10 Signs He's A Player

I believe it’s safe to say, that a many of us have encountered one or more players in our past. If you haven’t had the “pleasure” of meeting one yet or think you’re talking to one. Here are a few signs to keep you aware that he’s probably playing you and other girls. This could save you from a broken heart and several nights of crying yourself to sleep.


1. He’s calling or texting after 11 and 12 pm

There are 24 hours in a day, if he really liked you he could have chosen a better time just to say hi. After 11pm are the usual “booty call” hours, which means he just wants to sleep with you. You might think it’s cute, he was thinking about me, how sweet of him. Well not really, because you probably aren’t the only one he’s texting or calling at that time.

2. He has way too many girls that are friends

10 Signs He's A Player

If he has more girls that are friends then guys we have a problem. Typical players like getting around, talking to more than one female at a time. If a lot of girls know who he is, chances are that he’s received the title of being a player by now. Which is a huge red flag, stay away from him!
"He’s a smooth talker, knows what to say when you’re mad, upset, or down."

3. He knows exactly what to say

In other words he’s a smooth talker, knows what to say when you’re mad, upset, or down. He’ll make you feel special that you’ll believe his words and you will trust he’s a “nice guy”. By this time he basically has you wrapped around his finger, and will control your emotions.

4. Talks too much about physical things with you

If he doesn’t talk about it directly, he will take it along those lines. Wishing you were with him in his room or yours etc.

5. They act like the sweetest person in the world

When you two talk you feel like he’s the greatest person in the world. He’s everything you’ve been looking for in a guy. That’s just an act don’t believe it, it’s not worth the pain later on. This leads me into numero seis(#6)…

6. Acts different around his friends

He either forgets who you are in front of his guy friends or acts like the biggest d***. This is usually when the real him comes out, he doesn’t give a crap and will not speak to you.
If neither of these is the case, he gives you a hug in front of his boys. This is a sign of him showing them, “hey guys, this is the next victim”.

7. They are cocky and over confident

10 Signs He's A Player

I’m going to sound like stereotype but I’ll take it, majority of player do come from an athletic background. Whether they play football, basketball, baseball, soccer etc. Guys like these are knows as jocks, most are cocky as it is and know they can get the girl they want. But players over do it, they know they can get with as many girls as they want.

8. He’s not interested in your life

Sure he ask how your day was and stuff like that, but does he really care?. I think not. They make it seem like they do, when in reality they could care less. They just want to get to the point and see if you’re willing to sleep with him or not.

9. You have to be the one contacting him

So, he use to text you 24/7 right? But then it stopped do you wanna know why that is..Best guess is he found another female that’s going to keep him company. If you’ve already slept with him chances are he’s not coming back since you gave him what he wanted. If he does come back he’s just coming back for more. But who’s going to give into texting first you or him? If you have not had sex with him, he’s realized you’re not going to and has forgotten about you. Which means by now that you have developed some kind of feeling for him, and you’re going to try to get his attention back.

10. Finds an excuse to avoid hanging out

They aren’t looking for a commitment, so they will come up with anything to stop being seen in public with you. Unless he’s really that good at his game that he knows by the end of the night he’s getting some.
10 Signs He's A Player

These are just some signs to know in case you find yourself talking to one. Please don’t think you’ll be the one that changes him, I got news for you. You’re not going to change him; chances are he’s going to break you before you do that. If you still wanna go ahead and think you will, go ahead but good luck.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The difficult thing is that these players are usually also very attractive men who's popular amongst his peers. The way men rationalize it is, he can have any girl he wants so why stop at only one. His ego is driving his dumb ass so he seeks to get as many girls as he can to make himself feel good. But it's all fake. If he needs external stimulation to feel confident and special, it's not real confidence.

    If sleeping with many men weren't stigmatized in society, even though nowadays it's much less, there would be much more women players

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Most Helpful Girl

  • yes this is true but from my experience you won't notice these signs until after you have been played so the real best advice is for you to be a woman with standards because no player is gonna stick around with you if your plan is to wait before having sex (at least a few months) and only after he has taken you out on dates and spent quality time getting to know you. A player is only after sex so unless you just want sex too, then don't feel played by him when he doesn't show signs that he cares.

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What Guys Said 76

  • I mostly agree with bersaba, and mostly disagree with the article.

    N# 4, 8, 9 and 10 can be signs that he is a player, but the rest... nah.

    I basically have no experience, and I can assure you that I had opportunities that I preferred not to use... (or, "exploit", in my opinion).

    Yet, # 1, 2, 3, 5, 6 and 10 are exactly who I am. I could've been 7 too if I wasn't a really shy guy. That leaves 4, 8 and 9 as really "player" characteristics. (I decided that 10 is not really the case either.

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  • And playerhater, I'm open to the idea that I maybe wrong about this, but I also have a lot of confidence that you may one day look back and see that you in fact were "playing" to fill some sort of hole that you didn't realize existed. Even if you have good intentions for whoever you're talking with and your relationship/friendship with her, any manipulation or "saying the right thing" for her sake is not good if it's not truthful. Again, I could be wrong, but think about it.

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  • As an accidental former player (used it as a reaction to a bad breakup), I can confirm most of this is true. I'm good at reading other people, and I used that to know what to say to girls to get close to them, just wanting to be less lonely. I wasn't intentionally "playing," but most of the time, those relationships turned to nothing or just friendships with the girl wishing there had been more based on my seeming interest in her.

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  • This is a very good article. All your points are spot-on. And yes, at the guy who said guys can't be smooth talkers without being players - that's true as well. If the guy know exactly what to say, and makes the girl feel super-special, where do you think he got that from? It goes way beyond common-sense, which is what you use when you talk to someone you care about. You do NOT tell her a bunch of sh*t which worked with previous girls, like players always do.

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  • LOL, this is SUCH rubbish, what its saying to women is

    "hey this guy has you interested.. well guess what he's a d*** so get rid of him"

    next thing you know this bloke whos worked hard to get the girl he wants on his side tries to call her to invite her on a date but she won't answer the phone becouse she's scared of getting hurt all becouse she decided to read this..

    its such man bashing rubbish

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  • I possess most of these, and i have never been a 'player'

    Also, I think the term is pretty much voided if women showed greater wisdom in the qualities in men they go for.

    But, i guess it is always easier to play victim than it is to face up to bad choices

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    • Yeah I'm an introvert so already it's hard enough to talk to women, more often than not because of this I tend to come off the wrong way I think inadvertently. I back off for the sake of peace when a woman rejects me, i guess I take it personal. Try not to get anything stirred up remain quiet and distant even more so now that I've been rejected. Then the woman acts all different kinds standoffish?

  • i would hate for women to talk about this..in this manner because you forget the one thing a player is good for sex...women even though I didn't wanna say it is you guys play harder with this friendzone thing is an excuse for playing guys and turning them into fairys boys..atless a playe will give you something but being a girls friend and being teased for your whole life thinking your getting to her heart is the biggest game of all for you ladies

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  • ~80% of the time girls get played, it's because they're sexually easy. If they weren't, then most players would bail to find someone easier. If girls waited several months after the start of a relationship, they would avoid most players. Girls should also follow (7), since ~90% of extremely confident guys are faking confidence, and if they'll fake the start of a relationship, they'll fake the rest. Lastly, follow (4). If girls do this, they will be hard to play.

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  • It's a sad truth, but it's 110% true. That being said, there are exceptions as per everything, so don't go breaking up or ignoring or friend-zoning a guy because he has some traits that are mentioned in this article, there are some genuine guys out there, rare but there.

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  • Having a lot of female friends doesn't make him a player. It mean the opposite, maybe those are the women he might have wanted to be with at one time but they didn't like him back. Or maybe he just enjoys the kind of conversations you can have with women that can often be quite comforting, finds that you can often have a deeper conversation with a woman. Also him trying to rush you into sex doesn't necessarily make him a player either. Desperate horny young maybe but not necessarily a player

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  • Here's 5 real signs he's a player.

    1: You find him sleeping with someone else

    2: You hear him talking on the phone and he says "baby, honey, yeah I'll come over with the condoms"

    3: He says "I've been sleeping with your sister"

    4: 3 different people in the same day come up to you and say "He's a player, I was with him last week"

    5: He gets genital warts, and it's not from you.

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  • 1, 2, 3, 4 5, 6, 7, 9, and 10 are not true. Please do not read too much into this article ladies- I like #8 though. Some of these might be true some of the time, but there are SOO MANY ways to disprove all of these, so to take maybe 5/10 of these and classify someone as a "player" is completely invalid.

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  • 10. (cont) try to hang out with the girl as much as possible, to increase his chances of getting laid, and if he becomes "busy" one night he might have another girl he is hanging out with. But chances are he's going to try and get with you as much as possible till the girl stops putting out.

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  • 8. (cont) maybe he does care what you have to say, and about your life. How are you going to know for sure if he is being true, or if he is just saying it to get in your pants?

    9. If a guy contacts you 24/7 then stops, ever thought that maybe he's tired of being the one who does the contacting, and wants to see if you truly care about him. If you don't ever text him first, then why should he believe you care for him?

    10.I think a player would do the exact opposite, try to hang out as much as

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  • 5.Maybe the guy truly is the sweetest guy in the world. Yes a player does play this game, which makes it harder for a true sweet guy to get a girl because by the time they get around to a girl, she has already been with a player who does that so she stays away.

    6.Thats not a sign of a player, that's just a sign of a jackass.

    7.As long as you don't stereotype all athletes under that category I'm fine with your reasoning.

    8.How are you going to know if a guy truly is interested in a girls life

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  • I agree in some instances but it goes both ways I will give an example for each one

    1. He could get off work late, and can't text at work. Wants to know how his girls day is. Or wishes her goodnight.

    2.A guy can have more female friends than male friends and not be a player. It all depends on who he gets along better with, males or females.

    3. Its not hard for a genuine guy to know what to say, the guys who don't know what to say are usually the shy type.

    4.This goes one way. player.

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  • Why does this sound like someone had feelings for a guy and these are the results of their relationship? First off I agree with #1 anyone texting or calling that late is a booty call. #2 compeletly wrong! I'm a guy and only have girls as friends and that's because I don't get along with other guys. How come its OK for females not to get along but not for men? #3 In terms with players then I agree, but men in general no. The rest I can deal with but the worst is #2 and 3.....

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  • Some of these are wrong.

    2) I have a lot of female friends. Has nothing to do with being a player. They wouldn't want to be my friend if I was one...

    5) Not true. If I like a girl I will be sweet, as long as she is sweet to me. If he agrees with EVERYTHING you say however, and never disagrees with you ever, he's probably a player...

    8) Sometimes a guy does care.

    10) He doesn't like you, but he doesn't want to hurt you by telling you so. Move on.

    You're a little too paranoid.

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  • Don't you realize how BILLIONS of men rich in diversity that populate. Then you base your generalisation about a gender that YOU'RE NOT. You run the risk of meting out these prejudices and misconceptions to innocent man who is nieve about women. Can you see why some young men are depressed and in despair that he "can't" get a girlfriend, you've seen it in gAg. The reason is because of the barricades that women put up. I guess the reason for your fortification was based on your ex.

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  • Girls take this with a pinch of salt. This is NOT a definitive guide of idenfying a cheat. This article is potentially dangerous and disempowering to GENUINE guys. Some them display these traits and will be FALSELY accused of being a cheat. A woman would need have a doctorate in Andropsychology and spent decades meeting the diversity of men. What I find annoying that women talk like they are experts on men. When they don't know what they are talking about.

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  • This clearly written by woman who's been burnt. It looks to me (when you revisit points 8 - 10) that this guy wanted out. And is letting you down "easy". Each of the ten points can be nullified in some legitmate way. The ONLY sign of player is CATCH him at it. What you've got to remember is that YOU CHOSE HIM, you ALLOWED him inside your knickers, or was it rape? Now you have to identify and learn from your mistakes. So you can move on from this.

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  • WOW this is not true AT ALL. I know tons of guys that are smooth and really nice and aren't players. If anything, girls are the players. they have guys talking to them all the time and can choose which one they want. Doesn't that define a player? Someone that gets a lot of ass?

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  • Can someone make an article about the female player? I think that would be more interesting to read. Most of things mentioned in this are obvious. When it comes to girls, deception is a little harder to figure if they are elite.

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  • Okay, a few things you're wrong on:

    1. Yes you are horribly stereotyping, most players that I know are p*ss poor at sports, even golf if you count that as a sport. Most true athletes are actually very shy guys, they dedicate a lot of their time to sport because they don't go out as often as a player will.

    2. Overconfidence? Just my personal view but you can never be too sure of yourself.

    3. As for smooth talker, it's good to avoid verbal fighting, not a negative.

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  • 1) I always text people late at night; girls and guys. It's like at a slumber party how conversation gets way more honest and interesting when people are tired.

    8) doesn't seem to make much sense lol. You're saying even if he doesn't care about your life he'll ask how your day was?

    hmmm how about this? Don't f*ck a guy until you've been together for a while! if you do it anyway, he's not a douche, you're just stupid. I could shoot down at least half of these with enough character space

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  • I can't agree with this article at all. I'm 20 and still a virgin. I have a lot of girl friends but never dated any of them. Don't have a lot of guy friends as they tend to be a little annoying and like to itemize their women and growing up with two sisters, I can't stand that.

    Sounds like you have had a couple bad run ins and had similar instances with both. But I do agree with some of the points but 97% I dont.

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  • You find they never talk about anything of value. Never going deep on any subject that has to do with them and their life or yours for that matter. and no matter how much you try they can never seem to find the time to hang with you and your peeps for any real quality time. Finally. Have they ever asked you to make any sacrafices and you made them for them, but found that if you ask them to do small request for you they either refused or do so under protest? Get out. They are playing you.

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  • 1. For most people this is just wrong.

    2.He might not get along with guys. Some people are like that. If a girl has to many guy friends she's not automatically a whore/slut.

    3. Completely agree with this one.

    4. For the most part I agree with this also.

    5. Ever heard of a nice guy? Well that's how they act.

    6. This is true. A guy isn't going to be exactly the same around his friends but he shouldn't be extremely different.

    7. Agreed 100%

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  • Is he for You?

    What feeling do you get when you look into his eyes? Does he get the same feeling when he looks into your eyes? Does your heart skip a beat when you seem him? Doe his? Do you feel deep down inside that this is your true soulmate? If not, then don't give 100% of your self until you are certain that you are getting 100% from him.

    Voila to find out how get your man and keep him.

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  • So many of those things are just not true, so you telling me every guy that asks a girl how her day been doesn't care? And if the guy calls are text late at night he just want some? whoah I understand the acts differently with you in public but if the dude shows you his sweet side in public and when you guys are alone how is he showing his friend your the next "victim"? This article is bias and written in one point of view obviously by a female who got their heart broken, all I'm saying is not

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What Girls Said 51

  • Honestly, I've had an ex-boyfriend who has been guilty of showing ALL of these "signs", and in fact, he was just a player. I literally felt as if I had wrote it myself, or had been recalling his behavior or something in my head. This is almost what I needed to prove myself right in a sense. Of course, a guy calling you late doesn't ALWAYS mean you're a rebound, but if he's ALWAYS calling you late? Big ass red flag right there. I think this article was informative, I can truly say this from exp.

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  • scontent-ord.xx.fbcdn.net/.../...08783907643_n.jpg
    I BETTER GO CALL SHANIQUAQUITA AND TELL HER THAT HER MAN IS JUS BOOTY CALLIN HER

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  • I don't see how anyone would be offended by this. A lot of this is truth. In order to use this type of guide I'd say half of these signals (or more) would have to be occurring at one time. If these signs are happening but the guy isn't a player. You don't want him anyway. If a guy displays only one - or few of these signs. It doesn't necessarily mean anything.

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  • Not Paranoid Thomas..just real

    in regards to your comments.

    1.)Apperantly you don't know how players play in general..and your apperantly missing the point,They pretend to be something they are not!.

    2.)Once again they pretend they are something their not!

    3.)Or sometimes a Guy really DOESN'T care,

    4.)He should man up and grow a pair and tell you straight up he doesn't like u.

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  • I don't think the point of this list was to make everyone evaluate their special someone and yell "OH SHIT HE'S A PLAYER!" I think it's to say the TYPICAL signs of a player, and make sure that women be a little more leary of men with many of these attributes. it's not supposed to freak everyone out.

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  • This is SO true. I compared the list to my ex and 7/10 of these matched with him.

    Although, a guy who matches to 1 or 2 of these doesn't necessarily make him a player.

    Like the athletic thing--guys always try to look athletic-_-

    But otherwise, great article

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  • In all honesty I don't think that all these signs apply to every player out there. I know this one guy and he is the complete opposite of every trait. He never texts me after 11... always in the middle of the day, he's the one that contacts me, he's not a smooth talker, he doesn't find excuses to avoid hanging out with me, he doesn't act like a d*** to me in front of his friends and he pays much more attention to me than his friends, etc. But he's clearly a player and I know he has many girls.

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  • Ive dealt with a player just recently, and almost all of these traits he had. Reading some of the comments, I hear some people are freaking out about how these are "player only" traits.. well here is my point of few on that. If he's doing theses things when you guys are just getting to know each other, then yes, he's probably a player. But if you've known each other for awhile and he's shown interest in you that whole time, then there's a good chance he isn't a player.

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  • I have to disagree with 5 because I've been around players who are jerks from the start. They can be hot and cold. Go from being sweet to being a complete asshole and saying things like "your kids will come out retarded" Also look out for them criticizing girls by saying that girls want to act like the songs that are out and degrade themselves but all along the criticizer is trying to get into your pants.

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  • Whoever wrote this article seems very bitter and unhappy!! I feel like this, as an adult you should know within the first few weeks if that person is someone you would like to continue on with or if you need to drop them quicker than Kim K. did Chris Humphreys!!

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  • I. Just love how all of the guys disagree and are offended.

    And Kuato star, do the world a favor and learn how to spell.

    Generally, this article is true for players. She didn't say THE ENTIRE MALE POPULATION.

    It actually is most of the signs of a player. Sooo yeah.

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    • All these "signs" could also apply to nice guys who don't cheat. Why are women so easily brainwashed by this nonsense?

  • Sociopaths, abusers, like the player, they have no guilt or shame using other people and many of them lie so easily that its hard for a victim to know what she/he is dealing with.

    My boyfriend doesn't text me or call me anymore except when he is coming over. I am afraid he may be a player or abuser.

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  • i have been in hiding from a guy I clicked with 6 wks ago.. lovely older sports car own house no kids not married. I vanished on him as we had sex one time and then after 3 weeks he tracked me down. we have clicked wildly as freinds and I really like him. we met up after he tracked me down and once again I found myself having sex with him in his spare room, not in his main 'special' bedroom but always the spare room. all the gilrs at his gym club swish past us whenever we meet for coffee.

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  • #1-8 applied to one of the people I used to know. Too bad when I saw the signs I didn't act on them. Thanks for the article, I'm sure it will benefit a lot of people.

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  • Most of girls of the back can tell what kind of guy they are dealing with.these are signs that players I'VE delte with shown ME...compared to question I've read on here it's pretty similar.

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  • I agree but 3 isn't necessarily true. There are some very perceptive guys who just have that type of empathy. But I do agree with the rest.

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  • I believed that! It's real! That was my experienced before that I will fall to be insane .For girls, be careful use your brain above your heart. Don't let him manipulate your emotions so that at the end you must be prepared. Prayers for players.;-)

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  • exactly like my ex -_- , but i was in love with him so i didn't notice but not anymore

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  • I agree with those ten signs. My ex was a player it took me a while to realize that. Great article by the way

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  • Cant believe how many of these I could relate my friend that I thought had "feelings" for me too..i guess now I know what happened.

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  • I completely agree with this article and it most def. describes a player. I'm dealing with a guy now and he fits every single criteria here on the dot.

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  • I think a lot of these describe everything a guy can do, if all these things make him a player, then what can a guy do that doesn't make him one...?

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  • You just described @Fearless_Banana lmao Amiright? Amiright? 😉 I don't believe that bs you say about you being a virgin.

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  • This article is right on! Every player or guy that only was in search of one thing that I've known tended to fall into many if not all of these categories.

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  • Well thought out and I agree 100%.."Players" pretend they are someone they are not,

    Which is a good guy they lead us on and in the end break our hearts.Good Article!

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  • Ooooo maybe my boyfriend is a player too.. ohh i dont know what should i do. He has so many girl friends too. 😔 how could he do that to me

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  • I feel sorry for you, you seem extremely broken...

    The ONLY TRUTH about a player, is that you'll only know after he's done playing with you.

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  • yep, this is pretty legit. Sad though.. im really into this guy and he does all of these things. Wish i could just stop having feelings.

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  • Lol..whatever dude get off me..this article ain't even for u!!.unless you like that type of thing?

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  • OMG THIS !!! 👏👏👏

    So if a guy is the opposite, is there a chance he genuinely likes you?

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