What Australia is Really Like

Everytime I look up my own country, I come up with results for the top ten deadly animals, all being in Australia. I come up with ignorant people from the Northern hemisphere stating that I live in a dry, hot, bogon country where everyone drinks, swears and dies from snake bite or crocodile attack.

I don't.

I want to clear up a few misconceptions about my home for all the people who both don't live here, and have never been here.

What Australia is Really Like.


First off- I don't live in a desert. My whole life I've either lived in one small town, which really wasn't that small, and now I'm living in Geelong city which is just that. A city like any other. And it's freezing. Back in Colac (my old home) our schools would give us the day off if temperatures rose above 35C (95F) and the heat would be humid. That's Victoria though. Perth, in WA, is bloody boiling. It's a dry heat over there and the time I visited was in the middle of a two week long heat wave, of 35C and up. Dry heat is a lot worse than humid heat.

Second- Nobody rides kangaroos. We don't own kangaroos. They're not pets, they're not cute and cuddly, I've seen one growl at an idiot who thought walking right up to it was a good idea. It's not. Do you know how much strength they have in those legs and tails? They're like super kick boxers. You don't want one of those buggers angry at you, or going over the hood of your car. If you hit one, chances are the kangaroo will be fine. Your car will not.

Third- If you see a koala on the road, don't stop on the bend and walk right up to it, and especially don't get your three year old kid to pat its back. Koalas are less cute and cuddly than kangaroos. Have you seen those claws? My Outdoor Ed. teacher was driving on the GOR one day and had to stop because there were a bunch of tourists who had decided to go up to the koala on the road, surround it, and start patting it. Koalas are wild creatures. They better be glad they found one who was pretty relaxed, otherwise that three year old? Yeah his face would have been gone. And furthermore, they're not bears.

Fourth- Drop bears. Bunyips. They do not exist. Drop bears originated from one guy having a koala fall out of a tree and happen to land on his head or something. Like I stated before, koalas are not cute and cuddly. I'm pretty sure that guy lost his face. And vegemite is not a repellent for drop bears. I don't know shit about the bunyip myth. So just know they aren't real.

Fifth- I go to a great school. I get just as good education as the rest of you. I don't even know where it comes from that we have less education than whichever country it is that thinks they're better.

Sixth- We don't all drink. Most of us do, there is a thing that you're not truly Aussie if you haven't gotten drunk before you're eighteen. But then there's a thing that you're not truly Aussie if you don't like vegemite. But we aren't all like that. That's more for the people who have families that you need to be drunk to get along with.

Seventh- We're not as accepting a country as people seems to think we are. Sure we're the 'free country' and all, but do you know how many people are getting jacked with all these religious folk coming in and screwing up our shit? I mean seriously, my primary school can't celebrate Christmas anymore just because you think it's offensive? I think it's offensive that you're taking away our celebrations. Don't like it? Fuck off to your own country. I am not going to start wearing a supid... whatever it is your women have to wear to cover their faces just because you say so. (and yes, they're trying to do that to us now. Not so free a country now is it? We're being over taken by dicks who torture animals for fun)

I would come up with more if I could think of more. But if anyone has any questions or wants to tell me I'm wrong, feel free.

If I get enough feedback I might feel motivated enough to make another with more points.


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BaileyisDarcy is a GirlsAskGuys Editor
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What Guys Said 17

  • What I hear about Australia is about voters choosing Abbot

    images.smh.com.au/.../...7085428785391-620x349.jpg
    i.guim.co.uk/.../...a07d-8ecadc0ed166-620x372.jpeg

    About a really big country of immigrants with vast spaces but hating newer immigrants and despising aboriginals. (The previous PM got ousted because he mentioned apologies for what ancestors did to aboriginals)

    I know for fact there are are Australians I like, like that retired teacher, mother of six, living in Tasmania who spent her life teaching English to aboriginals. C. M. , I <3 you

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  • Another fact about kangaroos, they rarely wear boxing gloves in the wild. lol

    I know what you mean though. People only hear about one part of a culture or country and start to think that the whole area is like that. I know some people here in the united states that think everyone in Oklahoma still lives in teepees.

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  • For a bit of context to all you non Aussies out there, read her seventh point again, but this time, remember that Australia had a thing called the White Australia Policy right up until the mid 70s.

    Yeah. Some of the things white Aussies get away with here will make even the most hardcore Republican Americans cringe.

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  • I heard that Australian team plays good cricket.. Is that true?

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    • Considering cricket is an Aussie sport and just as big as footy... yeah. I'm pretty sure we play good cricket. XD

  • not once did I hear about anything from giant spiders and I HATE spiders so still won't go there xD would though if none of those were around. and here spiders aren't big we only get the small ones.

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    • Heh, our spiders aren't giant. You just need to know the difference between a huntsman, and a funnel web. Oh and a white tail but those are pretty obvious. (and everyone knows to stay away from redbacks.)

      Heh, I'm not helping you much am I

      I'm not going to lie, we do have a hell of a lot of spiders, but depending on the area, you should be right for avoiding them. I've never been bitten by a spider and have a healthy respect for them. We used to have a shed out back that was home to spiders, and a bit of the playground at my primary school which was nicknamed spider heaven.
      There were kids bragging about holding a redback or whitetail in their hands. Stupid.

      But, really you should be right other than daddy long legs and huntsman. Both harmless.

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    • Heh, well good luck with that then.

      Can I be cruel? I feel like being cruel. Did you know there's a spider every... no. No I'm not that mean.

    • yeah yeah I know and it freaks me out :'(

  • Pretty good take overall...
    Have to agree with you mostly..
    Oz is unique- it's the worlds largest island, the only island continent, has some pretty unique animals the weirdest I find is the platypus constructed of left over parts.. beaver tail, clawed web feet, duck bill, furry body, lives in water and lays eggs.. only in Australia...
    Keep up the good work, you're really switched on for your age...

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    • Ouch... oh I feel bad for laughing now... You aren't a walking zombie are you? Surviving that you must be... ouch.

      ... ouch.

    • What doesn't kill us only makes us stronger...
      Like I tell my dau's " skin grows back!" I'd have little left if it didn't.. lol
      When you have to tolerate native animals on the property, it's just how it is, and you develop a healthy respect for them... Google kangaroo fighting and Emu fighting, Oh Casawarry fighting/ injuries received too...
      Anyway as a direct descendant of a ring leader of the Eureka Stockade, the family has been around for generations out here in the sticks and it's just part of life... Enjoy

  • I didn't know that people have stuck misconceptions but that's really good.

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  • I perpetuate all those ideas. It's funny to me.

    It does get way too hot for me though, 45 degrees is so not cool. :P

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  • " I mean seriously, my primary school can't celebrate Christmas anymore just because you think it's offensive? I think it's offensive that you're taking away our celebrations." Well said! People should be teaching tolerance of other cultures instead of banning anything that other cultures don't like!

    Interesting take as well :) Still seems like a fun place to visit :)

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    • Thankyou for reading!

      Another thing I could have put in point seven but only found out today, we can't carry our own flag around now because it offends some religion that originated somewhere that definitely wasn't here. Now there, is offensive and completely unfair.

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    • He is our current Prime Minister (is it sad I had to look it up to see if he was still current? ... yes.)
      He's about as useless as all our other prime ministers. Actually more so.

    • Sorry to hear that, most of our presidents are pretty useless as well, and don't even get me started on those idiots in Congress lol.

  • You can thank Steve Irwin and Crocodile Dundee for that stereotype.

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    • Oh wow, I forgot all about the crocodile stereotypes... I need to make another of these.
      And make sure people know it was Steve Irwin's own fault that the stingray got him. People seem to be blaming the wild animal for getting scared.

      I'm not one hundred percent sure which stereotype you're talking about, but whichever it is, you're probably right.

  • I kinda figured everything in Australia is pretty much like where I live only upside down. Jokes aside I didn't realize your country was getting stereotyped so hard.

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    • And then you even didn't even hear about an Australian kiss.
      Crazy, man!

  • I share your concern about what's happening to Australia and other Western countries when it comes to immigration. I hope your country and mine don't have to go through what's happening in Western European countries right now. But sadly I think we're both on the path to that same end. I do disagree with you, though, about the difference between dry heat and humid heat. I live in the American South, the part that is very humid in the summer. For me, it's much more uncomfortable to be outside when the temperature is 95 and the humid is 80%+ than to be in the desert Southwest where it's 95 and very dry air.

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    • Well, I'm not going to argue with you, I'm probably just used to humid heat rather than dry heat.

    • If you want to see the future of the U. S., always look towards Europe . Whatever happens there comes here in about ten years give or take

  • kangaroos. kangaroos everywhere!

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  • England, just a bit hotter.

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  • Australia and Brazil are the two countries I want to visit the most. One day, maybe even retire.

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  • Australia is amazing!

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  • I hear that Australia has the highest quality of life in the world but also some really attractive people. Like Miranda Kerr and Heath Ledger so yea I want to move there basically.

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What Girls Said 8

  • I gotta agree with your seventh point. It's terrible.

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    • Oh wow, people still look at this take? Heh.

      It is. It really is.
      Thankyou for reading!

    • Some muslims finds it offensive even if we wish each other (Christians) Merry Christmas! It's crazy.

      Saw your latest featured myTake and my curiosity struck upon ><

  • Islam is taking over Australia too? Here in Britain, we can't say Merry Christmas any more because Muslims find it offensive. We're a CHRISTIAN country with a soft government. The Christian school I went to, only accepted Christians and I had to go to church to get in, now half of the year are Muslims who wear hi-jabs. We weren't allowed to wear necklaces with the cross on, the uniform code was strict but they eventually allowed hi-jabs in fear of looking "racist" when it's not racist at all, it's sticking to the rules and our values. I think it's a kick to the teeth! How do they get their own way everywhere? Stuff like that angers me.

    Interesting take though. I must admit, I do believe some of those stereotypes. I didn't know Australia could be cold regularly. I thought it was mainly very hot there, but then again, if you're used to 35C heat, then anything considerably lower may make you think it's cold when it's usually colder here in Britain. Our Winter's seem to last 6 months haha! It's 14C right now with 17 mph winds (it's chilly but sunny) but people are sunbathing and out in their gardens. We make the most of any sun we get here! 14C is like Summer heat to us. We're used to like 3C weather here.
    Someone I knew years ago said they visited Australia and found a massive spider/scorpion in their shoe. That's enough not to make me want to visit, despite it being a beautiful country, but thanks for writing this.

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  • Great take. I thought Steve Irwin and crocodiles would be a good misconception too.

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    • Yeah, I actually forgot about a lot of misconceptions. But I'm going to make another to include the ones I missed.

  • Hey, good take Bailey... :)) yes there are lots of things to write about our home land... it is a unique island and has always been a very welcoming place we call home for all to visit here... and from out national anthem of waltzing matildas which I loved with the billabong now changed to advance Australia Fair... which I'm still getting used to LOL!!
    Unfortunately we do seem to be dictated to by what others want in our country and they are mainly from a specific type where as thIs government needs to stand up and just say NO!!
    by the way... the emu is just the classic... love it!! :)))

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  • When a former co-worker told me of her trip to Australia, that was when the stereotype I had about kangaroos was broken. Apparently, they like going all over the place. One of their aussie friends took them to a golf course at around 6am to see all these kangaroos litter this golf course. And according to my co-worker, they were mean!

    I'm really sorry about your 7th point. Western Europe also has the same problem but it's much worse over there, especially with North Africa and Middle East being so close to Europe . The US is also starting to have the same problem with them in certain places.

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  • I always though Australia was the country that contained all the scariest creatures and fire breathing koala bears.

    jk
    I want to visit their at some point

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  • I've heard amazing things about Australia but I do have one question. Are those huntsman spiders really everywhere? I've seen some people saying they are and others saying they aren't. Is it just certain regions?

    If I were driving and one of those came crawling onto me like people say they do, I am pretty certain I would die of a heart attack like 3 times over. Aaaahhh!!

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    • Aha, no they're not everywhere. I mean, I've seen more than I can count in my life, but they turn up in more comical places than just everywhere. I remember one used to live above the bathroom door, another crawled across the coffee table, stared at me a while then dissapeared, and another had my aunty pulling over and screaming like a banshee.

      Okay, so they pretty much are everywhere, but you won't see them everywhere all the time. Think of it this way though, a daddy long legs is more dangerous than a huntsman. Truth.

  • Don't know about all the stuff you mentioned but what I do i know is everyone I know who has been to Australia has experienced/witnessed some form of racism/bigotry. Go figure

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    • Yeah, from the outside most parts of Australia are very racist. But we love to joke and tease, and the more things different between you an me, the more things we'll tease you about. All in good fun of course. Just... avoid the places where it's not teasing and actual racism that will get out of hand... I can't tell you where those places are as I'm pretty sheltered, but just know they're there. And they're horrible.

    • glad you can at least recognize that. you sound like a good egg

    • Aww, I've never been called that before. I'm gonna store that away in my book of compliments.
      Thankyou.

      And yeah, I've never really been on of those kids who will refuse to think that the country I love could have anything bad in it. My home is like anyone else's, it has it's good places and people, and it's really shitty ones.

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