How can a man be attracted to his wife with sagging breasts?

[Anonymous]

This question is only for guys. My husband is very attracted to me and we have an amazing sex life. He is extremely handsome. I want to be as attractive as possible for him. Even though he fell in love with me when I was 70 pounds over weight and has never ever been critical or had trouble performing, I still want to be thin like I used to be so I can wear sexy lingerie. He has never seen me thin, although I was thin and fit for most of my life. I want him to know the real me. I am planning to have my extra skin removed and have a full body lift. He said he loves me with sagging skin and not to worry about it, but when i told him I needed to have the body lift to feel good about myself he became very supportive. I am in my mid forties. My face skin looks young. My husband says not to bother with getting my breasts lifted because he is worried I will lose sensation. He says he likes them the way they are... But I am so white I am transparent and I can see my blue veins through my breast skin and my breasts sag from nursing my babies. I am wondering if men can really be attracted to breasts that are droopy and have visible blue veins? Is he just being kind and loving? Or are men in their late fifties and older attracted to realistic non perky breasts? How can a woman dress to look as attractive as possible with somewhat saggy D cup breasts?

You don't mind your wife's saggy breasts because love transcends all that.

You secretly wish your wife would have a breast lift.

As long as the sex is great, sagging breasts aren't a big deal.

Updates

+1 y

I am extremely touched by the answers the guys have provided. I lost so much weight that skin can't tighten up enough. I want to have the skin lift because I gained that weight years ago as a reaction to a severe trauma I went through. When I see the sagging skin, I am reminded of the trauma. Also, I want my husband to know what I looked like when I was thin. And I want to wear better clothes! And lingerie would look silly with ab skin hanging down below my hips.

Updates

+1 y

You guys are awesome. Thank you so much for helping me to see that I have stereotyped men and underestimated them. You all have said such helpful things. I feel much better as a woman. Thank you all so much.

[dricky2011]

when you look at yourself in the mirror, you are the only one who sees what you see, when your husband looks at you he sees someone different, when i see the woman i love i still see her the she was when we first met, i know she i just an average looking woman, nothing anyone would call very beautiful yet when i look at her i see the most beautiful woman i have ever seen, she has stretch marks, small breasts that are not perfect shape after two kids, her ass is getting bigger, there are parts of her that she would love to change, if i could one thing, i would show her what she looks like through my eyes, i wouldn't change a thing if i had all the money in the world to do so, to me she is perfect. maybe your husband feels about you the way i do about her

[BertMacklinFBI]

can't you just accept that he doesn't care about boobs because he loves the shit out of you? holy fuck

bee-tee-dubs im not being mean :D incase you thought otherwise hahaa

[skeptic007]

yup he's right

[becca123]

I am truly stunned by all the positive and supportive male replies here. Way to go, guys; very nice.

I don't personally think you should get any lift job, chances are things will tighten up with the removal of the skin anyway.

[Asker]

Thank you for your compassionate answer. It was very reaffirming. Nonetheless, At my age this kind of weight loss has left an apron of skin sagging below my hips. It is a reminder of what I did to my body, of a trauma I went through that led to the weight gain, and of the dark and sad place I was in at that time. It isn't just a little tummy tuck. It is a lot of skin.

[becca123]

I'm cool with that and understand 100%. Several acquaintances of mine have had the procedure done:)

I still think it will tighten your chest area by default though, so hold off on a boob job. :)

[GingerBiscuits]

I think he knows the real you that you refuse to accept.
He loves you in your skin & finds you terribly attractive.
Stop demeaning yourself based on an unrealistic concept as we all age & things happen.

[sakurawizard1024]

But it is not healthy to be overwight, and that is what he is not about.

[GingerBiscuits]

That was not the question, she's judging herself short based on the exact things her husband finds attractive about her.
Losing weight for healthy is a totally unrelated topic here.

[Asker]

He doesn't care one way or the other if I finish losing the weight or get the skin tightening. He just wants to support me with what I want. He makes it clear that he loves me just the way I am, but would also be attracted to me if I finish this journey.

[GingerBiscuits]

Asker - will you be able to overcome your past trauma & transitional body image in your mind regardless of any corrective procedures?
Your post is obvious that you aren't happy with the self image, which is understandable with the extra added info, but be sure that your motives are balanced for yourself & your marriage.
I wish you nothing but the best in your journey in overcoming this chapter of your life.

[Asker]

I like your phrase "transitional body image." That's very helpful. I will meditate on that. Still going to have the surgery, but thinking in terms if a transitional body image is definitely healing for me.

[AthleticMom]

A but C has merits
plenty of positions that make any breast attractive enough to add to his hardness

[Bushcrafter]

What you may consider to be sagging breasts may just be perfectly normal breasts that don't match your idea of what they should be.

Also, you've got to realise that no matter what the media says guys don't all necessarily like the same thing.

And... you are his wife. That probably (and should) means he loves you. When you love someone you love everything about them and that includes little 'imperfections'.

[ricke92m3]

You've got a keeper. Obviously I'm young so I haven't experienced it yet, but there's something beautiful about growing old with the woman you love, and even though her body isn't the same as it was, it's still beautiful.

[Browneye57]

Do what you think is right. Just know that a man loves the woman, not whatever her body turns into over time. They still remember you from the beginning.
My wife says the same thing - "God made you blind to the real me." Together almost thirty years.

Getting old is not for amateurs. :)

[kwsmith2]

Yes, most men and nearly all women prefer perky breasts to sagging. However, you should remember that as a straight man your husband is attracted to your feminity. In the same way that you likely prefer a small hard dick to a falcid one or a vagina, right? Sheer masculinity is better than disinterest or feminity.

That having been said it is probably true that he would be most turned on by lingerie of other support that presented your assets in the best possible light

[dudeinohio]

As we age, we become more mature and appreciate the important things. He's committed to you.. Evidently, you've treated him well and he respects that. He appreciates you nursed his kids and gives you credit for that. You have a keeper.. don't analyze.

[MrExplorer]

I vote A.
As we get older, both men and women will have body issues that outsiders may find "unattractive", but if the couple loved each other to begin with, and still love each other, then those things won't matter. A woman's breasts may sag, a man's penis may shrivel, both may get all wrinkly and spotty, but if you love each other that's all that matters.

[Werewolfy]

I really wanted to vote A but since we're incapable of thinking about anything (let alone about the transcendence of love) when our girls are naked in front of us, I'll go with C.

[Ihav2fart]

Thats like asking how can a man be attracted to his wife when she gets wrinkly...

Contrary to popular belief our love goes beyond the physical attraction...

[blondfrog]

If I am going to be honest it depends how saggy they are I don't mind if her breasts are a little bit saggy, but to the extreme I would be turned off I wouldn't leave my wife though I would help her lose the weight naturally.

[Asker]

I completely understand that. I am very empathetic about men actually having to become physiologically aroused enough to produce an erection, and visual stimulus is important to that process. The issue isn't really the weight loss-- the weight loss actually makes sagging worse. My husband is happy enough with my appearance that he doesn't want to risk me losing nipple sensation... But weight loss isn't enough. There simply is no method other than surgery to correct sagging breasts. I guess one natural method would be to wear a very pretty bra when arousal is important.

[blondfrog]

Yeah that makes sense exercising would help though. And to be honest yes us men are visual, but women are visual too just not as much as guys.

[Asker]

Yes. I am visual, but if my husband developed a physical attribute that I just found to be a complete turn off, I could still have sex with him because I could just use some lube to compensate for lack of physical arousal-- so my emotional love for him could be expressed through intercourse without him having to know how much his appearance bothered me. But if a man is completely turned off by a dramatic change in a woman's body, it would be really hard to get an erection and maintain it-- so it really is a lot of pressure for you guys and that must be hard. I guess she could use other methods to bring about arousal for him-- I don't know enough about male physiology to know if that would be enough to compensate for a severe visual turn off. Would it be?

[blondfrog]

Well it depends on the guy usually, but psychologically as long as she still had that one physical feature that was really attractive it would make for the other parts of her that are physical turn offs. And he obviously still gets turned on with your saggy breasts so why are you making it such a big deal? Do you feel like you don't deserve him?

[Asker]

No. I just wonder how it's physically possible because I know for a fact if I were a guy I wouldn't be attracted to myself. My husband obviously is attracted to me. He says all the time that he thinks my sexy. I just can't understand why he would think that-- but I don't tell him that.

[blondfrog]

Well believe it sister you are one sexy piece female for us guys it goes way beyond the boobs, butt, legs and other stuff.

[kheserthorpe]

C, definitely describes things.

When sex isn't great, I'm more aware that I could land someone younger. When things are good, I'm happy.

[bryon]

If a perfect body is all that matters then don't get married unless it's to a manaquin. It the only way to avoid this problem

[Harry8814]

I prefer large, sagging breasts. The size, and weight, coupled with inevitable sagging, is just amazing. Sagging breasts are particularly sexy when they bounce around during sex, or when they just dangle, asking to be caressed and gently squeezed.

[plinkett]

I actually prefer saggy breasts, I think they are the sexiest kind of breast. I like nothing better than to see a girl take her bra off, and see a droopy pair of breasts fall out and sag to her waist line.

[jacquesvol]

As long as the woman is great, sagging breasts aren't a big deal.
As long as the sex is great, sagging breasts aren't a big deal.

[Anonymous]

A woman is not her breasts.

You love a woman. I've never heard a man being in love with his wife's breasts.

[BronzedAdonis]

given your age OP this is a oddly childish and superficial thing to ask

[sakurawizard1024]

Shagy bagy doesn't matter. But I don't think he thinks actualy it as beauty but he loves you and makes it pretty becouse you make him happy

[Anonymous]

It's rather exciting infact seeing your wife's body change in front of you.
She has gone through so much for the family it wouldn't matter the least if her breasts sag as she grows older.

[WitchKing]

Never getting married. Not good with commitment.