My boyfriend broke up with me after 2 years? I'm so sad, help me

I know its long but please read...

He broke up with me 2 days ago, after a 2 year relationship, because we were always fighting about his commitment to having a girlfriend. He didn't really put me first ever, I was his first serious girlfriend and he was my 3rd serious boyfriend..

Except he is the only one I have been in love with. I love him so much I feel like I can't live without him. It wasn't an angry break up, he told me he still loves me so much but he can't be what I want. He said he can seriously see himself marrying me but he wishes he had met me later. I know he doesn't know what true love is because he doesn't have anyone to compare me to.

Its new years eve tonight (in australia it is anyway.. not sure about you guys) and I'm scared he will fall into someone elses arms, I have been told he is shattered over this.

We broke up once before and he came back. So I know they come back but do they come back a second time? I feel like he will stick to it this time even though he misses me. He said he will, do people say these things and go back on them?

Im so sad I just don't know what to do.

How can I get him back and if I can't then how do I move on when we live 5 minutes from each other and always see each other out.

We are both 20 years old by the way.



Most Helpful Guy

  • I was in a similar situation as you, We were together for 3 years then she came back, now she left again. Its really hard and I don't know what to tell you. What I told myself is that you know what if you are meant for each other you'll find each other again, if not then this is the best thing that could happen although it doesn't feel that way. You have to be careful and not be the girl who will be there when he is done dating around, it de-values you. YOu just have to go out there and try to move on and the best way to do that is try new guys. YOu might see there is something better out there. Or at least he will see you with another guy and that might knock his head, that you are wanted out there and if he wants you, he better come back because some other guy is in his place. I was in the same situation as you are, I wanted to marry my ex, but know we broke up had some time apart, I met another girl, that I have a huge crush on whom I'm trying to persue and she makes me smile, makes me happy and makes me feel things that I never felt with my ex. This might be the best thing just take advantage and if you guys are meant to be you will get together again. Feel free to talk to me or ask questions. Happy new year.


What Guys Said 10

  • Get your friends. Take a month or two. Hug it out, talk it out, cry it out. Then bury this relationship. Totally. And NO CONTACT with your ex. At all. Of any kind. Not even to explain why.

    Then, start dating. You don't have to get into a relationship, but you have to get used to being treated right by guys who like you.

    IF he comes back--and odds are, he won't--make him sweat a while, and wait a while and make sure he's committed to making the relationship work. Don't let him repeat his behavior.

  • You can live without him. Life will go on. If he falls into someone else arms, it wasn't meant to be. The past will not dictate the future so you don't know if he'll come back. You can never "get him back". He has to want to come back. You don't want him back if he doesn't want to go back.

    Hang out with your friends. One day it will stop hurting a little less than it did before. That's healing. Don't sit around all day checking his myspace or facebook or twitter. There's a whole world out there. Go live it.

  • I say all you can do is see what he does. Either he'll realize he cares enough to make you a higher priority, or...well the important thing is this was a 2-yr relationship; I really doubt he's gonna fall into someone else's arms so quick.

    "Just wait" is horrible advice! I know that. I guess my advice is this: it's New Year's Eve there, just go have fun tonight. He'll be thinking about nothing but you tonight, and with it being New Years he's even likelier to get all emotional and decide he'll do what it takes.

    As for what to do if you have to move on, and live 5 minutes apart (that sucks!)... don't worry about it for now. If that happens, post another question asking what to do, and we'll give you incredible answers.

  • You're in a world of pain and confusion now, but remember that your pain won't last. You will recover.

    Only he knows if he'll come back.

    But for your sake, stay away from him. Don't call. Don't email. If you live close to him, that doesn't mean you'll see him. You can still avoid his street as much as possible.

    No contact will help you recover.

  • PS... new years still sucks balls.

    the end.

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What Girls Said 9

  • I'm so sorry you guys broke up, but it's for the best. He made the right decision. Since he made it clear that he does not want a committment it is time for you to move on. You are so young and have yet to begin your lives. You should move on and I know given the proximity of your homes it may be difficult.

    He cares about you a lot, at least he didn't lead you on and make you think you would have something when he knows he's not ready. Your ex-Boyfriend is not mature enough to commit and doesn't want to mess you over. You should be proud that he cares about your well being.

    Now be a strong woman and let it go. It's part of becoming a woman and it's better that he treated you well so that you can recognize it the next time you see it. It would be bad if you had a series of guys that just cheated on you and strung you along developing a pattern of maltreatment. Thank him and move on.

    1. Go out with your girlfriends and meet some new friends.

    2. Go to some new places that don't remind you of him.

    3. It's a new year, so make a resolution to move on. In about 7 years you can begin to take him seriously if he wants you back.

    4. Become friends after you both get over each other. If not someone runs the risk of getting messed over. It seems like you may be the person getting messed over since he broke up with you for your benefit.

    Good Luck Happy New Year.

  • okay.. this is very hard.

    do you believe what he said..? that he'll come back to you?

    similar thing happened to me except he was my first bf.. and we only dated for 5 month but it meant everything.. he said he'll come back to me when I'm 18 but I don't believe that.. during a year.. there's millions of things that could happen.

    if he really meant what he said then the only person that can decide on what to do is you.. follow your heart.. ask yourself, do you want to wait for him to come back to you..? do you want to get him back..?

    if your answer is yes to both of the questions then.. hun I support you! Us girls.. we need to believe in ourselves that we can do this :)

    If seeing him hurts you that much.. why don't you try to be JUST friends with him..? you'll find that you two can be more comfortable around eachother.. try it.. its a great way to start again.. trust me on this.. you'll find that he tells you more about his feelings and maybe you can find out how he feels towards you ^.^

    I hope I helped you :)


    xoxo ella

  • if it's true love,

    then he will come back.

    he might find someone else,

    it might take awhile,

    but if it's true love, he'll discover that.

    and it will work out.

    and if it doesn't work out, then you'll know it wasnt meant to be.

    you'll find your prince charming, whether it's him or not. (:

  • I think that you are right he is not ready for a serious relationship and maybe him dating a few other girls then he will realize what he lost and realize what a mistake he made,... give him time.,... but don;t be at his beckon call every time he wants to talk.

  • dont let him see it hurts cause then he feel like this can be aregular thing when he wants to take a break. let him see what he's missing. and if it meant to be 2nd time will happen

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