So far with both exes I've had, we tried to be friends and it just went up in flames. Definitely didn't work at all. I always thought I could be friends with exes... but it's soooo hard.
So are you friends with any of your exes?
- My ex (or one of them) and I are BFFsVote A
- My ex (or one of them) and I are friendsVote B
- We tried to be friends but it failed miserablyVote C
- We never tried to be friends. I just dropped all contact with them.Vote D
- I haven't broken up with anyone yet. Still with my SO. So I don't have an exVote E
- I haven't dated anyone. So I don't have an ex.Vote F
Most Helpful Guy
There are two primary problems with maintaining contact:
1. The dumpee will have some hope of reconciling the relationship and will agree to remain friends just to keep the lines of communication open. However, when the dumpor starts indicating that they have found someone new, the dumpee will become jealous and potentially disruptive.
2. When the dumpor starts dating, the dumpor's new partner will say, "Hey, WTF is up with you hanging on to your ex? Are you still in love with him/her?"2
Most Helpful Girl
I am really good friends with my ex and have a good relationship with him and his wife. Just the other day, I spoke with his wife on the telephone for a good hour or so and it was about personal stuff.
I tend to talk to her more than him if I am asking them both a question (like want to get together, are you guys going to so-so's party, etc) since I feel like that is more respectful to their relationship.
I call him if I have specific question for him (car questions, birthday wishes, etc).
But I have known my ex for over twenty years and I know his wife too since we are work colleagues and I would say his wife is now my friend too.
We socialize together, we talk on the phone and they have even stayed the weekend with my boyfriend and me.
It is doable as long as both parties are respectful of each other's new partners and do not harbor any ill feelings or unresolved romantic feelings.
My ex is one of the best men I have met in my life and he is very dear to me and I will always love him and want him in my life as my friend.