What Was Your Good Strategy in Finally Getting Over Your Ex?

Question

Lynx122 · Accepted Answer

Just accept the pain at the start block them remove everything like pictures that you'll see regularly or other reminders. Learn from what didn't work. And then just move on with life. At first just get through the day and do things that need to be done but after a while the brain automatically starts to adjust to a new routine and all the habits of the relationship fade away and it becomes easier to not think about it. Of course it depends on how long the relationship was and how important it was to us since there's levels to that but the process is still the same. There's nothing we can do to speed it up. But you can avoid dragging it out.

OlderAndWiser · Accepted Answer

I always go absolutely no contact, no excuses, no “let’s be friends” nonsense. If you’re my ex, you’re never going to see me again.

Screenwriter · Accepted Answer

I think the best way is to decide that you were never really suited to each other and their actions have played this out.

Usually this takes time to occur, and if you didn't know each other well to begin with, years can go by, or a serious event has to occur to show that you just can't stay together.

And also, relationships have timelines. They work for periods of time and then they often fizzle out. This happens with friendships, acquaintances, jobs, marriages, relationships. You were in the right place right time. Finally, that's no longer true.

Be grateful you found this out and weren't stuck with each other forever. Good luck.

Akothee005 · Accepted Answer

The first thing to do is to accept that it's over between you two and that it was never meant to be and that's when you'll have peace with yourself and your situation and that's when you can try to interact with other people and keep yourself busy.

Finchie40 · Answer

Have sex with someone else that finds you attractive and that you find attractive as well , you don’t have to rush into a new relationship with anyone , but it’s better to invest your time into yourself and that someone new, instead of investing your time into an ex , that no longer values or wants you anymore, that probably already cheated on you in the first place , so if your ex truly loved and valued you? they wouldn’t of broke up with you in the first place? Never be a sitting duck for anyone that can easily walk away from you , you will be just wasting your time and energy on someone that chose to walk away from you instead of choosing to stand by you. People that hold onto their exes are just wasting their time, and energy on someone that is no longer there , bottom line is , people don’t walk away from people they truly love and care about , so always remember these words , it will hopefully help you move on and look At relationships a different way and hopefully help you meet someone that values you like you value them. Love only comes from valuing yourself worth first , once you learn to love yourself and be happy with yourself , more than likely someone else will want to share that with you , Taking an ex back is like trying to reheat Mcdonald French fries in a microwave , it will never be the same

DaveJord · Answer

Dating again... honestly. Rebound fucks and girlfriends/ boyfriends does help you get over you ex.

Dating either validates all the reasons why that relationship failed. Because the more people of the opposite sexy you come into contact with validates why all you previous relationships failed, it forces you learn and get better at dating. You start to make smarter and better choices and you learn when to get out of a relationship and when one really had the legs to endure.

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Avicenna · Answer

Meeting other women accomplished that quickly

AviatorTom · Answer

Easy strategy. Find another woman, which I did after dating several.

MissStrawberry912 · Answer

Learning to accept that it didn’t work out and why it didn’t work out, there won’t be a future, and it’s okay to miss/love them even though it all hurts. Go at your own pace. Be gentle while staying honest with yourself it is okay you love/miss them and why it also won’t work out due to the break up. Cut/give space in communicating with your ex and don’t see them anytime soon, but solely focus on yourself, your healing journey, what did you learn from this relationship and yourself, and your life/goals after the relationship.

going on dates with other people who you find attractive and/or potentially compatible with will help you realize you’re still worthy, you can also build connection with others that isn’t just your ex and maybe in more ways than you expected, you still a bomb ass catch, and your soulmate is in your future and not your past.

if your ex is meant to come back and be yours, it will happen once you guys grown abit and resolved old issues while you were apart.

MysticAngel5000 · Answer

Stop sugarcoating things. Recognize that he was NOT Mr. Perfect. While I am not perfect either, there were some real issues that were being covered up. Accept it for what it is. Don't lie to yourself. Accept the real truth. It's fine to be upset, disappointed and angry. Process your feelings in a healthy manner, work on loving yourself and healing, then focus on moving on when you are ready for a new relationship.

Forget about the past. Leave it behind where it belongs. Delete the messages. Delete the pics. Remove them from social media. You have no business still being informed of their every move and they don't need to know yours. As harsh as it sounds, just stop carrying. That chapter of your life is over. Move on to the next one.

Married_mature · Answer

The first thing is to be sure that you want to be over your ex. Once you are sure on that, first thing is to block them everywhere. Memories are not good when it comes to moving on. Second thing is mental strength. You need to be mature. Being practical helps here. You should understand that end of a relationship is not end of world for you.

This should also know that you will feel weak, need your ex at times. But the ones who are practical move on faster. When you are ending something, be sure on it.

mandyfire98 · Answer

Usually it's get your mind off of them. Stay busy, surround yourself with friends. Another way is to honestly go out on dates. Focus on other men or women.

Anonymous · Answer

Not my ex but a really big crush I had and ended bad for me… I moved… BIG move. I got away from everything. Just gave life and myself a fresh coat of paint. Lived new experiences. Made new memories.

I highly recommend this solution. It gives you a sense of how small you and your problems really are. Really bursts your little hometown bubble.

Stefan181 · Answer

Usually I just kept myself busy and summon my inner social butterfly...
But my last breakup happened 7 months ago and I still struggle most days
Sometimes its harder to get over the ones we didn't want to loose
The trauma is almost like a sudden death of a loved one... suddenly gone... can't see, touch or here their voice anymore ...

Mike87479 · Answer

I was extremely depressed for weeks. Then one night I got drunk at a bar with a buddy and he said something to me about getting over her and the next morning I woke up feeling completely normal and found myself over it. To this day neither one of us remember what he told me. Lol.

DiegoO · Answer

I deleted all her pics, I deleted all her emails and DM. Burned some gift we shared—very personal ones—, 🤔I... Gave away a teddy she gave me as present, to a local church (they were begging for charity). Essentially, most things that reminded me the relationship we had.

nawtee_me · Answer

Forgive him…. Forgiving does not mean forgetting… It allows you to not be reminded of the negative every time his name is mentioned or the thought of him pops into your head. Forgiveness is for your well being, not his.
No one want a threesome for a relationship. But if you do not settle this in your heart then you bring him with you into your next relationship.

thegreenyogi · Answer

Doing all the things I couldn't do or at least not to the fullest when I was in a relationship. So basically just be in a live relationship with me and myself.

Brittanykeen88 · Answer

Ghosted him. It might work for others to stay friends but personally, no contact is best after breaking up. There's a saying, if people stay friends after a break up, they either were never in love or still in love.

AaronKrieger · Answer

First process it and flush it out of your system, so think of it like a poison that you are slowly getting rid of, then stay busy. The rest will come with time and realization of mistakes you made, which you can learn from.

MaDaSs · Answer

I have been in that phase, where I could not get over it for around 4 years because I felt that I was incapable of being with another person, but I honestly in those 4 years realised that it's how you perceive the other person. Actually you are here as one, you came alone and you are going that way. In between what you do is a choice and it should always be so. . . Instead of compulsion of any sort!

Jasmin01 · Answer

As the guy cheated on me, I broke up with him and blocked any further contact. Another one, we both agreed, that our relationship was a mistake, but we continue to talk once in a while.

Amoreuchiha · Answer

Falling in love again with a better person and telling his close friends about it. It feels satisfying, helpful to forget about the pain, makes your mind busy off old painful memories, and has a slight taste of vengeance when he knows how happy you are (good in the scenario of him being the reason or the one who broke off the relationship)

m1tch3ll · Answer

one word for the guys- fuckaholaottabitches

for the girls dont do that too often cause you'll be a slut and become romantically unattractive, instead work ok yourself get some more friends work up some more money

Altheavas · Answer

It doesn’t take time, maybe 4 months to forget the person. Then 1 year to free myself from the issues related to us.

RHK36 · Answer

Growing up and learning that letting go is a part of life. Lingering is just regret and that's a waste of time. Realized better to use your head over heart in those moments because being logical helps you move forward.

red324 · Answer

I realized she probably does the same thing to every other guy. She's probably someone else's nightmare now. After a certain point you just kind of shake your head and smile. There was a guy shortly before me, there was me, pretty sure another one or two shortly after. All within like a 5 month period. Let's just go from guy to guy to guy and not put any effort into anyone of them. Glad I never had sex with her. Damn hoe

Anyone else finding that online dating apps seem dead? I got kicked off tinder and only have been on one date since February. I used to be able to go on a date every week or two if I wanted.

strateguy632 · Answer

after one, i cried when i got a "match", so i knew i wasn't ready but still by meeting her anyway, i moved ahead to a fresh start

Holsen · Answer

Having a good final clearance with her to feel like you have put and end to that chapter with an easy mindset!!

Mark987 · Answer

Music.. Friends.. and keep busy.. I was dating a Woman who to me was way outta my league. She kinda knew that and used it to her advantage and ended up cheating on me. I kept busy with friends, music, and the gym..

DeeDeeDeVour · Answer

I always kept myself busy because I was always striving to become successful.

katiesmuff · Answer

Get somebody else into my pants as soon as possible.

DannyUk2017 · Answer

Limited contact to None. Staying far away as possible.

BoobMan · Answer

Paris, the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else! ;)

bededazzle · Answer

accepting that i would never fully get over her, and that this was ok

Anonymous · Answer

Well she made it easier for me. She had an event in her life that kept her out of mine for 6 months. And that gave me time to clear my head. When she came back she no longer had the mental hold on me. She tried to regain it but I stonewalled her at every turn. Then she started stalking me. Which felt good after the s*** she put me through. Finally after 2 years she gave up and blocked me. Sometimes I wonder if it still bothers her that she never got closure, maybe she got over it. I can only hope she didn't. But at least I have the consolation of knowing towards the end I gave as good as I got.

lilBigPotato · Answer

Find someone else. Only way that reliably works

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

You just have to make a clean break. Cut everything off and move on with your life. Surround yourself with friends and family and get back into you like to do and get back into life. That's the only way to do it

WhitneySnow · Answer

Talking to friends and avoiding him as much as possible

caitycat21 · Answer

Quit romanticizing the qualities about him that I loved and look at the relationship from a third person outsider view. It made me start to realize how shitty of a boyfriend he actually was to me, right now currently I’ve just also been improving on myself. Working things out in therapy, working out in the gym, eating right, doing things I love

KelleyN · Answer

I lost my virginity as a freshman to big man on campus (Smart, very good looking, and rich) and it didn't take him long. I knew and was told what he was like, but I said he will be different with me. He wasn't. He dated me for a while and dumped me for the next pretty and foolish young thing. So now I am a soiled woman with a lower sexual market value. However, it wasn't a total loss, I got an education.

So, what did I do? First, I was hurt, next, I was furious. Then I realized that life goes on and I must make the best of it. Therefore, I resumed dating other guys. Perhaps, I can't marry as good as I could have when my sexual market value was higher, but I can still marry a quality guy.

integrale77 · Answer

Loads of meaningless sex over a number of years including several gangbangs and a threesome.

In my case my ex cheated on me so that was my way to attend to my needs. Yes it was using a lot of women but most of them where aware that was the deal beforehand!

Anon_desi · Answer

Cut off all contact with them and do things that you enjoy

exitseven · Answer

I found somebody who is so much better than my ex

love_conquers_lust · Answer

Focus on everything else I did consistently.

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

I see them as a lesson and move on to the next. There are reasons why you liked him, why you disliked him. Things he liked about you, didn't like about you. What did he do right, what did he do wrong? What did I right, what did I do wrong, What could I have done differently? What qualities did I like in this man? What qualities didn't I like? What qualities did he like and what didn't he like? I'll take all this into account into my next relationship.

TacosRAwesome · Answer

Looking at his Facebook posts and realising how basic he is.

Yannae · Answer

I don't look at what could have been, but instead at what could be Now. Easy.

Andres77 · Answer

Stay busy doing something else that you love (as long as his name isn’t Chad).

msc545 · Answer

My best strategy was realizing what a hateful disturbed woman she is and beginning to feel sorry for her.

ohmyguy · Answer

By understanding though self reflection.. recognising my own flawed self n nature.. knowing you can still have love for them even though there not in your life. I learned to understand there point of veiw... it helps to rid your self of anger and resentment... re evaluate your past present n future.. n prepare your self for a more fufiling future partner..

bolverk · Answer

Change your phone number/email/social media & banking passwords, and lock you credit.
Clear out anything that belongs to or reminds you of your Ex, including the bed, then redecorate through out the house/apartment and then rearrange the furniture in the main-room and bedroom so it look nothing like the space your Ex knew.
Avoid anyone who was close with them, focus on your own friends & family, and move on.

Iron_Man · Answer

There was no strategy it took three years we continue to talk, but it took a long time

LiamJHayden · Answer

I've never had any issue getting over someone who was no longer into me.

Likes2drive · Answer

Find another person to date, that usually works

FenixG45 · Answer

A complete break. We weren't mean or vicious. We just stopped daily calling/texting; cold turkey! It was super hard at first! I cried a LOT!

fuddly · Answer

For me, like others, being alone was the hard part.  And only after i met someone new did i forget about first girl

Anonymous · Answer

For me it was accepting the ugly truth that once a woman no longer finds value in a man then he’s expendable. Less then human in many circumstances. If doesn’t matter if what he did was wrong or right. Once she makes an emotional decision to go there the facts no longer matter. Only her feelings.

As unfair as it is I have to accept that.

OddBeMe · Answer

Mae West said “best way to get over someone is to get under someone.”

Maddy2002_ · Answer

Go no contact best way. Cheesy movie. And threesome with Ben and Jerry’s.

mrpk02 · Answer

As bad as it sounds... Go out. Be yourself. Flirt with other people after immediately and just get distractions. Work, friends, flirts 😭

stormpanda · Answer

I'm naturally good at getting over people not strategy is needed. But I'm horrible at getting over issues that correlate with people!

Jmmmfi4 · Answer

I LITERALLY NEVER DO. I WISH I KNEW HOW BELIEVE ME.

ohvanillalattegal · Answer

Under someone or just focusing on me

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