Why Is He Not Asking Me Out?

Ever wondered why you can never get a date as girl? Why the cute guy always looks you over for your friends? Why even the socially awkward spotty geek doesn't bother with you?

Well, here's a run-down of what may possibly be wrong with what you're doing and whom you are.(these are generalisations, but are based in personal experience and read anecdotal stories, and some science)

1 - You're looks are doing nothing for you

It's got to be said: Men are visual creatures. Doesn't matter if you're Mother Teressa, if you don't look good, you're unlikely to pull in the guys. Most young women can look perfectly acceptable if they follow a few easy pieces of advise:

Lose the excess weight. Really, do it. You'll thank me later. Cut the processed carbs out, do some exercise. You'll look better, feel better and you may meet a nice chap whilst you're at it.

Clear your skin up. Stop smoking, get meds for your acne, use moisturizer.

Improve your hygiene, including your oral hygiene. Smell nice, get your teeth straightened and whitened, shave your armpits, top lip and legs.

Wear feminine and figure flattering clothes. Go to a decent fashion store and ask an assistant for help. A male one is preferable.

If you're really unfortunate by having a real ugly face, then you'll just have to work on being a sweet feminine girl (talked about later)


2 - You're too shy

Especially if you actually like quiet nice guys, this is a major point. If you don't flirt, don't give -any- eye contact, don't smile at him or laugh at his jokes, you're going to be seen as someone who isn't interested.

So do the opposite of these no-no's. You don't have to say much to him, but just make it known you're interested in what he has to say.


3 - You're too bolshie/manly

You're aggressive. You have a reputation as a slut. You curse. You drink to excess. You're not wanted for long-term relationships.

Make the link. If a guy wants a friend with male characteristics, he'll make a male friend. If you want to be treated like a lady, you need to act like one - this isn't to say you need to be some naive wallflower. But basic manners, showing him some respect and some trust in his decisions/opinions, not bad mouthing him in public or when he isn't around, all go a long way


So there you have it. To summarise for you, if you want the guy, you need to look presentable, be sweet, be friendly and make him feel like a man. You can't go too wrong with those pointers.
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What Girls Said 24

  • I'm #2

    Looks aren't a problem but when it comes to interacting with the guy I give mixed signals 😓

    Then I'm always acting uninterested so he Won't find out that I like him and eventually he looses interest. Self fulfilling prophecy all because I'm afraid of rejection 😒

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  • Some of these are pretty good points. I have difficulty with the second one, I can't help that I'm shy. I do smile and make eye contact, I laugh if he's funny but I blush a lot and am quiet at first.

    I just need a guy to stick around a tiny bit longer to see me open up passed my stupid shy stage, like my friends have. They see how I truly am for the most part.

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    • Well friends are different you probably weren't that shy because you didn't have the pressure of dating or the fear of losing their interest or acting like walking on eggshells wondering if they like you back

    • You are right for most of them. I was meaning the guys I liked and tried to date, but they didn't want to date me. So we became friends over time instead. :) I still like one of them, but he's dating someone, and I don't mess that up.

  • I do everything right and I still don't have a man...

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  • When guys write things like this I always feel like maybe I should stay single if all dudes honestly believe this

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  • I'll just sit here with my Big Mac and call it all bullshit. I'd rather have someone who takes me as I am than be different just to get a bloke. One of the worst articles I've seen in a long time.

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What Guys Said 28

  • He probably expects rejection. Who wants to be humiliated in private (or in public)?

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  • Can confirm some solid truth to some of these points.

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  • *YOUR looks!!! What's so hard people? English is not my first language, but this is very annoying.

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  • I'm not. Having flaws makes me human.

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  • We aren't all assholes. If we were, society would be different. The problem most guys have in regards to dealing with people, specifically in the mating game, is having a lack of backbone.

    But that discussion is for a different day.

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