I know this is a sensitive subject, but I'm just trying to help people to decide whether or not they would want to date/marry someone who has kids (especially under 18) from a previous relationship.
You’ll come across the baby daddy/momma at some point
This might cause a lot of drama and conflict, especially if the baby daddy/momma is a nut case. The baby daddy/momma is going to come after the child and/or child support. The baby daddy/momma could use the child to cause conflict. For example, the baby daddy/momma could turn the child against you. There will be disputes over the child’s custody and you will get involved in those disputes. Do you want to hear about and see the ex of your partner? If your partner doesn’t have a child with his/her ex, then there is a big chance that you would never have to see their ex. But if they have a child together, you would have deal with the ex and their bullshit at some point.
You’re going to have to help raise their children too
This includes financially and physically. If your partner is a single parent, then there will be times when your partner will ask for her help and expect you to take care of their kids. Why would you want to raise up someone else’s kid when you could be raising your own instead? Raising up a child isn’t easy, especially when it’s someone else’s. I know it’s not easy because my uncle has eight kids and I sometimes helped raise them. Blended families do cause some problems for children. A new family structure is a big adjustment for a child. Children usually carry feelings of bitterness, hatred, and anger in these situations.
Unless you are a really good person, you’re not going to treat and love someone else's child as your own child. In the animal kingdom, there is no such thing as a step parent. Male lions kill all the cubs when they take over a new pride. I don’t think humans are that different from animals in the way they feel towards children. There are so many stories about evil step parents and it’s been proven through biology that we are more likely to be nicer to children that are related to us.
Half siblings are different from having full siblings
If you don’t want kids, then you shouldn’t be dating/marrying a single parent. But if you want your own kids in the future, your children will have half siblings. Full siblings are already competitive with each other. But because their DNA is closer, full siblings will more supportive of each other. Half siblings may live further apart and not see each other as often as full siblings do. Half siblings usually end up hating each other, especially when they don’t have the same mother. I know this from all the stories I’ve heard from other people who have half siblings and those stories have all ended badly. If the half siblings only have the same dad, there would most likely be a competition over the dad’s affection and resources, and there might be some other deep rooted issues between them. Research also shows that there are negative effects of having a half sibling who has the same mom as you. Fortunately, I haven't had any issues with my half brother and it's probably because he's eleven years older than me and we grew up in the same house together, but it's still different from having a full brother who I share more things in common with. In some ways, having a half sibling is more awkward than having a full sibling.