What do you guys identify at? Answer seriously below and follow the chart.
Me personally.. I identify as a...
-Polyamorous pan-sexual
-Cis-gender white male
-Part time trans-gender (MTF)
Also identify as a 6 year old misogynistic attack helicopter from time to time. I like the thought of being sexually Identified as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting evil individuals. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I’m fkin retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “Apache” and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can’t accept me you’re a heliophobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
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JK... Jakes on you. I identify as a mailbox. I'm beautiful for who I am.. a mailbox.
I sexually Identify as an the sun. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of slamming hydrogen isotopes into each other to make helium & light and send it through the galaxy. People say to me that a person being a star is Impossible and I’m fucking retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon inflate me with hydrogen and raise my temperature to over 6000 °C. From now on I want you guys to call me “Sol” and respect my right to give you vitamin D and probably sunburns. If you can’t accept me you’re a fusionphobe and need to check your astral privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
I identify as a toucan, you may recognize the character "Toucan Sam" from the Froot Loops commercials, that is my father. "Senor Toucan" from the show, "Dora the Explorer" triggers me. The stereotype for mexican toucans should be abolished. Toucans have faced enough oppression, and saying the word "senor toucan" is also racist because he HAS a name. It is Bill.
We should rally for attack helicopter bathrooms. It's outrageous that white cis men can have their own bathroom, but attack helicopters don't. I identify as a white male (unfortunately), but I support all you gender fluid people.
I identify as a goddess and my pronouns are "your majesty" or "I'm not worthy". And if you say otherwise you're a deiphobe who... congrats just triggered me to death.
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