My relationship of 5 years to my boyfriend ended, after I realized I had no future with him. Not too long after, I started dating. Although it was unhealthy to rebound right away, I met this great guy named Walter. Walter was handsome, a funny guy, super passionate and seemed to be a hard worker.
In the beginning things were incredible. Love letters, flowers, dinners and romance. Walter would spend the whole day just messaging me, and professing how much he loves me and that he wants to marry me. My heart would race just to see him and I couldn't wait! Sure it may have been the honeymoon stage, but no one had ever made me feeling this way before. It wasn't long before I fell for him, and 1 year in we moved in together.
I remember myself as a person that was full of life and energy, optimistic and passionate about whatever I set my mind too. I would go to the gym, and eat healthy- had tons of friends, and just loved being around my family. 8 months of living together with Walter, I had changed.
Walter and I would fight daily about stupid things like the lack of romance or the garbage not being taken out. He would get upset smash furniture, name call me, scream at the top of his lungs and storm out. This continued for about a year. I remember hating coming home. I remember him apologizing for his behavior and doing it again the next week. I remember how my family told me that Walter isn't welcome to my family dinners anymore, after I had come crying to them scared because of his behavior. I was going down a slump and I could feel it...
I had started to eat quite a bit, mope around after work, and question what I was doing. I had gained 16 pounds, and Walter was alluding to the fact that I was gaining weight. I couldn't handle him anymore. One evening I just stood up and told him that we are done. He thought I was joking but after I didn't come home for 4 nights, he quickly recognized I was serious. He wrote me a text stating that he is going to commit suicide. I called the police right away, who were unable to find him. Later on he admitted that he just said that to get me back, but there was no getting me back.
I changed the locks to my residence and coordinated with his family to get them to help me get Walter situated elsewhere. Walter messaged, and called, and knocked at my door for months. I just ignored him, as I hovered in my bed, crying and missing him.
5 months later, I am back to where I want to be. I have re-established my friendships with my family and friends. I started to work out and eat better. The lack of stress has helped me grow, and although I am lonely, I am not scared, and don't walk on eggshells anymore.
I know some people may say that 3 years of my life were wasted on someone that didn't deserve me, but for me it was a learning lesson. I needed something to give me a wake up call, and honestly I would rather be alone than in an unhealthy relationship. It took me a long time to get there. Ladies, and gentlemen- please if someone is throwing temper tantrums, scaring you, manipulating you or even breaking things, get out! Nothing is worth feeling this way. It is not about the hundreds of dollars that I lost in broken furniture, but rather the years of my life that were wasted in being vulnerable and scared.
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