What are some ways to rebuild my self-love after getting ghosted?

Question

I got ghosted recently and I need to rebuild my self confidence and self love. I’m doing things like trying to get my bag up, trying to find a gym to join rather than exercise at home, etc. but what more could I do?

HollyK21 · Accepted Answer

Getting your bag, gym, those are great distractions/stress relievers but don’t address the heart of the issue, which is the toll that rejection is taking when it shouldn’t bother you much at all (since this happens at such an early phase). Start doing shadow work, which is basically working to reveal and heal things going on that you may have subconsciously suppressed, like trauma. There’s a reason why you equate self-love to what men think of you, whether a man wants you or not, get to the bottom of why, so you can heal it, then progress can be made.

jazzy34 · Accepted Answer

Simple. Knowing that  you’re  not the problem. I know. Getting ghosted sucks, but remember that person was too cowardly to be an adult and tell you what the problem was.

loveslongnails · Accepted Answer

Whatever you do, do it for YOU. Getting ghosted or dumped is often not as bad as it seems because perhaps you were blinded by your hopes and didn't see the real person. If you want to make changes in your life, that's great, just do it for yourself and not because you think something's wrong with you because a guy stopped texting you, or meeting up with you. You're 22; there's a lot of road ahead.

DryGermanGuy · Accepted Answer

Just do the things you like to do anyway, only more so. If you like to do sports, get on your bike and drive around. If you like to hang out with friends, go to clubs and events. If you like to watch TV. series, find a new one you like. Get a healthy activity mix going for you.

ohsheeT · Answer

Stop. Be. still
dont move
dont speak
shhh. Hhhhhh

Let's just be quiet.
And that's accepted
Acknowledge what happened be honest what happened

Dont beat your self up because a guy ghosting you what are you talking about. Rebuild. You what. What is there to rebuild. first you have to be honest... dont punish yourself. You did nothing wrong. The true is this man did something so great for you.. He proved to you he is not the guy for you. He's a runner. When thing get tough He he's not responsible he couldn't take care of you because he's a puss and you need to thank him for doing it. He proved to you he syvh a scared little man with no balls. Because he didn'.
T say Hey, it's just not gonna work out anything.
If you had a problem in life he couldn't take care of you. He would run from you quit this was all meant to happen. He wasn't right for you to universe it and said Goodbye. You need to look at it for what it really is and thank the man... when you can think that way you will feel your energy shift inside.
And you will see it is true. The great est thing you can do is learn from it understand what kinda man he really is

Relationship people say its a 50/ 50 deal

You were doing your 50 % every day to prove to him who you are. He couldn't give you his 50 / for what ever reasons. First reason is fake and you were catching on
He wasn't mature enough. He wasn't capable of having.

I say Relationship are 100/100.

Because some days your partner can't give you that 50 % so give him part of you 100% if he still can't give you 50. Then you dont want him in your life. Tell me where the love was. No dont tell me tell your self

And if you want to rebuild any thing first things first acknowledge it accepted and say thank you, and then drop it. Let it go cause your new life. Just started right there. With a smile on your face, a wiggle in your butt and enjoy life again. You got lucky.
Because that kind of guy would just suck you dry.

You would go to work every day. You would stay home play video games. Not even have dinner cooks.

The next time a guy comes into your life. Be quiet, don't say anything. Listen listen to him talk and the more you listen the more he will say. And watches eyes as he's saying it because he will tell you the truth with every lie. He's telling you that guy told you exactly who he was somewhere in the beginning. You just didn't hear.

so many ways. Hey is wrong for you

Summeroflove · Answer

Number one ghosting someone says more about the other person then it says about you. It’s frankly a cowardly act by someone too scared to face you and tell you the truth. But honestly leaning someone without a exclamation tends to just piss someone off even more.

This is also common behavior of narcissists who feel zero remorse when they simply cut people off. You have empathy and genuinely care about someone else meaning it’s going to hurt and it’s okay to hurt it’s normal.

The best thing you can do is grieve it out that’s the best way to eventually move on and find someone better or at minimum be at peace single. A narcissist will ghost anyone…. Doesn’t matter how amazing you are.

Destroying another persons self confidence is what these people thrive off of. But he’s probably waiting around seeing if you’re going to beg him or ask for a exclamation. Don’t bother with him because no matter what you say. Whether that’s begging for him back or expressing anger is feeding them. It doesn’t matter what you’re saying or doing they like knowing that they’re getting to you.

You’re doing great doing things that build you up as a person but don’t only distract yourself sometimes grieving is honestly the best way to get over something. Because if you ignore it it stays in the back of your mind until you deal with it.

DishLady · Answer

You should have self-love anyway. Why is your self-love dependent on whether some guy ghosts or doesn't ghost you?

lightbulb27 · Answer

Being cut off and ghosted is the worst, it may even hit old deep wounds from childhood like fear of abandoment or losing someone, etc..

So take the opportunity to reflect on self while rebuilding based upon what you love, what makes you feel good. Exercise, connecting with family and friends, serve others including animals. Giving is better than receiving in some ways. Spend time in nature getting regrounded.

do exercises like putting yourself in challenging scenarios, recording how you feel and working on feeling better about yourself. Meditate to heal. Learn whatever lessons you can... and move on.

If you take opportunity to rebuild yourself , you come out better for the next person. If you learned something you can avoid the same pain or minimize it's effects.

good luck!

MisterWack · Answer

That is a good step forward with finding a gym to join and exercise there rather than home. I commend you on your approach to taking control to build yourself up, a lot of people including myself could learn a thing or two from that. I’m a subscriber to the notion ‘Change Starts With You’.

To rebuild your self confidence and self love, I would recommend hanging out with those that care about you because the reasons they hang around you is because of the wonderful person you are and have become. Having those voices around, can really lift you up.

I’d also recommend taking walks at a park or take up hiking , that can really be calming and soothing serene especially being surrounded by nature.

You are coming a long way and I’m positive you’ll rebound as you put in the effort to build yourself back up. Prayers be with you.

genericname85 · Answer

what do you mean "rebuild". being ghosted doesn't usually do damage. like if being ghosted ruins your confidence, there was no confidence to begin with. I don't know if you're being a drama queen or of you actually feel that down after being ghosted. apparently he wasn't interested in you. so what? that doesn't take away anything from you. nobody likes everyone so that's completely fine. plus ghosting someone isn't even a very mature thing, so you are doding a bullet. what's really the problem here?

nawtee_me · Answer

By remembering that you being ghosted is not about you. It is about the inability to of the other guy to be honest with you. It is about the guy that only knows how to use people and has serious trust issues. You are better than that…. And it is his lost not yours…..

Caroline91 · Answer

I don't understand why ghosting should affect your feelings about yourself. It is an unkind and cruel thing to do, But is a reflection of the person doing the ghosting.

Rangers · Answer

Recognize that a guy who dates around instead of committing isn't worth your time. It was only a matter of time before you walked in on him screwing your sister, or something. Better you don't go through that

WhitneySnow · Answer

Remind yourself that anyone who would ghost you is not worth your time and was probably just using you anyway

Shiprex · Answer

Go out for a walk, cycle, drive somewhere but probably better to be around others or just speak to someone on the phone

Nikki1989 · Answer

Ghosting is a reflection of the other person's communication style, not your value.

AliceGregory · Answer

Girl, you've gotta get a circle of women in your life.

leahzrc · Answer

Listen to Tobey Maguire's Spiderman and "find religion"

FreyaRed · Answer

You don't really need 8/10 model face to distract yourself with other guys. There are lot of guys with sperms over pressure who can be used as entertainment.

DJB72 · Answer

Try to remember them ghosting you is about them, not you.

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

You got ghosted on time and you doubt yourself. You dont even know why he ghosted you. Maybe he was intimidated by you. Have you ever thought that might be the reason?

Panthero80 · Answer

I always think if someone treats you rudely that you are better than that person. Think about it. Would you really want to be with someone who doesn't respect you?

YourExLover69 · Answer

I have been ghosted several times especially on this website. Time heals. Now I'm used to it. Online friends are nothing but deception. Rarely you will get someone loyal here dear.

LiamS95 · Answer

Any guy that would actually ghost a woman as beautiful as you doesn't deserve you.

msg321 · Answer

Remember that this is not about you. It is totally about the person ghosted you.

Paige90 · Answer

What do you mean by "self love?"

eagle1951 · Answer

must not have been the one for you, so why worry about it. Move on

oswaldcobblepot · Answer

You have a great rack!  I wouldn't ghost you. 👻

Luopio27 · Answer

Go to a night club with your female friends. Maybe you get someone new over there!

LiamJHayden · Answer

Recognize that ghosters tend to be the issue, not the ghosted.

Clear_Skies10 · Answer

Who the hell would ghost you? He's crazy.

talka20 · Answer

Help people and keep busy

WonderingManII · Answer

Face it people are mean now days.

dudeinohio · Answer

Just keep. trying patience and persistence wins.

LunarEclipse433 · Answer

Just have faith in yourself.

thegreenyogi · Answer

Remember that when someone ghosts you

MasterKS · Answer

Be positive and be natural.

girlyisaskinh · Answer

Do you have mo arms?

What are some ways to rebuild my self-love after getting ghosted?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

What are some ways to rebuild my self-love after getting ghosted?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.