She has a boyfriend, but is cuddling with me. what's that mean?

There this girl, she has a boyfriend. but when we hung out (past few times) she has been cuddling with me, laying her head on my chest and playing with my hair. Little stuff like that. But I was texting the next day and asked why she won't kiss me, she said she would feel horrible because she has a boyfriend. she's a good girl, not a hoe at all. So I'm confused why she would be up on me like that. Help please?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yeah I've been in this situation. It's beyond sh*t and I totally get the confusion.

    Girls and guys cuddle and flirt with other people when they aren't happy in their own relationship and the attention she is getting from you with the cuddling and flirting is a nice little ego boost and a comfort.

    You have to be careful here because by the sounds of it she is just using you for the ego boost and doesn't have any feeling otherwise she would've broken up with her boyfriend to pursue you.

    What she is doing is borderline cheating but she won't cross that line. If you are familiar with the term 'on the hook' you will get it. She likes doing this for the attention but it won't turn into anything real. Sorry if this is blunt but I've been through something similar and it really f***ed with my head. My advice would be to just tell it to her straight. If you are into her and want something to happen then say that and if she isn't then move on.. plenty of girls out there.

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What Girls Said 6

  • She's a ho. Ur trying to justify her not being a ho because why? She hasn't kissed you yet? She hasn't blown you yet? Or tried to f*** you yet? Honestly she's a f***ing tease...she has a man, you know she has a man but she's flirting with you and your trying to make out with her.

    U should just skip all of the games...Whip out your d*** and let her get to work..bc she's a FAAAR cry from being a decent girlfriend.

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  • She sounds flirtatious and loves the attention.Perhaps she is having some issues with her boyfriend so being with you at least make her feel good and better.Its not a good attitude obviously,but some girls just behave in such way.Its actually can lead to cheating if both of you encourage it more.

    LOL@ the girl below who said she is a hoe.Hoe is defined as a women who has sex for money.How funny other girls insult one another to feel good about themselves.

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    • Well I didn't insult to make myself deep good, petitebrunette :) but nice try...u don't know the WHOLE situation (neither do I), but this boy (&I say boy because of his age) could be bartering other goods in exchange for her attention, it's not the simple I pay you sex these days... Do you know another name for her...bc I'd gladly correct myself...

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    • Well seeing that I just became a mod & both of my comments came before I was one, try to get your facts straight taster, prejudging much? AAAAND yes I'd call him a manwhore...if the shoe fits! FYI Taster-if you don't like the quality of mods on here, why piss & moan? Step up & become one if you can do a better job :D

    • What really annoys me the over use US English here in the UK (when there are British equivalents) and the word "ho" coming into over here. Whether she's promiscuous or not is NOT RELEVANT here. Anyway, I think people are being harsh by calling her a slag/slut/whore/prozzie ect. We don't know. A woman (or indeed a man) has a right to express her sexuality. Anyone who is sexually active and condemns someone who sleeps around is a hypocrite.

  • I just love how some of the stupid girls on here can't handle when their opinions are challenged and they feel the need to block someone. Yeah I'm talking bout you anonymous "best answer" user. At least I have the guts to use my real profile on here and don't cower behind my anonymity. Get a freakin life

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    • It's so funny that you & I are on the same page, 3boys4me! You must be a little older than some of these kids & someone who's seen little kids do this often! I agree with the anonymous comment 2..they want 2 throw digs but want 2 hide...it's the babies on these sites..good grief!

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    • That girl who said that she cuddles with guy friends is similar to the girl in this situation and the fact that she has blocked people kind of proves that she knows she's in the wrong. She's a d*** tease and enjoys every bit of the ego boost. Sorry hun (if you're reading this and wanna block me too) but you should probably cut out that sort of behavior cos you'll get a reputation for being a bit loose

    • I just don't get it at all. I love this site because there are such differing opinions and I love being able to express myself and hear other viewpoints. Never in a million years would I block someone for disagreeing w me unless they were harrassing me or something. If you can't handle other peoples opinions then you shouldn't be on here. I also don't understand why anonymous users are allowed to block someone.

  • She's not a good girl, she's a ho and that's why she be up on you like that. If she was a good girl she wouldn't be putting herself into compromising situations w guys other then her boyfriend. You're not any better either if you're asking her to kiss ya and cuddlin w her and stuff. You two deserve each other:)

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    • It looks like he believed that she was single and has an interest in him. The "You two deserve each other" is an absurd comment. If he was to allow her to come onto him like that KNOWING that she has boyfriend. Why would he come on here admitting confusion and asking for counsel. You see that train of thought doesn't make any sense.

    • Um maybe I'm missing something here but I never read anywhere that he believed that she was single. The very 1st line of his question states that she has a boyfriend so I have no idea what you are talking about. I stand by what I said that they deserve each other. She's borderline cheating on her boyfriend and this guy is putting himself in a compromising position w this girl.

  • She's probably going through a rough patch with her bf... Or is just a two timing bitch. Ask her.

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  • Some girls are more flirty than they should be because they don't realize how much it impacts you.

    For girls, they like to cuddle with their guy-friends, with their girl friends, with their dogs and cats and their teddy bears, and the blanket on the sofa, and with their mother and sister. Girls are touchy feely...and they are going to cuddle with their guy friends.

    So if it is very hard for you than maybe you want to tell her that you are not comfortable with it.

    Or if you like it don't say anything to her and let her cuddle with you.

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    • Excuse me for being so blunt. Didn't you read his question properly. Had you done so you have noticed the operative words " I was txting [sic] the next day and asked why she won't kiss me" and "I'm confused why she would be up on me like that" . So he WASN'T expressing personal discomfort.

      What he IS asking is why is she flirting with him she dating SOMEONE ELSE. (ie leading him on that hope for him and nothing is materalising).

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    • I'm sticking my my original answer.

      I cuddle with guy friends even though it's not romantic I still do it.

      It doesn't matter anyhow. The girl isn't married so she can do whatever she wants to do because her boyfriend hasn't proposed to her...she he doesn't get exclusive rights to her affection.

What Guys Said 4

  • She's not a whore, not, just a two timng little minx. There's a difference, but not such a big difference.

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  • It sounds to me that she's prickteasing you. What you have to do is TELL her. (in my experience it's hard to get a straightforward answer from a woman when you ask a simple question). Advise her that you don't like being led up the garden path. You could throw this to her "Imagine if you went to a famine infested country. Whilst there you meet some starving people and you communicate to them in such way that you'll offer them food, and they are LED to believe it.. You do return there with food and then have the audacity to say it's for someone else. Do you consider that behavior to be good?" Then make her know how dangerous her behavior is. If she want a relationship you then she should act differently. If she doesn't then say no and lead people on.

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  • That means she loves all the attention and is getting you hooked and her so she can use you later.

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  • I'm in a similar situation with a girl who has done more than just cuddle. In fact, I've actually kissed her many times, but not lately. She still lets me do all kinds of sexual things with her though.(apart from actual sex). I don't really think her boyfriend would be all that impressed if he found out.

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