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How my exes made me become a good girl gone bad

How my exes made me become a good girl gone bad

I used to believe in love.

I used to believe in happy endings.

All l ever given them was love.

I did the best I can, given everything, yet still not enough.

Now, I don't believe in love.

In fact, I think love is stupid.

Now, I'm only after sex.

I'm so desperate that I'm willing take any love I can receive even if I know sex doesn't really count as love.

Am I not girlfriend material?

What's wrong with me?

I got nobody to talk to.

I want to be a bitch. Sleep with guys and feel nothing at all. Be numb. So I can't feel the pain anymore.

But who am I kidding?

I'm still the good girl inside and no matter how I pretend to be strong, I'm still hurting.

Should I be wild and make all the things that I know are mistakes? That I know I'll regret? Just so that they can say that "I pity her" "I wish I never left her" "She used to be a good girl" "What happened to her" "How did she become a bitch".

I know they wouldn't care less.

Ever broken a girl's heart and regretted it because you saw what she has become because of you?

How my exes made me become a good girl gone bad
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  • Anonymous

    Damn I know a few girls that have this same mindset. And I hate it, but I understand it. I mean people who judge with one speed mindsets don't realize matters of the heart aren't black and white, or cut and dry or 1 dimensional.

    There is no rulebook telling you how to cope or understand why you feel the way you feel. Why this person you love hurt you, or betrayed you, or didn't respect you enough to end things amicably or whatever.

    sure you have people close to you, friends or family trying there best to share THEIR own experiences or co-workers and other people on the outside, giving you their how to tips on how to get over him, or how to move on from him or her... but... does it happen the way it happened for them... NO.

    Does it happen in the timeframe they think it should... NO

    Does it mean if you follow their advice you're gonna retain the same views, values or personality you once had before goin into a relationship... NO.

    People need to understand that people have flaws, and make mistakes. Yes even sexual ones. Like I know it should be sacred and valued more highly than casual flings, or revenge or whatever.. but people have pain that they do NOT know how to deal with at times and things like what happened to you happen.

    I'm sorry you find yourself wanting to go this route though mate. I do hope true love finds you before you completely give up on it though :).

    Is this still revelant?

What Girls & Guys Said

2382
  • TheFlak38

    Think of all the good guys you friend-zoned in favour of the bad boys that abused you. Women love to be abused.

  • the_mad_tinkerer

    Are you absolutely positive that you aren't falling into a self fufilling prophesy?

  • silvermoon84

    Nope. I will not shut up 🖕🏻🖕🏻🖕🏻🖕🏻 and the only failure in this discussion is you.

  • Robertcw

    Ah man. I think I have done something like this.

    I haven't done it since. Somewhat traumatizing.

  • Bmp55

    Yes I have I wish the answer was no but yes . I lost the only women I have ever loved. There is not a day that I don't regret it , but I got to put ownership of what she or you are doing No one can change how you are living but you . You have a good heart , I'm sorry that your got your heart broke , believe me I hate it. I can really relate to your situation. But using sex to numb the pain is not the way to deal with it. You have self worth , there is not another you , you are one of a kind. Be proud of who you are. Dont turn away from the pain , face it and take one step at a time and walk through it , ask God to take your hand and lead, you through all the pain and mess. You will be afar better person for it. We all lose our way from time to time Its not wrong for you feeling like you do but you got to go through the pain And I feel that If God put you to together then you will always be together.
    Nothing to it just do it
    Godspeed

  • I can relate to a few things on that list. My x's cheated and I became a MGTOW Monk right where I've been for 33 years.

    • Badballie

      Sorry to hear that, but it is good you have made the decision for yourself. Keep going, I am afraid I love having sex. But it cost a hell of a lot of money, but over time the sex gets less. Women can be very toxic. I believe the cliche "behind every successful man there is a woman". Nevertheless, men who have wives have forfeited their independence and authority. The nagging of a woman is like a leaking roof. They all nag, it drives me insane. Wives are supposed to be a helper equal as a human being. Different from MEN I really would never have babies as a woman, just more baggage that makes the marriage much more difficult to work.

    • @Badballie You definitely have a good point. However at my age children are more important to me than a relationship. I don't want to be entirely alone the rest of my life and I don't want to be in a relation with the state either. And that's what women are today a relationship with the state. You pick the woman and the state controls everything about you from that point on.

    • Badballie

      Children come and go all five of my mine are in the UK or New Zealand. But my wife stays.

  • rachaa

    Please stay a good girl. know ur worth. nobodys attention defines u!

  • CasaNorba

    so did all of your exes held you at gun point and force you to go bad?

  • You can treat yourself as a sexual object only and you know that such girls never actually get anything not even respect.

    I had my heart broken before so i decided to give 200% and get my degree and a good job and i did, i felt like sh*t for so long esepcially after meeting so many girls and seeing how many bs they throw at men whether they mean it or not, but i didn't ruin my life i decided to fix it and turn it around to show everyone that iam as valueable as i believe i am.

    You are responsible for your own life if a guy decided he doesn't wanna be part of if then fine, dont ruin it cause once you go there its over and you lose.

  • taleswapper

    Ah, yes.. Blame someone else for your feelings; that always effective.

    Here's the thing. THEY didn't make you into a "bad girl"; you did. More to the point, your whole idea of "good girl" and "bad girl" are INTERNAL! YOU are the one who condemns yourself. You're the one who makes you feel bad, makes you want to be a bitch, makes you trade sex for the illusion of love that you don't even believe in any more.

    Stop giving "them" power over you. Accept that these things come from within you, not from them. That is the very first step in getting over past mistakes.

    And decouple sex from love. You can have love without sex, and enjoy sex without love. They're not related, except in your mind. You're beating YOURSELF up over this.

  • SongBird3

    Nobody made you this way! You made yourself this way

  • Sanguboy

    Its not your eyes its your mind who thinks bad or good and make u like that 😊

  • ThatDude29

    I felt so sad reading this, but I understand. Don't know what to say but I teared :')

  • Clarke498

    Nope, never broken a girl's heart. Never been with one close enough to do so...

  • jdawg01

    Honestly I've been through some pretty rough stuff my self but i know a lot of girls that went down that route and they are miserable as hell with everything in life don't degrade yourself over some one that didn't see your worth love does exist but i know your like b. s no not really love isn't something you choose when too come or go it comes when its the right person be strong and stay whole some losing your self and degradating your self will change absolutely nothing at all it sucks i know but trust me once you find the right person they are gonna make you happy as hell

  • Others are not responsible for your own behaviour.

  • Yessir12

    It’s sad you gave up on love.

  • Cocaine is a hell of a drug.

  • Be a bad girl!!!

  • DDpsy

    r/nicegirls

  • You were never a good girl

  • ChiPaPa

    bollocks

  • valentine74

    Drop dead you whore

  • Nikkiyogi79

    Old relationship shape us.

  • Twenty2

    People need to go back to classic culture

  • Fuentes

    Just excuses on how to be a sl*t

  • lukas23456

    None

  • Jmmmfi4

    Can I have your number?

    • Anonymous

      seriously? haha

    • Jmmmfi4

      Heeeeeeeeeeell yeah

    • Anonymous

      can't send you a message... can't post my number here. haha.

    • Show All
  • richhandsomeguy

    What's wrong with sleeping with guys lol

  • Anonymous

    Nobody can make you do anything. You chose to become this person plain and simple and you're using past experiences to alleviate you from any responsibilty for your actions.
    You think you're the first person to habe strong feelings for someone and them not retuen it? Welcome to real life.
    If you're as loving as you say you are then i'd guess you're dating outside your league. Because guys don't do that to women unless they know they can do better.

  • Anonymous

    Why dont they have a dislike button for mytakes?

  • Anonymous

    Let it go and let God. He loves you more than you know.

    I used to seek sexual validation from men but now I feel complete in God’s love. You can change.

  • Anonymous

    Stop being a weak ass bitch. Your exes didn’t MAKE you do anything. Your exes don’t control your identity. You do. Everybody on this planet has been hurt by somebody, but if you decide to change your whole personality just cause some fuckboy treated you badly, then you’re giving him all the power, and he probably doesn’t even care that he hurt you. I get that it hurts and you don’t want to feel hurt ever again, but life is long and you’re going to be hurt over and over again no matter what you do. So why not be a good person, experience love, and accept the hurt with grace so you can move from it. Don’t let the hurt fester inside you and rot your personality. The only way to truly make your exes feel regret is for you to stay strong, stay positive, work on yourself and make yourself better and happier, and find love elsewhere. You’ll be too good for them. If you just become a “bad girl” and start sleeping with everyone they’ll just call you a whore. Don’t give them the power. If you really want to knock them down a peg then DON’T GIVE THEM THE POWER.

  • Anonymous

    Women like you are the ones that push men away with your drama and clingyness, then you sit there blaming us for your toxicity becasue somehow you've rationalized it as love...

  • Anonymous

    wow maybe this is why noone likes you? you say you give others love but when one truly loves they expect nothing in return. yet you're selfish. you're selfish and expect people to love you and care for you.
    do you have any idea how hard some people try to keep people around them? obviously not. maybe try harder.

    and to answer the question in the end. it is the girl's own fault for being so weak. numbest people are the weakest ones. so technically you're weak. and whiny. and needy. selfish. all those things come to mind. so in the end its your fault.

  • Anonymous

    I don't feel sorry for you at all. You're blaming others for your own poor choices.

  • Anonymous

    Excuses, excuses, excuses

  • Anonymous

    Miley Cyrus is that you?

    • Anonymous

      yes it's miley in the pic.. the perfect example. I watched hannah montana.. i don't know who turned her into a wild one. I don't know why she suddenly changed.

    • Anonymous

      After she broke up with Liam for the first time she kinda took the wrong turn. after they got together again she started to act normal, now that they split again she seems like she's following the same pattern as the first time, which is totally wrong you can't associate your goodness, identity, and how you behave upon someone else, people come and go what stays is your true self that you shouldn't lose it for anyone. And honestly the worst thing you can do is blame people or circumstances for how you turn out as a person, many people go through hell but still remain good in the inside and don't blame others.

      I honestly wish you the very best and sincerely hope you can find yourself and never lose it no matter what.

    • Anonymous

      thanks so much! that means a lot

  • Anonymous

    My first love was horrible, after we broke up I almost committed suicide, and I get panick attacks when I see her because of the trauma she gave me, yet I don’t find myself being a jerk to other girls, and I am willing to love someone else, someone better, but you need to find your strength. I also wanted to be numb and never love again, but you need to be strong, because someone that goes through pain and still able to find a way to love, is a strong person hang in there, because I did and you can too.

  • Anonymous

    You sound like an immature thot.

  • Anonymous

    Wow a typical women going for bad boys then crying all men are same. See one girl told me abusive things and left , and I had saved her life once. You were still on a relationship , I got abuse from saving someone.

  • Anonymous

    get in line hun
    get in line

    you are not the only one

  • Anonymous

    Thanks for telling us how a girl becomes a slut.
    Bitterness leads to promiscuity.

  • Anonymous

    You came here looking for sympathy and there were enough women and simps here to give it to you. Now it’s time for a real man to give you a good strong dose of honesty. You don’t deserve any sympathy. There were probably good guys standing on the sideline waiting for you to give them the time of day but of course you didn’t because you were too busy dating jerk offs. Your fault lady, and you deserve to be left alone because now your feelings of inadequacy and not being good enough (which you aren’t by the way) are payback for bitch shielding. We don’t want you thots anymore. Bye.

    • You aren't very different than her, you both used your experiences an excuse to be a miserable human beings.

    • "Real men" don't spout their bitterness to anyone who'll listen... how does what you just said make you any less of a simp?

    • @Carefuloutthere And he's coward enough to keep anonymous.

    • Show All
  • Anonymous

    Same. I've had too many bad experiences, been too trusting and too hopeful and believed in love too naively. Would hardly say i've "gone wild" though as I am still introverted but I do have men in the friendzone and I just don't care if someone tries to be romantic, give me flowers etc. It's like it's empty inside I just feel neutral regardless of what any man does for me now, if anything I feel annoyed an that he's a dumb fool who thinks love is real. Turned into a bitch definietely but that's life I guess

    • Curmudgeon

      "... but I do have men in the friendzone and I just don't care if someone tries to be romantic, give me flowers etc. It's like it's empty inside I just feel neutral regardless of what any man does for me now, if anything I feel annoyed an that he's a dumb fool who thinks love is real..."

      All of you who hang out in the friendzone hoping she will change her mind, take note.

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