Girl I'm dating (not in a relationship) is openly flirting with another guy on Facebook - How should I react

I JUST started dating a girl I like. She is only 20 and I'm in my late 20s. We've been talking for a few weeks. We then went on two dates. The first date went great. The second one even better (we had sex this time). We get along very well. She laughs and my crude humor constantly.

We are NOT in a relationship. I figure she's talking to other guys and I'm totally cool with it. I expected it (she's very pretty). I'm also talking/dating other girls but I don't mention it outright.

I haven't seen her in a few days. Tonight I went for a boys night out. When I got back I noticed this on her fb page (I edited the names):

Be Ah I texted you..its not polite to not text back

Ka I told you 7--------------------- times my phone doesn't let me text back ;(

Be Oh sorry..

Ka know...uuuuu suuuuck!

Be What that's rude..what are you doing

Ka hahahaha I'm looking up some stuff online and chatting on yahoo messenger. what about yourself!?!?

Ka when are you going to take me out on a date!? I won't be waiting forever you know lol..

Now I AVOIDED friending this girl on FB. I've had bad experiences in the past with girls and fb. However she friend requested me...and asked me about it. I couldn't really turn that down. Especially since I slept with her.

I was thinking about getting in a relationship with this girl (we do hint around about it). But now I'm thinking twice after this incident above. She can be a good FWB I guess.

Should I be p*ssed she was so obvious on a public place about her thoughts about another guy? Should I just forget about it? Should I just take this is as a sign that she is just a hook up buddy?

Again I she's much younger so I expect her to sometimes do/say things w/o thinking. Also we just started dating. I got no room to be jealous. But the fact she was so blatant somewhere public where she knows I would see it...

fyi "ka" is the girl and "be" is the guy she's flirting with
just to clear the confusion. I did accept the friend request on facebook from this girl a few days ago. She knows I can see everything on her profile plain as day.
also I didn't go out with this girl with number one objective to get laid. Yes she's WAY hot (she used to model) so I'm going have that on my mind. I went with the flow...and I got signals she wanted me tooo.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't see the problem personally, she's not putting all her eggs in one basket but neither are you as your also dating other people from what I understand of it.

    You have no right to be jealous or p*ssed because she's open about her other relationships where you aren't, she doesn't feel its needed to hide her relationships with others which is better then sneaking around or being dishonest about it in my opinion at least.

    However I agree and can understand your concern that it isn't really facebook material and if your worried that you might get something similar happening to you or have your friends read messages like that while knowing they are dating you, it'll reflect badly on you, just tell her that your not comfortable with that before adding her on facebook or don't add her on facebook and explain to her why.

    Avoiding someone doesn't make the problem go away, you'll need to figure out what you want from this girl and talk to her about it once you've figured that out.

    -Either avoid her and completely ignore her, she'll feel used and you'll come off as the bad guy, which quite frankly you are.

    -Either consider her as a possible FWB but then you'll have to live with the fact that you probably won't be her only one, as she's still dating other guys to get what she's looking for.

    -Consider going exclusive with her if you believe there's a potential relationship that'll lead to something.

    -Alternative option I haven't concidered yet.

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      I don't know about this situation. This girl approached me first. She has gone out of her way to me which is awesome. I was respectful...but yet entertaining as possible. I make her laugh and laugh and laugh. We almost had sex on our first date...but I stopped when said "I'm feeling tired" which is translation for.....I don't want to have sex right now. I respected that. I didn't want her to feel like a slut.

      The second date we went on I knew right away she wanted to sleep with me.

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      I'm not planning on just "getting rid" of her after the hook up. But I want her to ask the question about going further in the relationship.