Ex boyfriend moved away about a week ago.

my ex boyfriend moved away about a week ago. we have been broken up for maybe 2 or 3 weeks now. and all this is so hard on me. he tells me we can talk and still keep in touch but yet, he doesn't call or talk to be for like 6 days, until I message him on Facebook. I hate being the first person to talk to him but whatever. so I messaged him again cause I completely broke down the other day and this is what I said:

i shouldn't be doing this. but I'm just letting you know I'm a complete f***ing mess right now.

i can't even go out cause I can't stop crying. I haven't cried in like a f***ing week either.

everything I do and everything I see reminds me of you. I can't take this.

i love you so f***ing much even though I shouldn't because I know you're probably hooking up with some chick right now.

this isn't fair. I really wish you didn't go, or you would come back or something.

i miss you. I miss cuddling with you and kissing you. and your hugs. and all the things we used to do together.

i just can't deal with this. and it sucks. and the worst part is, if you really truly did love me, you wouldn't have left. you would have at least tried to make this work with me, or at least waited for me.

i can't f***ing do this. I want you to come back :[ I wanna be yours :[[[[

and this is what he said back:

you are mine I still miss you I feel the same way but I can wait for you to be done with school, and I still want you to come visit I miss you I don't get on here much cause I'm busy

that doesn't seem too sincere to me. and like honestly if he cared he would call me (its a big deal because he doesn't have a phone right now)

i just don't know how to take this.

when I first messaged him he told me he's been busy catching up with old friends and he got a bike and stuff and he hasn't even slept in his own bed. like how the hell am I suppose to take that?

what do I do about all this?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Okay is this is gonna sound counter productive, however, you wanna show him that you are a strong and confident person, that is sexy by the way. You can get anyone you want, but you choose him. Come on look at you :) But you reaching out to him you are basically telling him that you are thinking of him and when you remind him that you are a mess, you are basically saying that you are not strong and confident.

    I want you to keep yourself busy and think of how you are gonna move on from this. You are a queen and you deserve better. Know that!

    When a guy breaks up with a girl, he gave it thought. Believe it or not he was ready for the break up before he left you. You wanna know the best thing to do right now? No Contact! No contact gives you the dumpee time to reflect and not make the situation worse for yourself by reaching out to him (I will bet you that although it seems like a good idea at the time, you feel worse when you do reach out and don't get the reaction you wanted). Let this guy miss you. Dissappear on him. When you do this, we wonder why she isn't calling me and telling me she misses me? What could she be doing? Is she thinking of me? When you disappear you get in our heads and that is how we miss you. Who knows by the time he comes around, you might not want him anymore and have already moved on for real.

    Please be selfish when it comes to your ex. It's all about you now. You are all that matters. Take care of you and do thinks that make YOU happy. He isn't reaching out to you because he is "busy", well so are you pretty girl.

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    • Yeah I know I need to do that . but its wayyy easier said then done. and he messaged me back saying why do you say that but just cause we are broke up doesn't mean your not mine and I'm not yours I still love you and miss you a lot and still want you to come down.

      that doesn't make sense to me. either he wants all of me, or nothing to do with me at all. I'm sick of the games and stuff. and going to see him would be the dumbest thing I could ever do. right?

    • Sweetie it all takes time. I know, easier said then done.

      I think that regardless of anything he says, he still isn't making the time for you. Why won't he come down to see you? Why do you have to do all the work?

      Don't wait for something that isn't promised. You said it yourself, all or nothing. So now that he is gone, you have nothing. You have your answer from him, even if he didn't say it.

    • I know. its just hard accepting the fact that he's gone. and I'm still in love with him. and the fact that he couldn't wait 7 more months, just so we can be together and that we can live in the same state, if you love someone you would do anything for them. so obviously he never loved me..

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 4

  • Yeah, you need to cut off all contact with him. I split with my ex 2 and a half months ago and have pretty much had no contact with her at all. If you think your situation is bad, my ex is already engaged to someone else :)

    It hurt like hell when we broke up and even more so when I found this out a couple of weeks ago but I can tell you now that I'm feeling much better.

    Sometimes you need to know that the other person has moved on and is hooking up with other people so that you can hit that rock bottom and find your way back up again.

    I obviously still think of my ex everyday but after 2 months of no contact I can tell you that that was the single most important factor of me moving on.

    It will suck for at least a month but it will do you all the good in the world for the future.

    If your both meant to be together then time apart won't matter. I hope this makes sense but if you want to have any kind of relationship with him in the future then you need to get over this past relationship. And I don't mean just have the hope that things will work out, I mean you need to really get over him!

    Deleted all his messages, numbers and anything that can and will remind you of him. If he wants to contact you then he will.

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  • Welcome to LDR, the bane of all relationships. Guys that are distant in LDR's suggest that maybe they're looking for someone else. They may be really busy. Also, they maybe separating themselves because of the pain. Sometimes from each side, there is this constant fear of one sleeping with another person. They left, and that's a fact that many have to come to terms too. This doesn't mean the relationship is over, but it means you must keep perspectives in mind. Good luck.

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  • That reply is on par up there with the biggest loads of hogwash that I have ever seen.

    It is likely he is pulling the nice poker face on you to guarantee that he has another female to go back to for his own satisfaction if whatever he is up to at the moment fails. Do yourself and other just-as-equally-competent guys out there and just sever the tie. The last thing you want happening is for him to somehow snake his way back into your life, and have your ego broken once again because he pulls the same bag of, "I can't do this now" riff-raff on you.

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  • Yeah, you guys shouldn't be friends right now. You're obviously still emotionally attached and he's moving/moved on. All you're doing is torturing yourself. Get out and do things, and try to eliminate all the things you have that remind you of him. You just have to get him out of your head so you can start to get back to being the normal you. It's tough, but it can be done. :(

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What Girls Said 1

  • ok...girl my situation is pretty much same...i also broke up with my ex few weeks ago...he totally removed me..it still hurts like hell.i also think what you should do is stop all contacts with him.which I also did...whether it is damn hard...let him go girl...with in a month or so everything will turn around your way ...,

    if you do this he will definitly come to u...you and even I feel so sad, because they ignor us in big time...so if you do the same to him,it is pretty much sure he`ll change his mind.its not that easy to remove a past from anyones memory..so stop been sad..i no its not easy...but if you want him back you have to do it...gud luck

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