My boyfriend told me I need to go to the gym?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend recently went back to work/school and has stopped going to the gym the past few months. He used to be a pretty decent body builder type, 8 pack and all that nonsense. The other day he was eating his third cupcake after dinner and I was like careful babe, you're not going to the gym anymore :p He then responded with "if anyone needs the gym in this relationship it's you, when was the last time you went?" ... I usually train 5 days and I'm really not big... about 5'4 and 118 pounds... I've been sick for two weeks so I haven't been but I found that super harsh. Is he finding I'm unattractive or something?

[Camallunt]

He was being defensive because you came across as attacking him. Those sweet little reminders when someone is indulging only come across as nasty to the recipient. He is aggressively defending himself because he felt vulnerable.

Don't take it too personally. He is going to feel self conscious and that will make him more sensitive to criticism. If he wasn't happy with your body he'd made it clear with physical signs not sudden outbursts after what he felt was a dig.

[dartmaul15]

A sarcastic remark in reply to a missunderstood teasing. that's what i'd guess it is. At least unless he doesn't repeat it.

[Asker]

ya... he asked me again today if I was gonna go!!!

[dartmaul15]

Well, your BMI is perfect so unless you're seriously lacking either in strength or endurance i suggest he should shut the F**K up

[Asker]

haha nope; guess he's just an asshole :P

[dartmaul15]

Well, what do you do with assholes?

[Asker]

dispose of them! :P

[dartmaul15]

No. You tie them to the bed, ass up, then gives them a firm pegging until the asshole have become a nice obedient bitch.

Seriously though, you are right. If that's his true colors, then you dispose of him.

[Asker]

ain't nobody got time fo' dat! hahaha

[dartmaul15]

aww come on, it could be fun. And it could be a fitting revenge to break him completely. You might just be thorough enough to make him a suitable pet XD

okay enough joking arround. If he truly is an asshole, i guess it's better to leave him.

[Asker]

plus I'm 22, I have time for commitment later :p

[dartmaul15]

Exactly. At our age commitment isn't given, even if i'm damn sure we'd commit if we found the right guy/girl :)
We have plenty of time to try again, and again.

[Asker]

not true... I'm deeply committed to me bed once finals finish every semester :P

[dartmaul15]

XD that's true. But i was ttalking about boys/girls now, silly. Not your bed.
We all know just about everyone would marry and make love to their bed if it was possible

[Poppykate]

He is just reacting to your comment. Maybe next time just be a little more sensitive about his weight. Just remember guys are sensitive too.

[Stuart-Brent]

He's probably more upset with himself for letting himself go, and you sort of called him out on it, so he externalizes it and attacks you instead of saying "holy cow, you're right, this is my third cupcake."

Maybe you can encourage him to join you at the gym sometime soon?

[Theguyoverthere]

He probably didn't like you criticizing his eating habits and is throwing it back at you.

[georgemina1998]

look i hav two opinons he cares about your health and wants u to be healthy second i feel he looks to u as a body not for the prsonaliity

[Anonymous]

What a dick I can't believe he said that to you. That is way too much of an escalation from what you said. Also 5'4" 118lbs is perfect body weight.

[Anonymous]

Let me get this straight you told him to be careful for eating a cupcake? But yet you only went out with him because he had a 8 pack? See the hypocritical statement there.

[Asker]

hahaha that's not why I went out with him. I was just teasing him cuz he can't go anymore because he doesn't have the time!

[Opinion Owner]

Right sure that's not the reason why. Because if he was 350lbs you'd still go out with him. Give me a break.

[Asker]

haha probably not... but I actually didn't know he was in that great of shape when we first started seeing each other. We met outdoors... during the winter... in Canada. Nobody's walking around shirtless :p

[Opinion Owner]

So your admitting to being shallow and only liking guys who are muscular. Wow who would of guessed.

[Asker]

Didn't say that either. Just said I probably wouldn't have dated him if he was 350 pounds, That's obesity that's unhealthy, so no I wouldn't date him.

[Opinion Owner]

But that makes you shallow.

[Asker]

no... that's not having something in common with someone. I care about my health and it's a big part of my life.

[Opinion Owner]

But rejecting a fat guy is shallow. It as nothing to do with health.

[Poppykate]

I am going to comment here. I sort of agree with the girl. My sister is married to quite a large man, and quite frankly, it is doing damage to their marriage. Because he is overweight, he sleeps a lot. She is really activate and has developed many hobbies. She plays football, trains little kids, is working towards her teaching degree while working full time. He comes home from work, has something to eat and then goes to bed. (He works normal hours). It is like they are living to separate lives, and it is really sad! Because I am sure she would love him to watch her play football, or help with the coaching. But he is always too tired.

[Opinion Owner]

@Poppykate has it ever accord to you maybe his job is harder/stressful? And why I'm not surprise you agree with her. That's your sisters fault for dating a guy like that.

[NZDSTR]

I do 3x per week at the gym 2x per week playing Basketball

[Asker]

gotta keep busy :P

[NZDSTR]

Yes , I've always been active since a young age and get bored easy. Plus get to be social with people that have similar interests to myself. Which is awesome.

[Asker]

haha me too, my dad told us to pick a sport every year :P didn't care which but we had to pick one!