Am I Considered a Fickle Pickle in this Relationship?

[Paris13]

**My Fiance (Not sure I should Call him this now) Took a Break (Not even sure If IT Wasn't just a Break-up instead) For I had just Moved Nearly a Month ago to a Lovely place On My Own. I share this Place with Two other people but Not an EX (Bestie Friend) who is just a Part of my Family For Years and also a Biz partner. I now have More Freedom and Space and Feel Happier now. I can also get back into My Second book I am Writing. However, For Three years I have Been in a Long Distance Relationship with Alistyr from Gag (Not here anymore) and We became Engaged. Rings, etc. I became Part of His Family as well. We exchange Gifts, etc. I realize (Not judging neither) Many of You Frown on a LDR but it was Everything Beautiful to Us and We have/Had made it Work. I became a Bit of a problem in My Own Right with some Things and It Caused friction. And of Course, He Has/Had his own Flaws. But we still Love One another very much. Trouble Is, I am Not SURE anymore I wish to get Married and Be his Wife. Even now to Wear his Ring, Which I put Aside for Now. I don't Want to Keep going Back and Forth to Cause Him anymore pain and Anguish and Confusion. I need Advice from my Friends Here on How to Proceed now? Any Input Is Greatly Appreciated. Thank You, Friends. xx

Go slow with just Friendship and see where it Goes, Paris!

Be his Friend Only, Paris!

You don't seem like you Want a Relationship, Paris!

Don't get back INTO a Relationship until you are Sure, Paris!

Look down Here, Paris!

Updates

1 y

***The ONE THING I am SURE OF I want Him in My Life. xx

Updates

1 y

***Thank YOU so Much, Everyone!!! I gave Him a Helpful HINT (S) and Knowing he KNOWS ME as Well as He Does... he is Going Slow now and Backing Down some. He was Trying Too hard to Move too Fast Track Back Onto Our Fast Memory Lane from... Yesterday. xxoo

[White_Widow]

I think you came to a point/realization where you are finding out that it isn't becoming the "relationship" you hoped it would be.

Now you need to find out whether you can come to terms with this being as it is or come to terms that it sort of ends here.

If someone would say to me "I'm not sure if I still want to get married" no matter the reason, it literally points out that the relationship isn't how it's supposed to be. Marriage should be with a thought of growing old together, out of love and friendship. You both need to fight for it and most beautifully, if the relationship is how its supposed to be you both fight for almost effortlessly because of that love and friendship. Because you both want the same, to see the other person happy, to both become better people because you have each other to lean upon, to support each other, to love one another.

I understand it's hard and none of us can make any decisions for you. But I don't think this is the relationship that will keep making you happy long term. And you do deserve to be happy.

Either way, good luck Paris with whatever you decide to do.

[Paris13]

Thank You, sweetheart. This surely helped. xxoo

[White_Widow]

You're very welcome Paris, glad it helped. Xxx

[loveslongnails]

If the "legal" aspect of marriage is what bothers you, that's one thing, but that's not really the question unless that's the ONLY thing that bothers you. Marriage, without the legal or religious aspects, is essentially a mutually agreed upon commitment of your own design. Do you agree?

When I hear you say " ... Trouble Is, I am Not SURE anymore I wish to get Married and Be his Wife ( ... but we still Love One another very much). it makes me ask "what are you UNSURE of if you're SURE you love him?" A formalized commitment? Being "relegated to wife"?

When you say "I'm sure... I want him in my life...", etc., that sounds to me like you're as afraid to picture life without him as you are with him. While this is happening with you, what does HE want? How does HE want to proceed?

[Paris13]

I think MORE than I DO, @loveslongnails. This Makes Sense. xx

[loveslongnails]

I'm glad the possible explanation makes sense, but what are you going to choose to do?

[Paris13]

Go slow for now... Take back Some of My Life. xx

[OlderAndWiser]

I am confused. Is your recent move the problem? Or are you just at a point of questioning the strength of your feelings?

[Paris13]

I think... xx

[pizzalovershouse]

You already feel peace so time to say were over give ring back dont let your heart hurt just do it an know its been a long time coming an you both just grew apart no ones fault we all grow but some times we are not on same page as the one we love it hurts to break up I know been there had a ex that couldn't grow an couldn't meet m half way it was my way even when they were wrong an there is proof your right so I stuck it out to ling so I learnt to break it off to Late

[Paris13]

I took OFF the Ring for No wand Need Time. xx

[pizzalovershouse]

Yah but it's not good to let your heart keep in pain

[Surely]

My first question would be. Why do you feel so much more relaxed and free in your new place? Are your roommates male or female?
Why didn’t you move in with your fiancé. Since it has been three years plus you are engaged and wanting to spend your life with this guy.

How far apart is this LDR?
I get the feeling that you two are not the compatible couple that you would like to be.
Good luck, Paris!

[Paris13]

@Surely He lives in The UK and was from Gag. We met on Here. It was Going very Nicely but I could BE a problem at Times and Of course, No one is Perfect. Not Him neither. We made it work. However, I no wHave More Freedom than Before. I used to Live with another EX (KNown him for Years) for years, Helping Him Out with Our Business and so forth but He now is Traveling in different States in a New Job. I am On mY own Now in a Lovely Home with Tow male roomies. I moved from one county to another and am happy. I just wished to Take back my own Life now. xx

[Paris13]

@Surely Following you. lol!!! xxoo

[Sixgunsound]

What is your deep desire telling you? Is it romantic or platonic? You say you want him in your life, despite no longer having feelings of a romantic nature for him. I think you’ve answered your own question.

[Paris13]

I am Still in the Comfort Zone though. xx

[AviatorTom]

You're questioning the relationship, so you need to decide if you want a relationship, and if so, what kind. I can't tell you what to do... only your can decide that.

[Paris13]

I see H e s Trying Hard as even Now to Get back as One. xx

[humanearth]

Stay single for a spell, and break off all ties to him till your pain heals.

Once the the pain is gone and if you want to reconnect with him. So be it. At least now you have clear head to make sensable decisions when it comes to him

[Paris13]

@humanearth I have Disappeared for Now:((xx

[Jamie05rhs]

TALK about your issues. Don't just brush them aside or sweep them under the rug. Get to the root of the problem. He honest with each other. See if you can work it out.

[Paris13]

I know He doesn't Quite Trust me with My Feelings. xx

[Jamie05rhs]

@Paris13 What do you mean?

[Paris13]

Like Now... Ghosting. I am Doing... xx

[Jamie05rhs]

@Paris13 😱. You're ghosting him right now?

[Paris13]

I replied to his Sexy Message and then LATEEEEE Last Night when He was asleep:((xx

[Jamie05rhs]

@Paris13 What do you mean, "sexy" message? Haha

If you guys are having problems in your relationship, he should be addressing the problems. Not diverting with sexual things.
... Unless he thinks that will get your attention? Does that appeal to you?

[Massageman]

Just a shot in the dark here, but maybe you would want to ask HIM his take on what you just posed to US. :- )

[Paris13]

I have Begun... xx

[Likes2drive]

That’s why LDR is a very tough and so are relationships but if you have a lot of doubts then maybe you shouldn’t get involved

[Paris13]

If you Recall, Big Guy, I did Marry a Muslim back in Egypt where I once Resided for awhile. But I ended up Coming home and Broke it off. I met a Coptic Christian then. lol!!! Yes, It can be Tough. xx

[Likes2drive]

Yeah especially when they are from another country since relationships are tough already. Maybe you need a break

[Paris13]

I am Taking One by us Both doing Our own Space... My Choice. It IS Tough with This One, His Mum is Still Alive and He Takes care of Her right now and i don't Wish to Move there someday just Visit and He don't Really wish to Live here. lol!!! xx

[Likes2drive]

Yeah that’s the problem, someone has to move to the other

[Paris13]

... Or Visit. xx

[FunkyMonkee]

Well, if you know what you want, that's not fickle, is it?

[Paris13]

Is Ghosting This? xx

[FunkyMonkee]

Ghosting what? This question? This response?

[Andres77]

Take the long view…

in 5 years, what will you have wished you’d done?

[Paris13]

Thank YOU, @Andres77 xx

[Guardian45]

It's GREAT that you made a LDR, but DON'T RUSH THINGS. Be sure you want this to be some kind if permanent committed bond to one another. GO SLOW!

[Paris13]

I will Now. xx

[Jerre]

I voted A. Just see where it goes

[Jerre]

@Paris13 Thank you for the Like

[Paris13]

Thank You, @jerre For your Input. xx

[Jerre]

@Paris13 you can have my input any time

[Paris13]

Thanks, @jerre xx

[msc545]

Keep it at LD.

[Paris13]

Right... xx