Asking a guy out: bad idea or not?

[Anonymous]

Office attraction. I think he is interested and I am too. He's tried to ask me out about 3 times and I have about twice. Each time we tried to ask each other out something got in the way like we were unavailable or I said something that made him decide not to ask me... e. g. last time he was about to ask me out to this concert and just before he did I said something silly like 'jazz is not really my cup of tea'. And it made him change his mind :( :( :( (I know I know)

So I bought these tickets to this concert that I really want to go see. I think he would be interested too. I was thinking of saying to him: "hey I've bought these tickets to see _______ and my friends aren't really keen on coming with me. Would you like to go with me?"

I want to make it seem more casual which is why I put in the 'friends aren't keen on it' thing. With all that's gone on it does seem like he doesn't want to be cornered into a date or something. I'm confused... as you can see! Any thoughts appreciated :)

Say "hey I've bought these tickets to see this concert and my friends aren't really keen on coming with me. Would you like to go with me?"

Don't ask him and just wait for him to make the next move.

[EmBem]

Ask him if he is interested in going just like the way you said though make it more of a friendly get together and see where things go from there.

[bubble_bea]

Definitely ask him out. You can leave out the friends part maybe

[luvme56]

You should definetly ask het out! :)

All the best!

[Justme1703]

Definitely just go for it. It's a win win situation whatever happens. You only live once :)

[Iron_Man]

Sure why not I like the idea I voted A

[Asker]

this is the complication. he's divorced but not 100% ready to date yet I think. I asked him out once to a party (the last time) and he turned me down. So I don't want to be putting myself out there again... or I'm just worried I'll get shot down. I think he doesn't want it to be a 'date date' ?

[Iron_Man]

Are you sure you want to get involved with a guy that is like that and already turned you down? I did ot read that part

[Asker]

Well here's the story. He asked me out once or twice but I was busy etc. so couldn't go. Then I invite him to a party - he says no he's going out with friends that day. About a week or two later he says, "there's this gig on the weekend by this jazz singer". I stupidly say, "I'm not a big fan of jazz" ... and I see him change his mind and decide to not ask me. So that's the last incident. I don't get him.

[Iron_Man]

Ok well since you both already asked each other out already Its no longer about pride. You ask him out to something very simple, tell him lets get lunch or dinner sometime and just tell him what days you have off and what's a good time for you. Its best for you and tell him what days you have off leaving the ball in his court to make the move. Try not to be so picky next time about things you don't like, guys don't really think about oh she does not like Jazz, they take it as an excuse the female is making to get out of it when everything is new at first. The whole Idea is to get together and get the ball rolling

[Asker]

Thanks :) yeah i think i might ask him. I have to prepare myself for a 'no' but I'm a big girl I can take it.