Exclusive but not serious? What does serious mean?

I've been casually dating this guy for about 2 months and it had been going pretty well until I started develop feelings for him. The other day I asked him what we were doing and he said that he thought he'd been clearly signalling that he wasn't looking for anything serious. I pointed out that a lot of things he'd been doing, like holding my hand, kissing me in public, taking on dates, seemed to indicate the opposite. But he just said he wasn't looking for anything serious but that he didn't want either of us to date or hook up with other people.

I kind of think this is a bit unfair and trying to have it both ways. Like if you want to be exclusive then there should be a possibility of the dating heading somewhere - right?

tl;dr: So, basically, I'm wondering what serious means to guys? What does not wanting something serious mean? Can you not want to be serious but still want to be exclusive? Am I basically just a booty call or do the dates mean something?


Most Helpful Guy

  • It means you're a great companion, but there's no chance that he'd ever have kids with you and/or marry you. Most guys I know are gravitating toward that setup. I don't like the exclusivity thing though, girls start getting expectations about having a future with a guy when you do.

    "Am I basically just a booty call or do the dates mean something?" -- Well, he likes you and wants you to stay around--you're probably pleasant, and of course, there's sex. But he isn't going to marry you or have kids.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Exclusively dating=Boyfriend/Girlfriend
    It's agreeing not to see anyone else.
    He just doesn't want to label it, because then he has to offer all the other stuff that comes with relationships. He wants just the early, fun parts that don't require commitment.

    • You just haven't defined the relationship. So you need to do that or tell him you want to see other people that might give you what you want. Because he isn't

What Girls Said 1

  • It means meeting the parents. The girl becoming a girlfriend instead of a girl he's seeing.