I met a guy on a dating site that I am very attracted to. After a couple of dates he:
- Deleted dating profile.
- Wanted me to meet his friends.
- Never talked about sex or touched me inappropriately.
- Added me on FB.
- Stopped uploading suggestive photos with women. He used to have tons of those.
- Told me he does not sleep around.
- Had a relationship talk. Told me he becomes friends with a girl before moving onto a relationship and that the most important part of a relationship is trust. And that there would be no trouble commiting if you really like that person.
- I had a holiday. He was very afraid that I won't be back and asked me details if I would come back. Was relieved when I told him I will be coming back.
-Never takes out his phone unless to show me something.
-Never looks at other women. When a girl flirt with him and I went outside to "bin my drink", he immediately left that girl and followed me outside.
However there are two red flags. After dinner he wanted to take me to a bar despite that I told him I don't drink. Also, now he wants to take me plane spotting but wants me to take me for a drive after. Should I be concerned?
- Yes he only wants a hookup.Vote A
- He wants a relationship.Vote B
Most Helpful Guy
Your vote is only a choice between him either hooking up with you, or wanting a full relationship. From what you've said, everything is very positive. Guys work really hard to impress the girl they are interested in. However, the red flags you pointed out aren't really that red, so much as just yellow. The Red flags that I'm noticing is the fact that he has seemed to do a complete change around for you. Humans are creatures of habit, and I'm not saying that people can't change, because they can, major changes take time and effort. I'm certain that you are really interested in this guy, but I would tread very softly until you really get to see his true nature. Because people can act a certain way around someone, but when they get comfortable, their true nature comes out and then you can make a fair judgment of that person. It's normal to want to show your best side to someone you like.
As for wondering if he just wants to hook up with you, that's really easy, don't sleep with him. Some guys will go to incredible lengths to sleep with a girl. Don't get me wrong, just because a guy does want to sleep with you, 'hook up' with you, doesn't make them the devil. However, even with good guys, if you give it up too early, they lose respect and interest in you, so hold out on sleeping with each other at least until you are actually in a relationship. When a guy works towards something, puts money, time, effort, and commitment into something (especially in dating) they want to hold on to it more. So when you do decide to sleep with this person, they won't be so quick to put in that much time and effort, just to leave you. Honestly, he does initially sound like a nice guy who is genuinely interested. Sorry for writing so much2
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