He loves me as well as his girlfriend. What do I do??

i know a guy from last more than 5 months. We study together and stay in the same hostel. We bonded well right from the beginning and spend more then 16-17 hrs a day together. He used to show a lot of affection and possessiveness. Slowly I started liking him but I never said anything 'coz he already has a girlfriend from 2 years who used to study with him. One day in impulse we made out. That time only I expressed my feelings for him and he also admitted that he had feelings for me. After that we made out 4 times and every time he used to feel bad for her girlfriend who stays in a city that is 3000km from our place. The remedy to all that what I suggested was that we stop being so close and stop spending so much time together but he said he doesn't want to loose me as a friend. I would have restricted myself but since his room is just opposite to mine avoiding him is very difficult. He is very possessive and doesn't let me talk with someone else. But at the same time when his girlfriend calls, he just forgets everything else which makes me feel very bad cos I love him so much now. He loves his girlfriend so much and they keep on sending gifts to each other regularly. On the same side he keeps on saying that he can't be mine because he already has a girlfriend yet again he cuddles me every now and then and also becomes very uncomfortable if somebody else in our class who has a crush on me, talks to me.

I love him so much. My life rt now revolves around him only. His cuddling me confuses me on the same side his love for his girlfriend makes me feel not so happy like earlier when we were just friends.

I will never ask him to leave his girlfriend rather I would like if he makes the decision on his own. Wearing the just friend tag is very difficult. what should I do? can I make him mine by any chance.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Why on earth would you reduce yourself to a guy with a girlfriend? Let alone a possessive one? That is a strong indication that he suffers form insecurity, and the fact that whoever you talk to you is none of his business. He doesn't respect you because he obviously doesn't respect his girlfriend. The fact for that on each end is that one, he's cuddling with you every other night and the other is that he sends his ex's gifts. They are pity gifts if you ask me. Mimicking his guiltiness and poor choices.

    As a woman it's natural to take the submissive role, but your giving this young man far too much control in your life. He doesn't deserve it, and neither do you. This may be hard to hear, but he is basically playing two women at the same time. Each one a fall back plan, in case one woman finally gives him the boot. In my opinion, I'd suggest you'd be the one to do so. Move out, find another place to live or do what it takes to prevent him from manipulating your feelings. If he's cheating on his girlfriend now, what makes you think he wouldn't do the same to you?