Things Women Should Realize About Dating and Men Part 2

[Anonymous]

Introduction

Recently I wrote about some things that women may or may not know about struggles or attitudes men face while dating. You can find that HERE. I hope this article can shed even more light on dating for men.

Men realize they like a girl much earlier than women do

It's far more common for a man to develop a crush on a woman earlier than a woman crushes on a man. This happens to women also, but a lot of the time the feelings grow for women. This happens less for men, and something women should take from this is that you really *can't* make a guy like you, because if he didn't before he won't now.

Men try to impress you because we don't have much of a choice

Men show off not because they think they're better than everyone else, it's because they need to separate themselves from the sea of other men out there. How can an average joe with a 9-5 get attention? Maybe he takes up a cool hobby or buys an expensive car. Is it effective? To a degree it does. No one likes average, you need to have some interesting or you're seen as replaceable.

We crave femininity

We want you because you have that female essence we can't replicate. Of course we want you to watch a football game with us or play video games with us from time to time. Most men can attest to this, no one can make us feel better than sympathy and compassion a woman shows us. It's honestly a magical thing, and any woman reading this should realize now that she has a superpower.

We absolutely friendzone girls

I want to put this to bed once and for all. Some people think that it's only men that get friendzoned. Somehow a man would *never* have platonic only feelings for a girl and crave sex from everyone with a vagina. It's just not true. Yes there are desperate guys who would wife up anyone but most normal men have standards and need chemistry with a potential girlfriend.

We want to feel valued by you

If being valued and appreciated isn't #1 for most men, it has to be in the top 3 for most of them. We really want to be seen as your superhero. We may not be the most handsome man, but if we feel that way it goes a long way. If he is doing a lot of nice things for you, and goes out of his way for you, then it would mean a lot to him that you express how valuable he is to you.

We aren't anymore prone to cheating than women

Some men cheat, in fact, a lot of men do. But if you look at statistics men and women cheat at about the same rate. Some countries men are worse while women are worse in others. It's a risk men and women both share and putting the blame on either one will not solve the problem.

Finally, most men love women and we want them in our lives

I have empathy towards a lot of men on this site who make harsh generalizations towards women. Perhaps they have had bad experiences in the past that paints a bad light on them. MGTOW and INCELS are a rather small and extreme population that doesn't represent most men. I guarantee the majority would drop most of the hate and rhetoric if they found that right girl. The problem is that they never look at their own problems, but instead blame others. For the rest of us, we want you in our lives because you compliment us quite well. You have some gifts that other men really couldn't provide for us. So thanks to all the kind hearted women out there for making our world better.

[Anonymous]

I understand a lot of this and 100% see where you're coming from.
But I'm gonna nitpick a couple of things.
First of all, I know this is only referring to men in this take but the 2nd point applies to women and men. It's the name of the game for both parties. Women don't just rock up to a bar in sweatpants without makeup, don't try to make good conversation and expect a date. Men ask women out because they were impressed. Even if they are only after sex and it is purely on the basis of looks. It's not really a man thing. There may be differences in what efforts men and women make as men and women care about different things but impressing a potential partner is just a given regardless of gender.
Secondly, 'I have empathy towards a lot of men on this site who make harsh generalizations towards women. Perhaps they have had bad experiences in the past that paints a bad light on them. MGTOW and INCELS are a rather small and extreme population that doesn't represent most men. I guarantee the majority would drop most of the hate and rhetoric if they found that right girl.'
I disagree with this a lot.
Just because a man has had bad experiences in the past doesn't mean his hatred towards women and his harsh generalisations are justified. If a radical feminist had been wronged by a man/men and now harbors hateful views towards all men then fuck her. She's still a misandrist. I don't give a damn why.
I'm not just talking about men and women with slight reservations and distrust as you mentioned incels and mgtow. These are men that are misogynistic and have extremely malicious views on women. Incels idolise people like Elliot Rodger, that's some mental instability I'd like to steer clear of. Recently, a man killed 10 people and injured 15 after declaring what he called 'an incel rebellion'. This is a group that has been known to advocate violence against women. This may be on the more extreme end of groups like these but still. 'The right girl' is not going to fix the deeply rooted issues that these men are facing.
They need to get past these issues before they date anybody.
I definitely wouldn't have given Valerie Solanas any empathy or sympathy.
I've had some really bad experiences with men but I don't hate every man for their mistakes. It's rationality and being a decent human being.
Sorry for the very very long answer.
I understand and empathise with everything else you said, although, I think the first post was a little more eye-opening.

[ManOnFire]

I liked your first Take a lot more, though there are still some things that are true in this one. It is definitely true that we do "friendzone" women, and I personally believe that women cheat more than men, not because they can but because they want to.

"Men show off not because they think they're better than everyone else, it's because they need to separate themselves from the sea of other men out there."
- I would agree with that, yeah.

[FatherJack]

Women do have far more opportunity to cheat , if they so wish.

[Browneye57]

Reasonable. Yes, most men do love women, and they love the women in their lives. But there is a difference between men and women, and the FI tries to convince us all we're all the same, which is a giant FAIL.

And finally, guys don't have a 'feminine side'. This is all a fabrication by women. In actuality, they look for their man to be their emotional rock, something to hold onto in their whirlwind storm of emotions and feelings. Besides, they really don't want us breaking down into tears every time they do. :)

[levantine99]

MGTOWS dont care to find the "right girl". thats blue pill mangina logic according to them. cause... AWALT (all women are like that). hypergamy is in our nature. but then again MGTOWs will be eliminated from the gene pool which is a good thing in most cases. same with incels and tradcons that want to revive patriarchy. (those might reproduce but are domesticated and only bark but don't bite... .)

[TheUglyMan]

Where do you get this idea that incels want to revive patriarchy?

[Unit1]

MGTOW is what you see would be natural selection in progress. It is a continuous process. It works. Too bitter and angry at the opposite sex to leave more women for us normal men out there. I think it's a good thing.

[TayTay21]

The hypothetical guy you describe is rare. If that's a portrait of you, then you probably already do pretty well with women. But most guys aren't like this. Way too many guys out there are jealous, self-important d-bags who can't figure out why girls don't like them. My boyfriend is a former college football player who can squat a compact car and has a great career, yet I get these dweeby losers whose moms pack their lunches ask me why I'm with him. Totally unrealistic...

[ZeroOhThree]

Those dweeby guys really dodged a bullet. You sound like a cunt.

[Anonymous]

Is it always true a man can't fall in love with a girl later on/gradually?

I like a guy I've known for a long time, but we only got to really know each other recently. I feel like it's mutual, but it definitely wasn't anything when we were just acquaintances.

[myTake Owner]

I suppose it can happen, but with men it's less likely. We usually know we like a girl earlier and it doesn't change later on.

[Opinion Owner]

Does that start when you first see her (love at first sight) or when you first get to know her?

[CubsterShura]

"Men try to impress you because we don't have much of a choice" I understand where that comes from, but I don't think so you need to pick up a hobby even when you don't like it for the sake of getting a girl. ._.

[myTake Owner]

Well obviously you should have at least some interest in it.

[CubsterShura]

True. It's not sexy when a guy does something and his face looks like that of a toddler who was forced to eat something bitter.

[Jon_25]

You mean sour?

[CubsterShura]

@Jon_25 Many kids actually like sour. My little niece does.

[Jon_25]

Oh. I always hated sour, so did my brothers. We were fine with bitter though. I guess it's just different tastes? Although cocoa powder and lemon wedges are a bit far out for either.. you don't like lemon wedges do you? 😅

[CubsterShura]

@Jon_25 I like squeezing lemon on everything but can't eat lemon wedges. When I was younger I wasn't allowed to eat anything sour or citrus not even ketchup so I kind of got used to it and still don't like eating much sour food.

[Jon_25]

You had good parents.
Our dad used to give us lemon wedges when we were really little because of the faces you make. I saw him do it with some of my younger brothers, and it is pretty funny actually.. but ya I don't like sour anyways.

[CubsterShura]

@Jon_25 Actually for me eating sour was forbidden by the doctor.

[Jon_25]

Oh, okay. Well at least you didn't miss out on any good stuff, in my opinion.

[CubsterShura]

@Jon_25 Actually, I badly missed lemon and ketchup.

[Jon_25]

Ketchup is sour? I never liked lemons, but you have a point if you do like them it would be missing out.

[CubsterShura]

@Jon_25 Tomato is a good source of vitamin c so I wasn't allowed tomatoes and ketchup.

[Jon_25]

Oh. Ya that makes sense.

[Agent]

Could you elaborate more on the third point?

Would you say it could roughly be translated into:

"We crave the presence of a female who adheres to Western standards of femininity when it comes to her behavior"
?

Cause this can start to become subjective.

[JayParris]

Name a non-western society that doesn't expect or pressure women to be feminine.

[Agent]

@JayParris You're missing the point. Whether a behavior qualifies as "masculine" or "feminine" is dependent upon the culture of your location. All it takes is a highschool psychology/sociology class to be wary of this fact.
I'm not much of a cultural adherent; I don't click with the cultural expectations of males or females in the West.

[JayParris]

Ok. So then name a non-western society that defines femininity as something other than what western society defines it as.

[bubble_tea]

Great take! Not saying what you said isn't true or that I know an exception, but why is it that men can make women fall in love with him, but women can't make men fall in love with her?

[myTake Owner]

Men can't make a woman fall in love with him. Love isn't something you can make someone do

[bubble_tea]

Oh.. I assumed you meant that when you said feelings grow for women, but it's not the case for men.

[myTake Owner]

What I'm saying is men usually like a woman early on while it takes time for a women to like a man

[bubble_tea]

Because guys can crush on looks alone, but girls crush on personality?

[Anonymous]

"We absolutely friendzone girls"
That's not friendzoning, that's having female friends, there's a difference.
Guys can have female friends, but they don't friendzone.

"Finally, most men love women and we want them in our lives"
You're talking more about incels and less about MGTOW.
MGTOW suggests that not getting too preoccupied with women is good for your health. Incels on the other hand very much identify with their preoccupation with women.

[Gurla]

Do you think a mans feelings can change about a woman and decide to get out of the friendzone that he initially initiated between them?

[myTake Owner]

possible, but not likely

[Ellie-V]

The hero thing is some bs. I get everything else, but really? Guys have such a huge ego that apparently needs to be breastfed and it's ridiculous.

[LegateLanius]

We absolutely friendzone girls
- No one ever friendzones someone. They do it to themselves.

[Unit1]

Hahaha 😆. That's kind of true.

[sillygirlyjfc]

these are quite normal things that most people know. but still, good job

[myTake Owner]

Most people don't believe it or not

[coachTanthony]

why ANON?

[ovoxo_]

You seem like a hopeless romantic. Here's no such thing as "that right girl". Simply smash and pass these bitches and you'll be happy! 👍

[Jon_25]

I like this take. This is a good take.

[opurba]

How he treat his being a man thing?

[Anonymous]

Link to the first part, please.

[Opinion Owner]

Oh, never mind.

[azzntittiz]

booooo

[myTake Owner]

Boo-hoo

[Agent]

must have accidentally pressed enter early
you forgot to add "bs" at the end

[CoffeeWC]

This type of take can be pretty offensive.

[RedRobin]

Nice take