I really like this guy, he is not at all like my previous boyfriends. He wants to be in a relationship with me but for some reason I feel like I can... Show More
Most Helpful Guy
This makes me chuckle a little. I can recall from my own experience a time when I could have fit that description of being kind of ugly. What were the problems? Bad haircut, indifferent to clothing styles, and not hitting the gym. And I recall being treated poorly by the ladies, with the exception of a couple of girls who were dating my friends.(Not surprisingly they ended up marrying those same friends.)
Down the road I felt motivated, got a better haircut, picked up some more stylish threads, and thew on about 15 lbs. of muscle. Naturally women started treating me a lot better. I wasn't a more valuable or better person, but I guess I looked that way to women.
And that's why it makes me chuckle. Unless this guy is suffering from some serious bone alignment deformities, the difference between how he looks now and how he'd look if he was devoted to looking his best could be substantial.
Despite the buzz that opposites attract, the truth is that like attracts like. People match up best, and most often, in relationships where appearance, intelligence, values, education, and interests align.
What's happening with you is that some portion of those similarities is there, whether it be beliefs, intelligence, values, interests, or something else, but those things are all of a lesser value in your mind than his appearance. As for the benefits, well, that's a tough one to provide because the things he might provide - stability, love, concern, etc. don't seem to be as important to you (or your "friends") as the appearance. Given that you'll probably feel more comfortable dating someone else.