I know he loves other things about me, but it makes it really hard to get into sex when I know he'd rather be screwing someone with bigger boobs, blond hair and blue eyes. Especially when he's so open about what kind of p*rn he watches and how much. Yes, I'm sure he thinks I'm "good enough" but I will NEVER be that attractive to him without surgery, and it sucks.
Do I need to know this stuff? Ugh.
Before anyone asks: Yes, he is my preference, so it's doubly frustrating.
The follow up: I dumped him for a guy that's crazy about me and makes me feel like I'm worth something. No regrets. Let this to be a lesson to all the girls that could empathize.
hes a dumbass first off who tells a girl what kinda p*rn they're into like come on this dudes obviously a pure douche and doesn't really appreciate you all that much and you should dump his dumbass lol
I find it really really really disturbing and makes me angry your guy has acknowledged that you are not his type. He actually said he would prefer all that to you?
I think you need to play the break up game.. It won't fix him for good but jeez. Since he tells you this he probably doesn't realize your a person. Honesty only goes so far till you tell someone there they are good enough..I think the proper feeling is 2 feel like they are 2 good for you mutually.
o-kayyy, well you gotta ask yourself, foes he truly LOVE you? love you absolutely and unconditionally? and he's not just settling to get some- to USE you as a sexual object? tell him how you feel about this, real, deep. unconditional love will see you as infinitely attractive, attractive above ALL others.
I am not so sure I could stay in a relationship if I felt that insecure about what my partner thought of me. You do have choices which include putting all this out of mind and just remember you can't be all that bad as he has apparantly decided he likes something about you.
The other would be leave him if you are that disappointed with the way you think he is thinking.
Look, you should NEVER feel not good enough for a guy. If he's with you, that's a good sign, If he's into p*rn, he's a normal guy, if he KNOWS that this bothers you...He's a DOUCHE and trying to make you feel bad.
Tell him he can watch his p*rn, but he doesn't have to tell you WHAT he likes that YOU cannot be without (painful and UNNEEDED) surgery...
I'm 5'4'' a FELLOW brunette (I kinda went blonde...but I don't feel as pretty now...cause it's...not me...the person in the mirror feels fake to me, I always expect to see brown hair...)
Changing for him will only make you feel worse about yourself because that's accepting the (Totally false) assumption that you're not good enough
Everyones equal, even though some people are A$$E$ :) Hope it helps.
I've been here and here's how it turns out. His line was I'm attracted to blondes but date brunettes.My competitive nature won out and I did it and accomplished it in 21 days. Now it has been over 10 months and the guy has turned out to be a jealous freak and it is no longer about love but possession. I bleached my beautiful long chestnut hair platnium & dark blond, I gained 7 lbs to go from 34 B/C to 34 D and now I have a butt that pops out. I had to exercise all that new fat to muscle so I wasn't a fatty. Then I changed my makeup to be p*rn worthy too. I do have the blue eyes but would have been willing to wear colored contacts and for what everyone of his ex girlfriends were very overweight and /or not attractive but I did it. Now I'm always getting whisteld at and leered at and he is so insecure that it did not turn out the way I had thought it would be.
We are still together because he has a ton of great qualities. Now he tells me if something can be taken the wrong way disregard it.It's just the ahole in him speaking and not to listen.
P.s. I also did the penis thing regarding comments and now I have to reassure him all the time it's fine down there. :(
You should feel great. This guy thought you were so wonderful, that he didn't care if you didn't fit his usual type. Plus, we never know what really works for us until we try other things. Maybe he did prefer other types before, but now he realizes you are his type. This happens on the time, it just goes to show what we "want" is not always what we "need."
I have that same problem, my boyfriend thinks asians are hot and every time we see an asian girl he tries to be funny by letting go of my hand while we are walking or whatever. It bothers me at times but you shouldn't let it. You should be confident about your own look and if he didn't like it I'm sure he wouldn't be with you.
first off why on earth would he have to watch that if he has you.? And I'm sure he likes your boobs but don't change for him its not worth it if he loves you then he loves you. YOur looks shouldn't matter.!
Taylor Lautner is my physical preference, but it doesn't mean other guys aren't hot to me. It is the same with your boyfriend, Paris Hilton might be his physical preference, but it doens't mean he thinks ever other girl in the world is ugly.
my boyfriend of 6 years does that to me about blond hair and blue eyes. my boyfriend loves my body and he thinks my butt is the hottest think ever but one day he said I should dye my hair blond and I was like hell no and he said well I never had sex with a blond before and want to and I was like fine go ahead leave go have sex with a blond and he said no I want to only have sex with you and you have blond but it bugs me because why can't he just like everything about me. so now he knows it bugs me so now he tries to say oh I only like brwon hair and hate blondes but now he is only saying that because I yelled at him about it. I hate that guys just can't like how we already look and want to change everything about us.
I feel like you do I'm a big girl well I wa really good looking when we firt got to know each othe we have a baby know and I got big I just had my baby 3 mnts ago and we never have sex now he never tells me am cute are sexy It sucks to feel like this and men just donot see it I have had that feeling that I need to have something done I tell him to see if he will tell me I don't need it but he just looks at me crazy not even whn o tell him that I feel ugly he nevr tries to tell me he loves me the way I am sad but that's how a lot of man are now I wish I could have a man that would make me feel good oh well girl I can only tell you this men are never haippy about what we are or what we do they are all di*#s RIGHT
I know exactly how you feel.. I have brown skin, and dark hair, but my white boyfriend prefers blue eyed blond girls. He tells me he I'm one of the most attractive people he's ever seen, but I don't believe him. He's matches my preferences for physical appearance exactly, but I don't match his. Ever since he almost left me a year ago (we've been together almost 4 years) for a blond girl he thought was attractive, I haven't been the same. I can't walk by an attractive blond girl while next to him without feeling uncomfortable. Every day I feel like I'm not pretty enough, and there's nothing I can do about it. : / I know if he met a blond girl that he found more attractive than me, and that had a decent personality, he'd leave me even though personality/interest wise, we were made for each other. I know he could get any girl he wanted, because he's so attractive and charming. :x
I went through this. In the end, I realized my ex was pretty much ridiculous in the way he could pick apart features on a woman like we were mail order blow up dolls or something. He wasn't actually a jerk about it, but it didn't make me feel great in the beginning when I knew there were things I could never change, even with surgery.
Consider how he treats you. Is it you that is picking up on everything or is he telling you these things? If he is loving and caring and isn't asking you to change, I would let this go and figure out how you can work past it.