See a girl crying?

What do guys think and feel when they see a girl crying in front of them? Oh, God. I cried in front of him.

I’m not one to cry in front of a guy. In fact it takes a lot to make me cry for a guy. But last night I sort of cried… In front of him. Ahh! To make a long story short we had been drinking and I’ve been messing with this guy for about a year before I wrote this long letter about how I can’t stand that he uses me. I told him to NEVER contact me again because I had strong feelings for him and he didn’t which broke my heart. Well, he never did get back to me after until four months later (now.) he wanted to hang out which of course I was all for it. So I go over to his house, drink. I’m drunk and we start playing strip poker and I lost (I know I probably shouldn’t had played this game with him but I wasn’t there to try and make a relationship out stuff because I know there will never be one. It was more for fun.) So at this point I’m drunk and I only have my panties on. So then I put my sweater on to cover myself up a little and we start talking about what happened four months ago. And I started to get a little emotional about it because my feelings are really true about him. I started to tell him why I liked him so much and why I thought he was such an a**hole at the same time. But when I started talking about it I got teary eyed. At that point, I stopped and didn’t want to talk about it anymore because I could feel a crying episode about to happen. And he saw me get teary eyed but insisted I keep saying what I was trying to say. And then I started to shed a few tears and he totally saw it. I didn’t burst out crying but it was embarrassing because I was drunk, half naked and emotional. AHHH!

What do guys think and feel when they see a girl crying in front of them?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I am very shy and very nice. Most guys will not be as shy or as nice as me. I do not know what this guy is like, because there are many many types of guys, or what he did when he saw you crying. That having been said, if a girl cries in front of me I need to help. My immediate instinct would be to comfort her however possible. Sometimes I am not sure how to do this so I just stand there, shocked, with a grimace on my face because I am feeling for her.

    If this guy wanted to "hang out" with you, then invited you to his house, gave you alcohol, and then asked you to play strip poker, and all these things were his idea, he is manipulating you for his own sexual gratification. He probably called you right away as soon as it occurred to him he could do this. He really is an a**hole and does not respect you and thus he is not good enough for you.

    For this type of I guy I would guess that he was thinking, when he saw you cry, that you are showing weakness, which is exactly want he wanted, because it would mean that he succeeded in manipulating you. Its good you stopped yourself from crying because I would guess that if you did lose control he would begin pressuring you for a lot more than strip poker. He probably keeps all types of stereotypes about women.

    I understand what it is like to be hung up on an a**hole that does not respect you. Bad girls are very attractive for me but eventually I realized that I cannot be serious with them, because they are not good for me. There is not a whole lot you can do to change him but you can work on trying to get yourself over him. Try dating or hanging out with different types of guys: maybe a shy, nice one? They will be uglier but it will be worth it.

    Oh, and avoid alcohol when he is near. He can't be trusted.


What Guys Said 11

  • Depends on the guy, the girl, and the situation.

    If I know the girl, I will probably talk to her about it, and I am not the cause of her crying, I try to make her feel better. This is a situation where I will talk to her. If she's really upset with something I've done, and it's a situation that isn't really my fault, and this is a common occurrence where she's always mad at me, but for no good reason (it's happened), I would either get annoyed, and tell her I'm ticked off with her bad attitude, and when she's ready to talk to me without nastiness, I'll be there; or I'd leave her alone till she calms down.

    Now, if I don't really know the girl, and I come in late to the situation, It feels really awkward, because sometimes I don't know their situations. Plus, I'm a bit shy, so I don't always feel comfortable going to talk with someone that I don't know, especially during such an emotional/ vulnerable time. On the other hand, I have that kind of "protective" kind of instinct where if someone is hurting, even just emotionally, I feel really crummy, and I want them to feel better. But it would be presumptuous, and a bit trite to say anything. Even changing the conversation seems awkward.

    There have actually been a lot of girls who have started crying and yelling loudly while talking to exes, recently, and it's surreal. Especially when their foreigners, because now it's even more of a conversation barrier if you DO try to talk to her.

    And if you happen to be around them (like sitting down next to them) already, it gets even more awkward. because you don't know whether to give them space, you're not trying to listen in but you can't help but hear all this, and if you don't say something, you can seem like an uncaring person; However, you don't really want to run off because it's like you don't care, or you're avoiding the awkward situation, or depending on the girl, she might think you really don't want to be around her. To a stranger, you might look like an uncaring boyfriend (you're sitting next to a girl, so the law of association applies). In just about any of these cases, you can come across as pretty insensitive no matter what you do as a guy.

    I've had exes start crying hysterically, and when I try to touch their back or hold their hand, they've freaked out, accusing me of just using the situation to make out, (which I don't often do even when they are in a great mood). If I don't do anything, I look uncaring.

  • Girl you probably shouldn't have even hung out with him.

    Strip poker just sounds like a bad idea in your case not even for "fun".

    On to your question when a girl cries in front of me it makes me feel as though she trust me enough to confide in me and break down. It makes me feel as though I am important enough to be her support.

    In his case if he uses you like you say, he is probably thinking "Yes, I got her.".

    He more than likely realizes you are in the palm of his hand...or at least he thinks it.

    In your defense you were drunk so that had a hand in it, but I can only imagine he thinks he has you.

    I mean he had you almost naked (there is no way any man wouldn't be thinking sex at that) and you cried not only in front of him, but because of him. He has you.

  • I can't speak for all guys. If she was alone, I'd ask her what was wrong and try to help her. Just be aware that many guys will turn a blind eye. Maybe not most, but a significant number.

  • Well that depends on how well I know this girl. But to be honest, I'd reach out to the girl either way. It's normal for a girl to cry, nothing to be embarrassed about. I'd be ashamed if I DIDN'T try and help the girl.

  • I've never seen a girl other than my sister cry. When my sister cries I feel like sh*t and feel like I have to make things better, but all I can really do is give a hug. Pretty pathetic.

  • when I see a girl crying if she's alone then I go to her and ask her what's wrong or try to make her smile or laugh. If there is no point in trying to make her laugh then I get serious and ask and be there for her. I feel sorry for them and yet at the same time I don't really think about what I feel. its just when I see someone hurt or crying then I just go and see what's wrong and try to make it better it the best way that I can

  • for me I cannot stand on a girl crying in front of me, I will feel that I had made a girl crying. if I am the guy I think I won't give up this relationship. sorry talk too much :)

  • Just watch it, how emotional your are! If your tears is valid then I will say don't worry will take care. If not then just watch it and say her how funny you are!

    And I never stop crying b'coz it emotional feeling which should come out.

  • Lol well, I personally like it. Not in some weird way, but it makes me feel "manly" and want to comfort her. Idk, I think it sort of brings out the sensitive ideals of women and makes guys feel like they should fulfill their roll and offer support. Unless its some random girl I don't know, then its awkward.

  • Once a friend girl was crying in front of me (she was sad). And It was very plaisant, I mean of course I was sad for her and I did everything I could to help her, but she was very cute when crying and since that day, I find her more attractive, more sensitive and I want to hug her every time I see her!


What Girls Said 3

  • ...It depends.If the guy is good he 'll try to comfort you and empathize the situation of your crying episode...He 'll let you know that he 'll always gonna be there for you whenever you need him and he is gonna keep that promise...But if the guy is -like you've already described- an a**hole then he' ll feel like he owns you and he 'll consider you as his pathetic victim and maybe he is gonna brag to everyone about it...In my opinion, it was a wrong choice that you went to his place and played strip poker with him...It's like you humiliated yourself in front of him...My advice?Change your sim card in your cell phone and never contact him again.If he tries to contact you, ignore him.


  • cause they feel bad for what happend

  • to be honest I do think they feel horrible if the lad is genuine but if they're up themselves it could make them abit big headed and that a bit obessive about them see lads can never see for some reason what they've done wrong kind of like my situation right now they don't seem to relise women have feeelings and that we are human beings sometimes I don't tink it is possible for them to treat us like humanbeings some of them treat us like a piece of merchandise its weird I know ...>:(

    but anyway if this guys a D***K am he prob got some twisted sick kick out of it and was braggin to his friends and his friends prob though he was being an ass but laughed at him anyway its an ego thing

    if he's a good guy will he prob felt horrible and was probably to embrassed to apologise for makin you feel the way you did

    my impression he's an ass don't have anymore got to do with him at all I know its hard but it gets easier as time goes on and you'll end up thinking back and cringeing at the thought of being with him rather than at the thought of what happened when it all blows over you'll be able to laugh at it sweetie just pay no mind to what he does and says in then meantime act like none of it happened and move on you'll get the better of him in the end

    remember the clock turns !;)

    • Yea I too cried in front of a guy I had really love at the time, and you know what he did. He laid next to me, running his fingers through my hair, until I was able to talk again. When I did, he cried. He was genuine, he showed he had feelings, wasn't a wuss.