Want to Know Why Men Stare at Women But Never Approach?

[Applefan1]

I have seen a lot of women ask why men stare but don't talk to them. A lot of it comes down to how many women treat us when we do talk to them. We often get called "creeps" just from saying "hi" to a woman, we get told to "fuck off" and SOME women start massive drama just from saying "hi" to them. It is not an easy task approaching women.

The following video shows how a lot of men get treated when just saying "hi" to a woman. Now I know this video is on the street and I would never just talk to a woman on the street but the women in this video are treating these men how a lot of men get treated when saying "hi" at the coffee shop, library or wherever.

Put yourself in men's shoes. If you got treated like this just for saying "hi" to a woman you would lose your confidence in approaching as well and we all know when something happens people will automatically believe the woman even if she was in the wrong.

Now before anyone goes off in some rant about how I am bitter or whatever I am not. I am just saying how society is. All I am saying is stop falsely accusing men of being creeps just from saying "hi." It can and does destroy a man's reputation and if he has done nothing to deserve it then that is very unfair. If a man really is being a creep then by all means put him in his place, as I understand some men are creeps but please stop falsely labeling men as creeps that are not creeps. A man is NOT a creep just from talking or approaching a woman. SOME men are creeps; just like SOME women are creeps but NOT all men or all women are creeps.

NOW I WOULD LIKE TO SAY I KNOW NOT ALL WOMEN ARE LIKE THIS AND I KNOW SOME MEN PUT WOMEN THROUGH A LOT OF SCARY SHIT BUT TREATING INNOCENT MEN LIKE THEY ARE CREEPS DOES A WORLD OF DAMAGE. THERE ARE LOTS OF GOOD WOMEN OUT THERE BUT THE TRUTH IS THE BAD WOMEN DESTROY IT FOR THE GOOD WOMEN.

Men and women are designed to love each other not hate each other.

[RetroDreamerXD]

Excellent and truthful take! I've actually seen females treating guys like dirt for no reason. Maybe it's an ego problem. Whatever it is women like this know they're wrong for what they do... they're just jerks is all. Good take! #speakthetruth #truth

[Applefan1]

Thank you my friend. You are the first woman to comment so you get the extra point as well. I know what you mean about women treating men like dirt for no reason I have seen women do that as well. I think some women have such a massive ego and act so entitled. I am pleased you like my take.

[BubbleBoy69]

"Men and women are designed to love each other not hate each other."

i.guim.co.uk/.../3423.jpg

That all changed when feminism came.

[Applefan1]

I agree.

[Applefan1]

Also what I mean by that statement is that is why men and women were put on the earth to love each other.

[pnl86]

I'm sorry, I just stopped barfing rainbows.

Step out of your sheltered cave, put the memory of like the handful of girls that have just said "no" to what you wanted in life, and cope with what every child has to learn to cope with in life... not getting what they want.

That's not reality. That's fear. That's catastrophic thinking. It's not real. Is it "possible," sure. Is it probable, no. Why?

I had a client who had full blown narcissistic personality disorder with a side of bipolar I. He would actively seek out antidepressants to fall back into the high of being manic. He was addicted to mania, as many people with bipolar are. Because of this, one of the many lovely parts of his personality was his compulsive playing of the "Try and Collect" (TAC) game. The joke was, he was allergic to signing any document. In truth, he was allergic to being held accountable and responsible. Finally, a creditor dragged him to court, using his name as the first named defendant on the complaint. The plaintiff then scanned a copy of the publicly filed complaint, and linked it across the Internet. Now, every time someone searched his name, the complaint was on the first page of Google. It didn't take long for that case to settle. Why?

Reputation.

Women, no matter how nasty any particular person may be to her core, are intimately aware and very cognizant of their reputation. Women will move mountains to protect and avoid damage to their reputation.

So, women have to balance between the narcissistic reward of feeling desired and wanted by men, or the power trip of rejecting someone brutally, against the cost these actions will have of their reputation. The individual woman doesn't control her behavior because of the effect it will have on other women as a whole, and certainly not because of the effect it will have on men.

If she develops a reputation for rejecting guys hard, or being "very picky," or being "a tease," then quality male opportunities will avoid or evade her, and focus their energy and resources on alternative female opportunities that present a higher chance of success and a lower risk of emotional injury or loss.

Women know this, are aware of it, and act accordingly when a man approaches them.

[Applefan1]

Actually this take is exactly how many women treat men that try and talk to them a lot. I don't agree with your views at all. Many women are extremely rude and crude when men talk to them and yes they are like this to men that have done nothing wrong and have not been creepy as well. The video shows what many women are like.

[Applefan1]

All I am getting from you is another person not wanting to admit the truth because it is a woman doing something bad.

[Applefan1]

You go on about what you think is rude which is not but your opinion is very rude.

[the_rake]

Men stare at women then don't approach because they get nervous. In my experience approaching only a small handful of girls are bitchy and they are not that hard to deal with, you just shrug your shoulders and move on. Call her a b**h under your breath if it really helps (I try not to even do this).

As for me, reasons I sometimes stare but don't approach (I approach a lot, just not always the instant I see a hot girl):

- I'm thinking about going over but then decide that this is not the best possible situation to go over.
- This could be because: there's too many people around; she is with a lot of friends (especially if some of those friends are male, that's tough for me); she is on her phone (laptop I can deal with); she is in a rush to get somewhere; or she just looks busy in general.
- Sometimes I do this if I think she is playing mind games (e. g. she saw me looking, then started playing coy, hot & cold whatever)

I never stare for too long though - don't want to be seen as a creep.

[Applefan1]

I don't fully agree with what you're saying.

[the_rake]

Don't agree with what?

[Applefan1]

That the number of bad women are only a handful. There are a lot of women that act like the women in this video.

[Applefan1]

I know your reasons why sometimes you don't approach as they are also the reasons I often don't approach as well.

[the_rake]

that guy in the video does not know the 'yad stop'. yad stop makes all the difference.

[Applefan1]

That video shows how many women. Not all women treat men.

[the_rake]

Well, women respond very, very differently to the 'yad stop' or 'front stop'. I'm not saying that's right but that's how it is. if you walk up to a woman confidently and stop right in front of her with good open body language, eye contact and voice projection, she will give you some of her time 9/10.

[Applefan1]

What is "yad stop" or "front stop"? As for the second part of your comment that is not always true but at the same time can be true as well.

[the_rake]

It is exactly what I described: you walk in front calmly and confidently and project your voice - "hey", or "excuse me". don't walk backwards, don't start blabbering like the guy did in the video, speak slowly and give the girl some distance (an arm's width). if she has headphones you gesture with your hands for her to move them. approaching the woman smoothly and properly makes all the difference in the world. if doing it in the street is too much, then you've got starbucks, library, clubs, gyms, etc.

[Applefan1]

Yes, I knew you need some distance and smoothly is the way but there are a lot of times that does not work as well.

[the_rake]

I'd have to see what you were doing. There was a time I had my approach completely messed up and I was getting the same reactions as the guy in the video. Again, not saying that's right but ever since I improved my approach, things have been very different, at least initially.

[Applefan1]

Yes and all I am saying is guys get it correct and still get those reactions in that video.

[the_rake]

most guys do not approach anywhere nearly as correct as they think but that's all I'm going to say now.

[Applefan1]

Yeah, well I am talking about the ones that do it correctly and still have women act that way. Anyway, I don't think there is anything more to talk about.

[Ratiocinative]

#1, the video is fake/setup with actors.

#2, you are a creep if you just go up to a women and say "hi". Say something to start a conversation. Saying "hi" just puts the obligation to start the conversation on the other person which is an extremely rude and unattractive thing to do. If you don’t know how to talk to strangers take an improv class or something. Is a woman going to be interested in this conversation?:

Hi.
Hello.
How are you?
Good, how are you?
Nice weather outside.
Yeah it’s not raining today.
Yeah that's cool.
Can I have your number?
Eww! No.

Or is a woman more likely to be interested in a conversation like this?:

Excuse me, which aisle is the Barbecue sauce in?
What? Oh, sorry, I’m not sure I don’t work here.
Are you sure? Just a minute ago I saw a guy stocking shelves wearing that exact same outfit.
Lol, yes I’m sure!
Hi, my name’s Jason, you look like you’re not from around here.
Hi Jason, my name’s Ashley. How could you tell? I actually just moved here from California last year and…

#3, approaching women in public is a skill that needs to be learned just like anything else. You’re probably not going to be a pro at it the first time. The more you practice the better you’ll get.

[Applefan1]

I do not agree with everything you just said.

[Applefan1]

This is why I don't agree with you:

1. The video shows exactly how many women do treat men when men talk to them.

2. Actually no you are not a creep if you go up to a woman and say "hi." That is not what creepy is. Saying "hi" is not an extremely rude thing to do, actually it is a friendly thing to do and people that find it unattractive need to be more understanding of the fact that maybe the person is shy. Saying "hi" at the start does not mean that the conversation is necessarily going to go bad and a woman saying "ew" is extremely rude. The behaviour you have listed here about what you think is creepy and saying "ew" is exactly what is causing the problem of men not approaching or taking to women anymore. The second conversation does have more confidence but as you saw in the video if men are treated by women how the women in the video treated those men they are going to lose confidence and not talk to women and that is only women's fault.

[Applefan1]

3. The video shows exactly how women in public treat men a lot of the time.

Your views have no logic at all and all they are doing is defending women, saying women in this situation are not in the wrong when it is. All I am getting from you is that you are one of these people that thinks women can do nothing wrong ever even when they do and I don't have any time for this.

[noneoftheabove]

you could reverse this and say why dont women approach if they are staring? there are reasons why women dont approach. they get scared of exactly the same thing us men do, and its called rejection. its not the so called norm for women to approach as its supposedly the mans job to do that, but as people have rightly pointed out imagine how many times certain women get hit on a daily basis? you just become another one of those random guys that have hit on her. then stereotypes starting getting involved.

its the same thing on dating websites, imagine how many messages girls get from random guys then you hear guys moaning about how some dont respond.

im going to be honest here but i would never approach a girl when theyre doing their daily routines. its definitely a higher percentage that you'll get rejected if a girl is in a rush even if they find you attractive.

i think we think too much about these types of sitiations. i hear what you're saying but there are many other factors as to why a woman might not respond positively to a 'hi'.

[Applefan1]

I don't agree with your view.

[noneoftheabove]

there's a lot in this comment so i have no idea what you disagree with

[Applefan1]

Well, I do agree you could make a take like this about women.

[Applefan1]

However, I don't agree that being hit on on a daily basis gives a woman any right to treat men like shit.

[Applefan1]

I also don't agree that it makes stereotypes ok either.

[noneoftheabove]

nah i do agree with you there. i can see from the girls angle as to why they might react in a negative way but that doesn't mean they should be disrespectful. I've seen on nights out girls move away from guys all the time. some girls just dont want to be approached and when they do want to be approached you'll know about it, trust me. cold calling on girls doesn't always work. youve gotta look at other things i. e. lot of eye contact from the girl and maybe even a smile.

my mate disagrees with me about that. I've seen him get rejected a lot cause he's had no signals and he still disagrees with me. im not saying it doesn't work sometimes. you are more likely to pull a girl if youve had signals from them to approach than just cold calling if that makes sense.

[Applefan1]

I just don't agree with making cop outs for how women behave. There is too much of letting women get away with anything because of their gender in society.

[noneoftheabove]

im not im just saying how i can see why women react in the way they do. that doesn't make it right. I've seen how some lads have been treated and it really isn't right. i remember tapping a girl on the shoulder about 10 years ago in a shop when we were in the queue. i knew her but she didn't recognise me and she just disappeared very quickly. i was like that was embarassing and awkward haha

[KelBel000]

Great question

I have a situation maybe people can comment opinion?

Me and my best friend S we go bowling every week there's two guys we think are attractive Who work there (Recently found out there brothers) anyway when we bowl apparently according to S they look at their phones then will constantly look at us, phone us , phone us throughout the night. We gone there so many times they practically know us. Anyway so they will look or stare when we bowl and my friend S always looks and catches them. I look at them too but not as much as S anyway when I look they do look at us. Towards end of night they will bowl in a different lane and will look at us according to S (honestly don't know how accurate she is) there's time they look at us and seem interested but there's other times they will stand and flirt with other girls. Or not be joking around with us like normal. Also one of the brothers who I like when I "bug" him for stuff he "acts" at least I hope so annoyed with me and will roll or shake his head and smirk or laugh and will say what do you want?

Mixed signals!!!

All we know about them is:
Names
There brothers

We don't know if:
Single
There ages
If and who is into me or S or even into us at all

Any input helpful thanks

[Shorty1991]

I like your take, some women's behaviour towards guys who approach them is uncalled for and its disrespectful. I actually prefer guys to have a more straightforward approach by saying hi to me. But I just seem to attract guys that lurk around and never talk to me. I was once shy and know how it feels, but none of my crushes ever took me by the hand. So I had to learn the hard way and overcome my shyness.

[Applefan1]

Yes, thank you. You see women like you I have more respect for.

[Shorty1991]

;) thanks

[Applefan1]

It just makes me mad when some women say well men need to grow balls or man up and just talk to us when most of the time it is those very women that abuse men that do talk to them.

[Shorty1991]

Yeah, that makes me mad too. The bunch of hypocrites. But put a shy guy and woman together, no one acts on it and the men say the same about shy women. Haha man up. That's what I was told many moons ago when I was shy. But, I did it and I'm proud of myself for doing so.

[flypaper]

I have been guilty of this ( I make eye contact, smile and say 'Oh no thanks... I have to go') but to be fair I am guessing those guys don't get hit on like that numerous times a day and they don't have to worry about her being able to out power them if the situation takes a turn for the worst. I've also been screamed at and followed because people felt entitled to my time. If I don't know you I don't want to stop and talk to you on the street, I don't feel comfortable or safe. If something ends up happening to me the court could say I asked for it by dressing or talking in a certain way or just from "putting myself in that position". I just feel more comfortable not being put in that situation so I try to just get as far away from that situation as possible. Yes it maybe not the nicest way to deal with the situation but I haven't found a better solution yet. I'll be 30 next year so hopefully this starts to die down a lot with age.

[Applefan1]

I guess the making eye contact and smiling and then saying "no thanks" is because you are shy? If you get hit on a number of times a day you don't have the right to treat people like shit. I can see how you worry about a guy being able to out power you but treating some men like shit will put you in more danger. Having said that the screaming at you and being followed is very wrong. I have already said in my Take I used that video because it shows how women treat men when not in the street to. I made that point very clear SMH… I don't believe the court would ever say you asked for it for any reason it is usually men that have trouble proving they are innocent not women. I don't consider the way you treat men to be acceptable to be honest.

[Applefan1]

You are the one with the bad behaviour so don't complain about men being shy to approach women if you are going to treat men like that. Also don't tell them to "man up or grow balls" and just talk to women. You are just not taking responsibility for the poor way you act towards men. You are wrong and there is no need to treat men like that. Smh…

[Nothanks700]

This Mytake pretty much tells it like it is. This is the reality. Although, I think it's mostly because women get approached so damn often. Imagine bums asking you for change constantly, that's how very attractive women feel after a while. But it's also this societal thing, women feel like they almost have to reject men; it's kind of odd really. But yes, the double standard, of we are supposed to approach women, but shouldn't approach women is a little ridiculous. That guy was pretty normal looking from what I saw as well.

[Applefan1]

Women getting approached that often does not give them any right to treat men this way. That guy was not being a creep.

[Nothanks700]

It doesn't necessarily give them the right, but it does make it somewhat more understandable. They should probably just keep walking and ignore if they really want to, but there's no great way of getting rid of somebody you don't want to talk to. If attractive women stopped and talked at length to every guy that approached them; they'd get nothing done. It's just the way things are, we aren't going to change them. Have you ever watched animal planet? You know what female zebras do when they aren't feeling the advances of a male; they literally kick them in the face. It's this way for many species. Do what you can, be creative in your approach, that's all any of us can do.

[Applefan1]

Meh… Everyone has to deal with problems in life but not everyone is rude about it. Also many of those women are doing it just to start drama and because they think a guy is ugly but don't want to admit they think that so they treat the man like shit. Don't tell me that is not true because that happens a lot. It is simple it is wrong for women to do this no matter the reason, people need to start taking responsibility for their actions instead of blaming people and that is what those women need to do. I bet they would be the first to blame men if men did it to them.

[Nothanks700]

You are falling into the trap of being cynical towards women, which leads to no confidence, which leads to a dead sex life. I am an attractive guy by most people's standards, and I have been rejected in bars etc. point blank before the women even looks at me. There's no easy answer, or solution, you just have to move on.

[Applefan1]

That is not cynical it is the truth. It does not matter the reason it is wrong of women to do that. End of story. Also it is the truth that ugly men get this far more than good looking men. I am not saying good looking men don't get it but that is a fact.

[Nothanks700]

That's called natural selection, not women being a holes. How often do you approach unattractive girls? You are just as guilty, so please stop being so self righteous.

[Applefan1]

It is not natural to be as rude and crude about it as many women are. I understand it is natural for women to go for the good looking guys but there is a difference between the two things. That means I am not being self righteous.

[Applefan1]

Women that are as rude and crude about it as they can be are a holes.

[Applefan1]

So next time get it right before you accuse me of something.

[Nothanks700]

Do you approach unattractive girls? That's what I accused you of, nothing else. Look man, all I'm saying is whining about it is not going to make it better; it will make it worse. It's better to figure out creative ways to approach girls, then to be super upset because they reject you "hello, I'm another random guy that's walked up to you that's not diver ably different than the last twelve"

[Applefan1]

I do not approach any girls now. You accused of more than not approching unattractive girls you accused me of being self righteous which I am not. Women that are rude and crude for no good reason have bad personalities.

[Rawrzz]

Yeaaaaaah. The anxiety of that being possible makes me not approach women. I've only done it in the past when they give me a rather obvious look. I don't talk to them at all, unless it's in some environment where we're introduced or she talks to me.

Although, as a male, you also have to be able to read their signs. If you can tell she's a bitch before you even try, then you can spare yourself some bitchiness. You can't approach them when they're on the phone or are ostensibly in the middle of something, either. I think a lot of men might mess that up by incorrect timing.

The chick who dressed up as a dude is a good source, too:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ip7kP_dd6LU

[hellionthesage]

I would also say that the fact that their is no uniformity anymore in how to approach women also hurts. If you approach and are cocky you just want sex and are an asshole, you are reserved then your boring, if your respectful a pushover. If you try to pay your a sexist asshole, if you don't pay your a cheap asshole. If you hold the door your a sexist bigot if you don't hold the door your a jerk who doesn't know how to treat a lady. Damned if you do damned if you don't. Under the circumstances trepidation is unsuprising.

[lightbulb27]

This is a good question and take. The girl got shot down a bunch of times and I would have probably as well, or maybe coffee date. But she's too aggressive, it seems not genuine... like she wants something from them, and that's why she got turned down so much in my view anyway. When it is fake... male or female, the other person can pickup on it. When it is genuine, you have a better chance.

And that is where creepy comes in from guys... girls are insecure, easily threatned and get approached so much (some of them) they just reflex turn guys down. you have to do it the right way and it works. It can work as a routine for a guy... probably easier that way to keep the emotion out of it. Or genuine. It takes work to manage your emotions. Watching players will help you see what they do and how this works... definitely works male -> female, not sure that works as well female -> male.

[Dim_121]

Nice my take. Though it is not always that they have been hurt before. My I set my freind up perfectly to talk with on of my female freinds durring an event. They were both sitting alone. I suggested that she go sit next to him and talk. I told him she is next to him so talk with her. He just shyly stayed on his phone without even looking at her. She patiently waited about 4 minutes for him to at least say hi. However he never did. Now I did not set them up on a date or say that one liked the other. My freind just does not have the confidence to initiate a conversation. He does not have the experience to. I wish I had sat down next to them and started it. So they would at least have said hi to each other. Some guys just never got the confidence to initiate conversation with a women. I have had a lot more practice and have several female freinds to learn from so I'm confident enough from that. However I would still need a push talking to a girl that I'm infatuated with.

[Asingh]

i got told to 'do one' when i approached a girl. This girl was in my college and knew me a little bit, i asked her for her phone number one day and she said that, and then everyone in my college made fun of me. She spread this so much. It was the worst.

I haven't approached a girl since. And it has given me a confidence issue. And women dont really care.

[Applefan1]

Yes, you see this is what happens. The women that do act this way act this way and then don't care how it affects the man and then just say the man needs to "man up, or grow some balls"

@Reflexy this guy's situation is way too common.

[flakosky]

Thi is such an amazin MyTake. Wow! That is so so so true. That is the main reason why we dint approach because women like the ones we saw in the video act that same way towards us men!

[Applefan1]

Yes, that is very true and I am so pleased you like my take so much. It took about an hour to do this take because I wanted to make it good.

[flakosky]

Man let me congratulate you because this MyTake should be read and seen by every single woman on earth so that they understand! Good job!👍

[Applefan1]

Wow! thank you so much. I needed a compliment right now after how I have just been treated.

[Rocket_Queen]

Thanks for the link, and I definitely think the responses from the women were uncalled for. I actually hate feeling like I'm being mean, so if a guy approached with hi, I definitely tend to stop and shyly and embarrassingly muddle through lol. But what I don't stop for, but still usually at least give a thanks to are the guys that holla' some comment about my body lol. I say thanks and keep rollin. Good take! = )

[Applefan1]

I agree some of the women's responses here are just trying to turn it around to make it men's fault when if a woman acts that way she is the bad person not the man. They just don't want to admit a woman is doing something wrong which I find immature. Yes, I can understand you not stopping for a comment yelled about your body and I am pleased you like the take it is just sad some people are butthurt so easy.

[Rocket_Queen]

Very true.

[Nothanks700]

Call guys who cat call creeps all you want; they are creeps.

[Rocket_Queen]

@Nothanks700 haha, yeah definitely isn't very respectful. Thankfully it's not usually too bad

[BubbleBoy69]

@Nothanks700

Unless of course he is good looking and/or rich then cat calling is a OK. Cat calling is only put in place to shame certain men from expressing their sexual attracted to a woman. It's along the same lines where women will complain to guys about certain guys looking at them when their dolled up and dress sexy for a night on the town.

[Nothanks700]

@BubbleBoy69 dude, cat calling is creepy. End of story. How the hell is it put in place to shame men? Men are the ones doing it; that makes absolutely no sense.

[Rocket_Queen]

@BubbleBoy69 Must disagree. It isn't okay if you're rich or good looking. There are more respectful ways to approach someone than "Damn look at that ass, come here girl". Am I going to cry about it, no. But be real. That isn't respectful.

[BubbleBoy69]

Well the vast majority of women don't seem to mine and in fact give good looking and/or rich guys a pass that they would of given ugly guys/average guys shit for. Your gender clearly has a double standard.

[Rocket_Queen]

@BubbleBoy69 that I won't argue, but you're original comment wasn't about that.

[Nothanks700]

@BubbleBoy69 lol. There are double standards on both sides of the equation. Stop being so damn cynical; you sound like a whiny child. No woman likes cat calling, and I seriously doubt you have witnessed a guy who seems to be rich cat calling someone, that's just stupid. It's objectifying to cat call, and women wouldn't give a pass to better looking guys that cat call. I'd imagine some exception would be made for a Channing Tatum looking dude, but you would also make various exceptions to otherwise social no nos if say Scarlett Johanson did them. There's no double standard here, just basic human consideration and respect.

[BubbleBoy69]

@Nothanks700 There are double standards yes but the difference is men don't create mass campaigns shaming. And women do like cat calling. You'd be a fool to think they don't like the validation. It's just they want it from particular men. And yes I have witness guys who are good looking and cat calling women and the woman didn't mind it. The reason i can say this is because i'm friends with a lot of rich guys and some of my other friends are good looking.

The shit women let them get away with, they would of called out average guy on it. I bet your going to use a cop out now and say oh well your hanging out with shitty girls/people.

[Nothanks700]

@BubbleBoy69 let's be honest, you don't hang out with girls. I live with three of them, have a lot of friends that are girls, and can tell you no girl likes cat calling. Sometimes they pretend they like it, otherwise guys get aggressive. You have no idea what you are talking about, and our pretending to know what happens in female brains. You need to get off your delusional mysoginstic high horse or you'll never be successful with women. And you're 23, you hang out with a lot of rich guys? Give me a break dude.

[BubbleBoy69]

@Nothanks700 Let's be honest. You don't know me and because my view differs from your experience you are now acting like a girl and acting like you know my life. So let's be honest here you are a white knight trying to get pussy points and possibly nude pics by defending women.

And if you were any kind of man with experience you would realize what women say and what they actually do are 2 different things. What comes out of a woman's mouth does not match up with her actions. How many girls call a guy an asshole but consistently sleeps with him? A lot. How many girls complain about being cat called or guys hitting on them but then go out in the world and where the exact same outfit that causes the effect? A lot of them.

The point being you need to go out in real world and look at actions of women. Not what comes out their mouth. I bet you are the same guys when asking advice for women make it female only and then wonder why the advice they give you doesn't work.

[BubbleBoy69]

@Nothanks700 And it's not misogyny for stating reality. But of course your white knight ass will think that because you think women are perfect and incapable of being hypocrites.

[Now your going to tell me you slay tons of girls and have lots of girlfriend for e-brag]

[Nothanks700]

@BubbleBoy69 lmfao. Dude, you have a complex. I don't know why I'd try to impress faceless women on the internet that probably live thousands of miles from me, and I would never even privately chat with someone on here. I'm just saying that your premise doesn't sound believable. You've been out with rich good looking guys who cat call, and women enjoy it? It just doesn't make sense. My whole point is, don't cat call, it's deplorable and yes, mysogenistic

[Nothanks700]

@BubbleBoy69 your ranting me of me trying to get "pussy points" shows how juvenile you tend to think. I'm done arguing with you though, say what you will, I don't care. I was honestly trying to help you out though. No self respecting women is going to date a guy hat thinks like you do.

[BubbleBoy69]

@Nothanks700 And you still delude yourself into thinking women's words are truthful and are face value. Women complain about a lot of shit they can easily be done away with from their own actions yet still keep doing it because they like it like that. As i said before they want the attention from attractive and/or rich men but do not like the cat calling from regular joes. Hence, the complaint. It's along the same lines when they complain about certain guys approaching them. Women by in large want to control which men can do what and while othes can't express any of their sexuality/desires and must keep their head down and not look when they see an attractive woman.

And no you won't trying to help me out. Insulting does not equal helping nor is making assumptions of someone's life.

You were just trying to make jabs at me while trying to force your belief down my throat. A belief that does not match up with reality when we look at all the pieces.

[Rocket_Queen]

@BubbleBoy69 you're comments are all so bitter. Obviously you just aren't getting any women, and I don't blame those women after reading your crap.

[BubbleBoy69]

Yeah i'm bitter. Do you have any more insults about me you'd like to share? When women make criticism of men no guy starts making insult about her being bitter or insinuate she can't get a man in real life or say men should stay away from her.

Yet women on gag. Oh your not kissing our ass and saying some real shit, it must be because you ca't get laid. As if getting laid somehow makes the world right.

[Rocket_Queen]

@BubbleBoy69 all you have done os insult women with comment after comment. At least I'm real with mine and know how to call a spade a spade. I have no problem calling out anyone male or female who is in the wrong, but everything has to be men vs women. Is it really so hard to just call right, right and wrong, wrong?

[BubbleBoy69]

All i have done is make realistic remarks and criticism about women's behavior and hypocrisy in some of their actions. You guys complain about the cat calling, yet still go out with outfits that causes the cat calling to happen. If you didn't want the attention you would not wear those outfits. I live in real world, and I'm not like these desperate and thirsty dudes on gag who messages random girls, and who kiss up to you women and want to start flirty comments with your right in your comment.

If you girls were really non-bias in your opinion you would see the logic where I'm coming from but in typical female fashion you get defensive, you start shaming and then you make the big conclusion that somehow getting sex is the be all fix up to the world. It amazes me when women think men critism of the problem in dating world can all be solved with giving them sex as if men were puppy dogs that just need a treat to stop being grumpy.

[Rocket_Queen]

@BubbleBoy69 I'm sorry... we go out in outfits that cause catcalling to happen? Because we are to blame for what someone else chooses to let roll off of their tongue and out their mouth? Because God forbid they be held accountable for THEIR actions and treat someone with respect. And an example of the last time I was cat called and my outfit... I went to by some hair stuff and was wearing sweat pants and a tank top with a bandana... because that sounds sexy right? My hair piled on top of my head and old make up. But these 2 guys chose to holla about my butt. I see how that's my fault... for having a butt and all.

I also didn't say anything about you not getting sex, and the guy who replied wasn't flirting, but being realistic. Anyway, enjoy your day.

[BubbleBoy69]

Yes you are to blame in the equation. You see a lot of women in this society have a hard time taking any form of responsibility for their actions. Just as you made a conscious choice of dressing in provocative clothing, you cannot control the behavior of how men will respond. Men will look because you are showing a lot of skin, or clothing that will arouse. Some men will respond with cat calling showing and expressing and letting you know they find you sexual attractive. The reasoning u and a lot of women give to this is along the same lines as slut shaming. Women want to go out and have promiscuous sex but yet want to be absolved of people passing judgement. So they want to do as they please but no one can act or make an expression/judgement on it.

And i haven't even gotten to the double standards when i see so many of you girls being fine with the cat calling when it's from men you find attractive.

[BubbleBoy69]

These 2 men found your butt attractive and decided to express themselves verbally. The only reason you are offended is because they won't the men you found desirable.

You made the remark I'm bitter and no women would want me making a slight jab at me not getting any indirectly. Please stop front. The other guy is a white knight who thinks what comes out of a woman mouth is exactly as it seems when time and again women's actions and words do not align. We see this also in what men they say they want and the men they actually end up dating.

[Rocket_Queen]

@BubbleBoy69 you don't know me... obviously. I don't participate in casual sex, have had sex with 3 men. One I dated for 5 years, another I was engaged too, and my husband. And I'm to blame for showing a lot of skin... in sweat pants... and a tank top... so my arms and face showing is reason for a man to be disrepectful and shout disrespectful comments at me? Please just stop. And it had nothing to do with if I found them attractive or not. That theory was already addressed in the question that brought my to this take. That's why I thanked the guy for the link to his take, because we had the same views, only about women calling men creeps, and how that word is overused and only used when a girl finds a man that approached her undesirable. And no... you're not me, how could you possibly know why I found it disrespectful? Maybe because it is. Address me with the same respect I would address you with. And I'm not offended, it takes a lot to offend me.

[BubbleBoy69]

You aren't to blame but your criticism about the men is just nagging. You see the problem women have is they want certain men to express their sexuality, to look and to make remarks at them while others must keep their head down and keep quite. Just as you are allowed to wear what you want. Men are allowed to express their sexual desire and have a reaction to it. Outside of rape. A man should not be demonized for looking at an attractive woman or wanting to express himself verbally that he finds a woman attractive.

Especially when he sees that women have no problem towards it when certain men they deem attractive do it. The double standards are apparent and it is made to look as a form of control by women on some men get a pass to do as they please while other men must be held to different standards.

https://i.imgur.com/0EJzwpA.jpg

Sorry but the mytake has nothing to do with what is being discuss here. What's being discuss is double standard. It has everything to do with attraction.

[BubbleBoy69]

Ah gag and their screwups. Wrong link

https://youtu.be/HGEO6ig8WsM

The above video shows exactly how women bash one type of man while letting another guy get a clean pass through.

And no i'm not you but i've come across women similar to you who seem to very much want only certain men to be allowed to express their sexuality and approach women while other men must keep their head down and die in a ditch somewhere. And if we are getting to respect. You started this convo with me by making a critism about my life and insulting me.

[Rocket_Queen]

@BubbleBoy69 well decide... either I am to blame or I'm not... you have stated both. And no that doesn't give someone the right to say "damn girl let me see that ass"... if you want to approach me and say "hi, I just wanted to say that I find you very attractive" that's appropriate amd respectful. I have no problem with that. I don't see an attractive guy walking through the store and be like "damn bruh you fine, does your dick look as good as you" because I'm not disrespectful.

[BubbleBoy69]

So you live in the ghetto?

I've already decided that women who dress to attract and then complain about the attention they are getting have themselves to blame. I've already stated that men should not be shamed for expressing their sexuality. Some men are more vulgar than others in their approach to expressing themselves but that does not mean it should be shame.

And the reason the vast majority of women do not express themselves in this manner is because:

1. They do not need to approach men. Men approach women.
2. Women by in large express their attraction for men through non-verbal communication such as body language.
3. Women are more timid and don't approach.

Men as a gender are always encourage to approach women and to express themselves and be the more dynamic of the 2 genders. We see the result of this with cat calling.

[BubbleBoy69]

And outside of physical trying to grab and touch you inappropriately a guy saying "damn, let me see your ass" is just a guy who is vulgar and saying you have a nice ass. His expression is poor but shaming him for saying it shouldn't happen.

[Rocket_Queen]

@BubbleBoy69 no I live in the country and please stop making assumptions. And I wasn't dressed to atttact, sweatpants? Cause those are hot. And even if I were that doesn't give anyone the right to treat someone else without respect. And clearly you're not reading my responses, I didn't shame him, said thanks and kept walking which was more than he deserved. And you're wrong. It should happen. That's not okay in ANY world to treat someone with disrespectful. Anyway, I'm done. Clearly we have a difference in opinion here.

[BubbleBoy69]

Exactly you should keep on walking and just ignore him. Outside of harming you or pushing against your boundaries he did nothing wrong. Men are constantly disrespected by women and called names but we don't start campaigns shaming women in masses for how mean they are to us. We have thick skin and move on. Guys may not say things sexual but we are also faced with men/women insulting us for the clothes or any other superficial thing about us when we are out in public. We don't make a scene out of it or beat the person up or demand we respect us. Not everyone grew up with same manners as you and will respect you. This is life.

[Rocket_Queen]

@BubbleBoy69 😂😂😂😂😂 That is NO WAY changes the fact that it is indeed wrong and disrepectful! I seriously am floored by your twisted mindset.

[Rocket_Queen]

@BubbleBoy69 There are people out there who rape, murder, abuse people but that all of the sudden make those things okay because "this is life". Anyway, I've said all I have to say for now.

[BubbleBoy69]

Well the thing about rape, murder is that their are clear guidelines put in place that it is wrong and no matter what you look like your going to go to jail for the action.

However, when it comes to creep shaming or cat calling. It always depends on whether the woman find you attractive and is receptive to it. We can't create a law punishing a men for cat calling because it would be a bias law where only average/ugly men would be punished and good looking guys would get off scott free.

A perfect example of cat calling being appreciated when a girl is in a party, and a drunk, pretty frat boy says words similar to what you mention ealier. Many girls are not only receptive with it but would smile and play along. A less attractive male would be met with scorn and girl giving him mean look.

The double standards are there. Attractive guy gets away with it and therefore more confident. Unattractive/average guy is demonize to express himself and so is less confident.

[Reflexy]

Im always a bit sceptical with these videos because they are probably cherry picking certain responses just to make a point. Personally I've never had much trouble making conversation with strangers. However I have walked up to a person on the street and asked for their number so I dont know about that.

[Applefan1]

Yes, but the point in the video is what actually happens in the real world. Like I said I used that video because it shows what really happens and what many women really do even when it is not on the street which I pointed out in the Take.

[JRICHARDS1996]

I'll play Devil's advocate however and address the elephant in the room: who even approaches someone randomly on the street anyway? That is creepy to begin with regardless of gender. Now a party, club, event, or somewhere of a more social environment is okay, but randomly on the street or coffee shop is just plain weird to me.

[Applefan1]

Ugg! I covered that "who even approaches someone randomly in the street anyway question." The point of posting that video was because it shows how women treat men at other places.

[sweettckae]

Well thats a nice myTake - but answer me this then, I dont call guys creeps or tell them to fuck off. But guys just STARE at me like I have 10 heads but NEVER approach. Why? Im one of those girls that will actually talk to them (no im not desperate), a conversation would be nice on a bus if a man is staring.

[Applefan1]

Lol don't worry I don't think your desperate. The problem is those women that do call men creeps and to fuck off. Men don't know you would actually like to talk to them so they just give up because they know if there is drama then they won't be believed. The women that are so rude destroy it for women like you. They stare at you because they really want to talk to you.

[sweettckae]

Yeah I would love to slap those bitches sideways for ruining the experience for me, good answer though :-)

[Applefan1]

Yeah sadly it is too common these days as well women doing that. However, you can do things to help let men know it is ok to talk to you.

[sweettckae]

I have a (i really hate this word "resting bitch face") and not on purpose, its just how it looks - but I can't be walking around with a smile on my face lol.

[Applefan1]

Well I will be honest that is a problem because men will think you are a "bitch." I am not saying you are because you sure don't sound like you are but it is not normal for anyone to have a smile on their face at all times either. I know I probably look grumpy to women now but it is not really because I am a grumpy person but I am trying to work through 2 major problems in my life where women were involved and I am only just able to stop myself having a breakdown.

[sweettckae]

I am a bitch but when I need to be :-p. Women involved is always a problem, dont you men know that already? Sounds like someone hurt you badly.

[Applefan1]

Yes, us men do know that already! That is why so many men won't talk to women these days. I don't talk to any woman anywhere in public these days. The thing with you is I guess you would not be a bitch to a man that just said "hi" and accepted it if you said you were not interested.

[Nothanks700]

Unfortunately, you don't have that stamped to your forehead. Smile at him flirtatiously, and he should get the hint, or possibly... approach him!! Gasp!! Seriously, I'm all for equality, and I'm sick of doing all the damn work.

[sweettckae]

Well I apologize!! Along with women having bitch faces, there are also cellphones involved, so if a girl is paying attention to her phone she isn't paying attention to the guy and vice versa. Sadly this society sucks with meets and greets. But yeah I get your point...

[Applefan1]

Well yeah!! After what happened to me from a couple of women I get scared when women in public look at me and if they get physically to close to me I freak out and move away and no I am not cause drama I had two really bad things happen to me.

[sweettckae]

so what happened to you?

[BullyDawg]

I'm still a guy who would chance it I am looking for a best friend /friend possibly love of a lifetime and time is still moving on so always open to the chance at a love of a lifetime... Hugz so hi smiles n hugz. 🍀🐶🍀

[shadowofgulash]

And some people wonder, why some men have confidence issues.

[Applefan1]

Exactly!!! It is no surprise is it.

[Izzex3]

All they did was ignore him though?
I try to do the same thing when I'm alone.
I'm not interested nor am I obligated to say hi back and chat with every single guy who approaches me on the street.
But then again I don't complain about guys not approaching.

[Applefan1]

That is not true. Saying "fuck off" is rude. It is not needed and the other women were rude to. I agree no one is obligated to talk to a person but they don't need to be rude like those women to men that have not done anything wrong. If the man won't leave after being told to I can understand but for that to be the first thing a woman says is rude.

[Izzex3]

Ah. My volume is low on my phone so I didn't hear that.
Yeah, that is clearly rude
Some people can be mean or extremely cautious.

[Applefan1]

Yeah, so it is no surprise men have lost their confidence in talking to women if that is the very first thing they are going to get back.

[Izzex3]

Yup.
Agreed.