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    • You've got to stop putting yourself down. Men like confidence and if you're confident then everything will be fine. So be happy and positive and confident. It will make a world of difference

    • Like I've said I tried confidence and it didn't work. Everyone still hated me.

  • I would like to recommend a blog to you called "The Rules Revisited". Google it. I don't think that everything he writes is LAW, but it does give you a lot to think about in terms of how the male brain thinks. I've read many of his posts and they talk about appearance, exercise, virginity, dating, meeting guys, etc. I think that's something that's worth looking into for you.

    Anyways, you're only 19 and still have a lot of life to live. Don't rule out all possible options. If you're in college, there are PLENTY of guys out there just waiting for you to meet. Exercise, eat right, put a bit of effort into your appearance, have good hygiene, and you'll be fine. And it's a big turn off if you call yourself ugly and put yourself down. Confidence is attractive! Be comfortable with yourself and others are naturally attracted to you.

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    • I've tried confidence before.. it didn't work. People still didn't like me. I may be only 19 but I have no expirence in dating or sex no guy will want me.

    • You have the wrong attitude towards your life and the things that you see problematic. Unless you change it, nothing else will change.

  • your time will come. Don't rush anything. As far as diet goes maybe talk to a doctor and come up with a meal plaan. Or choosemyplate. gov is a pretty good food tracker and can help with weight loss goals. Also, confidence is a huge factor in attractiveness. So try building yours up a bit b/c i'm sure you're great:)

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    • I've tried confidence before.. it didn't work.

    • You can't "try" confidence, it's something that becomes you. It's something you have to find within yourself and then build up. Because if you don't believe it then no one else will

  • Well you're very young there's still plenty of time for you to find a guy who really deserves you

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    • Yeah, but I feel left out. And it seems no guy wants to date a 19 year old girl with no expirence in sex or relationships.

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    • Talk to him about what? He picks on me all the time because according to him he's getting "revenge" on me for simply having a crush on him. I've known him since 5th grade. Also, he asks his friend if he likes me all time in front of just to get the typical reaction "ew! No!" From his friend, just to make me feel bad. It would probably be an embarrassment to anyone to be dating me. That's why I'm hopeless. Once I told this one boy I used to know that I was saving my virginty for the right man and he told me "that'll never happen unless they're desprate" and another time this other guy told me "good luck finding someone" sarcastically when we were having a talk about virginty. There seriously no hope for me. They're probably right, I'm worthless and will never find anyone unless a guy is desperate or has a fat fetish.

    • Oops sorry I didn't knew all this details

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