My girlfriend needs "time" and "space" to think about our relationship, should I give up or stay and wait..?
My girlfriend an I are approaching our 1 year anniversary and right now things aren't so good between us..
there was a point a few months ago that...
update: I was talking to a guy who was there the night that this cheating happened, and he says that its gotta be BS because he was with me and left after I did..
also I told her that I was going to give her space and that we needed to stop the constant communication in order for her to make up her mind and that this was killing me to be talking to her like nothing happened.. this happened before the first update
Most Helpful Girl
I'd maybe apologize once more - in writing on a card with flowers.
After that - I'd back away and give her some space. Lay out what you want and tell her you'll wait for a while - but you want a relationship without recrimination and guilt - so if she can't forgive you and move one with you - you'll move one without her.
Seriously dude - do not give her that much power.
On the other hand - from her point of view - if she does take you back - then you need to be fully available and not thoughtless when it comes to giving her a sense of stability in the relationship. When I say this I mean you need to be emotionally available.
What Girls Said 3
she still loves you, but the fact that she found out that you cheated he questions if you two were to get back together if she can trust you
This is a tough one. I'm guessing that the reason you're getting mixed signals is that she loves you, but she has lost respect and trust for you because of your behavior.
If you are charming enough, she might take you back. But if this happens right away, it's likely that you'd continue to have problems because she isn't going to be able to forget that you cheated. I would advise not getting back together right away for this reason.
I don't know if she is thinking along the same lines as I am when she says she needs a break. What I'm thinking is that this might not be a bad idea if you do want to have a future together, because being apart from you might help her get past your behavior. She must be very angry right now. It's likely that she gets mad whenever she sees you. This could become a habit. If you spend some time apart, she might be able to calm down and recall the benefits of being with you (without seeing you and immediately feeling p*ssed about what you did).
If you do have time apart though, you should probably make a major effort to show her that you still care about her. You know her best, so you probably know best how to do this.
I don't know if this will work. I have been in your girlfriend's position before, and even though I took the guy back, I couldn't get over what he did and eventually dumped him. You will need to convince your girlfriend that you are sincere to have a chance of this working. Good luck!
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