In a world, where things aren’t always what they seem … where plain looking women with flaws can look like a “10/10 would bang and call back” … One woman DARES to reveal the secret that women have kept from men for centuries … and no … it isn’t what she wants you to do to make her not pissed off at you OR what it’ll take to make her want to suck your dick…
IT’S MAKEUP…
April 18th 2016 RJGraveytrain unveils the secrets of how women make themselves look ridiculously hot when their genetics just don’t add up … the secret … of MAKEUP.
Lol just kidding, it’s all black magic, voodoo and ritual human sacrifice that grants us the ability to put on face-cloaks that make us 10x hotter than we actually are.
All of my Paramount bullshittery aside: I am tired of the wanking and whining about how fake women are for wearing makeup, and that it isn’t fair because it tricks a guy into thinking she’s hotter than she is. But I don’t believe that makeup is a lie at all nor is it trickery, because it’s RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE! Women can’t hide the fact that they’re wearing a full face of makeup, its super obvious … to people who understand makeup. That’s right fellas, I’m not totally against you: the real problem is that the playing field isn’t level, because while makeup is very obvious to most women, it might not be to a guy who has no idea what makeup is all about. SO! I created this take for you gents today to help you understand what goes into a full blown face of makeup and how to identify it on a woman.
Note: not all of these products and steps are necessarily used in conjuction with one another, every woman has their own personalized method that controls what and just how much of what they use. Also be aware that this take is not going to cover EVERY SINGLE STEP to a full face of makeup, but rather the makeup techniques that I feel men may not be aware of. Most guys know how mascara and lipstick is applied, I assume anyway, so segments on that will NOT be included.
While this take is geared towards men, women who love makeup or are interested in makeup are obviously free to read along as you may learn something or find it entertaining. But, blabbering aside, let’s start the take:
Colour Corrector
Not all women use colour correction, but some of us do. Essentially, colour correcting is the art of using pigmented concealers to counter-act discolouration on the face by applying the colour that is opposite to that discolouration on the colour wheel. Here are the most common colour correcting concealers:
Mint – Used to counteract red tones.
Lilac – Used to counteract sallowness and dullness in the skin as well as yellowish pigments
Red/Orange – Used to correct blueish or deep brown tones (like dark circles or acne scars) on medium to dark skintones. In light applications it can also be used on lighter skin tones to treat dark circles.
Colour correcting comes before foundation and traditional concealer, and is typically applied in a minimalistic way, just enough to neutralize the discolouration. Simply place over dark circles, blemishes, scars, etc and blend gently into the skin before putting foundation over top of it. Here’s a video as an example:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2cWglwMRghw
How to spot it
There’s no real way to spot colour correction as it is often hidden under foundation and concealer. Unless your girl hasn’t blended it out, leaving behind traces of the pigment, there’s no real way to know if she’s got it on.
Note: for those of you about to ask why one would use both colour correction and concealer, that would be because many women prefer insurance of both concealers and like the brightening benefits of using both together, but neither is mandatory.
Foundation
Foundation basically serves as a second layer of skin – or rather as the skin we would have if natural wear and tear didn’t exist. Foundation is used primarily to create the illusion of more even-toned and even smoother skin, while providing a completed balance to the rest of your makeup look. Let’s face it: lipstick and eyeshadow isn’t going to look right on someone’s natural skin unless they are naturally … you know … an ANGEL.
How to spot it
Foundation used to be easier to spot because the colour wouldn’t match the neck perfectly, but we bitches got smart and blend that shit down now. So, how do you spot it? Really look at her face: does it look cakey at all? Does she have any lumps and bumps that are perfectly flesh-coloured? Foundation bruh.
Concealer
A concealer is typically a concentrated coverage makeup product that a woman will pair with a face of foundation. It goes overtop of the foundation to cover anything that the foundation couldn’t, like dark circles and blemishes. However, it can and is also often used to highlight and brighten the skin, which is achieved by using a shade that is 1 shade lighter than your natural skin or foundation colour. Women brighten and highlight the face with concealer by placing it under the eyes and dragging it down, on the chin and on the forehead. Sometimes even on the cheeks. This gives the illusion of brighter, more vibrant skin.
How to spot it
If you see a total absence of darkness around the eyes or any sign of blemish and the skin seems to have almost a satiny look to it, chances are your gal has concealer on. Look at the skin’s texture too: do you see lumps that are perfectly flesh toned? Just like foundation, that can be a sign of concealer. Also look for “creasing”; if you see that there are little skin coloured, slick looking lines around her eyes, corners of the mouth, nose, etc … that can be a dead giveaway.
Setting Powder
I won’t make this one too long since it’s a very simple item and a simple application; literally it just goes overtop of the foundation and concealer to keep it from getting slick and coming off during the day. There is all different kinds of powders, from loose powder to pressed, but they serve the same function. It’s often applied with a brush but it can also be applied with a damp beauty sponge.
How to spot it
Literally, if her makeup isn’t slick then she likely has powder on. If she didn’t apply it properly, used the wrong product, or used too much, you might notice dryness or cakeyness on her skin as well.
Contour, Blush & Highlighting
This is where the real trickery comes in! I put all of these together as they are intertwined steps that are vital for a flawless face. While I don’t personally contour myself, I know many makeup enthusiasts who do, and I certainly understand why.
We figured out how to change the shape of our face to make our features look slimmer AND sharper with the use of typically brown-based powders similar to bronzers. Essentially, contour goes underneath the “natural flush” (aka blush) we apply to the apples of our cheeks to enhance the appearance of our cheekbones, giving the face a more defined and even slimmer appearance. But contour doesn’t have to just stop there: when placed on the outer corners of the forehead, along the chin and jaw line, down the bridge of the nose, contour can make the face look sharper, slimmer and even smaller in some respects.
Then of course there is blush, which is simply meant to bring life back into your face as your foundation will remove any natural flush that you could have if your skin wasn’t covered. It’s an easy concept that I think most men get without me having to explain beyond it goes on the apples (or balls, lolololol) of your cheeks.
Highlight goes hand in hand with contouring; you can’t really have a great, full face without highlighting. Basically, highlighting does exactly what the name suggests: highlights key points of the face, bringing light back into the skin and even softening that contour. Where you want to highlight is entirely up to you, but most commonly the chin, nose, the upper portion of your nose bridge (between your brows), under eyes and around your contour is where you would commonly highlight. This is typically done with concealer lighter than your natural skintone, as I mentioned on the “concealer” section.
Below is a video of some INTENSE contouring and highlighting techniques. Please note however that not every woman takes it to these extremes, but this is the best way to get a visual of the full process.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_dLSy75M46o
How to spot it
If you see any kind of darkness or lightness on the areas that I mentioned in that section, then chances are, your girl has contour and highlight on. Really pay attention to it: does her face look really sharp? If it does, do you notice a difference in colour on the key points mentioned? Like the cheeks, chin, forehead, etc? You have your answer.
Highlighting
Wait, didn’t I just talk about highlighting? Well yes, yes I did, but there’s more than one kind of highlighting you see; there is highlighting with concealer, and then there’s highlighting with reflective highlighters.
I know: who knew this shit got so fucking intense?
A reflective highlighter typically has translucent or shimmering qualities and is used, again, to highlight the finger details of the face. It can give the appearance of a dewy complexion, or even a bit of sparkle or natural light to the skin. Its most commonly placed on the tops of the cheeks, on the very crown of where your blush would be. But it can also be placed under the brow, on the tip of the nose, and the Cupid’s bow.
How to spot it
Watch her turn her head: do you see light reflecting off of her cheeks? Or a soft shimmering in the light? She has highlight on bro.
Eyebrows
Ever see a girl that has perfectly full, perfectly matching eyebrows?
LIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!
Okay I’m being dramatic, but seriously, the saying “Eyebrows are sisters, not twins” exists for a reason. That was until brow filling became a popular makeup trend. You see, most of us are cursed with brows that just aren’t uniform, and are often sparce and uneven. Take it from a natural blonde here: the plight of the sparce, mismatching brows is REAL. So, what can a girl do?
Fill in her brows of course.
There’s many different ways to fill in your brows, because there are many different products to fill your brows in with: a pomade (a paste like substance), a pencil and powders – it depends on the look you’re going for. Essentially, brow filling creates a more uniform canvas for the face by making the brows more even, defined, and full, giving a more flawless finish to your look. This is typically done by applying the product to the outline of the brows and then filling them in, either with a pencil or an angled brush. Here’s a video for an example.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VKqwQnkzvTI
How to spot it
If her eyebrows seem darker or different to her hair colour and they are perfectly uniform, filled in, and upon closer inspection even appear overdrawn – she got a brow on bruh.
Alright this take was hefty take, but I think I covered most of the makeup steps men weren’t totally aware of. It’s important that I say while I am a humorous person, I don’t mean to offend women or makeup shame anybody with my cracks about trickery. Really, makeup in many respects is an art form and doesn’t need to be viewed as a negative thing, or as a “lie.” Now that men are in on the secrets, I hope you’ll think twice before calling a woman fake for loving makeup. After all, how can it be a lie if it’s right in front of your face?
… Or on your dick.
I mean, if you think about it, the chances of your girlfriend looking like Shrek under her makeup is slim to none right? On the off chance she does though ... marry her because she's a witch and she'll probably hex the SHIT out of you.
Have a good week guys!
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